Issue Resolved, Thanks

I, personally, don't see the big deal.
But then I am not at all sensitive about nudity. It's just skin. It's just a body, everyone has one.
I have taught my daughter to not run around naked anymore, now that she is older, but when she was that age, she ran around naked and and no one bothered to care if she saw them naked.
Like my husband would get out of the shower and come intot he bedroom with her there and we did not think much of it.

Now that she is older, we try and have a little more modesty, just so she doesn't go taking her clothes off at friends houses and stuff.

We have ALWAYS told her that no one should EVER touch her where her underwear goes.
But as far as walking aroud naked, me, my mom, my husband, my daughter...
Never saw an issue.
In Greece, on vacation, I saw a woman sitting on the beach topless building sand castles with her 3 boys, all at various ages.
The littlest one was completely naked, the oldest was around 10 or so and wearing a speedo.

I don't think nudity needs to be a big deal, just me.

Americans need to lighten up a bit about nudity. It's the human body, we all live in one.

There are so many real issues to be concerned about in this world, I don't see this situation as one of them.

Doesn't bother me at all. I want nudity to be normal to my kids, the less fordbidden it is, the less exciting it is. Plus it's healthy to see different body types. And especially his grandma should be fine!

Woah there mama.
You need to let this go. There is no "conversation" that needs to happen with him other than, "Hand outta my shirt buddy! (said with a smile)" Seeing grandma naked is not making him want to put his hand down people's shirts.
You think grandma got out of the shower, danced a song, and acted a fool in front of your son? Of course not. She got dressed. He is not damaged from this. Nudity after the shower is normal.
L.

I don't see this as a problem. I used to go in the bathroom with my Gramma while she sat on the toilet and talk to her, or she would dress in front of me, it was no big deal, she was my Gramma. I walk around naked in front of my girls all the time (9 & 6), and so do they. We don't teach our kids to be ashamed of their bodies. Modesty is one thing, but shame is quite another. Don't teach your young son that there's something wrong or "bad" about the human body, because there's not. He won't remember it anyway.

It's normal and OK, IMO.
The time to stop dressing/Undressing in front of kids is when they're uncomfortable.
The hand down other women's shirts has nothing to do with Grandma changing in front of him. It's time for you to teach some nursing request manners.

Grammar police: curiosity has been "piqued"

I don't see a problem.

As to the hand down the shirt. 2 year olds don't understand context. If he can put his hand down your shirt, why not someone else's? He's two, if you want him to ask to nurse in a more appropriate manner, you need to teach him. I teach my kids at 8 months or so the sign for milk.

Don't see this as a problem. He is 2.

At 2 your child will not remember grandma naked.. At about 4 your child will remember.

Since you breast feed, your child assumes all womens breast are available to be nursed with or to be comforted with.. So you need to teach him, to no longer do this with you. Get him to use his words for nursing. He is old enough to say what he wants.

It is perfectly normal in our society for a two year old boy to see a woman other than his mother naked. Especially grandma! That is why boys are allowed in ladies change rooms until they are five years of age. Why would grandma think any differently? You should teach your son that it is not ok to put his hands down anybody's shirt, including yours.

I think the issue here is more jealousy than the naked issue. You were the one he went to for milk and now he sees other women have boobs that may be available to him and that made you uncomfortable b/c you are the one to get milk from. The simple fact he is now doing this is the sign to discontinue BFing - IMO. Laure A is right - if you are going to continue BFing, teach your son the proper way to ask for milk - grabbing at your shirt/boobs is very inappropriate behavior indeed.

Oh please let this go. Son sticking his hand down blouses is normal. He's two! He is checking to see if there are milk bottles in their shirts too. Why wouldn't he? Your mother probably thinks it is funny because it is!

Nude bodies are not taboo, they're normal. Relax, mom, relax.

Why was he upstairs unsupervised in her room leaving her that as the most obvious option? And, you're WAY overthinking it if you are going to have "conversations that could have waited", he's just turned 2!!!!! As far as the hand down a shirt, that's on you - he should have learned a loooooooooong time ago an appropriate way to request nursing, that's why he found it appropriate to put his hand down another person's shirt... grandma didn't do anything wrong.

please don't make nudity taboo! It's a part of life, & if your son is seeing you/dad naked....then it's not going to affect him to see Granny's body either. He has been taught it is normal & acceptable. Shame on you for responding so harshly to Grandma's actions!

& as for that hand down the shirt....that's part of how you've allowed him to behave. He believes it to be acceptable, because you've taught him that. Time to step up to the plate & teach him a more appropriate way to request feeding. Peace!

EDIT: WHY the Heck would you delete your own words? Crazy, crazy!

My 2.5 year old does not still breast feed but I still change, use the bathroom, and sometimes shower in front of him. His dad sleeps nude so Oliver has pretty much seen everything there is to see.m

When my mom watches him, Im sure that he has seen her change and use the bathroom.

Not a big deal in my opinion

I think you are making a big deal out of nothing.

no big deal.. he is still a baby. he didn't see anything that shocked him..

I'd really like to know what you meant by "conversations that could have waited quite some time will have to be had." ? He's 2, what conversations could arise from a naked grandma with a kid who clearly has seen mom naked. It's all the same parts, maybe with a few more wrinkles, but still the same.

Okay we are a little more liberal then most in my house, and I know that, a family of 10 and one bathroom will do that to you, but it was just a naked body. Privacy and modesty comes on the childs terms, and for every child this will be different. Naked bodies are not shameful, they are literally a part of who we are. No reason to turn them into a negative, which at 2 will be really easy to do.

Mine have also seen their grandma and older siblings change, no confusion on their roles in my childrens lives, again not sure how this would confuse your son.

As for the hand down the shirt thing....my none breastfed kids did this here and there. A simple no we don't do that was all it tool, after a time or two of course, again not a big deal.

My grandson is now 7, and just recently has been becoming modest about being nude in front of adults, and that's quite normal. That's the signal that adults should also be more modest in front of the child.

Some kids get to this stage earlier, some later, a few are never bothered by it. Family culture probably has a great deal to do with this. Children do not get confused by "practical" nudity, or by caregivers using the toilet in front of the child during potty training. What causes confusion are prohibitions against nudity (as many babies love to be nude), and messages of alarm, shame or embarrassment about naked bodies.

Up to the age of about 3, my grandson put his hand between my boobs a couple of times when he was hurt and his mom wasn't handy to offer this comfort. I'm a pretty level-headed person, but I found this profoundly touching, to be "needed" in this way, and it brought back with a surprising rush the tender mommy feelings I had during my own daughter's babyhood. It was, in a way, "exciting" to be needed again like a mommy, but there was nothing about it that stirred possessive or sexual feelings. Just tenderness, the kind that makes you say, "Awwww, SO sweet!" This seems to me to be well within the range of normal. (And consider, many babies in many cultures had other women nurse them because the mom couldn't; lots of tenderness and love, but mom is still the mom.)

I can't imagine how such an event wouldn't stir some sort of feelings in your mother(-in-law's?) maternal heart, and if you become a granny, you may find yourself puzzling through the same grey areas someday. I don't think it's necessarily something to be concerned about, but if it turns out otherwise, you have a year or two before this will be likely to become confusing for your child. But if it's too uncomfortable for you, why not just tell your mother(-in-law?) what you are feeling. Make it about you, not about her, because you don't know what her "excitement" means unless you ask her about it. (She may not know, either, it may have been just an unexpected rush of feeling.) You have a right to put this off-limits if you are too bothered by it.

This is not a big deal.

The only 'issues' are yours not your child's. if you can't get over them talk with Grandma & explain it makes YOU uncomfortable.

But please know it IS NOT effecting your child!

And the hands down the shirt is a normal BF baby/child behavior...it doesn't have anything to do w/seeing Grandma naked $ doesn't have to be made a big deal at all... A simple 'Hey now Mr. those are mine' with a smile is plenty, then move on!

It's fine until they are about 4 or 5 years old.
You would take a child that age into a bathroom stall or changing room or locker room with you rather than have them out of your sight.
Most parents will shower with their kids at that age and it's fine.
Grandma's not excited and 2 yr olds won't have any sense of privacy or personal space or shame till he's a few years older.
Why does it bother you?
He knows breasts are for milk and you're extended nursing him.
You are just upset that he's willing to try other cows so to speak and he doesn't realize that you're his only milk source.
In some cultures it's perfectly acceptable for a grandmother to nurse her grandchildren.
Some might take this as a sign that it's time he be weaned.
It's just a comfort thing for him at this point and he's eating plenty of other foods.

For some perspective, the health club I belonged to had a policy allowing boys under 4 years old in the ladies locker room. Never caused any problems.

ETA: Hi. Just a reminder, this is supposed to be a searchable site. Which means that when you remove your question (for whatever reason), you ruin it for the other moms who are looking for similar answers. Which means you aren't helping anyone but your selfish self.

Don't do that. Because it sucks.

Original: He's two. He has no concept of privacy and he shouldn't.

I didn't pay any attention to nudity around my kids until they were in preschool (about age 4) and we could actually have discussions about it. If he doesn't have the vocabulary to understand the concepts, it really doesn't matter.

Just let it go.

I really don't see the big deal. He is only 2 years old! You can't say your teaching him modesty and personal space if you and your husband are still showering with him. I don't see the big deal. I still sometimes shower with my 5 year old son. Sometimes it's just faster that way. Nothing weird or innapropraite about it. We are not weirded out by nudeness in our home. Although my husband will not change or get dressed in front of our 8 year old daughter. He does feel a little weird but that's only because she is getting older now, which I do agree with on that part.

Honestly, it's all in your preferences. If it bothers you, say something.
Me personally? I don't see the big deal. It's not like your son will look at back on that moment later and have issues. He's 2. He won't remember anything about it. I got dressed all the time in front of my son when was that age. Now that he's almost 7, it's a different story entirely.
I don't know what kinds of questions he's asking, but it's probably the normal 2 year old body part questions. I went through this with my oldest, and now my 2 year old. Why do I have breasts and why doesn't she. When will she get breasts... so on and so forth. They are just curious and those questions are typical at this age. I just answer them and move on without making a big deal about it. If you make a big deal, so will they!

You're worried about the wrong thing. Nothing wrong with grandmom changing in front of grandson, not for a long long time. YOU however have to teach your son not to stick his hands down your shirt when he wants to nurse, if he is not verbal, he can learn signs for milk and please! Please is a very useful word to learn at this age, he can point to things and say please and this teaches him to use his words when he wants something even before he can use many words.

It wouldn't bother me.

Weird for an adult but not for a 2 year old. I completely understand why you would be more than a little uncomfortable with him seeing Grandma naked. But I doubt he is phased by this at all. In fact, I bet he's already forgotten about it. If I had to come up with an age, it would probably be 4. Then again, unless there is a family changing room, I have to take my 4 year old into the locker room with me.

I think it's quite common for a 2 year old to put his hands down a shirt. My son did that to me at 2 years old (drove me crazy), and he hadn't nursed since he was a month old. He's my formula baby.

It's easy for you (and us) to make the connection between hands down the shirt and wanting to nurse, but I think that's just a kid sitting on a lap, being curious.

Honestly, everything sounds perfectly normal to me. I'm pretty sure seeing Grandma naked is a distant memory, and you're doing just fine!

Yes, I always allowed my toddlers to see me naked, and so did grandma.

Good responses below.

Sorry, but he's too young for this to be an issue -- period.

You are taking (very understandable) adult anxieties and applying them to a toddler. But these anxieties are relevant to YOU, not to HIM.

When my own son was that age, he found it fascinating to close the bathroom door ("Hi privacy") and open it ("Bye-bye privacy") over and over again. I mention that because he was too young to have an actual concept of privacy -- he just knew grownups cared about the bathroom door, so it became interesting to him.

SO, if you think your mom was just not with the program of teaching personal space (that wasn't part of the child-raising curriculum a generation ago), let this go for now.

But if you think there's any chance she might touch him inappropriately, or have him touch her inappropriately, then by God, cut all of contact and notify the authorities -- I mean it. But if it's not that, then your concerns can "keep" for a year or two.

Well, he sees you naked and you are different than him. Grandma is just another person. I don't think it's a big deal since you are naked with him. I personally find that odd but to each their own. I didn't let the kids bathe with me once they started walking. Then I put them in their seat in the bathtub and they played while I sat in the room for a while.

ehhh, at two i think its no big deal. But if you feel weird about it, then perhaps there is something weird about her. But in general I see no issue on this at age two. If it were me I'd just casually mention that you want there to be opposite sex privacy on nudity by age three. That way you don't make her feel too bad for it now but you've set the boundary.

I want to say that my mother started being private with her naked body (but not bra and panties) with her grandsons before age 4. However, she does not go out of her way to be private with granddaughters. It seems to me that a lot of moms on here have a double standard if the tables were turned and it was grandpa being nude in front of granddaughters. And I do see a difference between parent nudity and grandparent nudity. My daughter is 5 almost 6 and dad does not cover up, but I sure expect grandpa to.

What Birdsfreakmeout (and most everyone else) said.

1) I think you are making a very big deal out of nothing. If grandma were taking your son out somewhere, for example, I would fully expect her to take him in the restroom with her. He's a toddler, she was watching him.

2) I understand what you mean about excitement over your son wanting to maybe nurse from grandma. My mom gets the same way; she actually asked if she should "comfort nurse" my first when she watched him. I was so horrified I don't know what I said. Grandchildren must trigger some strange hormones in older women, or maybe our moms are cuckoo.

I still nurse my 2yo (just about two and a half, if you want to use that), and he knows not to stick his hand down any other woman's shirt. His nanny taught him that, just because I was never around when he was requesting it from someone else. (If I was around, then he wanted only me.) He's still a baby, and your mother felt needed by him. She felt good that he sought comfort from her. That's okay.

I would not like for my mother to be naked with him at this age, and I would not allow it. I understand that you were at her house, so you were relaxed and letting him hang out with his grandmother. I keep closer tabs on mine even when at my mother's house. I would have known that she was planning to shower. I don't think that you should have any big talk. Now that you know that she has no problem with changing in front of him, you should speak up. When you see him heading off to her room, go with him. If you want to leave him with her, ask her to let you know if she needs to get undressed so you can get him out of there and give her privacy. That should tip her off that you don't want him in there while she's undressed. If she insists that it's no problem, then you just emphasize that you'd rather she have her privacy, since that's what you're teaching your son.

She does not live with you, and she can't read your mind, so she doesn't necessarily know what your goals are for him and your timeline with teaching him certain things. Also, grandmothers feel like our children are theirs, by extension or default or whatever. Sometimes they have to be reminded that you are calling the shots, but they also require a little wiggle room. Put your foot down with things that are important to you, no matter how small they are for someone else. If you love that person, though, and value the relationship that that person has with your child, then make a point of also giving in to some things that are less important to you. If they are going to have a relationship apart from you, then you have to allow some freedom for them to bond.