Looking for Advice/Words of Wisdom - Growing Family

Hi! I just wanted to let you know that I had my 3rd baby this past summer. I have an 8 1/2 yr old, 2 1/2 yr old and a 5 month old. My 8 1/2 yr old is so much older then the other two that it really doesn't effect anything. She's just a piece of cake!

So with the younger two...it really isn't that bad. I was nursing my youngest (until I had to stop because he has a deadly allergy to milk product) and had no probs with my other one. What I did was bought my 2 yr old a few "special" toys that I brought out only when I was nursing. I got him playdoh, special coloring books/crayolas and paints (toddler safe ones). I would have them in a place that when I was about to nurse, I would just pull them out and give them to him. He loved it! I also kept a few books by me because he liked to snuggle me while I nursed and I would read to him. It is also a good idea to keep a special DVD/Video in the player to put on as a back up. Everyone baby and every situation is different. You WILL come across times you want to scream...but I promise you...the other times more then make up for that. In the begining it is tricky to juggle, but as you go, you find your routine. I find that to be the most important. Right now I am just trying to get them down for their afternoon nap at the same time! Oh! I also gave my 2 yr old a doll that he can take care of while I take care of the baby. He loves that!

I wish you tons of luck! I remember going on my 2nd and thinking would I love this child the same?? I mean, my daughter was my life! How could I possibly love anyone or anything as much as her? How could I divide my attention? And then this beautiful, bright-eyed little boy came into my life and just like that....my world changed and everything fell into place! It is truly amazing how things do that. Also ~ I recommend stocking up on "fast" cleaning products such as lysol wipes, hand sanitizer, toilet throw away thingys, disposible whatevers....because you will notice that you don't have time like you did before and the time you do have...you will not want to spend it deep cleaning!

Dear E.,

First of all, congratulations. And don't worry it will be fine. I have a daughter who is 29months and a son that is 14 months. It is definately an adjustment, but the key to making things work is don't let yourself get too worked up. Stay calm and everyone else stays a little calmer. Husband may have to pitch in more with the laundry and cleaning. (I treat myself to a cleaning service 1 every six weeks, wish I could afford more often!) I found the newborn and toddler were much easier that the toddler and toddler (but my cousin has twins, so I also know how easy I have it).

Nursing with a toddler, I read to my daughter while I nursed, she would turn the pages and I would read. Also, doing art projects or puzzles during those times might work too. I also take 1 hour a week for each child. We go to kindermusik class in Lockport. Mondays for Jack and Thursdays for MacKenna. I spent a lot of quality time with MacKenna when Jack slept. It kept her from feeling too jealous of her new brother. Now they are great friends and they miss each other when they are not together.

I hope some of this helps and good luck. It will be a lot more fun than not!

E.

Hi,

I am also a working mom of an almost 3 yo girl. Although I am not expecting at this time, I heard this advice from my friends who have more than one:

1. Make a wipe box for the baby with the older sibling that you help him/her decorate - when people come over they have to go to him/her to get the wipe and wash their hands before they pick up or touch the baby. This way the older child still gets attn
2. As far as juggling, my other friend says that the older one is like her helper. She emphasizes to her that she is a big sister which helps alot. She nursed her baby while the other one was running around still in diapers. She said that she would just try to explain to the older one about it and get them excited about playing with blocks or something until she was done.

Good luck! I'll probaby be in the same boat as you in the fall.

S.

Here's some advice I was given and really liked. My boys are 17 months apart.
1) Talk to the baby while your older child can hear and say things like "I'm going to put you down so I can have special time with your big brother."
2) Don't over protect the baby from the older child unless you think there is a real danger.
This advice came from a friend's pediatrician. Good luck!

Hi E. I just had a baby girl in April and my son at the time was a VERY energetic 2 1/2 y.o. It was very diffucult with my son becuase he wanted to be mean to my daughter all the time so I could not leave them alone for one minute or second..Then to make matters worse I breast fed my daughter (which i did not my son) so that was extremly painful and hard to do with Colin running around and then to add to all of that my daughter was allergic to my breast milk and was extremly colicky with blood in her stool...It was a very hard time for the first 8 weeks, but I would not take back a minute of any of it..And now 7 months later he is very protective over his sister and holds her and sings to her, but yes it takes a lot of getting use to when you add a new one to the mix, but I had a lot of support from my family that somehow you make it work...
If you need any more advice or need to talk please just email me I am actually on the border of New Lenox in Lockport..

I have 2 boys 13 months apart and another on the way... then I am SOO DONE!! I suggest using the sling to nurse if you are able to. I found that the older one tends to really step up and help out a lot!! I had my son getting diapers and all that. He liked being the big brother!! If you have your 3 yr old out of diapers and able to dress himself your life will be a lot easier!! I think you will be pleasantly surprised at how much help your older one can be if he has to!! Congratulations!!! You will get through it just like you did the first!! oh yes and if you can afford it... hire a maid whenever possible!!!