So i notified my attorney and our therapist we see. The attorney and I have just recently filed for a modification of custody so she said we will address it when we get the court date. We were proposing his visitation go from 50/50 (e/o wknd fri to mon and every tues and wed) to e/o wknd fri to mon and no weekday visits. But now we might change that to e/o sat with no overnights until he goes to counseling. But i have not had much luck with the court system so i am not optimistic. I have confronted dad about the last 2 incidents and he OF COURSE justifies everything he does and then turns the conversation into a blaming session...saying our daughter is attitudy and mean to everyone in the house. I say well your girlfriend as i am told isnt very nice to her etc..etc.. it just goes in circles when speaking to him. At first he says he only locked the kids in the basement for a minute, then its he locked them in there so his girlfriend and him could put xmas decorations away. Then i questioned him about the inappropriate behavior and he first said his girlfriend didnt touch him in his genitals, then says she hit him there. I said either way...whether she gestured towards your genitals or touched them...it should not be happening in front of your 9 yr old daughter!! So i am awaiting the court papers to see when our court date is. I just feel helpless...i have tried handling things the appropriate, legal way and it just seems as though i or should i say my children get screwed!
my daughter and I have been going to counseling since august and it is even court ordered and father has refused to go. This is another reason why i filed for the modification. I filed it before these last 2 incidents so this is now just extra that needs to be addressed. Thank you all
When someone tries to argue circles, just stop, and restate the issue again. Don't get locked into the bantering as that is why they are doing it, trying to distract from the real issue.
Also, document everything. Good luck!
I don't really have a response, other then, I really hope this somehow works out for you and your children. That whole situation just sounds terrible for any of you to be in right now. I also still think you should try to get the girlfriend away from your kids if she's gonna be acting that way (and that's saying a lot coming from me and my normal thoughts on girlfriends since I am one lol). Good luck though!
I would STILL call CPS. Get it documented! Not just w/ YOUR lawyer, but on outside, non-biased official. I'd also get your dd a cell phone to be used only at her dad's house. I would tell her if he did anything even similar to what he did this last time, call the police. Make sure you have that local dept programmed in and she knows his addres.
Write down dates and what happened. Video record your kids without asking leading questions. Maybe some counseling with you and your ex, and the kids seperate might help?
I'll be praying for you and your kids!
I so feel for you and your children. I hope it gets worked out so the dad gets little visitation until he matures (which I realize could never happen). The girlfriends child also needs help, hope that someone gets addressed through what you are doing.
I agree w/ Katie B. Have your lawyer put in paperwork that your children can only go around him IF his girlfriend is not present. Maybe then, CPS will look into his girlfriend for the safety of her own child.
I'm sorry you are going through all this, I hope it all works out in your favor!!
