Taking Paci Away

I haven't tried it yet but I've gotten a lot of advice to cut the ends and say they broke and let the kid throw them away. Might be the end of it.
Good Luck

Good morning. I don't know if this is a good or bad idea. But, my sister did this and it worked. She secretly cut the very tip off the pacifier, and then very gradually cut it away more and more over time until there was really nothing left for her son to hang on to. I think she did it gradually enough that my nephew let it go when there was nothing left. Good luck to you!

Do what is best for your family and your child. Your dr. can give advice, but she doesn't go home with you and live it. Your 2 year old will eventually give it up. One way I have seen success is to cut a little bit of it away every few days until it is no longer desirable or usable. Then the child loses interest and it is his decision to not use it. When they think it is their idea, then there is no power struggle. What is the motivation for taking it away? If other kids around him are still using it, it may be more challenging and beneficial to wait.
What does your gut tell you?
Good luck,
J.

All I can tell you is what we did and that it worked. It may not work for your little guy.

We only gave our daughter the paci for naps and bedtimes, too and found ourselves going in the middle of the night to help her find it so she could go back to sleep. She was 22 months when we decided to give the paci up.

We set a date that we would do it where we had an extra day to catch up on any lost sleep(Labor Day weekend).

We told her Friday night that we were done with the paci and that she was a big girl now. We did the regular bedtime routine and said goodnight. I told myself that I would give her 7 minutes to cry before I went back in. I watched the clock and then went in. I reminded her that she didn't need it and she was more upset that I came back in without it. I gave myself another 10 minutes to let her cry....and we didn't need it. By 8 minutes, she was asleep. She woke up a couple of times that night and I reminded her each time that she was a big girl and helped soothe her to sleep. The next day's nap was a little hard, but not as bad at the night before. That night's bedtime went much better and by Monday, she was over it.

There have been a few times that she has found a few pacifiers in the house or at a friends house and put them in her mouth. All we did was tell her she didn't need it and very nicely took it from her. She has responded very well to this.

Just remember, whatever method you start with, be consistent in the message, approach, and follow through. If I would have given in to give her the paci the first night after crying for 7 minutes, she would have learned that she just had to cry longer and louder next time to get what she wanted.

It is hard being a parent, but worth it! GOOD LUCK!

Quite frankly I wouldn't listen to the Dr. I would listen to you and your child. We didn't get rid of my daughter's paci until she just turned 3 and my son's when he was 2 1/2. What we did worked like a charm...the kids gave their paci's to Santa so he could give them to other babies that don't have pacis. We put them in their stocking on Christmas Eve and then they had that many "extra" stocking stuffers and a thank you note from Santa. It helped that a commercial played at Christmas every year of a bunch of sleeping babies and so I would tell the kids that those babies need pacis. My daughter cried a little that first night but it was over shadowed by Christmas excitement. My son had no problems at all. Both had been pretty attached to their paci's before this too. Neither were bothered by the fact that other kids around them still had their paci's because the kids don't see other paci's as THEIR paci's.

Our Dr never said anything about when to get rid of pacis but our dentist did because both of my children have a slight cross bite. However, other mom's I know (including my dental hygentist) that never used paci's have children that also have crossbites.

Do what's best for you but most important is to stick to your guns once the decision is made. Throw them away or poke holes in them so you can't be tempted to give him one. Good luck!

My son just turned 2 in November and I tried taking away his paci (which he used throughout the day if he needed comfort but not all day) cold turkey. I cut them and told him they were broken. I did this on the advice of several friends. However, after a month (yes, a MONTH) he was still struggling to get to sleep at nap time and bedtime and I was spending a lot of my free time trying to help him get to sleep. He also saw other kids at daycare with theirs and would say, "Evan's paci no brokens" and constantly talked about how his paci was "brokens". I honestly thought it would only take about a week for him to get over it, but I was clearly mistaken. I finally broke down and gave it back to him for sleep time only, asking him to hang his paci on a hook in his room after he got up thus ensuring that he wouldn't have it any other time. I feel as though he's going to have to give it up on his own terms. I've heard that giving it to another baby is good. Or leaving it for Santa or the Easter Bunny. Or possibly just asking him if he's ready to throw it away. I wish you luck!

I don't think there is anything wrong with naptime and bedtime. It soothes them and gives them security. It would be different if he used it all day long. My son gave his up on his 6th birthday. Some may seem that is extreme, but it didn't ruin his teeth and there were no tears.

I used a pacifier until during kindergarten -- I would leave it under my pillow every morning and run upstairs and get it after school. I turned out fine - as did my teeth - so I never worried about it that much with my kids.

My daughter used her "bobby" (no idea where the name came from) until she was about 4 - just at night. Ugh. What we did was the "Bobby Fairy." We talked a lot about the Bobby Fairy and told her that when a child was 4, she was a big girl and if she still used a bobby that the bobby fairy came in the middle of the night and took all the bobbys and left a gift. So, shortly after her 4th bday, we gathered all the bobbys and put them at the bottom of the stairs, "called for" the bobby fairy one night at bedtime (there was a dance involved- LOL) and when she woke up in the morning, there was a small gift and note from the Bobby Fairy. She was occasionally sad at night about it, but it was mostly fine.

Our dentist told us the same thing about our now-2 year old. But honestly, I'm not ready for the screaming at night yet that will happen and I'm not sure she's old enough to be excited about the bobby fairy yet.

At my daycare the rule was 18 months and NO MORE pacifier at my house. (One of my biggest pet peeves-still is- is when a big kid is walking around with a nuk in their mouth! And I really hate it when they are old enough to TALK with it in their mouth....... JUST MY OPINION!

There was only one child who had a hard time with that. BUT that was probably because the parents let her have it 24/7 at home.... She was still using it at home after she was 3! So, from time to time, she would sneak one with in a pocket and I'd catch her with it. I'd just take it away and tell her no more pacifier at daycare. You are a big girl here. And she'd forget about it till mom came.

Does he nap in a group room or are the kids in seperate rooms??? If they are seperated, it shouldn't be a big deal at all..... But even in my daycare when a younger one would have a pacifier and an 18 month old had just given up theirs, it wasn't a big deal. We just emphasized that the babies have nuks, not big kids.

So when our daughter turned 18 months and still LOVED her nuk, (I was no longer doing daycare), my parents took her overnight and just didn't give it to her. So when I picked her up the next day, that was it. She did not get it back at home either. So we went cold turkey. First couple nights she wanted it but after that, she didn't care.

Good luck.

Don't listen to your doctor, only do it if YOU think the time is right! There's no medical reason to do it this soon.

our daughter is also two and has the paci (well, three of them)at naps and bedtime only too. we are getting rid of them slowly. she had four until we spent the weekend at my parents and we 'lost' one. she understands we lost the white bink at nana and papas and is ok with it. there are two that are getting pretty icky- she doesn't even suck on them, just holds them and we've told her when they get to bad they have to be thrown away. my opinion is they aren't hurting her or anyone else, so let her keep them until they can no longer be used- just don't do any replaceing! hope this helps and best of luck!
~T. t. :)

This is your decision, not your doctor's. Do what feels right for you and your son. This is a small thing that gives him comfort when you are not there. He'll grow out of the need eventually.

I agree with the people who say there is no medical, dental, or social reason to give it up at this point. Every chilld is different and you know your child best. Just using it at sleep times is no big deal.

And be careful because taking it away too soon can lead to other soothing habits like sucking thumb (much harder habit to break later), chewing handds or fingernails, chewing clothes or buttons. My son had sensory processing issues nd used his paci a lot. He chose to give it up to the paci fairy before he turned 3 but I think that was too early because for another year and a half he had a strong need to chew and suck on things still to sooth himself so he started sucking his shirts (until I bought him a chewy stick from The Autism Shop).

Hi Danielle,
I was watching Nanny 911 one time and I saw a good method that I was thinking about trying (when the time comes). The parents decorated a basket and said it was the paci-fairy's and that she needed paci's to give to newborn babies. The kids put theirs in the basket and it was left on the fridge overnight. Then, in the morning, the paci-fairy had left the kids "big kid" toys in return. Maybe this will work for you? Good luck!
S.

man i am in your position, only worse. LOL my son has been chewing on his, and got big holes in the side part. this morning he got into my makeup and i made him throw his last one away. right now hes down for nap, but hes singing to himself in there LOL.

im sure the child care provider will handle it just fine. you just be confident about it, tell him that hes a big boy, that babies need suckers, and though hes your baby, he doesnt need the sucker anymore. if you are confident about it, he will be too. at least, i hope, because thats the route im taking! LOL

my son is just 2 months over 3 years though...LOL we are past time.

i guess the worst that can happen is he starts sucking his thumb. :P

I agree with Julian. We're having the same problem with our 21 month old. She wants it all the time. They're really strict at Day Care about only giving it to her when she's napping. Otherwise, it's off-limits.

We've been removing it more and more and more at home and really only letting her have it around nap/bedtime. She's not quite 2, so we're not that worried. If she still has it close to 3, we'll have an issue. Her 3.5 year old brother sucks his thumb at bedtime which has actually helped him with a dental issue.

I'll be checking back to see if you have any good advice we can use, too.

I had good luck with my 2-year-old using the cutting technique. I cut off the tip (without him seeing me) and he was very angry when he discovered it 'broken', but just chewed on it for a while and showed all this stuffed animals and our cat (it was actually quite entertaining to see him discuss his dilemna with our cat). By the end of the day he was willing to throw it away. It took him longer to fall asleep for a couple weeks, but he was okay.

I was expecting an epic battle over this and was so proud of him when he dealt with it so well. I hope everything goes well for you when you do decide the time is right.

Lots of good ideas!

We had a similar situation. Our son had always only used it only to sleep. We thought at 18 months, it might be time to make a plan to get rid of it. Tried cutting the tip, dipping in something that tasted "yucky", etc. He was not having it. :D

However when we talked to her pedtrcn about it at our 2 yr visit, he dismissed our concerns. To him, nighttime paci use was nothing to intervene with. He was right, when we mentioned it to Dylan a couple months later and said it was time to send his pacis back to the Paci Fairy so she could give them to little babies...He volunteered to decorate the envelope himself and tied it into a tree in the front yard.

Fast forward to his first dentist visit at 3 yrs...Dentist almost accuses Dylan of being a thumb sucker and tssked us and told us we really should make him stop. We told him the true story and he seemed baffled but pretty sure that nighttime paci use thru 26 months could NOT be the culprit for his slight overbite.

My son was very attached to his pacifier, too. We allowed him to keep it for naps and bed time only until he was almost 3. I had thought about taking it away earlier, but I figured since he only wanted when he needed comfort I could let him keep it until he could participate in letting it go.

I made sure I didn't buy any new ones and by the time he gave it up we only had one left. We told him about what was going to happen and talked about being a big boy and what that meant. We had planned on having him giving it away to a baby (symbolic), but one day we couldn't find it and kinda "oh well'd" it and after two days of minor fussing at nap/bed time it was over! he knew there was only one and it was (honest!) lost. Of course I found it a few days later and quietly disposed of it- LOL : )

Just do what's best for you son and you both will be fine. Weather you take it away completely or allow it for awhile at daycare he will be fine. Obviously, I don't think it's a big deal to keep it for awhile longer, but if you are uncomfortable with him having it you should work on letting it go. Does he have another special "lovey?" Maybe trade it out for a teddy or blanket or another soothing item.

Good Luck!

It is not up to your physician to tell you when to take the pacifier away, it is up to you. Only you know when is the best time for this transition. If you are under a lot of stress with work right now, or if your child is going through a developmental spurt or transition right now, then I would strongly recommend waiting!! Trust your own gut, and your child's ability to let you know (in his own way) when the time is right.

Danielle - your dr means well and you can definitely take your dr's advice. However, in my opinion, do what is best for you and your child. Both of my children have been (and one is still currently) pacifier users. I have 3 people in my family that are in the dentistry field. Yes, it's best if they never get accustomed to pacifiers but, in my case - it's been more of a blessing than not. My dtr has had no dental problems from it - and she used it until age 3. My son continues to use it at naps and bed. When we check on him at night - we take the paci out. If you can find a replacement (blankie, special toy) that seems to help when you get rid of it. But, I found that when we got rid of it with my dtr it was easiest when she could fully understand why. It was summer (right before the start of prek) and we had bunnies in our yard. We literally couldn't find her pacifier one evening - not one - we made up the story that the mother rabbit needed it for her babies. She felt so happy to have given her one and only pacifier up to them. It was very tough but we kept telling her how thankful they were. It went so much smoother than I thought it would. I plan to wait a little longer before we make the big change for my son - probably over the summer again b/c I see that it really helps keep his hands out of his mouth. As those 2 yr molars were coming through - he had his hands in his mouth (as a replacement) b/c they hurt so bad. I hate that b/c of germs and stuff. If your son has his molars in, I do think its easier to take the paci away. But, just do it when your child is ready - maybe when you're on vacation away from the daycare kids for a while, during the summer, give it to the Easter bunny to receive a special Easter basket of goodies, etc. I'd be worried about your son grabbing other kids paci's at the daycare - making it difficult there, with friends, and/or risking son of lots more germs. I've noticed I've been a bit more of a germaphob just b/c we've seemed to get a lot more of the colds/flu this year. We have a family member that has a compromised immune system so we have to be more careful. Good Luck!