Santa - Chagrin Falls,OH

It has always been my rule that if they ask I deny but if they tell I confirm. 2 years ago my now 12 y.o. son told me that he knew I was the tooth fairy. I confirmed. It was only a short leap for him to know that Dad and I were Santa & the Easter Bunny.

My now 10 y.o. old dtr does not let on either way so we still go on the assumption that everyone still exists for her. She was asking regularly when she was in 1st grade b/c another kid in her class ( a non-believer with a different religious upbringing) was taking it upon herself to tell everyone the truth. I wasn't ready to let it go just yet so I asked her what she thought and she quickly replied that there is no way her Dad and I would ever buy all those presents for her and her brother - it had to be Santa. An so....the dream lived on.

A friend of mines oldest was on the fence this year about Santa. I had her send a video email from Santa and he's a true believer again. Here's the website if you interested, it's totally free and really cool www.portablenorthpole.tv

so TB's advice is "you should never have LIED TO HER and told her santa was real to begin with". i sure would love to see ONE post on this site where a mom didn't jump up and judge the questioner just to make themselves feel superior.

look, this is a precious and wonderous part of all of our childhoods (ok 99% of them). does every kid who believed in santa become scarred for life when they learn "the truth"?? NO!

i had three younger siblings and i caught on gradually. i did NOT have to spend years in therapy. in fact, i never let on that i knew. i kept the magic alive for my sibs and my mom.

i think if she is old enough to be told, spin a tale about how the christmas spirit lives in each of us and how santa represents that. mine is only four so i know some of the more experienced moms on here can tell you better ways. but no way should you feel guilty for letting her believe.

We ought to make a count of how many mamas have asked this question this season! :^)

My children knew pretty early that Santa wasn't quite the character he was made out to be. And yet the Fat Man in the Red Suit (the name is from Russell and Lillian Hoban's THE MOLE FAMILY'S CHRISTMAS) visited our house for years and years. I still rather miss him.

I told my kids about the real St. Nicholas of ages ago, who had such a heart for people in need that (among other things) he gave them gifts without letting them know it was he who gave them.

In the same spirit, today's Santa is sort of a game that we play to surprise people we love. If she's old enough to know this about Santa, she's old enough to help play Santa and put things in other people's stockings - she could even help put together a surprise stocking for Grandma and Grandpa! And won't they be surprised! BUT... she MUST keep the secret faithfully and not spoil anybody else's happiness!

let her have one more year. they know but like the idea of santa even after they know mine was 8 when he figured it out but santa still visited till about 12 :) he finally told me mom I know santa isnt real. :)

as for tbs answer santa visited me at my dad house till the day he died. :) and santa leaves things in my 21, 20 and 19 yr old boys stockings. :) so the lie continues. :) but they enjoy it so what is the harm. I wonder if they know the truth????? and my older boys understand that santa is more for the kids so they get an equal amount spent but the 2 yr old gets more his is cheaper and that is the fun of being a kid. all of my older boys understand and have no problem with it.

the older boys always get a lump of coal in their stocking from santa too that is why the baby gets santa presents and the older brothers dont they were bad. and dad gets his lump of coal everyyear too. :)

My children are only 3 and 1, but when I get asked if Santa is real, I am going to say "yes." He is real. The spirit of Christmas is as real as it gets. I mean, seriously, when else does the majority of people do the exact same thing on the exact same day? Not even the Super bowl gets such a turn-out!

There is no news to break, she is just now old enough for the rest of the story.

"Breaking the news." Just that phrase alone sounds so sad...which is why I never endorsed santa, nor have I ever encouraged my children to believe. When my sister found out there was no santa, she was devastated. The way I see it, our children look up to us and they expect us to be truthful. I could no way ever lie to my children for years...all to end it all "breaking the news" one day. Tell her the truth.

We have six adult children and 11 grandchildren...I believe in Santa Claus and I never told my children anything different than that....how he does his job, we never discussed it....we all keep our belief because that is part of the magic of Christmas. I help my children keep the magic alive as best I can...and we will go on doing so forever if we can. So, if you wat to keep the magic alive, you can,.....there never has to be any shattering of a child's dream, or an adult's, fo that matter. Santa wil continue to put a few thing in the stockings at our house as long as I am alive anyway.
Our 9 year old Granddaughter asked her mother the other day about it and her mother said, "Do you want to believe in Santa?" and she replied "yes".
So we won't be telling her anything different.....kids figure it out on their own
eventually, but if is your family's tradition, you can keep it that way, and the older kids enjoy keeping it up for the younger ones too.
So enjoy......I wish you the best!

Ahhh Yes to lie or not to lie!! A lot of counertys around the world have some take on Santa. When we lived in Italy they would leave ther shoes out side the door and an old lady (She has a name but it slips my mind at the moment) would leave little gifts in them.
It is my understanding (and I could be wrong) is based of Sant Nick, who was a real person. SO there is some truth in the lie. I Agree with Denise let it go one more year. After you can explain about Santa. This is probley my Sons Last year with Santa as well. He has grown so fast!! However I still plain on giving him Santa gifts for a few reasons. 1- his sister is 2 years old and we still have a ways to go there and 2- Santa still leaves me gifts at my mothers house and I a way old enough to know that Santa as a person isnt real.
If your DD has a younger sibling maybe next year she can help be Santa and leave the gifts out to the little one. If she is the baby or the only child, next year she can write a list out for the mommy and daddy cluse!!
When ever you tell her about Santa rember to tell here at schoo and on the buss mum is the word because you dont know what the othere kids know!
Blessings Sweety!!!

I have sorta side stepped telling that there is no Santa by having a rule in our house of "if you believe you will receive" my oldest is not good at keeping secrets and she has been on the fence for a couple of years.
I tell her our rule when she asks or hints around that there may be no Santa, and remind her she has younger siblings.

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Is say tell the truth. You do not have to deny or confirm the present day santa. We have always told the true story of saint nicholas.

Santa is real - get the book "The Flight of the Reindeer".
Let her read it and then decide.
My son got that book from Santa one year.
YMMV
LBC

I can't answer when, but my family tells the kids the story of how he got started and that Santa lives in all of us. He lives in our hearts. I can't remember exactly how it goes, but i hope this helps.

The best answer I have heard for this is to turn around and ask them what they thing.

That way, if they want to beleive, they can, if they don't, wel...

We didn't want our children to be the ones that were laughed at for still believing in Santa when they were older. So after Christmas during their third grade year, we told them about Santa. For our oldest, all my husband had to do was ask her if she thought about how Santa got all those gifts delivered in one night. It was an easy leap from there. Before that, when my kids asked me if I believed in Santa, I would talk about yes, I believe in the Spirit of Christmas, and Santa is the Spirit of Christmas. There comes a time when if your child questions it, instead of hedging, you lead them to the correct answer. I do remember asking my dad if there was a Santa. I was asking because they were talking about it at school. I was shocked and heartbroken when he said no. He must have seen the look on my face because he immediately said "you knew that, right?" I of course said yes, I knew, but I didn't and will never forget how I felt. On the other hand, my children have never felt lied to when they found out the truth. As the oldest finds out, she is sworn to secrecy to keep the fun for their younger sib. It worked for us.