Nap Time - Richmond, TX

My daughter stoped sleeping 5 hrs at 2 mos old. She was a finicky sleeper to. The only thing that worked was swaddling her. You know where you wrap them up very tight in a blanket. My doctor said it makes them feel like they are in the womb again. When that didn't work she would always fall asleep in her swing. Good luck!

I understand your frustration - hang in there! My boys are soon to turn 2 and 4, and they are really good at getting themselves to sleep now. I read often about letting them cry it out and though I know it is successful for some, I just couldn't do it. Everything I read (and felt) said that until they are a little older, crying is a sign of stress and I was the person who was supposed to ease that. I also heard/read that it's important to try to let them get to sleep without having to rock them all the way to sleep first (although I had to use the swing and rocking chair sometimes, too!), so that they will be able to lay down and fall asleep on their own later. I think once you get big signs that they are tired, they are past the point that they can soothe themselves - so try to find their signals for tiredness so that they would be going to sleep about 30 minutes before that. I put both boys into a bed or cradle very early, usually on or with a blanket (a little "blankie square") that I had held (and smelled like me!) and rubbed or patted them until they got very sleepy (eyelids dragging to close). Then I was very quiet and just watched them fall asleep - it took a long time at first (like 20 minutes of patting until my arm was very tired), but gradually got very short. You'll know they're truly "out" when their breathing changes and they take longer, slower breaths. Before long I could lay them in their beds awake and leave the room. With our first son, we let him sleep in the living room in the cradle (when he was very small-newborn) with a lamp on and the TV on low (and noises I made doing things around him) so that he could sleep through some noise. But our second son was in his room (otherwise there was a toddler crawling on him), so he had trouble sleeping through the night. . .but we bought a CD of ocean waves, and that helps him sleep all the way through. It's different with each kid. I hope something works for you. Good luck!

Hi M. I understand what you are going threw my daughter is 2 1/2 and still fights her sleep. I also have a 4 1/2 month old son. Try putting him in a swing, try running the vacuum cleaner I know that sounds funny or even the shower. The constant humming noises work sometimes. And you can try driving around in your car. I have drove around for hours just so my kids can get a nap. Also try not to hold him so much during the day I know that can be hard since we all love to hold are lil ones. You can even try a bouncer. When I go to lay my son down and I think he is going to wake up.....I pat he's chest until he falls back to sleep. Well hope some of this advice has worked for you. Good Luck!!!!

Not all 6.5mos olds can put themselves to sleep. IMO none do. The only ones that I know personally were left to CIO, which I cringe at. Crying is his only way to communicate right now. The thought of CIO with a limited or non-verbal child (however vocal they may be) -- breaks my heart. Their chief form of communication is crying. I am of the firm belief that babies and small children do not manipulate. I believe they simply don't know how. They know what they want and how they feel, even if they can't label it yet.
What I did with mine was nurse them to sleep. If they didn't want to nurse, then wearing them in a sling and just walking seems to do the trick. Some may argue that if you do that now that he will learn to only sleep that way. What rubbish. I myself did this and have many friends all over the US, not just in "hippie Austin", who have done this too. There are many ways to get your child to fall asleep without having to leave them to cry and feel abandoned.
This may sound outrageous to some, but my response is 'so what' - they grow up so fast. Why speed up the process?

Also, there is likely a LLL group or API group in your area
http://www.attachmentparenting.org/group/webtx.shtml
http://www.llli.org//Web/Texas.html
Those are two other really good resources for parenting tips and ideas.

HTH and congratulations on your marriage and baby boy!

K. H, mama to
Catherine, 4yrs and
Samuel, 13mos

Hi M.,
Neither one of my child would just go to sleep in their beds, at your son's age. My daughter who is now 4, had to basicly be tricked. We would hold her in the living room with the TV on until she fell asleep. This usually didn't take very long. We had to do this until she was about 18 months. My son, on the other hand, we only held until about 9 months; then he wanted to be put in his crib with his blanket to go to sleep. Both my children took a morning nap & afternoon nap until they were about 1 yr, even my daughter who doesn't like to sleep. I hope this helps. Good luck!

Dear M.,
My heart goes out to you as well as my prayers! It's hard finding what will work to help your child to rest. I had 4 children stair stepped in age from 5, 4, 3, and 10 months. I worked hard at getting all my children to take a nap at the same time. That was the only way I had any time for my self which I needed to keep sane! The older ones I would pat, talk to like they were already sleeping about how they were going to be rewarded later when they woke up and used baby swings and sing to them too! My baby is now 30 and still to this day if soft music is playing while she is laying down she falls asleep with no problem! My children tell me how hard they used to fight sleep, but with me in there talking and singing that they couldn't resist going to sleep! The funny thing they have told me if they are having a bad moment and know they can't reach me they call my phone just to hear my voice on the answering machine! I reckon I did alright by them.
Have a great day! Hope this helps you in some way! I have 8 children living and 31 grand children.
There are some neat Christian lullabys you could play to help keep your sweet child calm! Let me know how things go for you!
LOL in JESUS,
Sheryl J.

I feel your pain! I have an extremely active and curious 7 month old who also fights sleep. When she starts to get sleepy during the day (eye rubbing, yawning), I turn lights down low, turn off tv and walk around with her to calm her down. Then I nurse her off to dreamland. I have tried to let her fall asleep on her own, but she rarely can do it - she is just too excited about all the things she is learning to do, like babbling and standing up in her crib. I have resigned myself that she will never be the kind of baby that falls asleep eating in her high chair! And the amount she gets during the day varies depending on how the night went or the day's activities. Sometimes she will sleep a total of 4 hours, sometimes just one. How much sleep does your baby get at night? If he is getting 12 hours, he may only need one to two hours of sleep in the day. An average amount of sleep a baby that age needs is about 14, but some babies need less. A good way to see if he needs more is if he is acting cranky a lot. Good luck in your napping, and if you find any great solutions, please let me know!

While I respect those who don't want to let their babies cry to sleep because they don't want the baby to feel abandoned, (or even just because it breaks their own heart!) I feel confident that my babies did not feel that way. When you are consistent about how you handle sleep time, it only takes a few times of "crying it out" in order for the baby to get used to falling asleep on his own. After that, naptime and bedtime are peaceful, enjoyable times rather than battles. And I'm not talking about him battling you, although that may happen when he is older if he doesn't know how to go to sleep on his own. I'm talking about him battling sleep. After our good-night song and hugs and kisses, my babies would sometimes reach for their crib. Consistency is key, though, especially in a bedtime-naptime routine. An enjoyable, almost inflexible routine helps him (or anyone, sleep experts say) prepare for sleep. If you vary the routine, a child will fight the final step of actually lying down to sleep. (One more story, another drink, go potty again, etc. ad infinitum)

Here is a routine for a six-month-old: Baby yawns, fusses, or rubs eyes. "You're sleepy, aren't you? Let's go get your blankie." Pick out a short board book. Cuddle together and read it. "Time to go night-night!" (Say firmly but very positively, as if this is a wonderful thing he is going to do.) Walk to crib. Stand in front of crib cuddling and singing a song (same one every time!). Lay him down in crib with one last kiss. "I love you, baby!" Walk directly out of the room and almost close the door. (I like to be able to see in without being seen.)

A big part of this working over the long haul is your confidence that you know better than he does when he needs to sleep. If you waver, he will doubt that it is really time for bed.

Also, watch for signs that he is getting sleepy, and do the routine before he's about to fall asleep. If you wait till he's about to fall asleep, then he is overtired and you've actually interrupted the falling-asleep process and he has to start over.

The Healthy Sleep Habits book will have lots of other good stuff in it. One last thing, though: beware of "the books" and magazines in general. (And us advice-givers!) We don't know your baby, but you do! If YOU think he needs to nap more because a book helped you see that he is cranky or falls asleep in his high chair, then you need to do something, but not just because a book said so. Enjoy those baby cuddles for me - I miss them!

Sometimes a baby has a hard time relaxing and he just needs a little bit of reassurance from his mother. Pick him up, rock him, sing to him, read to him (babies love to hear their mother's voice) love him, and just enjoy that baby in your arms. He'll feel safe and secure and will relax! Enjoy him because he will grow up so fast! You can never rock and hold a little baby too much! As they get older, they don't always nap as long as they did when they were newborns, either. Once he's alseep, enjoy the peace and quiet. If he falls asleep while you're rocking him, maybe you can take a few moments to relax as well! I'm sure your housework is "calling" to you, but believe me, it will wait, babies won't! Blessings from a mom who's been there!!

I was given two great books that deal with sleep issues and related topics. If you can, pick up copies of Babywise and Healthy Sleep Habits; Healthy Child. Both, but especially Healthy Sleep Habits have excellent advice and give you real strategies for dealing with sleep issues. Every time I have encountered an issue, I have followed the advice of these books and it has worked. Good Luck!