Help!! This Is a Nightmare for Me!!

The girls mother does not realize, making your son off limits has peaked this girls interest.. He has become, Forbidden fruit.

I would mention it to the teacher so she can keep an eye on the situation.. Once she witnesses this behavior, the teacher can speak with the girl and her mother.

Our daughter and a friend were called "Bitches" on the track in first grade by a little boy.. We of course were very upset and let the school handle it. Once he apologized and we heard the punishments, we let it go, because we figured it was a 1 time deal.

That young man is really a wonderful respectful young man. In college married and a devout Christian.. He was just a little boy at the time and not meaning to be malicious.

There probably isn't anything you can do about the other mom. Plain and simple.
Are they in the same class again this year? Maybe request that next year they be placed in different classrooms.
The reality is that the girl's mom is NEVER going to forget that incident. I couldn't forget it. Not that I would still hold a grudge about it, or be over the top paranoid about it, but it would stick in my memory bank, for sure. But, yeah... it sounds like the mom is a little over the top....
Sorry, wish I had some great solution, but I don't know that there is one, unless one or the other of your families was about to move....

One thing that does occur to me though depends upon whether or not you have any speaking relationship with the other mom. Do you? We had an issue a while back with our son (when he was just turned 12) and his friend at church (girl, same age). They are great pals (along with our younger daughter who is 3 yrs behind them) and goof around like brother/sisters. Prank each other---pushing/pulling etc. Innocent behavior, but they are getting older it was fairly physical (grabbing arms, pushing faces into the water fountain, etc)...
I didn't "get" it, until I had a long long discussion with my husband about it. It is TOTALLY unfair to our son (or ANY boy, like your son) for this behavior to continue. Why? Because the rules are different for boys than for girls. Girls can push and shove a boy and nobody thinks much of it, but if a boy does the exact same thing to a girl, he is being a bully or too aggressive or whatever. Our kids were at the ages where (you will be able to relate to this) if the girl mistook anything he did (maybe she goes to shove her and she turns and his hand goes somewhere it shouldn't on accident) that HE could look like it was some sort of sexual thing. Giving him a BAD rep and possibly (as he ages) liable for some sort of prosecution or labeling.
I grew up with the whole "tomboy" mentality. Whatever my brothers could do, I could do, too. I competed with them. Intentionally. I thought that I could relate to boys that way b/c I related to my brothers that way, and thought nothing of it. Still didn't, until my husband and I had this conversation. The reality for the BOYS is much different. It is NOT a level playing field. Their hands are tied, so to speak. As you are seeing play out with this little girl approaching your son... If he TOUCHES her, he's instantly the bad guy. But she can do stuff to him and nobody will bat an eye. Right?
If you have a decent speaking relationship with the mom, maybe you could have a conversation with her about it. Or maybe your husband and the girl's dad could chat (only if it could happen in a friendly conversation).
We talked with the girl's mom, and she TOTALLY "got" it and we stopped allowing the kids to "touch" each other. Nothing physical--hands kept to themselves. We just had to change the nature of their interaction so that down the road, no one gets hurt. It was very hard for me to grasp this at first, but I think men instinctively do, because they LIVE it. Which is why I mention the dads talking.
Just an added thought...

On the other side of this, my daughter was somewhat bullied by a child in first grade, where he would do things to my daughter that was just mean. He pulled her hair, pushed her books, talked to her in class so she would get in trouble. I had a talk with my daughter about how to handle it, and talked with the teacher, and they separated them which helped, and they seem to be put in the same class every year. I have talked to each teacher to make sure they were separated and this year again I went into the teacher and she put me in my place.

She had told me that it happened 2 years ago, basically get over it. If there are issues between them I will handle it, just make sure she tells me when something happens. At first I was pissed that she talked to me like that, and disregarded my feelings, but there have been no issues between them and my daughter tells me he is much better this year. I guess I needed a good talking to about letting something go when the kid was only 6 at the time. I just wanted to protect my child from being bullied, but I took it too far and didn't let it go.

I am sure that is how the other mom feels as well. I don't know if there is a way you can talk to the mom and let her know all the steps you took and that you are very sorry this happened, but I think it would go a long way.

I do think it sounds like the girl may have a crush on your son or is messing with her mother because she keeps coming around, and the mother reacts so much to her behavior.Tell your son to stay away from the girl for his own well-being and reputation. You can't change this woman's perspective of what happened, or her personal feelings and opinions about your son and your family. But you and your family can avoid them. Unfortunately, what he did was pretty bad (the pants incident), and very few parents are going to be lax about something like this. Hopefully with time, people with forget and move on and he'll never do anything like that again.

If things get really bad, such as she's bad rapping (hurting his reputation to the point it's affecting his schooling or is spreading rumors about your son and family with unfounded claims, you can go to school officials about it and hopefully they'll take action....as this is a form of bullying.

Otherwise, find a new school and get a fresh start. It doesn't sound like things will escalate that far. But if it does, that may be the best recourse.

Can you get a school counsel or principal to talk to this mother ? it sounds like she is teaching her child she is a victim. and she may be making your son forbidden fruit as someone else said, I hope a neutral party can talk some sense into this woman.

OK--first of all....you post is confusing--sentence fragments and unfinished sentences so I'm sorry if I'm not "getting" it all...
("he is the you gear and all his siblings are girls" ? "the little girl kept co
Ing around him and his friends" ?)

He did something wrong. Undeniably. You see that. What he can do is to show the fact that he now knows to keep his hands to himself. If the little girl and her sheep friends have not forgotten about it and let it go--there's nothing you can do about that.

Just make sure your son understands why it is NOT OK to stick his hands down ANYONE's pants!

Most likely no O. else remembers this or judges your son for it. You need to forget about it too.

As for the kiss--that's just sweet. I got my first kiss (on the cheek) in K and it's sad the world is SO politically correct that this warranted a call from the principal!

I think this other mom is taking this a little far, yes she is trying to protect her child but she does not know all the steps you have taken to make sure your son knows that what he did was inappropriate.

You can not do much to change this other mom's actions. If I was that mom (which I kind of am, my daughter has been kissed once in preschool and once in kindergarten) but I put an end to it with teaching her that I know you care for that other person BUT that is inappropriate, you may hug or give high fives. I talked with the boy's mom, we talk almost every school day so I felt comfortable (kind of) bring it up, and to my surprise she said that she knew about and told her son pretty much the same thing I told my daughter (they both hang out a lot still but nothing else has happened). BOTH kids should be taught how to handle it not just one while the other is told to 'stay away' even though nothing has ever happened again. I am on the fence if I would express the steps what you and your son has taken to show that you have addressed the issue... part of me wants to stick up for my child while the other part of me says that this other mom is not going to change her mind so why bother.

I would keep building up your child as a confident smart boy who is respectful to you and others.

Yes, she's blowing it way out of proportion. The sad thing is that you never know what will spark a sore spot with parents. For all you know, the mother was touched inappropriately as a child.

I wouldn't continue to discuss the issue at all. He's over it and nothing has happened since. If that mother would like to keep dragging it up to her daughters, there isn't much you can do about it. The good thing is that most people didn't know about it to start out with and those who did have long since forgotten.

Just keep reminding all of your children about "appropriate" touching and leave it at that!

I feel bad for you and your son having to go through this. I can understand the girls mom being concerned, but the kids are only 6!!! We as adults are reading in a whole lot more into these situatons than what really exists. They see mom and dad kiss and so they tried a kiss... not a big deal! We are the ones that make it a sexual problem, not the children. I think that is total overreacting and a sign of our overly politically correct times that a pricipal would need to get involved in a kindergarten kiss. good grief! The hand down the back of the pants would be very concerning to me IF they were older kids or if it was a repetitive behaviour. Sounds like you did all the right things to be sure it was not a bigger problem, and the girls mom needs to let it go. I wonder how she would feel if her daughter made a mistake one day and then some other crazy mom treated her like a bad kid and held it against her for over a year. I would agree that it is probably somewhat damaging to her girls to have her make such a big deal out of this. If you are able to talk to the mom about this and clear the air that is great, but judging on her over the top behavior she might not be too receptive. Probably best to ingore the entire situation unless your son is noticing it. If he notices it I would make sure he knows that you understand that while that 1 incident of behaviour was not good, HE is is a good boy and that you are not mad and that sometimes people react in strange ways that that it is not his fault.

Well, she clearly feels like your child is a threat to hers. It doesn't sound like you know the Mom really well, so she probably doesn't know the things that you did after the "incident" to ensure that there wasn't a problem with your son. Kudos to you for being so proactive about it. Your child probably wouldn't do anything to her daughter, but there is no way for her to know that. It is her responsibility to protect her child. Can you imagine if something were to happen to her daughter, and she did nothing to prevent it knowing that there had been a prior indication of an issue? In her position and not knowing you as the son's mother, you can bet I would be keeping both my eyes on the kids. Yes, probably an overeaction, but you can't change how this woman feels....

Sounds to me like the other mom has an agenda.

The incident was addressed, case closed but she refuses to close it.

Was your son wrong? From what you described... Yes BUT the incident was addressed and handled professionally.

I believe this mom is planning to makes your son "Pay" and if she is slandering your son to others then she is in the wrong.

You can choose to be a victim and benefit from it or you can choose to do the right thing and ....... Success is the best revenge

If she's teaching her kid this early to play on being "victim" shame on her. This tactic does not work in the real world.

To me it sounds completely innocent. While its not proper for kids to touch eachother like that, I have no doubt that its all about your son still learing proper social behavior and boundaries....He sounds very normal and if I was the mother in that situation I wouldn't freak out on you however, I would want to make sure it didn't keep happening.

It does sound like the girl wants your son's attention. If her mother doesn't want her daughter around your son then she needs to step up and be more proactive about it. Let your son be who he is. If the mother continues I would see if they can switch classes. I agree with the other mom that I wouldn't forget the incident but I certainly wouldn't hold it against your son if it was an isolated incident.

You can't change how that woman is 'protecting' her daughter.
They don't like your son now... and for that reason.
He put his hands down her pants.

I have a daughter. If a boy did that to her, I would also explain to her to stay away from that boy. AND though, my daughter speaks up. She would have told your son, back off.

Sure at 6 years old, the kids were probably just goofing around.
Still. Now that other Mom does not like your son. Because of what he did.
Her daughter, is being a child and does not understand these things... in an adult manner or as a parent would. They don't understand why things like this are a big deal or not.
They are 6 years old.

Well so it happened a year ago.
That Mom is doing what she feels is best.
That is her right.
They don't know your family or that your son has sisters and that he went to counseling.
She is being, a Mom. A Mama Bear.
They don't have to like your son.
And now the Mom has a reason to stay away from your son and her daughter too.

She is not 'punishing' your son.
She is protecting her daughter.
But eventually, in school a Parent has to realize they cannot control everything nor all kids.
But so on her end, she has to teach and guide and educate her daughter... on appropriate/inappropriate behavior, and how to handle it & social situations, and report it etc. She has a daughter.

Not all kids will be liked by other kids or parents.
Whether there is a reason or not.
And a child has to learn... that what they do... IMPACTS others, and other peoples impression... of them. Now and later.