My daughter is about to turn 19 months. Lately if we ask her something all she says is "NO". I don't know if this is a phase or what. We have tried to change our choice of words when she does something she is not suppose to do, ie. don't do that, stop. But nothing seems to work. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to deal with this or is this a phase and should we just let it blow over?
I just wanted to thank everyone for all of their comments in regard to my question. I pretty much thought that it was in fact just a phase, but I wanted other peoples opinions. There are times when I'm not even talking to her and she will just start saying no, ie. while watching tv, or driving in the car, or if I give her food b/c she is hungry and she does not want it she says no b/c she wants something else. I have noticed though that over the past few days, she has definately cut down on the amount she says "No". Geez... I can't wait for the next phase! Thank You again! :)
Yes, they absolutely do and it will stop. They'll still say no on occasion but it won't be to every single thing that you say. Right now, it's fun for them and they use it every chance they get!
From the time they learn the word til they find a new way to show you attitude my son is almost 3 and still says no to me most of the time
I was told that all children will learn "no" no matter how you choose your words, and all will go through a phase where they will tell you "no" no matter what it is. They are just asserting their independence and testing the waters for reactions from us parents. My son is 21 months and doesn't have a large vocabulary, so he say the word 'no' yet. But when he was you daughter's age he went through this phase where he shook his head no for everything. If we would ask him anything that sounded like a question he would shake his head 'no'. The worst part was that half the time he really didn't mean it, because he would "tell" us no and then get mad because we didn't give him it. It only lasted about a month or so. I'm worried he may go through that phase again when he actually learns to say the word 'no'. Good Luck with your little independent one!
Hi M.! It' probably a phrase that will not last much longer. One thing I said when my daughter was going through that was saying "oh thank you" as I took the object away or moved her away. I left the no for very serious things and usually said "no thank you". It taught her manners also.
S.
M.,
My daughter is 2 1/2 and my son is 1 year. I read something when my daughter was preverbal about the "no phase". Most kids use it because it's easy to say and obviously has some kind of power over their parent. it suggested using "uh uh" instead of no because it is a harder sound to replicate. When you want her to stop doing something be specific telling her to stop an action and give her an action she can do. Save the "NO!" for big stuff and it will mean more in the long run. I was lucky and Irene went through a "yeah" phase first rather than "no" all the time. I'm trying to do the same with my son, but it's a little more difficult because he hears me reprimand Irene as well as trying to direct him.
Be consistent and give it some time (a couple months) and the tide will turn. It's all about repitition when they are this age. Good Luck.
if you think back M., how many times since she started crawling have you told her "no"? now she can speak for herself, and is going to repeat all that she has heard. don't worry it doesnt last...well too long. next she will move on to a new word, and repeat that one all the time. its a circle that just keeps moving around. have patience, and remember... it will stop.
Yes, it pretty much is just a phase, and probably won't last much longer. However, instead of saying things like "don't do that" try something along the lines of "play with this instead of that". I have found that at this age silly disapline works well.
Well children mimic us as parents. So if we are constantly saying no (which at this age, you probably are), she will do the same in return. I would suggest whenever you tell her no, give her something that is a yes. Such as, no, she can not play with something you do not want her playing with, BUT, give her something she CAN play with. NO she cannot pull the cat by the tail, but YES, she can sit nicely and pet the cat. Maybe even as adults, if there is something you do not agree with, give an alternative to your spouse or visa versa. Make a conscious effort to do this in front of your daughter. You are about to enter the 'terrible twos' soon, but I never looked at it that way. It was the wonder years, they are so inquisitive. Good luck, things WILL work out. Promise.
YES! My son, who turned 2 in May, went through this phase for over a month! I did as you did- changed how I phrased things, and it helped. Now he is repeating LOTS of different things, and rarely ever says no. One thing you have to remember is that she doesn't know what no means. My son was so bad at one point that I had asked him if he wanted ice cream (his fav thing EVER) and he said no just to say it. To teach him what he was saying, I didn't give him the ice cream even though he wanted it. He said no, and I wanted him to know what saying no meant. He learned. Your daughter will, too. Good luck and God Bless.
