Last week my husband's ex-wife posted on Facebook a picture of him from about 25 years ago. In her limited comments, it was obvious that she was making fun of how he looked. She is not FB friends with him or me. She did not tag him or his sons or anybody else. It appears that she took a picture of a picture with her phone and uploaded it like that.
Somebody told me that there was a bit of a buzz ("Why did she do that? What is she trying to do?") surrounding it. I asked my husband if he knows about some inside joke, and he said no. We dropped it.
I'm not concerned and haven't been talking about it, but it just occurred to me again, and I wanted to know what others might think. We saw her at a party the weekend before and were pleasant and conversational. She has been known to do certain things just to stir the pot. I understand that there could be a hundred reasons she did it, so I would make myself crazy trying to figure it out. I assure you that I am not stressing over it. I'm just curious about what others would think. (Nobody's really saying anything because no one wants to be the one to make it an issue. People are curious, though...keep checking to see if others are commenting.)
That's funny. Okay, I'm done. (No, I have not been checking. And I really am not concerned. It just popped into my head again just now, and I thought that I'd see if outside people would find it odd.)
She is a pot stirrer.
So what.
Treat her like a whatever, and she will be a whatever.
She will only be of significance, if people let her.
And that is what she thrives, on.
No point in trying to psychoanalyze her.
What a waste of time.
I don't get it. Why is this some big mystery? Old photos can be funny. It is a part of her distant past, maybe she felt like sharing. I posted an old picture of my Dad & uncle the other day from their early 20s. I didn't mean anything by it, I just thought it was interesting. Why are you reading so much into it?
My ex is dead and I still post pics of him now and then, and so does the rest of the family.
FB is a place where you share stuff... do we actually have to have a motive?
Usually we share to laugh .... I suppose some people share to be mean... I have never done that. If I share a crazy picture it's only because I KNOW (or assume) that everyone else will think it hilarious too.
Social networking is what it is.
If you cant handle the fire then you best get out of the kitchen or put on some heavy duty oven mitts as I do not think it's going to go away.
If your husband dressed anything like my dad did, my husband did, or I did 25 years ago....it was pretty hilarious!!
I bet it was just something like that.
L.
I would continue to ignore it and go with your instinct that she's trying to stir the pot. If anything, it makes HER look odd. If someone asks you about it, just say "yeah, how strange of her to post that pic" and change the subject.
You answered your own question, Heather. She did it to stir the pot (and be catty.) Yeah, she might be conversational and pleasant when she sees him, but she's still "stickin' it to him" after the divorce, isn't she!
The fact that people are curious and there's a buzz about it reflects only on her. By just shaking your head and rolling your eyes, it continues to only reflect on her.
And by the way, it's perfectly okay for it to bother you. She was ugly to YOUR husband and it's okay to feel for HIM here. Ignore people who fuss at you for thinking about it or being bothered by it. It isn't their place. And I daresay that if it were THEIR husband the ex-wife had done this to, they'd have something to say about it.
Dawn
I vote further pot stirring. People are creatures of habit and tend to stick to their basic motivators which for her seems to be attention seeking and/or a feeling of superiority.
Don't put energy there. At all. Non issue.
You think she's doing it to "stir the pot." Looks like she succeeded. You're trying to figure out her motive and what other people think about it, etc. Consider pot stirred.
After your SWH. No, I don't consider it odd.
Well, it certainly keeps you all thinking/talking about her.
She might as well walk through a party buck naked and dare people to say anything to her about it - it amount to the same thing.
Just think of her as an old passed over bit of fruit cake.
She's really not worth noticing at all.
Sounds like her hurt from her previous marriage runs deep, and that at some level she's still not over it. Like when someone you loved died 20 years ago, but you still get a stab of pain about it occasionally.
If one of my fb friends posted a picture of there ex and was making fun of the way they looked I would think they were an idiot. They were good enough for them once upon a time why are they making fun of them now? Its pittiful and I would most likely either ignore it or delete her from face book.
I find that in most cases if a person feels badly about themselves they try to put others down to feel above them?!?!?! I say this action she has done is pittiful.
???????????
"SOMEBODY" told you....????
What people are curious?
You said she's known to stir the pot.
You said you are not stressed out about it just curious.
You said you'd make yourself crazy trying to figure it out.
This is all confusing. When one is curious, that's just another word for "it's irking me and I wanna get to the bottom of it".
Who cares. Let it go, she's probably looking to push your buttons and it's working. Don't concern yourself with her nonsense. Is your husband upset at some 25 year old picture?
