2Yr Old Visiting Family in ICU

Updated on May 10, 2008
S.E. asks from Bozeman, MT
10 answers

My mother is in the ICU recovering from complications from surgery. We had planned on going to visit her tomorrow, but are now wondering if he should be involved. We are worried that the ICU, with all the machines and tubes and such, will be too much and scare him. He was fine visiting her in the regular hospital room. Does anyone have any suggestions or experience with this?

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K.D.

answers from Denver on

My almost 2yo was actually put in ICU when we were traveling and the hospital did not have another bed for him. It did not scare him to see the others. It would mean a lot to your mother, but it might be a hassle for you as there is a lot to play with. I'd call ahead first to see if your mom wants the visit with so much activity and to see if he's even allowed. Also take toys and a drink and snack with you to keep him occupied. A small backpack he can carry should hold enough for a short visit. I hope your mom gets better soon!

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A.J.

answers from Tucson on

My husband was recently in ICU and was not doing well at all. I asked the hospital staff if I could let me son (2 &1/2)come in and they said it was fine but not for a long time. We went in and he saw Daddy and gave his hand a kiss and asked what the tube up his nose was for but then it got to be to much. My husband was not with it at all at the time so that was scaring him more then anything. It helped my husband so much though. I would just check to make sure they allow it and then plan on a short visit, it might do them both some good.

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S.M.

answers from Casper on

How did it go? If he did fine in the hospital room he might be okay. Then just watch your mom too. My husband does not like me to bring the kids to the hospital when he's real worn out from surgery. Once he can walk the halls he will see them for a while.

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K.D.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I don't even think ICU would allow a 2-year old, so it might not be an option anyway.

When my teenage nephew was in the hospital, I took my 2-year old and he freaked out when he saw the tubes and IVs and other medical devices. In hindsight, it was a terrible idea. So we had to take turns going to see my nephew while the other had to stay with my son in the waiting room. It was far more traumatic than I thought it would be. That's just been my experience.

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J.S.

answers from Colorado Springs on

I really do not think that he will understand what all the machines and tubes are. He may think they are toys. He will not remember or understand, but your mother will remember him being there. I would say you should take him. Maybe have a talk before and let him know what he will be seeing and to not be scared. If he is then take turns seeing your mom. Just my thought! Good Luck and I hope everything is ok with your mom. :(

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J.H.

answers from Billings on

Will they even let him in the ICU? We have a friend in the ICU right now, and we weren't even allowed to send flowers. I am not sure I would take him in there...it might scare him to see grandma like that.

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M.S.

answers from Denver on

My son was 2 and my daughter was 3 when I took them to see my mother. My mother was terminal so they let me bring them. I would check with the hospital first though.

If the hospital will allow it I would bring him, but make sure to bring a few things to keep him busy. I also wouldn't stay very long. The biggest problem I had with my son was him wanting to be loud.

My daughter remembers bits and pieces of it, but my son doesn't remember a thing. She wasn't bothered by it at all. She remembers Grandma sleeping mostly.

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M.C.

answers from Pocatello on

First of all I would check with the hospital to find out what their policy is as most ICUs do not allow children under 12 to visit. Unless your mother is terminal and he will not be able to see her when she gets home, I think it would be best to not take him. Most 2 year olds are very curious and into everything and an ICU room is not the place for a 2 year old to explore. I think it will just be more nerve racking for you to have him there and he isn't going to get much out of it anyway.

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S.

answers from Salt Lake City on

i would not take him. my 5 year old had trouble even seeing me after i delivered.

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M.H.

answers from Boise on

Most ICUs don't allow small children. Even if he isn't sick, he could still be carrying something that could be passed to the patients. Children often carry colds and things like that without anyone even knowing it. While that may be nothing to us, to someone in the ICU it could be deadly. I would make sure it was okay to bring him in.

Also, how close is he to you mom. I am sure that your mom would love to see him. But it could be very traumatizing for him to see her that way, especially if they are close. Exxample: When I had my daughter, my son was two and a half. The day after she was born my husband brought him in to see us. My son was so bothered and traumatized by seeing me in the hospital, it took him months to get over it. And there were no machines/tubes. Those can really scare a small child.

If you decide not to (or can't)take him,but still want them to be able to communicateand want to give your mom a bit of cheer, have him color pictures or make cards for her so that you can take them in. I am sure that will boost her spirits just fine.

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