Why Are You Still Breastfeeding?

Julie L: "selfish??" and "sucking on their mothers breast is a visual they would not want to have. In my day the only women who breast feed were the ones who didn't want to pay for ot could not afford the formula."

My goodness, there are no words. And you're lucky there aren't!

My baby is 8 mo old and just the other day a coworker asked me the same thing. Wow, you're really still pumping and breastfeeding? Isn't he kind of old for that!? I hope to continue until he's at least 1 year old, hopefully longer. He does get solid foods on top of his milk. He is healthy, I am healthy - everyone is happy! It has gotten more challenging as he's gotten older, but I would never have done it any other way. I'm proud to say I've gotten this far! Good for you momma! :)

LOL I caught HELL for breastfeeding from the get go! Especially from my husbands family (not my husband tho, he was all on board) I got "eeww WHY would you want to do that?" and "OMG that's like having a leech stuck to you" It was very hard at first and had lots o pain from incorroect latch at first and I got "why dont you just effing give up already!" I was banned to other rooms by myself if I breastfed at an inlaws house.

OK I am rambling...

My TEENS are just fine and have no issues from knowing they were breastfed!

Q: Why are you still nursing?

A: Because my daughter is still too young for cheeseburgers.

I did what worked for me and my child. I was the first of my friends to ween my child (14/15 months). I was ready, she was ready. It was time.

Some thought I'd waited too long. Other's thought I should breastfeed longer.

Tough titties. I did what was right for *my family*.

Different people want and need different things. Some ween for work (it's great to say by LAW we can pump at work. In reality, a lot of us work jobs where that isn't *possible*. I worked food service. I took breaks when I didn't have customers to wait on. I didn't have a PLACE to pump, or the time - consistent time - to do so. Eight hours of no relief? No fun. Dripping melons the size of my FACE. No fun at all.), some ween for medical reasons (I have a girlfriend who nearly lost her life in labor and her milk never came in - she uses formula), some wean because they gave it a good shot and it made them crazy. They couldn't parent authentically, Lovingly and presently while breastfeeding.

Support is a funny thing. What we need and want is often different. So the support to help us be well tended parents is often different. Especially when you bring in Class oppression.

I'm a HUGE breastfeeding advocate and I did, in fact, love breastfeeding from day one. That's not the case for everyone. It's not possible for everyone. Because people aren't getting the support THEY need, which might look like huge validation. It might look like not having to hide in cars or justify themselves to their family members. It might look like X,Y,Z, and it's not really for me to decide what's right for them. 'Cause I'm not in their life context, and I'm not in their body.

Did I get comments? Sure. Call me titty mama. I wasn't into feeding under blankets and aprons and in corners. So of course I got looks (both really affirming and disproving looks/comments). Great. I love validation (like...too much ;-) and I hate being "judged" (even if I'm just percieving it). The bottom line for me? It doesn't matter what "you" think. I'm going to plod along and do what's best for me and mine.

I imagine that most women are in the same boats.

What pisses me off, is that a lot of women don't have the same (real or perceived) choices that I did. They didn't have a community of women to talk about their tits with, or go out to coffee with, or just laugh/cry with. A lot of women don't work a few times a week (like I did), but every day. All day. Their pumping options are limited and their pay isn't even keeping them afloat. A lot of women come into motherhood with a deep internal voice that says, "breasts are not for feeding". That's not something that just get's placed on the shelf post labor. It's hard and needling. It's something that takes time (and loving support) to shift. A lot of women are deployed, or are ill, or are in relationships where the man belittles his partner or X,Y,Z.

So yes. I got comments on both sides.

I did what was right for me and my daughter. Their comments are theirs. Not mine. I'm not going to take them on, because it's none of MY darn business what THEY think.

Never nursed and never regretted it!! My kids are thriving and are very healthy Praise God! Breast feeding isn't for everyone and it is a personal decision.

Shame on them! I think breasfeeding is the best thing for baby and is the simplest best thing you can do for your child that sets her up for life with nutrition and immunity! Why would anyone WANT to give their baby formula - made in factories by synthetic ingredients! Once you get past night nursing it only gets easier - I nursed for 2 years! I think so many moms give up at 3 or 6 months because they feel like a "milking cow" but as your child grows older every day the nursing becomes less and less frequent - like only 4 times a day from months 9-12, and 3 times a day around 18 months. AND many moms feel it's time consuming/borring, yes it is, but once I realized this was my only 15 minutes of doing nothing and relaxed I loved the peace! Turns out this was the only time for the entire life of my child that they would stare into my eyes, sitting still and relaxed for long periods of time, I will cherish those memories forever, literally. Just tell those nay-sayers you love this special time with your baby, or you couldn't imagine giving your baby anything else!

I think a lot of women don't nurse past 3 months because that is general time frame for when women return to work. Breastfeeding is always much easier for the SAHM, because up until recently, there were no laws to provide a clean and appropriate place for nursing mothers to express breastmilk (thanks President Obama!). A lot of times expressing is confined to a dark, creepy bathroom somewhere in the workplace. And even though the laws have improved, there are no provisions that provide for the women working in workplaces with less than 50 employees.
As a working mom, I got tons of support from family and friends, just not from the great ol' USA and the male dominated lawmakers. :)
I stopped BF my so at around 5 mos. Long story- but he was much, much happier and healthier on formula (multiple and severe food allergies). I couldn't BF my daughter for more than 4 weeks due to strong meds I was put on for a prolonged MRSA infection.
Formula or breast- I don't really care. I have been on both sides of the fence. I support a woman that feeds her baby in any way she sees fit. :)

Yes - many of my mommy friends comment "I cannot believe you lasted this long! I could never do that! You are amazing"

Why I am still nursing:
- easy (except for the now biting problem!)
- all of my kids latched on easily, I have never had a prob w production either
- cheaper
- better for my babies - and I know I have a good diet
- Even though it is harder sometimes, I am determined.
- So convenient - baby is fussy? Whip that boob out! No need to wait for a bottle, find a place to make it in public, etc.
- My son LOVES it.
- My husband loves that I do.
- I couldn't imagine any other way. I personally feel this is what my body was made to do. Others don't. That works for them. =)

I will tackle your first question;

"It really seems as if most women hate, can not, or will not breastfeed. But why? If you can breastfeed (no medical conditions) why then choose formula? Is it easier?"

I think the puzzle peice you are missing is that for some women it is very difficult to bf and they loose the stamina to continue (burn out). Its usually a very agonizing decision for which most woman carry guilt, esspecially in this climate of BF awarness. You have simplfied this issue by imagining that there are two catigories of women, those who technically can nurse, and those who technically cannot. But there is a grey area and I think if you understood that grey area you would feel less incredulous about women to turn to bottle feeding. Let me just paint a little picture for you so you can see what a decision to bottle feed might look like. Mine is not an uncommon story. My milk did not even "come in" (perhaps because of massive water retention from 48 hours of IV fluids). I had an emergency C section, after 24 hours of labor and three hours of pushing and was struggling with recovery. My baby was introduced to a bottle againt my wishes in the nursery and promptly began to reject the breast. She was hungry always (took me a while to figure out that i was not making enough). My pediatrition allarmed at babies failure to gain weight made me do a quantitative feeding (pump and bottle feed, no direct breast feeding so everything could be measured). When we finished that baby was three weeks old and virtually refused to get back on the breast. In an effort to do supply demand only I stayed up all night exclusively BF (no suppliments), but eneded with fever and aches (a case of mastitis). When I finally began to accept that I had to supplment and could not exclusivly BF I resolved to put baby to breast for 15 min followed by a bottle. Plan failed and what little milk I did make dwindled even more. The whole time I felt like I was going to die. I had to pump with every feeding. My mother left after two weeks. In needed my husband and a good lactation consultant. But I had neither. my husband's company went under and he was laying off half his staff starting on the day I went into labor. 4 months latter he was layed off as well. In between that 4 months he was trying to pick up slack from layed of help and keep the co. affloat. So as far as support from husband, well, he did the best he could, but safe to say, I was on my own. At 6 weeks I became so weary I tearfully made the decision to bottle feed. I hope you can see that going the the bottle is not a flipant, uneducated, decision for a lot of women. I hope next time you see a woman bottle feeding her infant you can say to youself, gosh , i wonder what difficulties that poor woman faced that made her decide to bottle feed .

I nursed my first daughter until she was 2 1/2. I would get all sorts of comments - usually in amazement. And admittedly, it was hard for me not to be judgemental when women who could nurse, had no good reason not to nurse (in my judgemental opinion) chose to stop nursing before their baby turned 1. But nursing is easy for me, pumping is easy for me compared to what other women have told me of their experiences, and no it did not get harder. I was a little nervous about weening at her age, but I started the process when she turned 2 and we just took it slow. I figure the kids are only going to be little once, I will only wean each baby once, why not take it slow and let them transition at their own pace.
When people discuss with me whether they should nurse I like to comment that formula tastes awful (especialy compared to breastmilk) and note that all processed products have a standard for a 'maximum amount of rat feces' (which any is too much and I know there is no rat feces or dead bugs in my milk).
I work full time, am out of the house 9-10 hours per day easily, and nursing is something that only I can do with the girls. It helps us to keep our relationship, and I like the 1:1 time. I think if she used a bottle it would be easy for me to give her the bottle and then try to get the dishes done or throw in a load of laundry when I really should be trying to have quality interactions/bonding.

I think no matter what us moms do, we feel judged, and therefore defensive. I someone nursed for 6 months and was happy with that and stopped, then meets someone who went for a year, they instantly feel judged and maybe second guess their decision.

Personally, I think that if someone is truly ok with their decision of formula or breastfeeding, then they are fine with what other people do. This goes both ways, I know some breastfeeding moms who were sort of martyrs- they wanted this glorious feeling of perfect motherhood and sacrifice and tried to achieve this through breastfeeding. So if they saw a mom who had formula fed babies, and those babies were happy and healthy, suddenly she feels competitive and upset. And of course formula feeding moms feel judged for whatever reasons they didn't breastfeed.

I had to be somewhat in the middle. I started off breastfeeding and it was very easy, but because of medical complications from childbirth, I didn't produce enough milk. So I had to supplement and then exclusively formula feed. Maybe it's easier when you don't have a choice, I was just thankful that high quality formula is availalbe and my daughter thrived.

I don't think this will ever be solved until us as moms can accept our own decisions first, and support those of other moms.

I can only answer for me, here's my reasons, Formula was easier, before I had babys I saw breast feed children way beyond the time they should have been using a cup, bottle feeding and this is the most important that many moms are selfish about and that is the dads being able to participate in the feedings, exclusively breast feeding leaves the dad out of that, it's not fair (My opinion) my husband bonded wih all 3 of our children during feedings not just me. Another reason is I can't tell you how may times in public I have seen toddlers.babys digging in their mothers blouse looking for the boob. I had my children in the 80's and my children were just as healthy if not healthier (Cause i didn't have to worry about eatng something that made my baby's sick) than breast feed baby's. And my sons have thanked me for not breast feeding them because the idea of them sucking on their mothers breast is a visual they would not want to have. In my day the only women who breast feed were the ones who didn't want to pay for ot could not afford the formula. Everyone is different, that's what makes us all unique. J.

I breastfeed until my second son until he was 13 months. I only had about two or three people ask me why I was still nursing. I would just ask them why they were still giving their baby a bottle. I just didn't really care about there opinion. My thoughts.....I think alot of them are jealous. Jealous you can/are doing it, jealous that you stuck it out. I don't really care if people formula or breastfeed, but I think alot of people project their guilt about it onto others.

If it "ain't" broke don't fix it!

Way to go mama!

Hello,
I nursed my daughter for 21 months total. While I was pregnant, I read everything I could get my hands on about breastfeeding. From there, I learned that it can be challenging and even though it's completely natural, it's not always "easy." I love a challenge and am quite stubborn so I thought, that's fine. I can do it. Now that I knew that, I knew not to give up so easily.

Our daughter was born and in the beginning I needed to avail myself of a lactation consultant. With tips from her, we were on our way. My first goal was 6 months. When my daughter and I easily passed that, my next goal was a year. At a year, I learned that the World Health Organization recommends two years of nursing. I thought, "Ok, things are still going great; she and I have our rhythm, let's go for it. As I said, we made it to just under two years. By then, we were down to one to two sessions a day and I was ready to be done. I felt no guilt because I'd given it my all. It all ended easily and pleasantly. By that age, I could tell my daughter "Mommy's body isn't making milk any more because you're not a baby" -- and she understood that.

I did go back to work when our daughter was 5 months old and I pumped at work. My work installed a lock on our conference room and away I went. In California, we have laws protecting our rights to pump at work. It could have been difficult if I didn't have an employer who supported that law. Luckily, I did.

I think the most challenging thing about nursing is when baby goes through growth spurts and wants to nurse every hour on the hour. You feel like someone is hanging off your boobs day and night! Also, although I completely support anyone nursing in public, I could never make that work for me personally because my breasts are small and don't hang down so I'd have to pull my whole shirt up. The coverups didn't make me feel completely confident that I wasn't providing a peep show for everyone. So those weeks of growth spurts meant that I was essentially tied down at home. That's ok, though; to me it was still worth it because I felt like I was providing our daughter with the best nutrition that I could and that is what was most important to me.

Don't feel bad that people question why "you're still doing it." I mean, really! The nerve! I think my response would be something like "I"m still doing it because it's best for my baby" or "We'll continue to do it until we're done. Who know when that will be!" Luckily, no one really outright said that to me. I know that my mom and MIL were probably wondering this to themselves after our daughter turned one, but hey, they also know that I'm the lady that went through an epidural-free birth and did the whole family bed thing, too, which was counter to anything that they'd done themselves as moms so they know that I've made choices that work for me, and not anyone else.

Good luck to you and I'm so glad that you have the support that you need!

i have/do formula feed because i HAD to, my milk never came in with either of my pregnancies. i tried working with several LC's, tried the natural stuff, it just never happened, i even tried pumping for 2 months with nothing happening. My 3 boys, 2 1/2 and 8 month old twins, were all born with bilateral cleft lip and palate and they could never latch on, physically impossible. they couldnt even use "normal" nipples, we had to use a special feeder called a HABERMAN nipple for the first few months until they got past their lip repairs. I applaud you for nursing, I wish I could have!!!! the only time i think anything about a BF mom is when their child is 3 or up and still going at it, but that is just me. good for you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How old is your little one?

Mine is 16 months old, and we're still nursing. My oldest was a week shy of his 2nd birthday when we stopped. I'm sure I must get comments, but I don't even notice. I think it was probably more with my oldest, and I can't remember. :) But now I'm known among my friends for nursing my kids a lot, so the comments are less. I get that it's unusual at least in my set to nurse as long as we do, but whatever. My kids, my body, my business.

If people say, "Why?" or "How?" I guess I just answer, "I'm lucky it's always been easy for us."

Dear S.,

Two answers for you: The next time someone asks this (IMO inappropriate) question, just smile and say, "Doctor's orders." After all, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends breastfeeding until a child reaches 1 year, and even afterwards "as long as mutually desired by mother and child."

And, if you don't feel you have support from your immediate community, join La Leche League! They have monthly meetings full of breastfeeding moms. They'll definitely back you up, and it's also a great way to make friends who are fellow moms, and to begin building a social network for daughter.

Good luck, and stick with it!

Mira

I breastfed and pumped until my oldest was 13 months and the same for my daughter until she was 14 months. Everyone I knew either stopped after 6 weeks or just formula fed. So I got that a lot. I enjoyed nursing my kids and no matter how hard things got I'm glad I stuck it out.

I find it odd because out of all the moms I know only 1 formula fed.

I only seemed to get comments from older women where the norm was formula. I don understand if you are able to breastfeed (no medical problems) why formula feed. Formula is expensive, you have to buy bottles, water (if you not have good city/well water), you have to mix it, etc
Breast milk is free and ready to go, no fumbling around with miing and bottles during the middle of the night.

I breastfed for 2 1/2 years. I did it for 1 1/2 years because i believe it the best possible source of nutrition for my baby.I breastfed for that last year because i wanted to slowly wean. Because i know that abrupt weaning seem too cruel to me, and my daughter was emotionally attached to breastfeeding. It would be tantamount to one day just taking away a comfort object and putting it where she couldnt reach it, but in plain sight.

I think breastfeeding is not easier because you are the only one that can do it, and with most women it begins with trial, error and pain. But i do think its worth it, and should be done at least 1- 2 years. I dont think that if breastfeeding WAS easier that there would be so many formula fed babies.

But if it started easy for you , im sure it will stay easy. Breastfeed for as long as you and your baby want and dont let anyone else tell you different.

Only from my MIL. :)

I nursed my first to 14/15 months. I quit because I was 6 months pregnant with #2 and exhausted.

I nursed #2 until he was 17 months. I quit because I was 3 months pregnant with #3, and exhausted.

I nursed #3 until she was 18 months. I quit because I was exhausted (but not pregnant). My kids were 5, 3 and 18 months and I had been pregnant, nursing, or pregnant and nursing for almost 6 years straight. I needed a break, so I weaned my daughter. My choice, not hers. She probably would still be nursing if I hadn't weaned her, she was much harder to wean than my boys, and still asks about it now (she's 2 1/2).

I only had a few friends (friends who don't have babies of their own) ask me if I was still nursing after my babies were a year. My MIL started asking aorund 9 months... she's a firm believer that if they have teeth - they are too big to BF. Thankfully by the third she seemed to get over it a little and stopped asking.

GOod luck!
J.

I think the reason a lot of moms quit is because they go back to work. I had a hard time pumping but was blessed to stay home with my son. If I had to work, I would only have been able to breastfeed before and after work. Pumping is a major committment and it is really hard to do. I did bottle for a couple weeks as my milk ramped up in the beginning and neither I nor my son liked it. It was so much trouble making the bottle then I felt bad throwing it away since it was so expensive. Breastfeeding is so much easier!! As far as comments, I only got negative feedback after a year. One of my friends was really negative about it. Also the pediatrician wanted me to stop at 18 months. I was down to only 1 time a day from 2 1/2 years on and a month before my son's 3rd birthday we stopped completely. It was pretty easy to stop but I guess he was ready. But just so you know, when people ask how long I breastfed I say 2 1/2 because I feel like I sound like a freak if I say my son was almost 3!

I do and dont understand why moms turn to formula. I breastfed my daughter til she was 18 months; we actually just stopped about 3 weeks ago. But in the beginning, it was SO hard. The first 3 months were hell!! I saw lactation consultants, spoke with the dr., pumped everyday every 3 hours just to feed her, because it hurt SO bad. But I just pushed myself through it, because I knew I really wanted to breastfeed her. Not only that but my boyfriend was a great support. He actually almost was sitting there "cheering me on" when it got really tough for me and i just wanted to quit. I am SO glad I held out, because after 3 months the pain just vanished, and nursing my daughter was the best experience ever. I'm actually kind of sad it had to end, but now that i'm pregnant again the pain is ridiculous and i just couldn't get her to stay asleep at night. Now that she's done she sleeps!
But i still don't understand why soooo many women just choose right off the bat that they aren't going to breastfeed or try just for a couple days and move to formula. I do think support from husband & family helps, even if it's just someone reiterating that it's hard work but well worth it. I also think a lot of women are misinformed and/or not educated enough on the topic... It also seems like some women are almost 'ashamed' or embarrassed or whatever about nursing for longer than a few months; does anyone know what i mean? Like there's a "quiet" social stigma about nursing your kid over a year or even past a few months... you're a weirdo, or you're turning your kid into a momma's boy/girl,,,whatever.

I breastfeed all 3 of my kids. The first two only for 2 months because I had to go back to work, early 20's and when I tried to give them both formula and breastmilk it made them sick. They were fine if it was just one or the other but not changing. I loved breastfeeding. For my last child, 9.5 years later, I nursed him until 2.5, and he would have love to have done it longer. After 14 months old, just 2 times a day, always at night. Now I do understand getting negative comments from my family, didn't nurse in public so unless I told you then you would never know I did it so long. Many cultures nurse for several years. Plus it is "natural"; it really is the way God intended, now I do understand some women just can't or produce enough, but it's better for baby and mother to nurse.

I have 3 sisters, they all nursed their children to at least 1 year. I'm the only one that went past 14 months. I have found more moms going back to breastfeeding vs bottle feeding. I know my mom's generation did more with bottle feeding, she had us girls in the 70's.

Please breastfeed and don't listen to any negative advice, the best for your baby is breast milk!

I breastfed until mine bit me. I dont remember anyone ever giving me an opinion one way or the other, but, I also didn't ask anyones opinion! I did what I felt best. If you believe in what you are doing, don't look for approval or validation. Just do it because you think it's the right thing to do.

I am one of those women who has to thank my husband for his support. He was WONDERFUL, and without him I would definitely have ended up exclusively on formula very early on. I had a heck of a time, both with my milk supply and getting my daughter to latch. He not only put up with my tears, pumping 8-10 times a day, keeping a log of input and output, but finger-feeding her through a tube to get her to latch. That is a VERY slow process, although I think he liked feeling her sucking on his finger.

I was also lucky that my work was supportive, because I was a slow pumper. I had a nurses office, a laptop and a great boss. I could not have done it on my own.

That said - when it finally worked it was SO MUCH EASIER than formula. Waking up at night was picking her up snuggling back in bed and cuddling. We never had to run out and buy formula. We never had to worry about it going bad. It lasts much longer either chilled or even at room temp, so even bottles were easier to handle.

Fast forward almost 3 years - at about 1 year I started getting "comments" from one coworker and one close friend, and occasionally family members. I used the "the world health organization recommends breastfeeding for at least 2 years" to answer all comers until she was past two. Then, well, she loves it . We're just reaching her third birthday, and some time off of daycare and work, and we're working on weaning. As nice as it has been, I'm tired of being her pacifier and that what it is now. She even says so. And just like her friends are putting away their pacis at three, she's putting away hers! We're dropping one feeding a week, we're going to have a weaning party.... it isn't going to be easy, but even my husband is looking forward to it!

When I was nursing I heard this a lot too...

For a lot of people, having a baby is more about making it convenient for them than thinking about what works for the baby. It wasn't convenient to pump in my office three times a day, find refrigeration and then (lots of times) wake up in the middle of the night to pump b/c I was so full it hurt! But... my little guy benefited from it and I will do the same with this one.

I nursed exclusively for 6 months. When I went back to work and back to grad school, it got tricky and my supply dwindled. He was "supplemented" until he was 9 months old. I had a bad bout with mastitis and that was our "end", but would have happily continued through his first birthday if we were able to.

Formula is sometimes easier... but you have to carry it with you, mix it, pour it, etc. It's definitely NOT cheaper!

I am still breastfeeding, my son is 14 months. I've used formula for my first child after about 5 months because she was not getting enough milk due to me going on birth control. I've breastfed my other two children & find it easy, quick, & the very best for my children. I think many people are far from reality & have a stigmatization against breastfeeding, thinking breasts are sexual, & are still in a place in their lives where they don't want to devote the time it takes, I have seen many bottles propped for baby while the parent goes to do some thing else. Then there are other factors that simply don't provide for mom to nurse baby.
I feel breast feeding is best because it provides the best nutrition on earth for baby & the best of bonding, which is absolutely necessary during the first three years. There are severe natural consequences when a child does not form a secure bond during these years.
Keep on nursing till you feel it is time to stop, there is no set time.
Great Job nursing!

My first child nursed until he was 3. Through my pregnancy with my second and for 2 months I nursed both of them.
My second child nursed until he was about 3 months shy of 5 years old. He nursed though a pregnancy that ended in miscarriage at 8 weeks and I learned I was pregnant with my third child days after the last time he nursed.
My third child turned 2 in June. She is happily nursing and it's anyone's guess how long she'll nurse for. I can guarantee it won't end any time soon.
It gets so much easier as they get older. They become better at getting the milk from your breasts so they can easily get their fill in 5 minutes from one side and be on their way. You can ask them politely to wait while you finish your shower or change the laundry load. They do not nurse like a newborn as they get nutrition from other sources in addition to your breastmilk.
None of my children ever got formula. They never got a bottle of pumped milk. They only started a sippy of water when solids were introduced so they had something to prevent choking. They never got cows milk to replace the nurtition they got from breastmilk.
Even now when they get sick they never get as sick as their peers.
As for support. My husband and family are wonderful. On those days when they're sick or fussy or going through growth spurts when they nurse around the clock. My husband helps out with the other children. He brings me water or food. He helps with the house work. He doesn't start going on about wouldn't it be easier if you just gave them a bottle or some formula. When they're not hungry he'll take them and let me get some more sleep. When my first child was born in those first weeks he'd get him, change his diaper and give him to me so I could feed him then take him change his diaper again and put him in bed. I could get those few extra minutes of sleep I desperately needed. My family understand that my kids come with me. They understand if we have to cancel something or change plans because we're having a rough day. Leaving them with a random babysitter with a bottle full of something isn't an option and they're good with that.
In cultures where children are allowed to wean themselves it is not unheard of for them to nurse until in upwards of 7 years old. It is a societal standard not a natural standard of human nature to wean at 6 months or a year. It is an artificial calendar date set with no basis in what a human child needs. World Health Organization recommends at least 2 years, longer if mutually wanted by mother and baby.

Bottle with both. I tried with my first and I didn't work. Didn't even attempt with my 2nd! To each their own!

With my first I nursed for 6 months. For me, it was the right amount of time. I did it for him and pumped in many bathrooms to make it work. After 6 months he got teeth (didn't want to get bit), started eating solids and I felt at peace with it. It's all your preference. My second I didn't make it as long but he was a fussier baby and I struggled making the adjustment from 1 to 2 and allocating time. It was more me and I wish I had at least made it to 6 months but I only made it to 3. Moms can judge and say things are out of convenience but each person's situation is different and you do what you are comfortable with. You mention you gave your daughter formula for 3 days. I can tell you that when/if you decide to make the transition, do it gradually. Mix your milk with formula and gradually wean her off your milk. It may take her body time to adjust to the change and this would be a good way to do it. Jumping to it spontaneously is probably why she didn't do well.

I didn't read the other responses but I think it's a regional thing. Where I'm from if you don't breastfeed for AT LEAST a year you'll be judged. Everyone I know with the exception of one Mom breastfed and I know a lot of people who have had babies in the last decade.
The response you should use is you are trying to do the best for your daughter and it's common knowledge that breastfeeding has lots of benefits for all babies. Just because it's unusual to some people where you live doesn't mean that's true everywhere or even in a different social circle. Maybe you'll be instrumental in helping other new Moms to feel comfortable with their decision to breastfeed longer. You should be very proud of yourself!

Yes, my son will be one on 8/26 and we only nurse at night and morning now. We nursed exclusively to 9 months but I went back to work at 6 months. As a SAHM while on maternity leave, nursing was super easy for me with this baby (my first baby didn't latch - I didn't get any help with that and no one could tell me how to find a comfortable position to nurse after a horrible c-section). This one, just latched on in the delivery room like he was meant to be - but I'm sure it is because he got no pitocin and no other drugs! When I went back to work, I would pump enough for mid morning bottle and then run over at lunch to nurse him, pump enough for afternoon bottle, and nurse at pickup while at daycare. When I couldn't go over for lunch nursing anymore due to other work obligations, he became less interested, which made it much harder for me to get enough via pump. I wish he had been interested in nursing until 18 months or 2 but he doesn't miss it, he is still getting some breastmilk between my frozen reserves and our two sessions daily and I'm trying to find some peace.

No doubt, if you are with baby all the time, nursing is easier, you always have it with you, no bottles to clean and no expensive formula. If you work - it is much, much, much, harder. If you have a c-section, your chances of success at nursing are much less.

C.

My son is 4 months and he's a big boy, his dad is a big guy. So naturally he eats a lot. I mention this to friends or anyone...not complaining and they say "Have you thought of supplementing with formula?" Or "You should get some formula to have...ya know, just in case". And my questions are: "Why supplement with formula? I chose to breastfeed...my milk is still coming in strong...If I want a break, I can pump a bottle for his father or a relative to feed him" and "Incase of what? I'm a stay at home mom...when is there going to be an emergency that I need to bring formula into the picture?" He has never gotten formula and I'd like to keep it that way. Even his pediatrician gave me formula samples! that among other reasons made me switch doctors. So that's the flack I get about breastfeeding...I get formula pushers! lol Other than that, I get a couple of people staring at me while I nurse in public...surprisingly no dirty looks, just curiosity mostly.

i have never gotten any negative comments about breastfeeding my 2 kids. I nursed my son until he was 18 months (when I was 6 months pregnant with #2) and am currently nursing my 11 month old daughter. It seems like a lot of moms on here either get negative comments constantly or they like to promote how awesome they are for breastfeeding by ranting and raving about how discriminated against they are. I can tell you though that weaning is a LOT harder than just continuing to nurse. I am dreading weaning my daughter but plan to do it around her first birthday (i'm exhausted after being pregnant and/or breastfeeding for over 3 years now and want my body back! hah). Weaning is a very hard and painful thing to do for mom and baby alike, THATS why i'm still nursing and why i nursed my son past a year.

*added* i think in a perfect world, this breast vs. bottle debate would be non-existent. If you think about it, when your kids are in high school you will not be able to walk into a classroom and pick out the breastfed kids or bottle-fed. You will never care about it this much again until we have grandkids and are offering their mothers advice. Here's a great article about the argument FOR formula:
http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2009/04/the-c...

I've never gotten rude comments or questions from random people. My mother asks me pretty frequently how long I plan to breastfeed for. I've done it all - pumped, formula fed, exclusively nursed. Nursing is the easiest and most convenient as long as you don't have modesty issues. Formula feeding is most condusive to being able to leave baby away from you , whether that be at daycare or for a night out.

I nursed my first daughter until 6 weeks. she started eating more and i wasn't producing as much as she was eating, i would constantly be putting her to breast, and she was constantly crying, so i started giving her formula and pumping, I MYSELF thought formula was easier, because you could bring the powder and water separately and make it on demand and you wouldn't have to worry about transporting it... wouldn't have to worry about privacy issues. also, i was about to go back to work and wouldn't even consider asking for help with that from work becasue i was afraid that they would find some other reason to let me go so that they didn't have to deal with it, i was a single mother on my own with no help but my daughter was great with it and i never had any problems.
with my second child i was more determined. i borrowed a pump from wic and i began pumping in the hospital (against wic's recommendations) but i knew my body, i knew that i would have trouble once baby started eating more and i know that i wouldn't want to go back to bf once i started using the formula. so i pumped and pumped and pumped and freezed and freezed and freezed.. all while nursing, got to about two months old and got very ill with a fever of 104, baby didn't want to nurse because my skin was so hot, and it was to hard for me to push it while being so ill so i let my partner give her bottles of breast milk... she never went back to nursing after that but i continued to pump. it was VERY difficult. i had to feed the baby every 3-4 hours and pump ever 2-4 hours, my partner was VERY supportive of me nursing but not very willing to do all the chores and stuff that i didn't have time to do, also he made it rather difficult for me by wasting my time a lot of the time and being careless with the breastmilk bags, leaving them out overnight, which made me feel like i couldn't count on him to help me without suffering some sort of eminent set back. life was very stress full me and my partner were always fighting i never had time to do anything, we had several parties we had and were invited to, we lived an hour away from everyone so we had to pack up the pump as well as everything the baby would need, worrying about pumping while trying to enjoy a party or a visit (HUGE modesty issues) turned into missed pumps and decreased milk supply which turned into me feeling like a failure again and again... i eventually stopped. but i made it almost 6 months which was a far cry from 6 weeks. i wonder, how old is your baby, how long have you been breastfeeding?

I don't remember anyone commenting on the way I fed my child. I guess I just did what made sense to me. My mother, in the 60s, BF all four of us. She was proud of that fact because mothers were being pushed to use formula then. I'm sure she BFed partly because my parents couldn't afford formula, but on the other hand, she was proud of doing it for us. I wish I had asked her more questions, as she died four years before my daughter was born.

I'm glad I didn't have any issues BFing because I didn't have any friends or family that I would have felt comfortable talking to about it. It came "naturally" to me and my daughter and seemed so easy. No packing bottles and stuff to leave the house, it's all self-contained!

I BF for 11 months and then my baby self-weaned. She was done. I was a bit sad, but looking back, her self-weaning saved me making the decision, so it all worked out well.

With my 1st son, now 7.5 years old, I was unable to breastfeed due to I was put on blood thinning medication. I was devastated. He did fine on formula, and I still made sure we bonded during feeding times. My 2nd son, 20 months old now I was able to breastfeed. I loved it and thought it to be great bonding time for us. I was a SAHM as well so was easier o think not having to pump for work. I breastfeed him till he was 14.5 months and only stopped due to he got thrush & passed it to me after double ear infection and medication. I was trying to wean him but it not for that sure I would of went another month or so. I think its wonderful if you can and choose to bteadtfeed.

All of mine have been fed breast milk until at least 6 months. My twins were fed pumped milk until 6 months as they never figured out how to feed directly from me due to being sma;; and having week sucking reflexes at birth. My 3rd was breastfed until 9 months when nursing strikes started in earnest because I was pregnant and he either did not like the quality or the slower release of my milk. We kept up part time until 10.5 months, but it became a fight instead of a bonding experience. My current baby is 4 months and nurses like a dream. I think that smaller and/or preterm babies are often much more difficult in the beginning. This is my first baby that came out of the womb knowing what to do, the others were all smaller and a big struggle. Breastfeeding is always hard in the beginning, but gets a bit easier as you go. Bottle feeding stays about the same so at about the 6 month point it actually seems much more convienient to breastfeed than have to be constantly managing formula which you have to mix, bring with you, wash bottles, worry about how long its been out, waste etc. I am very probreastfeeding, but when I bottlefed my twins there were some advantages for sure - mainly that I didn't have to worry about offending anyone or finding a quiet space when we were out and about, if I had been giving them formula I could have eaten and drunk what I wanted, and that anyone could do it - it didn't have to be me every time. However, breastfeeding is healthiest for my child and I am willing to give up my body for another 12 months to make that happen.

my daughter is 2 1/2 and we are still nursing... i like nursing a toddler, because even if she doesnt eat very much, she still nurses.

I can provide an answer regarding support. I had 4 cases of mastitis within a 4 month period of time. My husband kept telling me it was ok to give up nursing, it wouldn't make me a bad mom, why don't I just give it up, etc. etc. etc. I had to yell at him and tell him that instead of giving me permission to stop, what I really wanted was SUPPORT to keep on going. I needed a cheerleader to get me through those very painful flares (complete with temps over 102, extreme fatigue, and allergic reactions to every single antibiotic they put me on-fun times). Because I had already decided that I would breastfeed for the first year, I needed someone close to me to support that decision. It finally clicked for him and he did eventually give me the support I so desperately wanted and needed. I kept going until 9 or 10 months when she decided she was all set. It was hard for me because I wanted to go on until at least a year, but she was seriously DONE! I'm glad I powered through because after the first months the mastitis was no longer a problem.

My DD is 15 months old, and I am still nursing her. We had plenty of issues for the first 6 months... she wouldn't latch right, then she just wasn't an efficient nurser (she would literally take 45 minutes each side, for every nursing session), she had allergy and reflux issues, etc. I had recently moved to the other side of the country, and had literally NO support. actually, I had some people slamming me for nursing! Of course, we were broke and couldn't afford formula without adding a huge strain to our budget, so there really wasn't much of a choice. lol.

I WAS a nursing/breast feeding mom....and because I FELT it was best for my baby...

Greg nursed until he was 28 months old...
Nicky self-weaned and did it himself the day he turned 1 - he was done...

I understand it's preference....but I PREFER breastfeeding over formula...I know there are some on here who will have a complete and utter melt down and say mean things to women who choose to formula feed...I can't...I haven't walked in your shoes so if you had to formula feed - so be it... TO EACH HIS OWN!!

I think it's important to always remember that not all moms are able to breast feed as long as they would like. There are so many factors involved, and I know so many women who suffered through terrible guilt and pain because they were not successful in nursing their babies. Breast milk is the best and it's wonderful to read the awesome stories here, but there should never be a judgment made against any mom who is doing the best that she can.

I never gave formula but I don't think I nursed a long time. It was until around 9 months. By then they were on milk and food. Maybe I am strange, who knows.

I am envious of u mothers that are still breast feeding my baby was in the Nicu and it was hard for me to keep up with his schedule w/ 3 other kids at home from 9-5 and not to bad mouth my husband but he was no help so I'm doing chores and everything else that was needed and trying to find the time to sleep enough to eat enough to pump enough which none of it seemed to work ( so I finally just gave up sadly) but my baby is now 5 months 15lb later still heathly with formula ( not dogging the breastfeed baby it's a bond that I never got with my baby that I so wanted )

I BF'd till my son was 2.5 years old and did get the amazement comments. BFing is natural, but not always easy, so I think it blows people's minds when it's super easy. Plus there have been several generations that didn't BF so they aren't entirely comfortable with it. Just reply with "i got lucky that it's been easy and we're going to go on as long as we both want to."

Among my extended family and friends nursing is the norm, some nurse longer than others but most of us did for the first year.
And I never got into breastfeeding discussions with strangers at the store so I can't answer to that part of your question, lol!

I breastfed my daughter for just about 13 months. I actually never 'wanted' to do it but always knew that I would try and give it my all because it really is best for your baby. I never saw it as the amazing bonding experience that everyone said that it would be until I actually did it for myself. I kept saying thath I will do it until she is 6 months and then thats it but lo and behold I loved it and continued right up to the year and a bit past. I personally am not the type of person that would choose to do extended breastfeeding and I weaned my daughter gradually at a year. It took all of 3 weeks of mixing breastmilk with whole milk to get her weaned and we didnt encounter one issue. All in all I am very very very glad that I managed to breastfeed for an entire year and I plan on doing the same for my next baby due in Feb.
Good Luck