What Is the Big Deal?

Updated on December 11, 2012
L.M. asks from Hartly, DE
24 answers

Call me dense but I don't get what the bid deal is over this radio shows "prank call" regarding Prince William and Kate. Radio shows have been doing prank calls for a long time. No harm was really done...it was meant to be all in fun. I can't believe the staff fell for their fake accent and, with or without that, I am surprised they got past the first person on the phone let alone the second.

I realize the death of the nurse takes it to the next level but the radio hosts did not do this...the nurse did. Should she be embarrassed, sure. Should she have taken it that serious? certainly not.

*Let me clarify...I have never been a fan or seen the humor in prank calls. They are annoying at the very least. However, the caller didn't force the nurse to give out info and based on what I heard, didn't see where much "private" info was given out considering what is made public about these people already. I completely understand Kate needing her rest and the nurse being embarassed and maybe even upset due to her career situation but I don't believe a prank call in and of itself should be blamed for her apparent fragile state of mind.

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So What Happened?

I appreciate everyone's answers. Sorry that anyone thought I felt the nurse's death was no big deal (it very much is). I meant the call itself was really no big deal. In the scheme of pranks, it was a very benign one especially in comparison to some these particular djs have done (I was not aware of those when I posted the question). Prank calls in general are typically in poor taste but not worthy of so much attention. I guess my view is very much in line with Stacey B, Mom2many, and Angela S.

A simple "we can't release information about patients over the phone" would have shut this call down. It is a shame that the nurse had the issues she must have had to take her own life especially for something like this...very sad.

I do agree that people do need to take others feelings into account before they say/do something but I also have noticed that people use technology so much that they don't seem to know how to interact with people. As this continues they don't seem to know how to take things "with a grain of salt" and not everything is a major issue.

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S.Q.

answers from Bellingham on

Prank calling has been going on for years. It's puerile comedy, but has been accepted in radio land forever. Even Prince Charles made a joke about it.

I am afraid that if we stopped doing things because of the fear of others' reactions we would be paralysed.

There's a lot we don't know in this case - was she being bullied in the workplace? How did the hospital treat her? Was her death even related to this incident? If it was, it was an incredible overreaction. If the prank call had not been made, something else may have triggered this suicide.

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K.M.

answers from Chicago on

I agree that the DJ's should not be the only one's taking the heat - the radio station & its legal team should be sharing in it as well I agree that this woman must have had other issues going on. We never know all sides of a story.

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L.R.

answers from Washington DC on

One thing that has not been mentioned much: The nurse who killed herself was not the one who gave out information, just the one who transferred the call, and I would worry that the nurse who actually talked to the DJs and conveyed information might be very, very fragile herself just now. She will never live this down. It would have been bad enough as it was -- her colleague's suicide now adds a horrible new dimension to that second nurse's problems coming out of this.

(By the way, the call came in at 5:30 a.m. London time and the nurse answered because secretaries were not on duty yet at that hour. The secretaries at this hospital are well trained to weed out this sort of thing becuase the hospital caters to nobility and the wealthy, so had a secretary answered, the prank likely would have ended there. But who knows -- this poor nurse may have been tired at the end of long shift, wasn't experienced with these kinds of calls, etc.)

I do not blame the DJs (this wasn't even a truly malicious call if you listened to it -- they were goofing). They are getting death threats now and have lost not just their jobs on this show but their careers -- they surely will never work in any media again.

But let's blame the culture, in many countries including the U.S., where humor is so desperate that prank calls pass for a way to spend time on the air.

It wasn't a vicious call, and wasn't even as bad as the on-air diatribe two British "comedians" did on radio several years ago where they went on the air and left horrid, demeaning voice mail messages for a respected older actor -- the content was far worse than anything these DJs did (and did get those comedians a reprimand, but one has a major talk show still and the other -- is Russell Brand, who isn't hurting at all). So it's all situational. If the actor or another person talked about so viciously in that British radio program had committed suicide, those two men would be exactly where these two DJs are now, and the Austrailian DJs didn't say anything vicious like these other jerks did.

I feel sorry for everyone involved, including the DJs, but of course mostly the nurse and her family. The family is now demanding an outside inquiry because it wants to know if the hospital pressured the nurse (and the second nurse) at all.

By the way, to the person who posted, "Maybe she was feeling guilty because she willing put them through thinking that she might gain something. Who knows what was in her head? She should have left us a note. In fact, I think that the suicide laws should be changed to require that a note be included." -- Seriously? Please tell us you're joking on both counts. If you meant those statements, well, how incredibly cruel.

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K.F.

answers from New York on

The big deal is that private medical information was given to strangers. That is a very big deal. The death of the nurse a by-product of a "joke" is also very serious. The fact that their "joke" may cost some people their jobs at this particular hospital and perhaps their career all for the sake of a "joke" is also very serious.

When people are hospitalized it is expected that the medical professionals not release their information to anyone calling.

So yes a "joke" in poor tastes can be a very big deal. People shouldn't be played with so carelessly because you never know who is sensative and who isn't. Would you want someone else's practical joke to cost you your career? Wouldn't you think that it was serious and a very big deal?

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E.B.

answers from Denver on

I think the biggest issue lies with the fact that the DJs did not end the call or the prank when they realized they were being transferred to her room. But to continue the prank, even when they knew they were now violating patient privacy laws, was where they went terribly wrong. They should have hung up when the nurse agreed to transfer the call to the princess' room.

And part of the explanation lies in the way the British people view their beloved royals. We don't understand that here. We have celebrities that we seem to idolize, but it's not the same. We were living in Europe when Princess Diana died, and I was astounded at the personal level of grief that I saw. It wasn't the same somber atmosphere that I have seen in this country, like when the Challenger space shuttle exploded, or when someone famous has died. It was more personal, like the grief that the families of the space shuttle astronauts showed. That nurse may have been a loyal devotee of Princess Kate, and she may have felt grief on two levels: she violated her nurse ethics, but more deeply, she may have felt like she betrayed the princess.

And I do believe that it shows, in a very public way, the effects that playing a trick on someone can have. We don't usually see suicides. But too often, we don't see the shame that someone feels, the humiliation, the sorrow, the depression and the lifetime of anxiety that can result from being the victim of pranks, bullying, being made fun of in school, and relentless teasing. It's not entertainment. Perhaps that nurse had been the subject of teasing or bullying, for her accent, or skin color, or any number of things, and this was just the unbearable last straw. We need to make sure that in this world, we're not heaping one more straw upon someone's back.

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

It is a big deal because, even though we tease our family members, friends, co workers, maybe even people in the spotlight, this woman was a private person. She was known for being very professional at her work.

She was extremely private as a person.

To be embarrassment and humiliated in such a public way, was more than she could bare emotionally. They said the hospital and staff had tried to reassure her, it was not a big deal, but to her, it was a huge deal to have her name out there associated like this.

Imagine if your mom, had been pranked on an international level, while at work, knowing forever in history she fell for this and gave out such personal information? Would you then feel this was not such a big deal? What if she were a very shy person and her work and professionalism meant everything to her?

Imagine this..when this child is born, we will probably always associate this woman's death, with this child. All because of an innocent prank..

Bullying comes in lots of forms.. And playing pranks is one of them. Teach your children, that we never know how our actions will affect others, so we never take chances or play with people's feelings.

Just my own opinion.

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A.C.

answers from Atlanta on

There is a doctrine in the law that states that you take your victims as they are. Basically, this means if you punch someone and it turns out that they already had a back injury and your punch paralyzes that person, you are responsible for paralyzing that person. It doesn't matter that on a normal, uninjured person the punch would have caused minimal damage. Because you committed the crime, and you should always assume the worst, you take your victims as they are. This doctrine in the law has been used over and over again in all sorts of situations. I am not a lawyer, but I had a friend go through this, and I paid attention.

This doctrine is not usually applied to mental health, however, probably because the injury sustained doesn't show itself right away. Frankly, I think it should be applied. At the very least, this prank was something that could have gotten the nurse fired once the radio hosts realized they were being transferred to Kate's room. It appears that the nurse (who was not a receptionist and, from what I understand, does not usually answer phones) was mentally fragile and had additional problems, but that's the risk the DJs took when they did a prank that at the very least could have cost her a career. They perpetrated a fraud against this family using this woman, and that they didn't know that she already had mental issues does not excuse them.

You take your victims as they are.

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K.F.

answers from Salinas on

The expectant first time Father's Mom, Diana, was hounded most of her life and then killed while being pursued by paparazzi.
His new wife just had pictures of herself topless plastered worldwide, taken from a mile away while she thought she was completely alone with her husband.
This couple is expecting their first child and are dealing with severe morning sickness, a serious health issue. I'm sure it's scary for them, she is in the hospital for God's sake.

I think it's easy believe it's not a big deal until you really put yourself in their shoes. It just feels like nothing is off limits, nothing important enough for people to just leave them alone once in a while. It seems they give a lot of themselves but the world just wants everything.

I am not a "royal watcher" in anyway, in fact I find the whole thing ridiculous. I just keep thinking about how things snowball. Someone starts off to play a mean prank and then that questionable action sets off a chain of events that ends in a very sad way.

I saw the DJ's last night on the world news. They did not seem particularly authentic in their remorse. Their station is responsible for other Horrible "pranks" in the past. One had to do with asking a 14 year old about her sex life on air she then revealed she had been raped. Another was yanking a woman, who had 5 disabled kids, about having won some prize in a contest that never existed. It seems many of their pranks are quite cruel and this one just sparked an event no one could have predicted.

Who knows why that nurse would take her life over something that seems trivial to us. While I don't think they are responsible for her death It does seem that the ball got rolling in that direction through a thoughtless act on their part.

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S.Y.

answers from Chicago on

Just shows you that when you do something stupid/silly that there can be unintended consequences that you can not predict and will have to live with. Yes I do think that the pranksters should bear some responsibility in this whole mess.

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T.S.

answers from Denver on

Is prying into someone else's business funny? Is it okay to use someone else's struggle as a source of entertainment? I think that the "big deal" is that we have lost our ability to question. We don't stop to think about what we are really calling entertainment. We have come to a place that loss, pain, suffering, violence, and struggle are entertaining rather than a call for healing and kindness. The "bid deal" is that pranks are rarely kind and usually harmful in some way. Is it really okay to embarass someone or to invade someone's privacy? We wonder why so many of us walk around in fear and pain when invasion of boundaries is considered fun and entertaining.

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S.B.

answers from Houston on

While I don't like "shock jocks", I have a huge problem with how this has all been the fault of the radio personalities.

First, an attorney for the radio station did reach out to the hospital prior to the airing of the call. This was not a "live" call. It was recorded. It was reviewed by the attorney and deemed okay to air with no legal issues.

Second, I'm sorry the nurse killed herself but I would like to know if she was having other issues besides this. I can't even start to say how bad I feel for her family. This is a tragedy for them.

It is my understanding that the information given was very limited so I really don't know how much private information was given.

Personally, the nurse should have been fired. I would also like to know what the protocal at the hospital is. If others violated the protocal then they should be fired as well.

In no uncertain terms to I think what the radio station did was funny. Its not. That's why I never listen to that sort of stuff. Including Howard Stern, Imas etc. I just don't think they are funny. But to put the blame totally on the radio personalities is wrong.

The hospital has some explaining to do as well.

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J.C.

answers from New York on

I don't think the DJs should take any heat at all. They were doing what DJs do. It was an innocent prank turned bad. If you hear the actual tape, all that person who committed suicide did was answer the phone and put the call through. She obviously had severe emotional problems. Kate's actual nurse was the one who gave out too much information.

It's a sad story - but those DJs are not to blame.

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J.B.

answers from Houston on

The royal family takes themselves way to serious, IMO.
The nurse obviously had other issues in her life that contributed to her death.

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C.V.

answers from Columbia on

How would you feel if this were YOUR daughter in the hospital, and some radio show called her while she was sick...impersonating you?

I know I would feel as if my privacy were violated.

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J.O.

answers from Boise on

I happen to agree with you, although the death of the nurse is sad, and troubling, and in no way 'no big deal'.

This was a prank, and a bad one. It didn't take a brainiac to realize that the voices on the other end were not the queens or her husband/son (can't remember). Had the nurse followed protocol, there would be no prank.

That is what the radio show had expected, they did not expect to get answers, and when they did they rolled with it. I don't know many people that wouldn't have.

The average persons reaction would not be to commit suicide. There was more going on in the nurses life then one bad prank. Suicide is not something that just pop's into one's head and they do it. Maybe this was the straw that broke the camels back, but who's to say the next rude person at the grocery store wouldn't have had the same effect? Would we blame that person? Not likely.

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B.F.

answers from Dallas on

While others get a kick out of tricking people and embarrassing them, you never know the volatility of the other person. You don't know how they are going to take it.

When we are raising children, we should be helping them to understand when you joke or kid someone you need to know that person can take ribbing. It's not really funny if you are the only one laughing. Laughing WITH someone is different than laughing AT someone.

I am not surprised that you are puzzled about this. We have raised generations that are so disconnected with others that they no longer consider the other person's feelings. Empathy is a learned skill. Our comedians have stopped being insightful and are just spiteful. There is no such thing as wit anymore.

When a person is in the hospital the staff takes their job seriously. They want to be as professional as possible and still be supportive to worried family members. They are not kids off the street. They are not trained to spot impostors, they are not even thinking about something as silly as that. They are thinking what does this vital sign mean or evaluating the stability of a situation. They are serious people doing a serious job.

If you want to prank someone, that's a stupid place to do it.

Next time maybe these DJs can think before the do something dumb. It needs to be an example. You can choose to do a lot of things but you can not choose the consequences. Choose wisely.

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L.M.

answers from Reno on

If all it took for this nurse to take her own life was embarrassment, then there had to be some underlining psychological problems going on, in my opinion. The DJ's shouldn't be held responsible for someone else's actions.

I haven't heard, however, if the nurse received threats or ridicule. And if so, was it so bad, she felt bullied into taking her own life....?

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☆.H.

answers from San Francisco on

I think that pranking someone in another country is playing with fire. Clearly these DJs did not fully appreciate the cultural aspects involved here. Nor did they think about the effect their stunt would have on international relations.
They had extremely poor judgement and should be fired!

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A.F.

answers from Fargo on

I am actually appalled that you said that no harm was really done. A lot of harm was done and while the nurse did choose to take her own life, she was a LIFE, and life should be treated with more respect.

Riley has great insight on this subject. I think we could all do with a little more understanding.

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G.W.

answers from Dallas on

While I believe this woman had to already have some issues and this was what pushed her over the edge, I think what these two did was very wrong. I'm all for funny stuff on the radio but this crossed the line on so many levels. Everyone deserves and has a right to privacy where their medical care is concerned. To trample on that is very, very wrong. These two radio personalities had no business trying to invade Kate's medical information and situation at all. Yes, she is a high profile royal and there is a certain expectation that she is "fair game" but not about her health care and the information concerning it. This could never be explained away in my mind as simply a prank. Even if this woman had not taken her life, I feel the two should have still lost their jobs because again, in my opinion, they crossed the line of decent human behavior. We are all entitled to be able to seek medical care without fear of private information being hunted and devoured by unethical wolves...

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H.P.

answers from Houston on

I agree.

Not revealing personal information is the job of the people in charge of the information. It's likely that other people were calling the hospital, as well, and were turned away, as they should have been. If she was the wrong person answering the phone, then it's absolutely their fault. (Her family should sue the hospital.) They might as well just let anybody passing by answer the phones. They should beef up on protocol for giving information over the phone. Here, it doesn't matter who the person on the other line claims to be or what he/she sounds like, policy requires at least a "secret" code before revealing anything. Bless her heart for not having the fortitude to handle this situation or for just getting caught off guard, but it's nobody else's fault that it's come to this end. Maybe she was feeling guilty because she willingly put them through thinking that she might gain something. Who knows what was in her head? She should have left us a note. In fact, I think that the suicide laws should be changed to require that a note be included.

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A.L.

answers from Las Vegas on

I don't think they should have played the prank.. sometimes, Just because people are famous, they are also taken advantage of.. and that just isn't right.. Although, I think it's VERY sad that the nurse committed suicide, I have to believe that to do it because of the call, just doesn't seem quite right. In other words, I suspect that "maybe" there were some other emotional issues going on.. In any event, truly sad for her family.. I don't think anyone saw this coming...

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S.L.

answers from Kansas City on

Well the kings used to behead people for less so maybe she was so humiliated she felt that was the answer, which of course it wasn't and the queen today seems to be less for putting people in the tower. :-) I think it's just different there concerning the royal family.

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A.S.

answers from Boca Raton on

I don't excuse the behavior of these DJ's, but I don't think they were necessarily responsible for this woman's unfortunate death either. It's doubtful that we know the whole story, and I don't want to pre-judge before all the facts come out (if they ever do and they probably will not).

Unfortunately the royal family are public figures, and as such they are subject to alot of shenanigans (which is why they have such tight security). In other words, this stuff goes with the territory (as sad as that is).

To me it defies logic that the hospital would have such lax procedures when dealing with one of the most well-known persons in the world.

Again, I do not excuse the behavior.

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