Hi Moms,
Hopefully some of you can help me out here.My nephew had been living with us for 5 years. (ages 8-almost 13) He and his brothers and sister were taken away from his mom by cps and she did what she needed to get them back however he ended up just staying with us. He decided this past year that he really wanted to move back with his mother and brothers and sister. It was very hard for my husband and me. We thought of him as a son. He was very happy here but there was an emotional need to be with his bio family. Before he went back with his mom, he didn't see them or talk to them very much, but sometimes when he did, he would wet the bed. Anyway, this week he came to spend a little time with us. Both nights he has peed in the bed. The first night I thought he drank water to late, but last night I didn't let him have any before bed and even woke him up at 4:30 to go. So between 4:30-8:15 he peed. What could be going on? I asked him if he wanted to go home or if he missed his mom and he said no. I don't know if he associates his old room with those feelings of missing her or if maybe he is missing us and wants to come back. Help!! I only want what is best for him. Thanks and sorry so confusing.
Stress can definitely cause bed wetting. He's young and may not really have words for his feelings yet.
http://aacap.org/page.ww?name=Bedwetting&section=Fact...
Does this child have a counselor he can talk to? Teenage years are hard enough on most kids, without the added stuff he's been through.
My best advice is try not to make a big deal about it. Always be there for him - let him know he's welcomed anytime and that you love him.
Often times when kids are going thru tough emotions they regress... I also wonder since he is 13 could this be "wet dreams" or "nocturnal emmissions"? Totally natrual during puberty.
sounds to me like he is so peaceful at your house and sleeps so sound that he just doesnt wake up to pee.... Or like the other poster said could be wet dreams as well. Neither of my sons did the wet dream thing, so I dont know if they pee during the nocturnal emission or not.
It sounds to me like he is emotionally torn as to where he wants to be. This has to be very difficult for him. It sounds like he would benefit from counseling, but you are in a hard spot if his mom has custody. You don't say how close you are to his mom, but a conversation may be in order. Best of luck to you.
switching from one bed to a different one can cause that, it happened to me as a kid , and my daughter does it now, in your sleep you can struggle to find a bathroom in the unfamiliar darkness, then either pee in your closet or the bed. A few times my daughter peed in the kitchen.
When my niece started living with us, particularly when she had seen or talked with her mom, she would regress. Often times this manifested through her bowl or urinary habits. I spoke with a child physiologist who affirmed that it is very normal for all children who are experiencing trauma or transition, particularly for foster/kinship care kids. Its just a form of coping. My niece is 3 1/2 - so I don't know how helpful my answer is - but I thought I'd put it out there anyway. Good luck. I know these situations are really rewarding but also very painful and tricky.
It could be stress but it could be something worse. You should definitely take him to the doctor, it could be a hormone imbalance maybe diabetes? If its just emotional problems has he seemed different, depressed? Have you taken him to a therapist? Being taken away from his family so young had to effect him in some way even if he was happy with yall. You should make an appt with a therapist just to be safe. If he doesn't need to go back good but it cant hurt for him to talk about his feelings :]
He has had something happen, either seen, heard, something, and he needs to talk with a councilor about things, he needs help and he is not getting it from his bio mother. Please help him he needs you.
13 seems old, even for emotional bed-wetting which my 5 year old is sometimes prone to. I am sure it is linked, I just think it is indicative of how great his emotional upheaval is. I doubt it is worry about being at your house, but more linked with his emotional issues from his mom's house. I would ask the mom if he has been wetting the bed at her house and find out how often. I would also talk about getting him some therapy, given all that he has been through, even without the manifestation of his inner emotions with bed-wetting, I think it would help with the transition and addressing residual abandonment issues (and whatever caused CPS to pull him in the first place).
I think an open conversation with your nephew is appropriate too. I always believe in open and honest lines of communication with kids. Sit him down for a serious talk, let him know you care, and you want to find out how things are at his mom's house. You know it has to be rough after so many years. Ask him what he likes best, what he dislikes most. Remind him he can always be honest with you and you'll always have his best interest at heart. If anything he says rings warning bells, ask him if he would prefer to stay at his mom's or come back to you guys, let him know he is always welcome but in a non-pressure way so he doesn't have the added guilt of letting someone down.
Did you bring this up with his PED when you had him? Does he do this at his mothers house?
I don't think much of it, my nephew peed the bed for quite some time. He stayed the night with me and he peed on my coach.
I think you did fine by waking him up to go the the restroom, it reminds him he needs to do that.
Wet dreams, perhaps, but you kind of mention he did this before, so probably just peeing the bed.
