Toddler Bedtime Concerns

Have you seen the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth? It's about 10$. It's a great book and I'm still referring back to it with my 5 year. I've underlined, circled, etc in this book. Hope it helps.

I wonder if you wake her up that early or she wakes up that early on her own? My kids go to bed at about that tome too but they sleep till about 9:30 or 10a.m. So i think maybe she should go to sleep earlier at night

You may want to try cutting the nap time in half. Seem like she has developed her own schedule and only has a little time to see dad. See if he will try to sit with her until she falls asleep. She may be seeking more quality time with him and probably hears him moving about outside her room. Also try a book or music. A smooth jazz cd works wonderful for my 3 month old twin grand daughters bedtime. Lastly, when is bath time? If you do it right before bed it should be relaxing. If in the morning try switching it. She may have her own schedule but you have to make it comfortable for you all especially with the new baby coming.

You might try moving her eating, napping, and playing schedule earlier. Then when it starts to get close to bedtime, do not let her have anything to eat or drink an hour before going to the bedroom. Turn off all the lights and try doing quiet projects with her like reading, playing with a dolly or blocks, singing, etc. I usually have my toddlers eat lunch around 11:30am, nap around 1:30pm for no longer than 2 hours, then have play time outside or craft time. Then we eat dinner around 6-6:30pm. After dinner, there are no other snacks or drinks. Sometimes they get a cup of water, but nothing after 7pm. 8pm all lights out in the house. We might have the TV on, but I turn the volume way down. I sit down with the boys on the couch and they start to cuddle up and slow down their activities.

By the time we head upstairs for bed at 8:30pm, they have had time to wind down. I have them pick out their clothes for the next day, get their backpacks ready for daycare, brush teeth, go potty. They are in bed by 9pm and usually asleep no later than 9:30pm.

This sure sounds familiar. Basically the same situation I found myself in about a year ago when my second daugher was born. My almost 2 1/2 year-old had a TERRIBLE time going to bed. It was a struggle for us to even graduate from rocking her to sleep to sitting by her bedside at night until she fell asleep. Eventually it got to the point where we were lying down with her until she fell asleep. By the time we moved in with my parents (while our new home was finished being built) she was expecting one of us to sleep with her all night, usually daddy was her first choice since he works all day and mommy needed to be with the baby. When we knew our house was going to be completed, we began telling our daughter that when we move into the new house then she would be big girl and have to start sleeping by herself. We really talked it up and even bought her a new comforter/sheet set. We had a date set and our daughter knew it. It has not been easy and she is still a struggle to get to bed at night sometimes, but the one thing I have learned through all of this is that when I say something, I have to stick with it. It hurts us, as parents, more than it will ever hurt them. I have set bed and nap time expectations with her sister from the very beginning and she is a wonderful sleeper, unless she is sick. And as far as naptime...let them nap. My younger one takes a 2 hour morning nap and then they both go down for a nap from around 2-4, give or take a 1/2 hour depending on how tired they are. We always begin our bedtime routine between 7:30-8:00. And we hope to have them in bed by 8:30. Good luck!

My little one is nearly 21 months. She sleeps from about 8pm to 7:30am (times varies some nights). Then she naps at 10-11am for about 2 hours. She's been sleeping more recently I think she's growing.

I say use what works for your girl, you can even try giving her two naps a day. Wake her after 2 hours, keep her up for 4 hours, then set her down for 2 hours again. Keep the 10 pm bedtime, that way daddy has time to say good night. Stick to the schedule, it will help when your second comes around.

Good luck.

I have a 2 1/2 year old that is on a similar schedule, but we try to get him to bed between 9-9:30 if possible. He takes about a 1-2 hour nap between 1-3pm, but not normally longer than 2 hours. I have to agree that I think if you shorten the nap time, she might be more willing to go to bed a little earlier if that is what will work for your schedule. But like the other moms said, if you want your husband to have some time with her, you might want to let her stay up till he gets home and maybe have the routine be that he helps put her to bed. I do have to say that I like having my husband's help putting the kids to bed, especially with having two and our 3rd due in 3 weeks! It's a lot to do all on your own...especially if you have one that doesn't want to lay down!

My kids all4 are like yours. Usually if I do get them to bed at 9pm they are still up until around 10:30. My two younger ones nap and my 2nd grader naps on the weekends. My kids seem to be normal, happy well adjusted. If your daughter is not acting out or tired, I would say she is fine. I do sometimes envy those parents with kids who go to bed at 7:30pm and sleep for 12 hours and take a nap... however, I would never get rid of all the extra time I get with my kids playing and cuddling. So.....if it helps there is another family wiht "vampire children" LOL like yours.

I would say the first step to try is to cut back on her nap time! Maybe stick to putting her down the same time everyday but just don't let her sleep as late! That I would think would make her tired earlier! My husband too gets home around 8-9pm & my 2 year old son loves to see him so I have finally given up trying to get him down early so that they can have some time together. So I guess you just have to choose which you would rather your child have more. Earlier sleep or time with her daddy?!?! To me that was an easy choice to make! haha Good Luck!!

Hello!

Congrats on your new baby girl arriving soon. I'd like to suggest the book series On Becoming BabyWise. It teaches parents how to get kids on a good schedule to develop healthy sleeping patterns. We have been using it with my daughter whose 13 mo since birth and she sleeps from 7pm to 7am with two daily naps. Also, there is a second book called BabyWise II and a one for toddlers called ToddlerWise. This would be good for the new baby too.

L. :)

Just like adults, kids have their owner personalities. My daugheter, now 14, the minute her head hits the pillow she is asleep. My boy, now 10, has always been difficult to get to bed. Start at 8, asleep by 10:30. Start at 10, asleep by 10:30. Just be consistant. Routine helps.

Maybe you could try waking her up around 6:30am... I know it's early... but just for a little while in the beginning so that she starts going down for an earlier nap. My 16 month old wakes up between 6:30 and 7am ~ he goes down for a nap around 11am. If you could make your daughter's naptime earlier, I have a feeling bedtime would fall earlier as well. If you can get her to nap between 11 and 12, and then let her sleep 2-3 hours, no longer than 3 hrs max... hopefully her bedtime would fall around 8:30pm. I think 4pm is pretty late to be waking up from a nap. My son is almost always up from his nap by 2pm. He's always in bed by 8:30 at the lastest. It's so nice to have time to unwind at night AFTER all the little ones are in bed!

Best of luck to you!

I have the same problem with my 2½ yr. old twins! Ever since they were babies they have had the same bedtime - around 10-10:30. I've rearranged naps and wake-up times so many times and they still consistantly keep going back to the 9-9:30am wake-up, nap at 3 and bedtime later. I was really surprised that they still stayed up until 10:30 the past two days that I didn't make them nap in the afternoon! I put them down at 9:00 and they still played in their cribs and "talked" to each other until after 10.
When my 5½ yr. old was a baby he was a poster child for 7:30am wake-up, 1:00 nap, 7:30 bedtime.
Just goes to show you that different kids have different body/sleep schedules. I wonder if that can ever really be changed? Good luck, but if nothing works for you, I wouldn't stress too much over it because kids know their bodies better than we do!

sounds to me like she is getting enough sleep just not when you want her to, and children like adults are all different and some need more sleep than others. with two kdis it's very important to get them on the same schedual no matter what that is, even to just have then nap at roughly the same times and go to bed within an hour of each other will help you out greatly. other than that it's a matter of when you need the time, i prefer shot naps and early bedtimes, i like my quiet time at night, but if dad isn't getting home till 9 he might like to see his kids and having some help at bedtime is a good thing so teh schedual you are on might be what is best for you, if you want to start getting an earlier bedtime though you are going to have to probally move nap time up and shorten it. from what you said wake up is 7-8 nap time is 2ish, so you have about 6 hours of awake time there, but if you just move bedtime up you are looking at a lot less time spent awake, where right now it seems like she awake about 6 hours after her nap as well. be aware though you could end up with her getting up even earlier if you try to change the schedual, so again it's really just a matter of when you want the down time and what works best for your family. good luck.

I would advice that you move her nap time up during the day or not give her one. Sounds to me like she is getting to much of a nap and when it is bed time she isn't tired. I have an ADHD son, and its very hard to get him to take naps because of his medication. But I give him a nap no later than 1 and wake him by 3pm if he isn't awake yet. His bedtime is 8:00 p.m. Messing with a kids bed time can be a lot of trouble for you later on because it can mess there sleep system up. Be very consistent with it and set your bed time to what you want. I need that two hours to wind down before work the next day dealing with my son. I do not sit in there with him either. I put his night light on and he lays there for a little while and goes to sleep on his own. I found that staying in there with him would make him not sleep because I was a distraction to him.

I hope this helps :)

Maybe you can try to change nap time. 3 hours may be too long. It may make your child couldn't sleep because of long nap? You can try one hour and half or two hours to see if it works.

My son is 16 months old and he too likes to stay up late (his daddy comes home around 11pm or midnight from work) so he can see his daddy. What I've found to help is to cut back on his nap. He only takes 1 a day, so as long as I keep it to 1 hour, he usually will fall asleep by 9:30-10.

Hope you get some answers that will help :)
Good luck with your new little one.

Just a couple of thoughts. You're the mom, you make the rules, not the toddler. I would suggest skipping nap time one day and putting her to bed at 8:30 that night. Make sure she plays hard during the day so she's good and tired by 8:30. Dark curtains, especially given the later daylight schedule, will be helpful. She should still be getting up around 7 to 8 (unless it was the sun waking her up and you put dark curtains in her room) but you'll get more evening together time with your husband. Her naptimes should also be about 2 hours long then during the day and I'd suggest the schedule our daycare has us on, eating lunch between 11 and 11:30 and settling her down for naptime between 12 and 2. That will help with the 8:30 bedtime too. Last suggestion is not sitting in her room reminding her to sleep. You shouldn't need to do that. At her age, you should be able to settle her into a routine where you kiss her goodnight, turn on her nightlight, and close the door. If she gets up or leaves her room, put her back in her bed, and leave. Supernanny, if you watch that, talks a lot about this and has great advice. You can still have a nice routine with her -- bathtime, bedtime stories, prayers, kisses and snuggles, but your being in the room is more of a distraction than a help for her to get to sleep, would be my guess. If you decide this sounds like something you'd like to try, just remember it won't be easy the first few days and will absolutely require consistency on your part, but if you hang in there, your little girl will understand that this is how things are, mommy isn't going to budge, and she'll adjust quickly. And it will really help you once the baby arrives!

Good luck!

My daughter is just over two and is a little girl who doesn't need much sleep and also struggled to go to bed at night. We have found great success by napping her earlier. Sometimes it's inconvenient because it almost cuts into lunch, but it really works. I take her upstairs by 12:15 so she's asleep by 12:30. I wake her up after 1 hour. I know some kids are sleepier and can still do 2-3 hour naps (or naps late in the day,) but if she's staying up that late it really sounds like you need to limit napping. Even though she only naps for an hour, at least I'm getting a little break during the day and she is resting so she's not cranky. Then she's out for the night at a very reasonable hour. It will make the whole family happier if she falls asleep early and easily. It does sound sad that she's missing so much daddy time with him coming home late. Does she get to see him in the morning? That might help.

Well, I agree with you in trying to move her bedtime earlier. And as difficult as it might be, I'd stick to my guns and let her cry it out and fall asleep that way if needed a few nights. If she doesn't actually sleep at least she is getting to bed and getting some 'down' time before she does fall asleep. I also would put her to bed before or right after your husband gets home. I wouldn't keep her up just to see him. It's probbaly in her best interest to get more sleep . Unfortunately that means your husband might not get to see her every night - at least not awake :-)

Good luck!

I've been there with your schedule/concerns :-) I agree with the others who said dd seems to be getting enough sleep (but I do think waking from a nap at 4:30 is tooo long and could be one reason dd is unable to go to sleep earlier than 10:30. Plus, I definitely would want her awake when her daddy comes home! I REALLY understand/remember what it was like to have a 2nd and then a 3rd and wanting some alone time with my husband and even for myself! I would set a goal of 9:30 for bedtime for dd, and a goal of naps from 1:30-3:30 ... for hubby a goal of being home no later than 8:00 :-D
Enjoy and Blessing!

Do NOT wake her up earlier. You will just make the sleep deficit worse. Work on the nighttime bed time. Start pushing it back 15 minutes a day. Don't wake her up from her naps even if it means she sleeps till the next morning. She is way overtired. The bed time should get pushed up to 7 or 8. That may mean she doesn't see Daddy in the evening. Just make sure gets to see him in the morning. My 21 month old daughter goes to bed to bed at 7-8 and gets up around 9. She takes one nap that is 2-3 hours in the afternoon. My 3.5year old sleeps only at night from 7pm-7am. Try the book, "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child". I have used it on all three of my kids and they sleep like angels. Some have been harder to train than others. Everyone always asks why my kids are so laid back and calm and it's totally the sleeping. Sleep begets sleep. Which makes for happy babies and happy mamas and daddy's. You can do it!! Best wishes. Happy Mother's Day.

Horrid as this sounds, if you want her to go to bed earlier than you have to cut back on her nap time. Wake her up after only 2 and 1/2 hours and make bedtime a half hour earlier. Then 2 hours and bedtime a half hour earlier after a few days. Then 1 1/2 hours etc.
She will be crabby for a few days but it will work in the long run.
Don't let her sleep later in the mornings either.
P. R

It sounds like she is getting enough sleep, and personally if she is not giving you to much trouble with going to bed I would keep things the same. My oldest always stayed up late, I always felt bad that he and his dad didn't get enough time together durning the week!! He is 6 now and has two sisters(4&13mos), they all go to bed between 8:30-9:00 during the week, later on the weekends(sometimes I keep the baby up so we can have some alone time!!)

With the new baby coming I wouldn't change to many things for her there is going to be enough change coming, and you don't want her not sleeeping along with the baby!!! You may notice once the baby is here your daughter may eventually start moving to a earlier bed time. I agree with the other mothers though you really want to get the two of them on a similar nap schedule, you are really going to need some down time!!!!

Good luck with everything, I hope this helps you a little.