Sleeping Arrangements

I think it's fine to give them different bedtimes because they are so far apart in age. You could always save 1/2 hour of homework and use that as an excuse as to why he has to stay up.
Also, my kids share bedrooms and I don't allow talking. Their room is dark and they have a cd player playing. If there is talking going on they know they will lose their music.
I also tell them that every time I have to come in there I'm taking 10 minutes off of the next night's bedtime.
Hope this helps,
J.
Mom to 5, ages 7, 6, 5, 4, & 2

Do you think it would work to tell the younger child in advance that if they continue to have bedtime issues, he'll have to start going to bed 30 minutes early? Maybe that would discourage him from participating in play and talking with his older brother. However, if the older boy is going to bed 30 minutes later, it might seem like you're punishing one child and not the other.

Hi C.
I had this same problem. But I put my 6yr old to bed at 7:30 and my 9yr old to be at 8:00 and it usually works out great because they are so tired from school that with out a distraction she is sleeping in 5 minutes. We just told her that her brother is older so he get to stay up later and when she is nine she can stay up later also. Good Luck T.

I think putting the younger son down first is a great idea, and explain to him that when he's 8 he gets to stay up later too, but right now he's going to bed at 8 o'clock rather then 8:30.

I think that it is something the youngest will have to learn to accept. It seems only fair that the older child has a slightly later bed time. My brother is 3 yrs younger than me and he always went to bed before me, probably by about 1 hr. It was nice to have some alone time with my mom before bed, kind of a bonus thing for the oldest child ;)
Good luck!

If you do end up using different bedtimes then just explain that your 8 1/2 yr old gets to stay up later because he's older and because they have a hard time going to sleep when they go to bed at the same time. It won't be the first time the older one gets to do something the younger one doesn't =)

C.,

We stagger bedtimes in our family. Baby goes to bed first. Then I read stories with the 3 year old while 5 and 7 year olds read and do homework. While 3 year old goes to sleep, I read a chapter book to the older ones. Then the older ones slip into their rooms after 3 year old and baby are asleep. It works really well.

Yes, your 4 year old might be mad at first. Part of growing up is realizing sometimes things don't go your way - including getting to stay up as long as older siblings. Maybe you want to keep his bedtime the same, but let 8 1/2 year old stay up 30 minutes as a right of passage or as homework time.

Good luck,
S.