Sleeping - Lynden,WA

The way you put her to sleep has a name, if that makes you feel any better. It's called parenting to sleep--not "putting" to sleep. It is an acceptable parent-child interaction.
That being said, I know exactly how you feel. Once they begin getting older, it's nice to have a tool or two to transition them to sleeping a bit faster, and eventually on their own.
Two wonderful books that may help you shift (without crying!) are Good Nights (Gordon and Goodavage) and The No Cry Sleep Solution Book (Pantley). http://www.breastandbottlefeeding.com/Books-We-Like.php

I do the same thing. My little guy is 22 months. I did this with my older son as well and successfully transitioned hiim into falling asleep on his own, so I think this time it is easier to just enjoy the snuggles.

We slowly establised a routine of bath, brush teeth, 2 books, kisses, bed. When it began we would stay with him and sing or just be there until he fell asleep. Then I began making up excuses like, "I'm going to put clothes in the washing machine, and then I'll be back," or "I need to clean up the dishes, and then I'll be back." Anything so that he knew it was only going to take a few minutes, and then would check on him. At first it would still be awhile before he fell asleep. But after a little while he would be asleep when I got back. Now he does it, no problem (usually).

Elizabeth Panley has a book. So do the Sears doctors. They will give you lots of ideas of things to try. Good luck! Remember, he really will learn to go to sleep on his own, and right now he's feeling your love.

Is your 19 month old sleeping in a regular bed and not a crib? Is so you can lay down with her and watch a movie until she falls asleep. If you can't lay in bed with her you can put a little mat on the floor and lay down with her. You can get the little DVD players and have her watch with you.

Something soothing or you can do easy listening music if you don't want the movies.

N.

Well if I were you I would take it in steps to try to make it as easy as possible. Like make sure you have a good bedtime routine so she knows it's time for bed. Like bath, story, song, rocking, bed. So keep the whole routine the same but for the first few nights only rock her for like 10 minutes. Just to help her still feel safe and cozy. Then say "ok it's bedtime." Lay her in her crib and just stand next to her crib until she falls asleep. This is also known as the super nanny trick and is the way you should go about it if you don't want to do the cry it out method. I am all for the CIO but I know some moms aren't so this works too....it just takes a little longer. So you don't talk to her just stand there so she can see you. If she starts crying or tries to stand just lay her back down, maybe put your hand on her tummy for a few min. But the key is trying to have as little of contact with her once she is in her crib so she will begin to learn how to fall asleep without you there. So after a few nights of this she should start to understand this new routine and fall asleep fine while you are in the room. Once you got this down then stop the 10 min rocking all together. If she's fine with that then you start putting her in her crib but stand by the door until she falls asleep then once she does fine with that you just start putting her to bed and walking right out. Like I said this takes a lot longer then the CIO but if you can stand to let her cry then I would do it like this. It might end up taking a good 2 weeks or so but then she'll be done.

You're right that even if nothing changes, at 5 yrs old, she won't still expect to be rocked to sleep, but she'd still expect to be held and cuddled until she fell asleep. It IS something you will have to teach at some point... It's just a matter of when you want to.

I think the best way would be to teach her that things change as she gets older, but not that you care about her any less. Doing a cold turkey method would make her feel like she did something to drive you away. I'd start by doing your normal routine, but after 15 minutes or so, make up an excuse to need to put her down...something about her being such a big girl works well. She's too heavy, or your arms are sore, or even just that you are tired. Then lay her in her bed and hold her hand. If she is in a toddler bed, you can even still cuddle with her. Stay like this until she falls asleep. This will be your new routine. After a while, only rock while reading. Later, you can leave for short periods of time to do various chores as others have mentioned. You could even sit in her room and read a book.

I think my 7 year old would still enjoy being rocked to sleep! Learning to fall asleep on your own is a very important skill that will get harder to learn the older she gets. It is great you are focusing on it now. I do think it is important to do it gradually and develop a routine maybe with a small amount of rocking time. The more consistent you are, the faster she will transition. At 19 months your child can probably understand a lot more than you realize. Talk to your daughter - tell her the new routine, but explain that after rocking for 10 min or whatever you decide that it is time to be in bed. If she sleeps in a crib it will be easier to transition then once she is in a bed. Turn on calm music (if you keep the CD fairly consistent it will help promote tiredness at bedtime). I like the ideas of others to find excuses to leave for a few minutes. If she knows what you are doing while you are gone it will help ease her curiosity and make her more content to wait. If she is already in a bed, make sure you are consistent from the beginning at putting her back in bed each time she leaves. The first several nights you may be putting her back in bed every two minutes (or more) for a couple hours. It is exhausting, but worth it when they finally learn to stay in bed. Good luck and I hope the transition goes quickly for you!

My older one we put in the crib and stayed in the room while he fell asleep. He is almost 5 and still likes to have some one stay in the room until he is asleep. But he also likes to be around people all day too. My younger one we leave her to fall asleep in the crib by herself (after bedtime and stories). Sometimes she fusses a bit but she usually goes to sleep on her own (she's 25 months now). I'm not sure how she will be when we move her to a bed.

I suggest doing your usual routine with cuddle time and then put her in the crib before she is asleep and stay nearby at first. Hopefully you will be able to make the time you stay shorter a little at a time.