Sleep Deprived More with My 10 Month Old

I suggest some sort of sound, my daughter sleeps better with a fan on or I have a homemedics sound machine, she like the ocean or the rain the best. But who am I to give advice I am still rocking my 13 month old to sleep every time.

I would suggest cutting back to one nap a day- sounds like his clock is off a bit.

Hi
I wanted to response to let you know you are NOT ALONE! My second son didn't sleep through the night until he was 12months old! That was a long year and I really can't remember much because I was so exhausted and depressed! I was so shock because my first son slept through the night at 8 weeks and had very few sleep problems (only when teething or sick). Don't mess with naps and change his rountine at night at once. Too many changes at the same time will really screw him up. If he is waking up at the same time or pretty darn close to the same time every night -- it is habitual waking and has nothing to do with pain/hunger/etc. If it is very sporadic then it could be many things. Overtired babies do not sleep well at night so taking away a nap could cause more problems. If he is waking up at the same time that is like on of the other posters said, you trained him to do that. Now he is programed to be with you. Do what Janie said. If it is spoadic, make sure you get lots of food down him during the day so you are not tempted to feed him. Give tyenol/ ibuprofen if he seems cranky at all. (that was the problem with my second he got 16 teeth between 6 months to 12 months and it caused ear problems because he got so many teeth so fast and it was during winter when the house is dry and germs everywhere- gave lots of medicine and he is fine) Pain doesn't seem to affect their naps as much as a night fr some reason so it could be teething, ear problems still, my second took good naps too and some nights he slept OK and others nights was up a lot. I tried giviing him less naps and it always made night worse. Every child is different and that is why you need to really studied your child and figure out what is going on. Very hard when you are so tired. I wrote everything down, how much he ate, naps how much activity he had, etc to find a clue as to why he didn't sleep well but later I realized it was his teeth and once they were through (only have the 2 year molars to go) he selpt great. If he wakes up at all I simply put his nuk in his mouth, lay him back down and leave. He usually on wakes up at night when his nap was too short or kept him up too late.
Good luck it gets better I promise!

M.

Good Day,
I learned throuh some very good friends that when a child is not sleeping through the night, feed him cereal before bed; and to cut out the napping! If we allow them to nap when they are not sleeping, they will be up half the night! Fill his tummy and try to stop the naps. It will not be easy at first, but gradually take away the nap time; and soon, he will sleep through the whole night! I did this with my own son, when he was a baby; and I did this with my niece who was 6 months old when I got custody of her.. This, they need naps saying is a bunch of malarkey! When your son tries to lay down and sleep during the day, keep him awake. Play with him or whatever it takes; and at bed time-He WILL sleep through the night! Good luck and may God guide & Bless you all..
Sincerely,
Kathy N.

i have the same problem and i've tried cio (didnt work -- couldn't go through with it) and pantley's no cry sleep solution (too weak -- didn't work). finally, i found a book by the "sleep lady". it's called "good night sleep tight" by kim west and it actually is starting to work for me! its crazy -- i didn't think my baby could be "taught" but lo and behold, its happening (knock on wood). of course as we were making real headway, he got sick and so we're on pause with teh program but it's kind of a mix between CIO and the no-cry solution. you basically stay in teh room while he cries but you don't pick him up. google "sleep lady shuffle" and you should be able to find the basics. the best thing is that b/c ur in the room, the baby doesn't get hysterical which i can't stand. its hard going the first few days but if you're consistent, it actually produces results! good luck!

im sorry you are so tired and having so much trouble with your son sleeping.... i know how you feel! my son is an "accept no substitutes" kind of boy, and i chose to cosleep and bedshare with him until he outgrew it on his own, around 17 months he stopped needing to be in our bed all the time, and a month before he turned 3 he wanted to be in his own room, and he still comes to our room around 5 am. i have found that following HIS needs for sleep were much better in the long run than trying to solve the problem by putting myself first. after all, who sleeps while their kid is in the other room crying? no one! (and those who do.... oh the danger their kids are in!)

so i want to encourage you! you will find a solution. the solution is already in you! you know instinctivly what your son needs, and what you and your husbnad need. there are ways to saddle his crib up to your bed ( http://drmomma.blogspot.com/2010/01/turn-your-crib-into-c... )
and you could try other things like going to be earlier, getting up later, taking naps when he naps (when and if you are home during the day).... just finding ways to make it work. its normal for him to want to be near you - what baby wouldnt! its also healthy for him to be near you, it gives him the confidence to decide on his own "i want my own room now". and i cant tell you how good of a sleeper my son is because we listened to his needs.

my husband did and does sometimes still move out of the room if our son is wiggly when he comes to our bed at 5. but he usually gets up for work at 6 anyway. we have made it work, and though it might seem horrid for my husband to be "kicked out of bed" - he prefers to get some sleep than to lay there and listen to our son cry in another room or something. we know the alternatives, and we choose the peaceful ones. :)

im sure that plenty of people will say that hes old enough to cry it out, it will only last 3 nights and it will be fine, but i am always concerned with WHY a baby stops crying after the CIO method. the inventor of the method HIMSELF would not use it on his own kids. the logic says that a baby stops crying then the problem is solved, but at what point do you think the baby realizes "they arent coming to get me so why bother crying".... i fear that no response equals telling your child their communication isnt valid or worthy of response. you will know when they can hold it a little more. my son was around 11 months old when his cries started to change, they were less urgent, and more of a "sure would be nice IF ____ but im ok for a little bit here".... it was instinctual, i heard it and it was definatly different. so just keep listening. some kids might be ready at 10 months, but its up to YOU to decide when that is. dont let anyone tell you how to raise your kid if it doesnt work for your family. :)

find a book called "nurture shock". i havent read it but ive heard a lot about it and its amazing the routine advice given to parents that is totally not made for our normal kids.

and by the way; this doesnt end. when your son is 30 years old, married, has his own home and life, you will STILL lose sleep thinking about him. having children means having less sleep in one aspect or another. you will figure it out. but its always better to listen to your instincts, the needs of your child and family, than to listen to anyone else. :) you have to live with those choices, no one else does. :)

Well, after 4 mos. you have really got him trained to stay up. My just turned two yr old had slept all night from the time he was 3 mos. old. Then, last fall when he was about 16 mos., he started waking up like clockwork at about 2 a.m. I was at my wits end, exhausted, etc. After a couple of weeks I called the doc and asked if maybe there was something wrong. What they told me was that by picking him up and taking him to my bed, or to the living room, or walking with him, this was actually training him to wake up because he got to see mom. They told me that under no circumstances was I to take him out of his bed. I could hug him in his bed, pat his back, console him but then I was to sit back down within his eyesight and read a book or something. After 5 minutes, repeat. Then ten minutes, repeat, then fifteen minutes repeat, etc. until he stopped crying and went to sleep. Next, move out of the room while he is asleep and if he wakes up crying do the whole procedure again just with you sitting out of the room instead of in the room. The office told me that it is very hard and that it could take several nights but it should eventually work. They were right! Took only two nights and he was back to sleeping all night.
However, your child has been doing this for a long time. It might take a while to get him re-trained. You just have to stick with it. Make sure all his needs are met and if there is no other reason for him to be up, console him but do not take him out of his bed. Sleep on the floor in the bedroom for a few nights if you have to before you can move out to the living room or your bedroom. That is what I did both nights I was re-training. Helped me get some cat naps anyway.
I hope this helps!
J.

I would take one of the naps away. Focus on keeping him awake longer and not letting him fall asleep for the earlier nap.
I combined both my kids naps when they were about 8 mo. Instead of two med size naps they took one huge nap. I would put him down at 11 am have him nap until 2 at least. If possible.
It will take at least 3-4 days to change the sleep schedule.
Also I would take him to an allergist or a ear/nose and throat dr. since he is gagging and has the tubes.
Also this sounds silly but when I am dealing with a tough situation..I say to myself this to shall pass. This will just be a memory in 6 months time.

Totally disagree with Kathleen about them not needing naps. Perhaps your son doesn't need two, but children his age needs a nap during the day or otherwise they are sleep deprived which is unhealthy: http://www.babycenter.com/0_naps-the-basics_###-###-####.bc

Also, the very few occasions that my daughter would not nap/could not nap, she did not sleep through the night - she was just more tired the next day.

Babies/Toddlers/Young Children need 11 to 14 hours a sleep a day. I don't know any that get that much sleep just at night. I researched "how much sleep for babies" several months ago and was very glad I did.

Is he too hot? My daughter gets very restless when the temperature is above 76. She also gets restless if her tummy is upset from gas or other tummy issues. Our pediatrician also mentioned that toddlers go through a hormone surge around 2 - 4 am that will sometimes wake them up. I would definitely try to figure out what is making him uncomfortable rather than making him stay awake all day.

Sounds like a time for a little tough love, yeah he sleeps great thru his naps because he is tired from being up all night. I would cut out one of the naps and keep him awake so that when bed time comes he is tired enough to sleep it out. This has become his nightly routine and it is time for it to change. And while this may take a little time to change it around, wouldn't it be better knowing there is a light at the end of the tunnel? I would add a snack at bed time along with a bottle so that he isn't hungry at all when he goes to bed. Try cereal..something that will stay with him for quite a few hours. If he is 10 months he might be starting to teeth and be uncomfortable if that is the case then teething biscuits or even a small dose of tynenol to help the pain may bring immediate relief for both of you. I would stop putting him in bed with you right away!!! Sleeping with parents is never a good idea unless your child is very sick and you want to keep a close eye on them. I read the comment about the baby being in the bed and the boyfriend/husband is now on couch, I wonder how long that relationship is going to last. A bed should represent a place where you and your significant other are together both for sleep and intimacy and just place talking your day out.

Happy Birthday! You're not the only one. My child had sleep issues from about 4 months to about 10 months. I traveled with her a lot and when we were at home she never wanted her crib. So we went through a huge ordeal wth that. At 10 monthes we finially just put her in bed with me, and my boyfriend on the couch. So heres what I did. I learned not to take away their naps because my baby would just get overly tired and cranky and go to sleep earlier then wake up earlier in the middle of the night. I let her take her normal naps, then I would push her bedtime further back. Everyone in our lives disagreed with our choice but it works. So instead of putting my little one to bed at 8, i would push it to 10pm and feed her a cereal bottle to get her tummy full. She would be so tired of playing that she would knock out and sleep for awhile. First it was just an hour longer then normal, then 2 hours longer then normal. Now she's 16 months and sleeps anywhere from 6-10 hrs a night. There are still nights where she gets up at 4am (like last night LOL) but for the most part she's pretty good at sleeping. She also takes 1 hour and a half nap a day still. We also tried CIO, and it didn't work for us. I hope you find what works for you soon, I know having lack of sleep makes you crazy (well atleast it made me crazy LOL). Good Luck!

It's been years since I had babies, but I can feel your pain and exhaustion. You're not alone and it does get better, but it can take time. My two boys had a lot of sleep issues (too many to list here!), but time and Mary Sheedy Kurcinka helped us. I always recommend her book for sleep issues, "Sleepless in America." It can be hard to read when you are exhausted so she also has a website, www.parentchildhelp.com. Maybe you can find her books on tape also. Please don't take the advice to eliminate all of his naps. He is just a baby--he needs a nap! And you need the downtime too. Maybe he is ready for one nap instead of two though. Most babies transition to one nap a little later, but all babies are different. Good luck and happy birthday.

Hi S.. I've been where you are - my son went through a similar stage at that age. I'm sorry to tell you that the only way we could get him to sleep was to let him cry a bit. I felt horribly about it, but, like you, I was exhausted and could no longer manage decent parenting of my son or my four year old daughter without at least a little sleep (not to mention my full-time job) and so it was not really an option anymore... :( I never thought I would let my child cry, so I get it if you decide that's not for you. One thing I would advise, however, is to decide if you are going to let him cry a bit one way or another, and then stick to it!! It is really unfair to him to let him cry for 45 minutes and then go in and pick him up - very confusing.

Good luck.

I dont have any real advice, but the ear troubles and the teeth are probably whats causing it. He will eventually grow out of it. I have a 3 month old who also sleeps till around midnight and is very restless after that. She is very different from my son who was sleeping through the night by 6 months. I dont think she will be for a while and i to have had extremly few nights where i have gotten more than 3 hours of straight sleep since she has been born. Usually its more like an hour or two at a time. after midnight. Very exhausting but you just have to deal with it. It will get easier eventually. I have had a lot of frustrating nights with my little one but she is slowly getting there and i know she wont be 16 and still doing this. Maybe he still has an ear infection even with the tubes and that is causing him to not sleep good. You might want to have it checked out just to make sure. Good luck and i hope he starts sleeping better soon. It is not easy!