Set Back in Potty-training.

First get her child's book about potties and flushing. One title to check is "Flush!An Ode to Toilets" by Charlie Williams. (Find at amazon.com and is a silly poem about "flushing a toilet").

Or try "It's Potty Time" by Ron Berry (find at most Target Stores) This book literally flushes, and has a giggling childs voice in the background.

Then consider making up a game out of "flushing the potty." Give her a few things that are fun but safe to flush down the potty like cheerios, tissues, etc, but let her do it so she can see for her self she will be safe.

Make a point of telling things go down...they do not come back up. She's probably thinking the spider is still hanging out in the potty, and she might have to see it again. Perhaps if she gets the idea that things that go down, go for good she might not be so afraid.

The only downside of the "flushing" game idea is she might like it so much, she'll want to put everything down the toilet..and you know what that could mean. Use discretion on this of course!

I had to read all your responses to get my own advice:) My daughter is 2 almost 3 in June. She 6 months ago wanted to sit on the potty. She went once in the potty chair and once in the toilet. She loved to wipe herself with toilet paper and drop it in the water. Then one night, while she was taking a bath she had an accident. She had pooped in the tub. My husband got too excited about it and made her get out fast. He kept saying "gross" and freaking out about it. Then he decided to empty out the water, scrub down the tub, and put her under the shower to wash her off. That freaked her out so badly that she screamed everytime we talked about taking a bath, sitting on the potty, or evenchanging her diaper. She now loves her bath again, doesn't mind getting her diaper changed, but still gets scared anytime we even ask her if she wants to use the potty like mommy does. We do not bring it up very often, but just keep testing the waters every so often to see if she is ready. She loves potty books! She loves to play with toilet paper! She hates being wet or dirty, but she is still scared to use the potty. She says "No, Not today!" My advice to you would be to not make a big deal of it, let it go for a couple days, ask her if she is ready to use the potty, and if not just say "that's ok." And let it go. Eventually she will get past her fears. Another thing you can do is to replace her diapers with cloth diapers, training pants, or regular underpants. She may have a lot of accidents, but just keep changing her everytime and don't make a big production of it, and maybe she'll want to go on the potty sooner than you think. It's really not a big deal to dump poop out of pants and throw them in a bucket full of soap to soak and then throw them in the washing machine. We eventually need to do this anyway when they are 4 and have an accident. Good luck with the potty training! If you want send me a note on how she's doing. Maybe that will get me some good ideas to help mine along too:)

I am a 38 year old SAHM with 2 beautiful girls, 4 and 2 and a superb husband. I would say, even though it is a set back, I wouldn't worry about it. It seems to be clearly related to the spider and once you let it go and let your daughter choose to start going on the potty again in her own time .... she will do it. I know this in not easy because we all want to be rid of diapers. Maybe a way to help is to not pressure about going on the potty and to focus on her fear of spiders and helping her past it. Get a couple books about "good, friendly spiders. Miss Spiders Sunny Patch series comes to mind. A great series with the main character being a mother spider who has "adopted" many other types of bugs and as a family they help each other through a variety of daily issues. Very age appropriate, by the way. We have a bookcalled "Be nice to spiders" by Margaret Bloy Graham and through a fun story it teaches children how beneficial spiders are and that they are not scary but just doing thier part. My 4 year old daughter loves this book and it is often requested for a bedtime story. She recently stopped her preschool teacher from killing a spider by telling her how good spiders are. They decided to let it go outside. Hope this helps...we went through a similar set back with the 4 year old and we just had to let her decide in her own time when to start again on the potty (it was about 4 months time but it took in about 2 days). Good luck! Training the almost 2 yrs now and hoping for no setbacks ourselves.

Congrats on getting her so far so early! The fact that she was waking up w/ a dry diaper indicates that her body is really ready (yeah, the potty pooping can take a long time, even after peeing is routine.) Have you asked her why she doesn't want to go in the potty anymore? She's just old enough that she might be able to tell you.

Whatever you do, don't force the issue, that almost always leads to control battles. Let her lean on the pull-ups for a little while - I think the "fear of being flushed" could be a good part of what's going on. Meanwhile, read lots of potty books (our favorites were "You Can Go to the Potty" by the Drs. Sears and Let's Go Potty by Moira Butterfield and Peter Utton - both very matter-of-fact, low-pressure, focusing on the logistics and making it all feel very normal and not a big deal.) Even just backing off and letting her come back to it on her own terms might be enough.

Good luck!

I think your daughter has been a bit traumatized by the spider incident and somewhere in the back of her beautiful head she fears the same ramifications if she goes anywhere near it. She's old enough...talk to her. Tell her it was a good way to make sure the spider doesn't come back, just like what her body wahts to get rid of. I wish you well!

Hi K.
I have heard that sometimes children will not use the potty because they think they will be flushed away if they use it.
unfortunatly I do not have any advice on how to fix this problem. If you go on-line and type in potty traning you may be able to find some really good books. Good Luck :)T.