Seeking responses...and Some Help??

Updated on May 10, 2008
S.N. asks from Tucson, AZ
6 answers

I have a four year old boy who at two was using the bathroom by himself and when we brought Lucy home, he regressed. This has been going on for two years now...he will not use the potty. He fell and injured his privates last year and he is very sensitive about his area still. Please help. I have five kids and this is uncharted waters...I don't get it. Please help????

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L.S.

answers from Phoenix on

Hello S.,

I feel for your situation. It is normal for a child to regress when it comes to a new sibling. It seems like it has gone on too long though. Have you talked to your Dr. about it? I get the whole family involed when it comes to potty training. Whoever gets brother to go potty gets a treat ( brother too) Try talking to your son about why he doesn't want to go potty. A four year old can share feelings pretty well. It could be as simple as getting a new potty that no other sibling has used. He gets to chose it. Good luck and hang in there.

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C.D.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi S.,

My daughter was 2 1/2 when my son was born, and to top it off, my son had surgery at 2 months old. Needless to say, potty training came to a screeching hault!!!

So, we tried many things . . what finally worked was putting her on the toilet every 15 minutes and making her try to go. (It also helps if you LOAD them up with their favorite drink on this day). The next day, we spaced it out to every 30 minutes, etc. The third day every 45 minutes. You should be able to tell by the diaper/pull up how often your child is going. Also, when you do this, put him in big boy underwear. If he should have an accident, you will know right away rather than in the pullup which draws the wetness away from the skin. You can adjust your timing by knowing when the accidents happen!
Everytime my daughter was successful, she got to put a star on a chart for #1, and a bigger sticker on the chart for #2. The chart was a calendar I quickly made on some posterboard. She got to put all the stars for that day into the appropriate day's square. When daddy came home, he looked at the chart and praised her for all the times she went potty that day.

I know it sounds like a big pain - my 2 year old is about to go through it. I just haven't gotten the motivation to do it with him, so we are procrastinating.

Good luck!!! It's great when they can go by themselves, just make sure to monitor the cleaning habits also!!!

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K.S.

answers from Tucson on

Just a suggestion, if your other child is currently potty training, you may see if he could be her helper. Have him teach her how to use the potty.. Make it his job to take her in to the bathroom and first show her, look how brother does it then.. maybe tell him he needs to teach her differently. It posses a challenge to him. It may be fun and exciting to him, to help... and with out knowing it he will start using the potty again himself. It may be challenging with a little gender difference...lol.... but I think big brother would be a great little teacher. I know with my three sons anytime there is a bit of a challenge involved they seem to respond quicker.. Its a guy thing..lol.. Good luck been there done that, when I brought my third son home...its not easy mom but it is doible.

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K.S.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi S.,
Maybe you could make it into a game. We put Cheerios in the toilet for our boys to "aim" at. We had them try to sink them. They loved it--and it keeps them focused--but they don't feel the "pressure" to perform. Maybe a small treat for each Cheerio he hits or something!Good luck!
K.

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K.P.

answers from Phoenix on

Has he regressed in any other areas? Are you sure that it was Lucy coming home that caused the regression? I know with my kids I had a child right at the time that I noticed regression with my kids (one 2 the other 3 1/2). It ended not being related at all to the new baby, but to my children having developmental problems. If you have other concerns (or those around you have other concerns) than you may consider calling your school district and ask him to be evaluated for development/Child Find.

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W.B.

answers from Flagstaff on

i wish i had some advice but i guess just take it slowly.I know that my daughter had accidents for 2 years during and after her dad's and i divorce.We brought her home for school(which you already do) and it helped a lot.i guess just be patient with him and also maybe go have him checked by a dr.if he did fall and hurt himself.poor kiddo

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