I Have a 12 year old daughter. who wont go to school for me. she has miss so much school. i have try everything to get her to go. but i dont seem to get anywhere with her. i have ask for help from the school and also the education welfare. but all they want to do is to take me to court. which is goin to happend after christmas. for all the people i have ask for help doesnt seem to want to know. no matter how much i have told them that i have try time and time again to get my daugther to school. its like they brush it over there heads or even just close there ears to it. they dont seem to understand how hard it is when you have a 12 year old who just doesnt want to listen. all they have put down in the court pappers is tht i have failed has a mother. PLEASE HELP. Ematernaghan. many thanks.
You get her up, get her ready, take her to school, walk her in, hand her over to the principal! After enough days she will know you mean business and find it is less embarrassing to ride the bus.
Why are you letting her have all this control? Why are you trying to get the school and police to do your job?
I agree with Jo W. Take her arse in there yourself every day, deliver her to the principal. When she "disappears" out of school without your assistance, you can tell the principal that you got her there, and it's their job to keep her there until day's end.
You also need to find out if she is being bullied, if she has bad friends that are encouraging her to ditch, if she's depressed because former friends are ignoring her for popularity.
Soon enough, you'll find out what's going on, then you can get counseling for what comes after. It's not easy, but in the long run, worth it.
Take care Mama!
My sister had the same problem with her daughter. It can be difficult to make an older kid do what you want them to do.
You and the school have to investigate why she doesn't want to go to school.
Is she being bullied?
Is she afraid of something?
Does she have a learning disabilities that has not been diagnosed?
Is she depressed?
Once you identify the reason, you can work with the school and counselors to help your daughter get to school.
after a long 2 years of battling over school, my niece is finally going and getting A's. She was severely depressed and getting bullied. After, intervention from the school, counseling and medication she is now doing well.
You need more help than we can give you.... you need counseling as a family, and especially for your daughter.
What has happened in her life that she is refusing to go to school? Does she not care about consequences? Has life outside school become so wonderful that she prefers that to school?
You have to figure out what her "tipping point" of consequence or reward could be to figure out a way to get her back to school.
Another option would be to home school (assuming your a stay at home mom). But even if you go that route, you need to find out why your child hates school so much. If she is having trouble academically, she may have a learning disability. She could have had a falling out with her friends, be teased, bullied, have a teacher who is a bully, or just be having a hard time going through puberty.
I'm sorry -- I don't understand your title and I'm confused on some of your letter. Are you seeking money? Monday? And what is Ematernaghan? Is that your name? At any rate, if her separation anxiety is so severe she needs counseling. If she is so defiant that she "just doesn't want to listen" then she may have oppositional defiance disorder. Either way, the school will not be able to provide the level of mental health services she needs. I would talk to her pediatrician.
