Rsvp/texting

Hmmm, I seem to have the opposite problem. I am delegated the task of thanking everyone, congratulating everyone and gifting everyone with no input from my hubby. I would welcome it if my husband wanted to become more involved in gift-giving, as it shows that he is thoughtful. Just my 2 cents.

You can look at it that way, but I think it is kind of cool that he is so generous.

Just speak with him and let him know when he goes the extra mile, it makes you feel like he does not think you are doing enough..

Communication is an amazing thing. It can open both of your eyes..

Well, you'll never know til you ask him, I guess.

You: Hon, I really appreciate that you take the time to do X, but since I already did YZ, sometimes it makes me feel inadequate.

Him: I didn't know you felt that way. I'm sorry I just want to do something nice too.

You: How 'bout this? Next time, we'll discuss it TOGETHER and come up with an idea we BOTH agree on before the fact!

Him: OMG, you're a GENIOUS! I love you SOOOO much!

(Well, it could happen, right?!)

:)

*** YES she changed her question to this RSVP/Texting one. Her first question, was she was highly offended and hurt that her husband gave second gifts to people such as co-workers (they work at the same company). For instance they got some people baby gifts, and her husband went and got some extra diapers to add to the gift, and the only way she found out was b/c it was included on their "thank you" letter. She thinks he is demeaning her and making her feel like a "total stranger" as if what she gives isn't enough.
****************************************************************************

Honestly, I'm impressed. My husband doesn't even get is own parents gifts or anything, I have to remind him to call them on their birthdays/mother's day and fathers day.

I think maybe you are reading too much into this and getting offended. Do you always seek his approval before sending off a card or gift? Why does he need yours?

Does he do anything else that makes you feel any less? Does he treat you poorly and insinuate you don't do enough? It doesn't sound like it unless you are leaving things out. Because if not, this sounds pretty weak to me. I'm thinking maybe you have some self confidence issues or have problems with feeling undervalued in different ways, and it is just manifesting with this gift thing.

I would encourage you to calmly and genuinely discuss this with him. Some people are naturally generous, it doesn't mean he's trying to insult you. Either way, it's best to get this out and communicate since it's obviously bothering you.

I think you should give him a big kiss and tell him what an awesome husband you have! Tell him that he is so generous, and that you think he's amazing. Think the best of him and run with it! Don't borrow trouble by looking for negative reasons for his generosity.

Hi there! If it bothers you that much just bring it up to him. Atleast you'll get some insight into his logic. I do see what you mean though, it might even seem border line, insulting. But it's not the end of the world, and it does seem Like he's a kind thoughtful person.

???? The answers below don't jive with this question. If you have another question, make another post.

was he raised that "more is better"? Maybe he thinks just a little bit more is better. I was raised kind of that way too. My husband always says "that is enough" and I always want to do more. While it is not right for him to do it behind your back, I'd cut him some slack. He's not doing anything really that bad, but he should be discussing it with you too. At least he's not a cheapie.

Its a co-workers baby... thus, as a co-worker, he probably felt the obligation to add more things to the gift... as compared to others in the office and what they may have gifted, too.
Co-workers, talk/gossip, in the office.
And this is a co-worker of your Husband, so maybe he felt that it was 'his' responsibility to get the gift, too.
In addition to what you got, together.

Office dynamics, are not always so pleasant.

He did take responsibility for gifting.
Which many Husbands just expect the wife to do it, and they have nothing to do, with it, themselves.

You both, work in the same office???

But sure, he could have... told you his thoughts, & reasoning for it and him buying more things.

Or, you can simply TELL him, and ask him about it and why he did so.

There must be some Italian in his background, lol! My husband is somewhat the same, mostly when we entertain he makes sure there are pounds and pounds of meat per person when a normal person would not eat more than half a pound, several choices of dessert when I think one apple pie is fine, heavy tipper (more than 20% at times or even a high amount for mediocre service), etc. etc.

There are answers that seem to go to another question. I am gathering this question that I am seeing got mixed up with another. Anyway, what I see is if it is tacky to text after you already responded and I think it's just possible they don't remember. I think it is more tacky for people to send thank you's for presents for graduation gifts and wedding gifts or actually no thank yous at all. Your question just indicates it is annoying that they didn't mark down (unless it is a surprise party for you, haha!)

Kinda, maybe they forgot?

Absolutely. I do not beleive texting should be used for invitations or RSVP.