Hi Moms,
My hubby is starting med-school in July! :) So proud! Lots of changes though. We're selling our home, moving closer to the school (local-ish move) renting instead (best option for us now). Our son will start Kindergarten in the Fall. I'm looking for a job as well.
Can anyone recommend resources for the med-student wife/mom so we can all stay sane, focused, etc? I know it's hard and want to do my best to make things work as well as possible. This is a 2nd career for hubby, so we're not young kids just starting out. We've been around the block a bit experience-wise, but I want to put a foundation in as quickly as possible, for all our sakes :)
EDIT: the school DOES have a group, but it's not on the website. They have a booth at the "White Coat Ceremony" which is the kick-off for med school. I'm definitely going to check them out, but would love input from other moms who have or are going through what we're about to embark on :)
Thanks!
Thank you mamas, keep the info coming. His current career has caused crazy long hours, and he's been working out of state for the last few months, so actually, this time has probably prepped us for what is to come. It's pretty much how we've been doing things anyway. I found some online resources, but hope to connect with actual people, and the school is DO, so I think there may be some more non-traditionals there to bond with (hopefully).
Med-student wife resources, is that something different than any other mom resources? I mean are you looking for something outside of the normal hours? Not sure exactly what your looking for.
How about making friends with other med-student wives over the normal daily mom things. I'm not saying giving up other mom friends but when your hubby starts doing long hours in the hospital, it would be nice to have someone who can truly empathize.
Have you contacted the school? I wood think that is the best place to start.
Congratulations to your husband for being accepted into Medical School. It is a HUGE accomplishment.
My husband is entering his 4th year of medical school this summer. It is his 2nd career and he is in his mid30s. Our kids are 1 and 4.
Because my husband is nontraditional most of his classmates are in their early 20s and don't have kids or even spouses so that cannot relate to what life is like being in med school with a family. It has made it hard for me to make any connections within his school. This is frustrating as I it would be nice to commiserate with someone who understands what I am going through. Hopefully your husband's school is bigger and you meet other spouses that are similar.
Though the schedule in Med School isn't too demanding in the beginning, what is demanding is the amount of studying they need to do, especially if they want to honor their exams. My advice to you is get used to spending a lot of time alone just you and your child. Be ready to do most of the childcare, cooking and cleaning alone. I think if you can have low expectations for the amount of time he can give you and your child then you won't have resentment towards him later. I hope I don't sound like a downer my husband is a great father and husband he just cannot devote as much time to us as a "normal" father/husband could. I think if my expectations were lower our adjustment to the med school life could have been smoother. Since my husband's school didn't have a spouse group I found Mom's groups on meetup and keep my boys and I really busy with playdates and other activities.
My husband has a classmate that is married with a new baby. He is barely passing his exams and won't get into a good residency because he doesn't study enough to get the scores he needs to be successful. My husband, on the other hand, studies a lot and is top of his class. Though he is gone a lot I'm so proud of him and I'm glad our children will see what determination, hardwork and perseverance look like :)
Blessings on this new journey in your lives. Find outlets right away and it will make the transition easier.
I am finishing up graduate school and the university I attend has a family resource center. I signed up for their weekly e-mails which list upcoming events like story times, movie showings and other activities. Our family, friends and neighbors have been wonderful and supportive resources. My husband has also been extremely helpful. Two weeks before my Master's Portfolio was due he took our daughters up north to visit family for the weekend. Maybe when your son begins Kindergarten you will make new friends in similar situations or just new friends to spend time with. Best of luck to you and your family!
