Picky Eaters - Billings, MT

Dear A.,

After my daughter spent almost a week at my parents house while we were on vacation, we had a similar experience. What I came up with that really worked well was take a pakage of m & m's and after every BIG bite of 'real' food she would get one m & m. After she got used to that we increased the big bites to two or three. You could switch it around to whatever candy you chose. Now, she only gets a 'yummy' after she eats a good meal. I hope that helps. Good luck, and I think you are doing a wonderful thing by being a foster mom, props to you!

N. C

First I think that you should just call her your daugter if you addoptid her than that's great, but how you typed that message sounded like you don't consider her your daughter.
I am not trying to be mean at all and I hope that you don't take it that way.
As for the picky eater, DON'T give her any candy if you stop the candy all togeather, she will start to eat foods that you give her.

I don't mean to sound rude or mean, I really don't, but she is 5, if you don't want her to eat candy, you do not give her candy. period. not as a bribe or a reward, or anything. Someone has malnourished this child, and she needs HEALTHY food! 100% whole wheat grains, vitamin rich, protein rich foods! If she is hungry, she will eat what you give her.
Start with smell-wonderful foods like foods you really cook and they make the house hungry til it is done: spaghetti, for example, and add shredded cheddar on top...
Breakfasts, make her oatmeal with a little brown sugar- much healthier than a sugar cereal- pancakes with syrup- much better than frozen waffles or pop-tarts, scramble eggs, mix them with stuff if she won't eat them.

Oh, and I found a great way to hide veggies- chop up steamed broccoli and cauliflower really really small, mix into rice, then stir in a big spoonful of like cream of mushroom soup or something, heat up in the microwave for a minute, and walla- you have healthy that tastes yummy and you can't see the veggie chunks.

Hope this helps- hope I haven't written too much to read here.

Have her help you make it and make it fun L. Clapp
L.'S CHILDCARE

my daughter was like that too and still is all I do is I will put down her favorite foods and if she eats great if not well that is ok. I asked my doctor and he said that give them peanut butter sandwiches and anything with protein in it make sure they get alot of fluids too. My 3 year old eats nothing but air sometimes for about 2 days and then he will eat. Remember they will eat when they are hungry. All of my kids are under in thier weight for there age group and I don't worry because they are healthy.

Perhaps you can try to not offer any candy anymore and choose some healthy sweet things like fruits to interest her. There are some great kids recipe books out there with great recipes that are balanced meals and ones that pickey eaters would love. Perhaps only offer candy as a reward.

Hi! I have 2 kids and they like to help in the kitchen. In fact, my daughter loves to watch Rachel Ray on TV! Have you tried picking out an easy meal with your daughter and letting her help make it. Maybe since she worked so hard on that "mac and cheese" she might really love to dive in and eat it all!

Best wishes!

Hi A. here's some tips.

My experience is 3 preemies, one with 4 surgeries, constant illness fighting (while trying to get her to eat) I also raised my niece and have recently adopted a little guy - both not preemies.
1. You can not make children eat, sleep, or potty. But you can encourage.
2. offer child size portions, what fits in their hand - not yours.
3. Remember that we are supposed to eat 6 small meals a day and that one of those meals can be an apple, banana, yogurt ... you get the idea.
4. Fluids to help keep your child hydrated make a difference and water is the best. Remember fruit group from fruit is best not juice, but we do use juice because it keeps our daughters sugar at a good level.
5. We do not use chocolate milk mix, we use ovaltine - it has more vitamins.
6. Sectioned trays or plates keep food separate and does not look like some massive pile of food, and they are fun!
7. Include your child in meal decisions - broccoli or green beans? Peanut butter or bologna & cheese. If they don't like the choices you say I am sorry that is all we have but if you want something different I'll try to get it the next grocery trip, so which do you want today a or b?
8. Cookie cutters and food coloring are a beautiful thing! We use a pastry cutter by pampered chef for sandwiches (we don't even start w/ the crust fight). Aspic cutters (mini cutters in fun shapes) are great for sliced beets, cheese, bologna ...
9. Sit w/ your child and talk about things other then the food (unless its positive talk)
10. We have a candy drawer and in it is a set of 4 ball jars. In e. jar is a bite size treat,jelly beans, m&m s, skittles. Offer a reward if you eat all your dinner you can pick 5 treats - our daughter is 5 and 5 yr. olds take 5 bites (of e. food) so they get (5 jelly beans etc.) We are up to 5+5 bites - still only 5 treats though.
11. Remember bribery stops an undesirable behavior already in progress, rewards are offered before any bad behavior can begin. If you eat your dinner you can pick from the treat drawer.
12. PicNics on the kitchen floor are a great way to introduce a new food.
13. Oh and when I make our dinner, I do try to plan ahead to have a kiddy version at the same time and when my daughter says, I am not eating that I say no this is grown food - I have your's over here special for you and the baby, but when your grown then you will try this - it's so yummy!
14. Food variations, macaroni product is enriched so we offer orzo (tiny rice shaped pasta I recently found little ball shape)and alphabet pasta the 9 month old likes his with basil pesto and the 5yr. old likes hers with margarine.
15. We did have to do one big prize after 14 days of smiley faces (along w/ her meal treats) to get her back to eating. And we only did ONE big prize!
16. Vitamins increase some children's appetite - you may try that. Also I've been told there is something at the health food store that will increase there appetite, I believe it is a fruit derived "drink".

Try to let her make the menu. Let her pick a protein a starch and a vegetable. And then make her feel proud about picking them. I have three picky stepchildren and one daughter and I let them do that and they love it that they helped pick the what they were going to eat. hope this helps...

I would remove the candy from the equation. If it's not an option, then she'll have to eat something else. Even if you start with something like oyster crackers. if you make PB&J let her pick a cookie cutter to cut a shape out. Can do the same with grilled cheese. if she helps make it, she might be more inclined to eat it.

My son loves to help make homemade pizza, from rolling the dough to the toppings. He can hardly wait during the cook time.

*****
We just had an awesome speaker for playgroup about child eating habits. She works with in-patient at Blanks. She talked specifically about picky eaters. Basically, that kids will model what we eat, that if adults eat well children will grow into good habits. if candy is the issue, then don't even have it around, don't buy it. When we sit to meals, kids may pick and choose, but don't be surprised if they don't "eat everything". Having a strict eating/snack schedule is good. Get rid of grazing. Kids need the hunger feeling in order to eat. Then they eat just enough to not feel hungry and go back to playing. They don't have to eat till their "full". If you are offering balanced choices, then they will over time learn to eat. If she says she's not hungry, then evaluate what may have sabotoged her hunger patterns earlier.

You could always use it as a bribe! Have her eat half a sandwhich (PBandJ) and then tell her that when she is done she can have a piece of candy. PLUS there are a lot of sugar free candies out there. She may prefer sweets so try fruit and juices. I use to babysit for two little girls who were way too small! Three days a week they got several snacks through the day and the other days they had to eat the three meals. They barely ate anything at the meals!

I agree with Aimee, try bridery. Yes its not a great way to teach healthy eating, but it worked with my son. First try having her taste different food, and when she does, reward her with a piece of candy. When she gets really good at tasting, then up the ante and make it that she has to eat at least one food off of her plate completely. When she has that down pretty good, then up again with no candy until your plate is clean. Cookies work great with this too. Another one I use with my son is no TV, Gameboy or anything electronic if he doesnt clean his plate. Use any variation you like best for your daughter. When you do give her a meal, try including fruits that came in a can for now. They have lots of sugar free or with splenda that is much healthier too. Some days that is all I can get my 2 yr old to eat when she is not having a growth spurt. One clever snack idea that my kids love is what I call Gorp. I mix plain healthy for you cereal like chex, raisins, peanuts, marshmellows, and some kind of chocolate like m&ms. They cant have more of the sweet until they eat all of the rest. You can use any of those things, you dont have to use them all, and you can use as many different types of cereals as you like, even combine some of the marshmellow cereals with the healthy for you ones. Its a fun snack for the kids and they get a combination of junk and healthy without really noticing. I hope some of this helps. Another great place is allrecipes.com. They have lots of kid friendly recipes that are very healthy as well. Good luck!