My 14 month old has used a pacifier since he was born, especially for sleeping. Four days ago during the tropical storm I couldn't find any of his pacifiers and I wasn't about to go out in that weather to buy one, so I decided it was the perfect time to start getting rid of it. It's been 4 days now and I have to say during the day when he's playing he's fine barely remembers, but come nap time and night time and it's a whole different story. He has always been easy when it came to sleep time, I just put him in his crib and he would go to sleep on his own. Now that he doesn't have the pacifier I have to rock him to sleep (which I don't mind)but it sometimes takes 45min and he's waking up in the middle of the night and has a hard time going back to sleep. For the last 3 nights I have been up 3 and 4 times for periods of 30min at a time to rock him back to sleep. Am I doing the right thing by taking the pacifier away completely? Should I give it to him at night or will that confuse him? How long does it usually take them to get over the pacifier? My other 2 children never used pacifiers so this is completely new for me. Please help!
Let me know what you find out my son is almost 2 I don't know how to even start the process of taking it away!!!
www.DiscoveryToysLink.com/LisaRyan LisaM
My daughter used a pacifier and the one day took it out (6 months) and never used one again. It just will take a little time for him to self soothe. Another possibility is (my friend does this with her son) to put a pacifier only in his bed/crib and that is the only place he uses it. Every child is different and it is good to go what you feel from him. This may be a good time to stop it all together, like you said...when they get older it gets more difficult.
He's a baby....let him have his pack. They need to suckle,it brings them comfort while they process all that they are experiencing.
A nurse practitioner friend of mine and mother of twins told me she cut a little hole in the pacifier at first then a day or two later make the hole a little bigger and keep going until your toddler loses interest. It removes the "sucking" feeling and they don't want it anymore. I have a six week old and plan to try it when we get to that point. I hope it works.
Hi. I took my son's pacifier away at 11 months, the earlier the better. He had a difficult time at nap time and bed time too, but it only lasted about 2 1/2 weeks. He took to a little stuffed elephant and that helped sooth him. Stick to it; you'll be glad you did so now rather than later.
I have 3 children, daughter 12 going on 30, son 11 and son 6. My daughter loved the paci, so much so that she had one in her mounth and one in each hand. I did not take it away from her, she gave it up herself. She went to school when she was 2 and was not allowed to take it, so that eliminated the day time usuage, but as soon as she got in the car, in went the paci. One day I was brushing her teeth and told her she was beginning to look like a rabibit because of the paci. She did not like that. It was around Christmas time and we had a large Santa next to our tree.I told her she should give the paci to Santa to give to a little boy or girl that didn't have a paci. She did and that was all it took! My middle son never took the paci, but my youngest did, just as bad as my oldest. He was 3 1/2 and still would not give up his paci, but one day he got a cold and a running nose. Breathing is very difficult with a paci and a running nose, so he had no choice but to give it up. By the time he was over his cold he was over the paci. Every now and then he would ask for it and I would remind him what a big boy he was and I would distract him from it.
I never wanted to force them to give something up or train them to do this or that. I figured she/he would give it up on his own time, as long as it was within reason, and for our family it worked out okay.
Follow what you feel in your heart is right for you child and your family. You can get advise from both sides leave or take it away, but in the end, what works for you and your child is what you should do. Pick you battles and as long as you are all happy with your choices, (includiung your kids) you'll do fine.
Good luck!
H.
He is now substituting you for the pacifier. It is normal for many of us to have some wakeful moments during the night (including kids) so when your son used to wake up at night he either had the pacifier in his mouth or it was close by and he could pop it back in and be comforted right back to sleep. Now that he does not have that, you are rocking him to sleep, he wakes up and you are not there still rocking him, so it's upsetting and he does not know how else to self comfort. As hard as it is, you have to break the cycle. Let him cry, but go in at 5 min, comfort him by talking, rubbing his back, etc for a couple of minutes then leave and don't return until 10 min later, then 15 min later...and so on (The Ferber method). He has to find a way to comfort himself when he wakes if you want to be able to sleep through the night.
I have been there and it is rough, but be consistent and you will get through it (and pretty quickly, if again, you are consistent).
You've gone this far to keep it from him, I'd have to say keep it from him for good. It will only confuse him if you give it back. Tell him the pacifier went bye-bye for forever. You are seeing first hand how difficult it is to break a habit. It's better to start now than to have him walking around with a pacifier in his mouth when he's 4 years old. I've seen children older than that with a silly pacifier. I never introduced a pacifier to any of my 3 children so honestly, I don't know how long it will take for him to get used to this new habit you have now introduced. Just don't give it back to him.
Dear M.
Don't give in. As a child gets older they remember so its harder. It may take a week. I took my sons away at 6 months old and he forgot all about it within 3 days. One thing I did do was get him a small stuffed animal (we call him wormie) for nap and night time and that helped him a lot. You may want to take him to a store and pick out a special sleep buddy and explain to him that he is a big boy and doesn't need a pacifier. Also my son loves Twilight Turtle that projects stars on the ceiling and he loves to count them and look at them.
I know its hard because you are getting bad sleep but it will pass. He just needs to sleep on his own.
Good Luck
M.
You are now soothing him back to sleep by rocking him instead of him using the pacifer which will become a habit for him. I don't believe the wanting to be rocked will just end, but only stay the same or get worse so think about whether that is what you prefer to do. Maybe taking the pacifier away all day and night was too much. Maybe just tell him it has to stay in the crib and can only be used for naps and nightime. Then he can get back to putting himself to sleep. Then maybe after some months you can try to take it away again at naps first then night time or all at once. Replace the pacifier with an object he can soothe himself with when he wakes up - teddy bear, blanket, etc. Or one of my friends had a bye-bye paci party with her kid (who was about 2) - she had cake, ballons and they sang songs then put the pacifiers in a cup and threw them out. She said that totally worked for her. Good luck.
Hi, M.. Well, I think it's a little bit early to be worried about when to get him off the pacifier. He's just over a year old, and at that age, they really need soothing behaviors that they are used to. The fact that he has sleep disturbances since being suddenly "weaned" from the pacifier says to me that it's causing him a lot of stress and anxiety. If I were you, I would give it back to him, but only at sleeping times. Let him get back into his old routine, and then see if he wants to give it up at a later time. The pacifier will not hurt him unless he sucks on it continuously all day and all night; that's not his pattern, so I don't think you need to worry about letting him use it.
I also think that the timing was unfortunate, losing the pacifier on the same day the storm hit, so he might associate the storm with the loss of the comforting pacifier
-- it doesn't seem like much to us adults, but on that day, his life changed significantly -- and you might even find that he starts becoming anxious or afraid during storms! He might start to wonder what else he's going to lose when the wind blows hard and the rain hits the roof! It's always better to make a transition in the most gentle way possible, and not in a time of worry, stress or some other emergency.
So I would get him another pacifier. I don't remember what the normal guidelines are for when to start coaxing him away from it, so I hope you ask your pediatrician at what age you should become concerned about his using it. I think that a gradual change is WAY better than a sudden and forceful one in any baby's life, so I would give him a lot more time to grow out of it.
Bear in mind that if he's feeling anxiety and stress over the loss of the pacifier, he could develop habits and symptoms WAY worse than sucking on a pacifier!
Peace,
Syl
