Not Encopresis in Child

I also wondered, like MilitaryMom6, if it's anything school-related. For some kids the school environment causes anxiety - bullying, lack of privacy in the bathrooms (actual or perceived), feeling rushed (hurrying to eat or get to recess or get in line, leaving very little time to go to the bathroom), etc. Anxiety can manifest itself in a lot of ways.

If I were you, I would keep track of these soiling incidents on a calendar (a private one, just for you and your husband). Just observe, quietly, what days or times these incidents happen. You may see a pattern.

I'd also note, on the days the soiling happens, what foods or drinks your son had. Does he eat or drink anything with artificial sweeteners or anything that is called "sugar free"? In some children, those things (sweetened with sorbitol, erythritol, aspartame, Splenda, sucralose, etc) can cause intestinal upsets. My daughter has been unable to have even a piece of sugar free gum since she was little due to the intestinal pain and other digestive and intestinal side effects. She also cannot have apple juice, which we discovered when she was a toddler, due to the same effects (apples are a natural source of sorbitol). Does your son drink a lot of flavored almond milks or soy milks (they often contain a lot of additives, sweeteners, thickeners, etc)? Does he not drink enough water? Does he eat a variety of healthy real foods, or does he exist on rainbow sprinkle pop-tarts and candy?

Rewards and punishments aren't really appropriate for a physical problem, except when that problem is completely under the child's control. Say your 7 year old burps a lot, and loudly. If it's accidental, after a meal, and he says "excuse me" and attempts to keep it quiet, that's a bodily function that is normal. But if that same kid gets a huge kick out of loudly burping in the most inappropriate places (church, when visiting grandma) just for attention, that's a different story, and some behavior changes should happen. So if your child isn't soiling his underwear on purpose, or to aggravate you, or to get out of a spelling test, then a reward won't work or be appropriate, any more than you could try to earn a reward for not having a gray hair. So I suggest you quietly try to evaluate what's going on in your child's life, and his diet, when these incidents happen. Look for a trigger or pattern.

When he soils, is it like loose stool? He may have upset tummy. You don't mention how often it is. Is it a full BM or does he just not have time to run to the toilet?

Have you changed his diet? Is he nervous (can be a sign of anxiety). Can be a food intolerance.

One of my kids has a problem with lactose that leaves him a bit queasy at times. What happens if he has milk (regular) is he can't necessarily control his bowels. He doesn't soil his pants, but he has to run to the washroom. This is just a side effect.

Some kids don't always recognize the signs they have to go when they get busy, and are rushed - I have a friend whose child is like this. My kids while playing at home (at that age), have had the odd experience where they had to run to the washroom.

I would definitely NOT make a big deal about it, or offer rewards. Soiling (like wetting) is not something he can control. This will only serve to shame him.

Just don't make a fuss - be as low key as possible, I would just handle it matter of factly, like it's just a bodily function, and make light of it.

*I think the using washroom regularly and not rushing, adding fiber, and just keeping a log (do not make a big deal) of when it happens and what he ate/if he was stressed) will help. Again, don't draw too much attention to it.

Good luck :)

Perhaps it's a problem that he doesn't have enough time to use the bathroom at school when he needs to use it.
Schools give a few bathroom breaks at certain times of the day but it's really hard if your child s bowels are not on the schools break schedule.
You certainly don't want kids wandering the halls between class and bathroom all the time - it gets disruptive and some kids miss a lot of classroom time.
But if he has a medical reason perhaps a note from his doctor to the school to allow him some extra bathroom breaks might give him the time he needs when he needs it.

Increasing fiber is fine - but with fiber you need to keep up water intake to keep the fiber moving along otherwise the fiber can contribute to constipation.
Consider Benefiber - it's unflavored - and you can add it to his drinks and soups and he'll never know it's there.

I'd be curious to know if the "months with no problems" were in the summertime, and now that school is back in session, the problem is back. I knew a guy that wouldn't have a BM anywhere but at home . . . even in college. He lived at home during college because of this issue and actually had to drive home between classes if he had to go.

It's not uncommon at this age to not want to do private business anywhere but at home. Holding it all day at school (especially if he didn't go in the morning) is definitely going to cause problems.

I'd consider giving him Miralax right before bed or first thing in the morning to kind of "force" him on a schedule where he can have a good BM before school starts. Most folks have a "morning constitutional" - his just needs to be before school each day. Start the Miralax on a weekend so you can kind of see how long it takes before it takes effect. Because Miralax isn't a true laxative, a person can take it long term with no issues (although a person should always check with their doctor first before doing so).

Good luck!

Maybe he is just not wiping enough.

Hi Kay,
I had this same issue with one of my kids and thought it would never end. I worked hard to spare the child’s dignity and we tried lots of things. The problem almost totally cleared up when puberty started, happening very seldom and was completely gone by high school. Looking back, this kid was very, very shy growing up and likely refused to go unless at home, causing constipation and the resulting soiling. I remember how frustrating and confusing it was, but it just went away basically on its own. This “child” is now fully grown, well-educated, happily married and very successful. Keep trying to encourage a healthy diet and healthy habits and of course, follow your doctor’s suggestions, but most of all, don’t worry. You’re doing all you can.

My 8 yr old had something similar going on and it ended up that he had a milk protein allergy. Once we cut out dairy, he hasn’t had any issues. It might be worth a try. Poor guy!

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My 8 yr old had something similar going on and it ended up that he had a milk protein allergy. Once we cut out dairy, he hasn’t had any issues. It might be worth a try. Poor guy!