My Son Is a 2.5 Year Old Bully, Help!

I wonder if he is having a hard time sharing you with other children, especially with a new baby on the way. Try giving him a job to do when your attention is going to be elsewhere. Like, if you are going to get snacks together, have him carry something for you, or sing a song with you if you are going to be in the bathroom to maintain a connection with him. In your mind, you are doing home day care so that you can be with him, but in his mind, he may have mixed feelings about having to share you. That doesn't mean the benefits don't outweigh the costs, it just means you might have to be more thoughtful about how you direct your attention.

depending on what rough play is.... I tend to lean on part of the issue being that. If a parent ex play bites like a dog or wrestels (sp?), i don't think at 2.5 they know the dif between that and biting or pushing a kid down. If they rough play w/sords or something even like empty paper towel roles... and bonk eachother on the head... he's not gonna know the dif between that and another object. The other question i have, is that you know if he's being mean or frustrated, or simply misunderstood playing so i'd want to know which it is. If he's doing it because he's frustrated than i'd consider time outs and redirection. just a thought

This will take some time but you have to start rewarding your son when he has appropriate behavior whenever and where ever possible. This can be done with stickers on a chart and perhaps when he reaches his goal then he can have roughousing time with Dad but until then no rough play. This will take some time and a lot of patience but it is basic behavior management. It doesn't appear the time outs are working so catch him when he's doing good and stick to it. It will take a good 2 weeks to even sink in to him but don't give up. Changing behaviors at any age is not easy but you are in for trouble once he gets into school and trys this.

My son was also a different child while I had home daycare going on as compared to one on one at home. Alot had to do with consistency on my part. When he knew that hitting or roughhousing was NOT an option and he did something it wouldn't even warrant an explanation he was picked up and placed in timeout - just like any other child would be placed there from the daycare if that was the case. What my husband and him do together is fine, he needed to learn that different situations call for different behavior. But, even now, if I have a lax day and don't stick to my guns he and I will be at a battle of wills for up to a few days.
And sure some of it may be acting out for your attention....well then give it to him, in the form of acknowledging his behavior with a timeout...and then acknowledge the good behavior too....but I'm sure you know all that already. Just hang in there....2.5year old boys are a force to be reckon with all in themselves. I hear that the fruits of our labor will come in another 18+ years or something like that =-)!
Good Luck.