Iam sure everyone out there has had this situation where their lil one doesn't want to stop playing long enough to go pee. Example: She will be playing out side and i can see her kinda squirming or I was making dinner one night and I opened the fridge to see what i was going to make that night she was standing right next to me and she must have got a cold chill and sat down on the floor in order to hold it she sat there for a min and then ran to the bath room. Or i will be going to the store and I will say do you have to go to the bathroom before we go and she will say no but the minute we get to the store she needs to go. I talked to the doc and he doesnt have any worries about it he just suggests that i keep reminding her every so often. I wasnt too worried until now that she will be going into 1st grade. In kindergarden they have restrooms in the class room so if she held it to the last minute no big deal. But now in first grade the bathrooms are a few doors down. I guess my question to you mommy's is has any of your children ever done this because its becoming a every day thing. Should I be worried?
Thank you guys for all your help I am definitly going to try some things you guys mentioned. I took her back to the doctor for a check up just to ease my worries and he basically made me feel real stupid like I was just over reacting. Which maybe a little true but I would think he would have had a little more to say. I just didn't want it to turn into something serious. I might be looking into a new pediatrician.lol
I feel your frustration. I'm going through this with my 4 year old girl. Apparently, she's just got better things to do than to take time out to use the bathroom. She often waits until the very last second, then does that hysterical dash to the toilet. She doesn't always make it. I wish I had something to offer. I'll be watching the responses to your post for some solution, and good luck!
i had one child out of my 3 the same. I made her sit and run the water to pee, then as soon as she starting squirming, i would ask her with humor, are you doing the potty dance, it finally became a family joke and it went away , i also explained that she needs to listen to her bladder, i drew a picture and explained why it was so important to empty it when the signal came or she could get and infection, that was it ,no future problems, i am an RN, so you know what i mean,
A.
My son is the same way! He is 5 1/2 yrs old & just started Kindergarten. He is always too excited playing to take a break & go to the bathroom. We always remind, it's ok to take a break he isn't going to miss out on anything by taking a quick break. My husband & I pretty much do the same thing as your response from Adrienne w/that part @ home. I didn't think about it w/school! I will have to address that w/him now. =)
When do go places where we know he is going to be busy playing & not think about taking a break to go to the bathroom. We remind him before we get out of the car that when Mommy or Daddy tell you it is time to go to the bathroom, you are to listen & do it right away w/out putting up a fight! Usually that works, sometimes we have to remind saying "do u remember what we said in the car?" & then he won't try to argue w/us about going. =)
I thought it was just our son but I guess we are not alone. All of our friend's kids don't do this so we were amazed how long he would hold it for. I don't know if boys can get UTIs but we tell him he will if he doesn't go to the bathroom & then he will have to go to the hospital. I don't if that is wrong to say to him but we want him to kind of be worried & think of trying not to get one (even if they really can't get one, which i am unsure about).
My kids aren't potty trained yet so I don't have this problem with them, but I thought a different perspective might be helpful. I very clearly remember doing this, I held it in until I was in the 5th or 6th grade, and yes I had accidents up until then. I believe it started around 5 or 6 years old. You may want to find out why she holds it, like any kid I didn't want to leave the excitement that was going on but the biggest reason I would do it was because I was embarrassed to go to the bathroom. I have no idea why, but for some reason I didn't want people to know I had to go so I would try to wait until no one was paying attention to sneak off to the bathroom, yes even at home. There were no big traumatic experiences that caused me to feel this way, I was just a quiet,shy, extremely sensitive and easily embarrassed little girl. I am surprised that your dr. wasn't more concerned about it, because it can be a pretty bad thing. If she's not bad about it then it's probably not a big deal, but I was constantly holding it for long amounts of time and I was hospitalized several times for serious urinary tract infections, and bladder infections. It also became a problem because after holding it for so long I couldn't recognize when I had to go until it was almost too late. I had to retrain myself to go to the bathroom. Thats why it went on for so long because I simply didn't know I had to go until I couldn't wait any longer. That may be why she says she doesn't have to go until you get to the store, I did the very same thing. I would suggest talking to her about it carefully, because she's probably very sensitive about the issue and then coming up with a plan together on how to help her. Does she need to try every hour and see if she can go, does she just need reminders to go or does she simply need to know that going to the bathroom is a normal thing, it's a private thing, but nothing to be embarrassed about. It will take time so be patient but you can fix it. Just figure out how bad the problem is, and why she does it so that you can help her through it. Let me know if you have any questions I'll be willing to answer any questions you have about my experience.
I thought mine was the only one!!! My 6yr old does that too or she will end up having an accident. I remind her to tell the truth as soon as it happens and to try to go a little bit sooner. I figured that it was her being a kid and sometimes she was just being stubborn and not wanting to stop playing. Thank you for letting me know that I'm not alone.
Wow - why don't I ever think to ask these type of questions, because I have the EXACT same problem and I can't even tell you how worried I am about kindergarten this year. I don't know if their classrooms will have bathrooms in them, but that would be helpful. I didn't realize this was such a common (somewhat) thing for kids this age, but my daughter does the EXACT same things....including the 'going to the store' thing and that one drives me the craziest. I have to be honest...I haven't been too sympathetic, but after reading some of your responses I realize I need to be more understanding. I have already had several talks with her about going during recess or breaks at school and stuff, but I am still so nervous. I really don't have any advice, but sometimes just knowing you aren't the only one helps! Thank you for posting this question and I will continue to look back at the responses. Good luck!
Hi,
You are definately NOT alone! My son was the same way! In fact, he had accidents twice in school! Once in kindergarten and once in first grade! That's when the "Unflexible Rules" started:
At Home:
1) You will go to the bathroom as soon as you wake up in the a.m.
2) Mom or Dad catches you doing pee-pee dance you go to bathroom. (this rule applies everywhere)!
3) You go before bedtime.
At School:
My son had very good and understanding teachers that we communicated with constantly. So, with his 1st grade teacher, we told her all our rules we were setting down for home and school so our son couldn't try to pull the wool over her eyes!
1) Every bathroom break your teacher offers you take! Even if you don't feel like you have to go.
2) After you eat lunch/ before you go to play @ recess you go to bathroom!
There are no exceptions! And yes, we've had crying fits over, "But I really don't have to go"! I'd say 8 out of 10 times....he went! I think its just a matter of making it a habit.
Kids are just too excited to be playing and they don't want to miss anything while they're gone!
I hope that helps! Its gonna be hard @ first but, just stick w/ it and be consistant!
Please, let me know how things go!
Holding urine in your bladder too long can lead to a voiding disorder(peeing disorder),then enlarged bladder which can cause VUR which can cause enlarged kidneys and kidney damage. My 6 year old daughter has all of the above mentioned. Explain to her holding her "pee pee" can make her a VERY sick little girl!!! We have been dealing with this issue for almost 2 years now. We have regular visits to a urologist, she has to under go a VCUG (this is where they put a cath up into the urethera and take live x-rays of your child urinating to check function) KUB x-rays and ultrasounds, daily medication to ward off UTI's and she just had surgery 4 months ago to fix her VUR (reflux of urine into the kidney). Every person is constantly making urine 24 hours a day. A healthy voiding schedual for any child is to void (urinate) every 2 hours. Once the bladder has gotten so full that they have an accident, it starts to push urine up into the kidneys causing this horrible cycle. I hope this info may help. I always worry for parents who have kids that with hold now that I know 1st hand how a seemingly hamless act of holing in their pee can actually be for them. Good luck. T.
I have found some children are so engrossed it what is going on around them and not wanting to miss out- miss the toilet. I suggest that you take the next step not just asking but taking her to the toilet sit her down to avoid the 'accident'.
maybe stay there so that she knows she is not missing out. Although bladders mature at different rates, we often think that by two a child is ready for potty training- that is often not the case. But as far as school goes. Pack a bag of extra clothes just in case and leave them with the teacher, so she wont feel ashamed if she doesn't make it. At the same time, children at her age don't want to be seen as babies so she may surprise you. It sounds like she is aware at school how far the toilet is away from her. I also wonder what the response to her accidents are. Do you find yourself stopping everything to help clean up? I'm not saying that you should do nothing but if it is becoming a big deal- I would change the reaction that you are having, in case it is becoming a control issue. If all else fails I would have her checked for a low grade UTI just in case and if it still becomes a problem in the end I understand they have those new underwear for children who have under developed bladders that can go pretty much unnoticed. The best thing I can say is that she will grow out of it. I don't know to many ten year old who wet themselves. Although my daughter still, when laughing, will need a change of clothes at 12 years every now and then. I have given her little pantie liners. that helped her.
