In Need of Hearing from like Mamas with Early Menopause.

Updated on September 30, 2011
L.B. asks from Sacramento, CA
10 answers

I just found out today that I am in menopause at age 42. I have a one year old boy that was conceived very easily however I had hot flashes and irregular periods prior to him coming along. I realize even more now how blessed we truly are to have him in our lives. We were on the fence about a second baby, recently started trying, but I was having crazy awful hot flashes and irregular periods. Then, my periods stopped in July. I had a bunch of blood work done and was happy to hear that I am healthy in every other way. So I'm grieving the loss of my childbearing years. It happened so quickly and according to my doctor I am very young to be going through this so early. I'm going on birth control pills-haha- to get the estrogen I need to ward off other diseases and to help with libido, moodiness, etc. I just wanted to try to connect with other mom's who may be experiencing or have experienced similar emotions. I'm sad to not have another baby, relieved to not have another baby, sad it's not a possibility, happy that we have a baby, relieved it's nothing serious...so many emotions. Just wanted to reach out since this has proved to be a helpful venue for me. Thanks in advance for reading my post.

1 mom found this helpful

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

More Answers

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Until you've gone a whole year without a period it's peri-menopause.
It's possible to get pregnant, but a lot less probable due to the age of your eggs.
I wish my periods would quit already.
The longest I've gone between so far is 51 days, but once in awhile I'll have one in 14 days.
I've been 7 years with the hot flashes and I've been told it could go on for several more years (I turn 50 in Dec).
Estroven seems to keep the hot flashes / night sweats to a manageable level but it doesn't work for everyone.

2 moms found this helpful

R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

I went through instant menopause due to needing an emergency hysterectomy, I'm glad you don't need to go that route. Sadness was a major emotion, I admit, but having children softened the shock.

But I do want to tell you, I have a friend who had all your signs, irregular periods, then they stopped, hot flashes, menopause confirmed by her doctor...so she didn't think she could get pregnant. She was sad but content, she had a 19 year old son. Lo and behold she conceived, and at 49 became a new mom. So while it shouldn't have happened, it did. She calls her daughter her "change of life" child.

2 moms found this helpful

G.T.

answers from Redding on

You are young for menopause, I'm sure you are in perimenopause and things will be weird for quite a few years before it's all said and done. Your emotions will be weird because your hormones are all whack. It's a fun ride, haha.
Does early menopause run in your family? You might want to get a second opinion just in case. Mine started at 48 and my doc said that was young and due to the fact that I smoke. I've never done any hormone therapy, just herbals like black cohosh.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.H.

answers from St. Louis on

welcome to the Roller Coaster....it's one heck of a ride! I'm 49, still considered perimenopause because I still have periods. This has been going on for 5+ years now.... The only time I don't have a period is when my thyroid is out of whack & my med needs to be increased.

Sooo, in my case, I still experience PMS + menopause symptoms. Yeehah!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.B.

answers from Austin on

Hi,
I had a blood test @ 44 that showed I was producing no more eggs, so that is how doc determined I had experienced menopause (which was explained to me as an event). I believe it was the FSH test -- they could tell I was not going to produce any more eggs (just googled "fsh" & found info on labtestsonline).

At 43, my husband & I were on the fence, what to do. I had my 3rd and final miscarriage that year. We do have one child. It was kind of like a grieving process. We were told we could try hormones & see if I could carry to term once more. We decided against it & I had a tubal ligation. Earlier, husband's doc told him not to get vasectomy b/c I was no doubt going to hit menopause soon. How did HE know? But he was right! Wish I hadn't had the tubal, but you can't see into future.

Blessings to you...I know, it's a weird feeling, relief mixed in....

D.K.

answers from Sioux City on

I'm there. I'm 43 and haven't had a period for over a year. I have several six children. To have passed away and our youngest is 2 and my oldest is 15. I would always love more children because I truly believe they are blessings but this 2 year old can really wear me out. I was totally not prepared to think that I will never feel another child growing in me. It's almost like I feel I got old over night.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.R.

answers from Glens Falls on

I'm 58 and wanted to tell you that menopause can take a decade to go through. Everyone experiences menopause differently. If you are looking at an elevated FSH level, know that you can still conceive, assuming you decide you want to, and a fertility specialist can evaluate your eggs which is a much better indicator of your ability to conceive at this point. I have a girlfriend who conceived for the first time at age 50 with an elevated FSH.

My experience with menopause was 8 years of worsened PMS, breakthrough bleeding, and hot flashes, however the hot flashes I had in my forties were truly nothing, nothing at all, compared to the final year of menopause when they became so bad, so frequent, chills after, sweater on and off 300 times a day, vasa vagal syndrome during my periods- I felt like I had the flu for a year. I slept maybe 5 hrs a might. I would paint rooms in the middle of the night. (I did get a lot done!)Then my periods ceased completely. I nevered missed any periods. They just stopped like somebody shut off a faucet when I was 51. My mother's experience (and that's supposed to be a big indicator for us) was entirely different. She missed periods for one or two or three months for five years. She did, however, actually stop at age 51, just like me. So everybody's experience is different and this does not necessarily mean the end of child bearing for you. Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.C.

answers from Fresno on

I'm sorry you're having to grieve the loss of your child bearing years. I went through the same thing when I found out I couldn't carry a pregnancy at all without significant risk to the baby. After working through the emotions, I realized I just wanted to be a mom and didn't care how that happened. We looked at adoption and eventually chose surrogacy.

I just wanted to share my story that if you truly want more kids, there are other options if you are open to them.

On the menopause front, I've been in peri-menopause for a few years and yes, it's definitely not fun. Some of my symptoms really eased up with I started taking One A Day Menopause formula, though I really don't know what the effects are for someone in full menopause.

Anyway, you have my support and hope that things get better for you on both issues.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.R.

answers from San Francisco on

Maca root is really good for the symptoms. A friend of mine was having horrible hot flashes and after 3 tsp of Maca root powder a day for a month she is completely comfortable now. My mom took a natural herbal supplement to help her symptoms and she actually started her period again! If you want information on that let me know and I will ask her what it was. I don't think your conceiving times are over. I think there are many natural options.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.M.

answers from San Francisco on

i'm 39 and was just told i'm in the early phases of menopause. sort of caught of guard, but what can you do? i try to look at the bright side... my periods will stop soon.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions