In Desperate Need of Advice... - New Cumberland,PA

My children go to a private home for day care and there is no way I would not pay her on time or give her info about my children when there was a problem. I'm sure you aren't charging any where near what it will cost for a day care center and that may be part of the problem for her, she probably realizes how much more it's going to cost. But also no one wants to feel like their children are being rejected and that could be how she is feeling. I completely agree that you gave her plenty of time to find a new day care.

I can also understand how you want to try and clear the air especially since she is a friend and neighbor. I would call and leave a message for her, let her know that you would like to spend some time with her to go over any questions she has and to clear the air.

Sometimes it's hard to be friends and have a business situation at the same time, especially when it deals with children...maybe let her know you just want to go back to being friends because the other situation just wasn't working for everyone. Let her know you still care about her and her children but that keeping it on a friend level instead of a job level will allow everyone to be on the same playing field all the time.

sounds as if you are better off!What has she done for you lately!It is ok to quit!You gave her notice!You need not explain!

ps as for not charging her i dont know why anyone would think you shouldnt get paid for your job..as a friend i wouldnt have anyone babysit for me to work unless i paid ..

sounds like she is taking advantage of you, and trying to make you feel guilty. If she won't talk to you, maybe you could drop her a note explaining how you feel.

This is such a sticky situation. It is a great thing to do for others but after a while the parents can tend to see you as a friend instead of a service provider. They begin to take advantage of you and just think you will accept it. And I know I do. I can tell you that I get so frustrated about the way I am treated by one parent in particular but I feel like she has no other option. And she does pay so there's that too. This parent is always late and we feed her child dinner for no extra charge. I mean we are going to eat dinner before 7:00 what are we supposed to do make her kid watch us have dinner?

I guess I have no advice to offer but to let you know that there are many more of us out there like you. I think we should all get a group together and support each other online.

Good luck and please know that this will pass and things will be just fine, you may even feel some relief to have her out of your life in the long run.

c.

Hi C.,

Write down everything you want to say to your friend in this format.

"When you....................(describe all the behaviors that she has done that have affected you.)

(then say to her) I feel.................(express all your
feelings that you have experienced from her behaviors.)

(then say to her) In the future................(express what you want her to do in reference to what you need from her.)

Read it to her so you won't forget what you want to say.

Hope this helps. Good luck. D.

C., if you are friends with her I would call her. I agree that maybe she is feeling that her children are being rejected, which would be tough to deal with. I'm hoping that this isn't this first she's hearing about the issues you have with her. I hope she's been told about this before and has been given 'warnings' about the problems you're having....Good luck with whatever you decide to do. It's very tough to do business with friends.

Sounds like your friend was takinga dvantage of you. When you help someone out and have to stop you find out if they are really your friends or not. Also I am suprised you charged your fiend. Was it steady childcare like all day all week? In that case I would ask for a little bit of money. I have a good friend whom we help eachother out with childcare and I wouldn't charge ehr unless it was steady care like I asked you about and at that I wouldn't ask for much. A true friendship is when you help eachother but from what you describe it sounds like you was taken avantage of.

I think you should call her, if she wont asnwer you then you need to move on.