I can understand the stress you must be experiencing due to frustration, misinformation, hormones, etc. To be honest, the biggest thing that caught my attention was that your husband won't let you consider home birth. My son was at born at 25 months ago in a state where midwives weren't legal, so I definitely understand the insurance aspect. However, with the recent moves by hospitals to not allow VBACs, even though they're usually safe, I would do some research on your own about homebirth if it's something that YOU would consider. There are MANY midwives in the Bay Area, and you can start with bayareahomebirth.org.
Both my sisters were born at home, and I knew that's what I wanted. My husband didn't want a homebirth, wouldn't even read the articles or information I had found about it, but it basically came down to what *I* as the pregnant, then laboring mother really wanted and was comfortable with. I know homebirth is not for every woman, and I know a lot of women have very rewarding births in hospitals. However, you're facing an hour drive in labor, and you wouldn't have to go through the urgency if you were able to relax and stay home. I didn't have the history you do, but it wouldn't hurt to just talk with a few of the midwives from the website. They also might have a lot of information regarding insurance, cost, etc.
In a realistic financial sense, homebrith is MUCH cheaper than a hospital even WITH insurance. I can't imagine how much a hospital birth would cost with no coverage!!!
Whatever decision you make, make sure YOU are comfortable with it!! I wish you the best, and congratulations on baby #2!!!!!!