Ideas Other than Card and Flowers

Updated on September 30, 2011
N.P. asks from Nashville, TN
14 answers

My very best friend's grandmother passed away today after many difficult years. I would like to do/send something to her mother/family other than just the normal condolence card/flowers. I live several states away so bringing food or whatnot would not be possible. I was thinking maybe having a tree planted in her name or something like that. Do you have any ideas or is there something someone did for you that you really appreciated? Thanks so much ladies!

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T.M.

answers from Charlotte on

Another idea, Give a gift to hospice in her area or an organization like the American Heart Association, Red Cross, or an organization her grandmother was involved in, sometimes these are listed in the obituary. Also a gift to a school,university or library in her grandmothers name.

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T.C.

answers from Knoxville on

My brother was killed in an auto accident last year and a dear sweet friend brought me a windchime. Another of my friends brought me glass flowers and I have both of these still up in my house. Everytime I hear the windchime, I'm reminded of my brother. I have a 2 year old and a 10 year old and when they hear it they also think of their Uncle. Those are gifts that I will have with me that won't perish and I treasure them.

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A.A.

answers from Columbus on

My family has always been most touched by a handwritten card, with a story or memory of the loved one.

If the family is religous, another idea (dont' mean to be pushy here) is having a mass said for the grandma at their local church. You can just ring up and usually make a small donation and they will have a mass in memory of the deceased.

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P.S.

answers from Houston on

How about a pendant w/the grandmother's birthstone on it? Necklace, tennis bracelet, or ring would be nice.

You know what would really mean alot? Remember the anniversary of her grandmother's death next year by sending a card or calling her up on that particular day.

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T.K.

answers from Fayetteville on

My Dad passed away within the past year - and we loved receiving the cards from friends and family. Many of them had nice sentiments about Dad, some of them were just encouragement to us (some of my friends had never met my Dad as they were from other areas of the country that we had lived in thanks to military service).
We received some plants and flower arrangements and they were nice. One of the nicest things I received personally was a new tea cup from one of my friends - she and I were always having coffee or tea together when we were neighbors.

As a family we had decided on a couple of local charitable agencies to ask people to send donations to and many people did donate to those, we also received donation cards from other agencies that we had not identified. We were equally happy to see that people were selecting other organizations to support in my Dad's honor.

I think anything you send will be well received and appreciated because you are thinking of your friend and her family in a very difficult time.

T.

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K.U.

answers from Detroit on

I second the suggestion of something from Harry and David, or maybe an Edible Arrangement (fresh fruit "bouquet") if there is a store near her that will deliver.

Along the lines of planting a tree, the following link can help you make a donation to the U.S. Forest Service that will plant new trees in areas that need them: http://www.nationalforests.org/conserve/treeplanting

I am also a fan of making a donation to charity in her name, if she had a particular charity that she supported. Personally I am a big fan of Heifer International: https://secure1.heifer.org/gift-catalog?msource=kwga5&amp...

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M.L.

answers from Colorado Springs on

This sounds pretty old-fashioned, but did your friend's grandmother have a favorite charity or cause? A contribution could be a good way of remembering her memory. Some of my deceased relatives and friends had organizations they long supported. Others had interests: for instance, I had a relative who always cared about stray animals - took in practically anything that was on four feet, and found either the owners or new homes. When he died we sent a donation in his name to the animal shelter in his town. His family loved it.

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R.K.

answers from Boston on

Hi,
How thoughtful of you. We often send a beautiful memory lamp these days, as the lamp is permanent, but if the family moves, it can be brought with them. I purchase mine at: www.reflectionsofmarlborough.com. The lamps can be shipped and the staff will create a very personal poem with your help.
I'm sure whatever you do, your friend will appreciate your thoughtfulness.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Harry & David,
http://www.harryanddavid.com/gifts/store/home___

They have great 'condolence baskets.'
Just type in condolence or sympathy baskets, in the search box.

Harry & David, has great baskets. My late Dad used them all the time, sending them to many people. And they always loved it.

A tree is a nice idea.

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M.T.

answers from Nashville on

A phone call and/or a personal letter or note conveying your condolences. Also, you can order food and have it delivered. Honey Baked Ham is good for that. I know when you have a loved one pass, food is sometimes the last thing on your mind to eat or cook, so sending it from afar is also a good gesture.

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K.J.

answers from Chicago on

I second the notion to order foor to have delivered, but I also love the idea of planting a tree. Is there a special park that she loved that you could contact? Or a school, church, hospital, nursing home, etc?

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R.N.

answers from Sioux City on

I have given the Willow Tree "Remember" figurine to several friends who have lost loved ones and it has been well-received.

Other ideas I've done are to purchase gift cards for local restaurants in their area so they can go get food if they want or have it deliverd.

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C.K.

answers from Knoxville on

Hi N.,
I think the tree idea is really good. Another idea (might be too expensive though) is giving a park bench - for their home, or for where the grandmother is buried (if she is) so they have a place to sit when they go visit, or for a local park. Have some sort of brass plate engraved for the bench. My in-laws did this for my FIL's dad so that his mom would have a place to sit when she went to the cemetary (before she passed away).
Cyndi

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M.M.

answers from Fresno on

That's very sad but maybe you could send them a cross for their home and let them know that she's always with them. It's always hard in those situations. Good luck!

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