How to Look Good When Overweight

I hear what you're saying.
I found myself in the same position. I started paying attention to what I was eating, walking a lot (any chance I got. Morning, evening etc.), ate better, ate 3 sensible low fat meals w/3 healthy proportioned snacks in between & have finally found a few places that had clothes I felt fit my age & body:
-Macy's
-Old Navy & sometimes The Gap
-Target for a few things (undergarments, bathing suits, shorts).

I found tee shirts made me look sloppy so I tried to go a style up like a blouse but not one that made me look too much older than my true age.

Capri jeans can be really cute.

I found doing my makeup & hair helped my over all look plus accessorizing with some cute jewelry.

Smile. I think people always look more attractive when they present with strength and confidence.

Best,
F. B.

It's good you want to feel better and get some flattering clothes. Most places do have 12 or XL so you should be able to find stuff if you keep looking. Try on tons of things that you would never usually try, you may stumble upon something that works. You're right, it's no fun to have all the weight in your middle, and before I lost weight after a couple of my pregnancies I finally hit that "Not flattering no matter what" threshold where I had too many chins and too much belly and it sucked. I did lose the weight and work hard to keep it off, but I do get what you are saying about feeling bad and not knowing what to wear. So DO keep trying until you find a couple of outfits you can B. yourself in. But I also want to share a good way to eat better when you're feeling so self-abusive. Try to think of healthy eating habits as "nurturing yourself" like a special treat. Hydrate yourself with water all day because it's a "fancy treat", take your vitamins and eat healthy fresh food like it's a "spa goodie", go to bed early with a book after herbal tea for beauty sleep because you're "pampering yourself". Unconsciously we seek comfort by excessive and bad eating, but with constant deliberate mind control you CAN really start to love eating better and then when you see the benefits and love yourself even more, the cycle starts to go a positive way. You didn't say why you can't exercise, but "treat yourself" to a healthy diet and you will lose lots of extra weight quickly. So treat yourself to some new clothes and fabulous eating habits (including enough sleep and water!), and before long, you'll be a few sizes smaller. It does work.

You and I are abut the same size, and I just lost 20 lbs. There are some key elements I always look for in clothing:
1. low cut tops - my shape likes a v-neck as opposed to a scoop neck, turtlenecks or anything right up to the throat makes your chest look smaller and the rest of you look bigger
2. make sure your tops are long enough, if they are too short (and many in your size will be because of your height) it makes you look bigger through the waist, Old Navy's long XL size is just right for me in t-shirts
3. shirts that are cinched in at the waist look better than ones that are cut straight
4. pants that fit well and are cut mid waist are better than trying to pretend you are a size 10
5. tank tops with shelf bras are your friend
6. layers should be done with something tight underneath and something looser fitting over top, not two tight shirts together
7. Don't forget to stand up straight! Those of us who are tall tend to slouch, especially when we are around other women. Don't do that, standing tall will take inches off your waist line.
8. Get a girdle or some spanx, ain't no shame in needing those with dress pants or a dress.

sistah! i'm a couple of inches shorter and a few pounds heavier than you, and can totally relate. i was an 7 in high school, and about a 9/10 when i started having kids. but i got enormous during my pregnancies, and despite a brief period of getting down to a 13 after my first baby, i've never lost it. i was 20 for a while, but have been 14/16 for the last decade or more. my body has definitely settled into a rut at this size.
i ran a marathon a couple of months ago. i'm a fit fat girl. but hoo baby! how happy i'd be if i could shed 20lbs!
i really admire women who can wear something snug and flaunt their lovely curves. it doesn't work on me, because my curves aren't lovely (other than my bazoombas, which are still pretty spectacular at age 55.) and i hate muumuus. so i've got a pretty narrow margin of clothing that's voluminous enough not to cling, but not so billowy that i'm walking inside a tent.
you're smaller than i, but i'm surprised you haven't found anything at lane bryant. look again, i think you'll find they do have clothes to fit you. jc penneys isn't consistent, but often has really nice stuff. lord and taylor's is high end, but their sales are terrific. just go in and swarm right for the sales racks. i love target, but they often have nothing in my size that looks right, although i get lucky occasionally. and for fancy occasions, dress barn is my go-to, despite its depressingly prosaic name.
happy shopping!
:) khairete
S.

Definitely try Lane Bryant, they specifically carry clothes that are cut to accommodate larger women, as opposed to simply making clothes designed for a size 2 in a larger size.

Regarding the fit, & how to look good:

You don't want the clothing to be so tight that your "bulges" show in detail, although there will be areas where you are wider that you need to work with. You also don't want to go to the other side of the coin and wear clothing that is so loose & skimming that your body shape is lost, stay away from "boxy" clothing.

Find pieces that are cut with a natural shape to accent your shape, & keep you looking like a woman. Make sure it works for YOU, because everyone gains weight in different ways, and so not all clothes work with all people. For example, I cannot wear an empire waisted shirt or dress, because my weight in my abdomen makes me look about 7 mos pregnant. But they look great on the plus-size models (of course) & my friend can wear them & look cute.

Good luck! T.

For a start, make sure your grooming is up to scratch. Hair, eyebrows, nails, makeup - even if it's just putting some firming cream on your face to brighten up. Bronzing powder can help to define the face and create shadowing to appear slimmer.

As far as clothes are concerned, just keep trying them on. When you find some that fit and look good, buy them. You're tall enough to easily carry that weight and look elegant.

I sometimes get a case of what my mother call 'the fat and uglies'. It's when we are feeling blue about our appearance. Normally, I get distracted in a couple of days by life, and things get better!

At 5'8" it is still somewhat easy to look polished/put together at 172.

I used to think it was impossible to weigh more than 165 (i'm 5'8) until I had kids. My metabolism slowed and I actually hit 200, so getting to 172 made me think I was 'normal'

I carry most of my weight in my legs/thighs/butt so my face looks thin. This help with photos, but not much else.

You are not quite plus size, so you can shop most places. I like wearing some plain shirts and adding a nice necklace that makes a statement. This allows me to not commit too much to the clothes and know I can keep the necklace once I lose more weight. I did get pants that were too large and i look super sloppy. I look better when they are a bit tight, yet a muffin top forms.

edit:
I am not sure what size lane Bryant starts, yet Macy's woman's size 14W is so much larger than Macy's size 14. The W must add inches to the middle. I think 14W is the smallest they carry and I do not think it would fit someone 5'8" and 172. Also, plus size store are often more expensive than regular stores. FYI if it makes you feel better you are close to the healthy weight range according to the BMI. http://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html

Lane Bryant carries size 12.

There are articles and books that explain how to dress to flatter any size and figure type. Ask a librarian for help finding one. Google variations of fashion and size. One of my college classes had a unit that answered this question so I know the information is out there.

Some ideas are to wear the same color top and bottom. Stay away from small and really large prints. Wear clothes that are neither too snug or too lose. Use color and shape to play up your better features. Draw attention to your face. Wear a print on top and darker but ccoordinating color on bottom. For you stay with simple bottoms with less fabric. No gathered skirts or baggy pants. That sort of idea.

I suggest that the focus in fashion is less on what flatters and more on following fashion. I find a more classic look easier but not necessary. You could go to a high end store that have personal shoppers on staff and ask for help. Or even go to a store and try on an assortment of styles. Take a friend who has a good eye and who will be honest with you. Finding the right look takes experimenting.

If you have the time and know of someone who sews, you might get some items made to fit you as you are currently. Sometimes it is hard to buy things that fit well without alterations.

As we get older our style of clothing changes and the fashion industry does not take that into consideration. Try to get basics that you can dress up or down that really fit well and can be adjusted up or down a size. I know easier said than done in this modern age.

Talk to the women in the department and have them give you some suggestions and try on things that you might not think would be you. Sometimes they are just what you need to cover your body without being too large and blousy or too tight.

Try the higher end stores and then work your way down to the lower end for accessories.

the other S.

I wear a 3x. I try to make an effort when I go out, nicer clothes, basic make up and lip gloss, at least. Even if you are just wearing sweats and a t shirt, brush your hair, put on some gloss and perfume. Just because you are bigger doesn't mean you have to look like a slob. I'm not fashionable by any means, I don't care to be and live pretty simply. But maybe because I am bigger I don't want to look like the stereo type overweight person who doesn't make an effort. JMO. Good luck.

Lane Bryant
http://www.roamans.com/
http://www.womanwithin.com/
http://www.onestopplus.com/

The 'wear tight clothes that conform to their rolls' look is nobody s friend.
'Muffin top' (fat bulging out over the top of too tight pants) and 'Camel toe' (too short rise, too tight in the crotch area) just look horrible.
Stay away from anything that bares your middle (I'd so sick of seeing belly buttons and butt cracks).
Some of these people seriously NEED to re-discover muumuus!

Tunic tops are great!

I think one thing is to pay attention to the cut of clothes. Size is irrelevant if the cut doesn't flatter your body shape. A size 4 can wear the same as a size 12, if the proportions are the same.

So, maybe go to somewhere that has a personal shopper or stylist (check department stores) to get a feel for that. Or, honestly, watch some episodes of What Not To Wear.
In fact, start with this book, which is a basic, flip to the page that matches your body kind of guide: http://www.amazon.com/What-Not-Wear-Trinny-Woodall/dp/157...) This book was my bible when I was heavier.

It will give you ideas of what kinds of clothes flatter your shape (like, big arms = no cap sleeves and no thick sweaters...)

I'm a thrift-store shopper, and there is actually some very nice clothing in those stores. (Well, there is in the ones where I live.) You have to shop a little differently than you do in a "regular" store, because you find your best things at another season than the one you're in, but it's worthwhile. I've seen Lane Bryant things that are lovely. You would have to ask which aisles you should shop in, though, because, in the thrift stores I patronize, size twelve isn't considered plus-size - it's considered ladies' large.

I seem to be built like a Christmas tree - long head, narrow shoulders, non-narrow hips. So I've found that you take the shape you're blessed with and deal with it. When you can find clothes that can fit you well - not too tight, not too baggy - you'll start to feel better.

I hope that one day you'll be able to talk to a nutritionist and get out of the stress eating before it grabs you and won't let go. This isn't a poke at you - it's a poke at ME to get back to the eating habits I know are right! It's been a stressful time for me lately, too.

I would totally check out Gwynnie Bee. They're online. Makes me wish I could be a size 10 or higher just to wear some of their cute clothes....

I so hear what you're saying.

I rediscovered Dress Barn a few months ago. The clothes are more tailored and flatter all types of figures. They have pants with control panels in them too!

I recommend trying on a lot of clothes - especially clothes that you wouldn't normally wear. I typically do not like to wear patterns, but I found a patterned pair of pants (black with gold in them) that I pair with a plain black blouse (that has nice draping in the front). I always get compliments when I wear it.

You can look good at any size. It just takes a little searching. Good luck!

hello, Old Navy has a variety of sizes as does Target and Torrid. I am 5'3 and size 12 and short-waisted.. I found that in order to find the right jeans, I need to try and a bunch..this could mean 10 to 20 pairs.. as was the case when I went to Target yesterday.. alas, I found two pair that fit right... I would recommend doing the same thing.. try ALL different styles and sizes.. also, try on a bunch of shirts... you can dress pants up with a blazer that hits you below the waist or longer (since u r 5'8) I USED to like the skinny style jeans, but then one day looked in the mirror and thought, you know.. these jeans that cling to my calves don't look good on me.. so I bought jeans that don't cling.. and I feel better in..also, I used to live in the black tee (until someone said jokingly) are you a jet?? (ref to westside story) ... anyway, I realized that colors make a difference too... what colors do you feel good in? I don't like bright colors, never have.. but black is now too harsh for my skin tone... but navy and autumn shades work..
so when you try and clothes, take into the color and texture of clothing.. for me, I can't sand synthetic material... It makes my skin crawl... therefore, when I try on clothes, I no longer look for something that fits via my size, but I take into the whole scheme.... like how does it feel on my skin... can I sit down comfortably in a chair with certain pants on. (which leads me to..) once you try and pants/skirt.. sit down in the dressing room to get a sense of how the clothing feels... sometimes things feel good when standing up, but once you sit down, the clothing clings..
anyway, these are all the things when shopping.. again, try the places listed above.. Target was having a sale on some of their jeans.. so check those out...Also, with every manufacturer, you might be a 12 in one brand but a larger or smaller in another.. so don't count the size too much... and let it get you down... go shopping when you feel fresh and in a good mood... that works best for me..

good luck

Foundation is so key to not looking "sloppy". Wear support underwear to give structure to your natural figure. Then, wear clothes that are made well and that fit well. There might be a tendency to wear sizes that fit too big, because you just want to cover it all up, but that works against you. Try on multiple sizes and find THE RIGHT FIT for that article of clothing, and don't settle for a sub-par fit. Accept that some items just will not fit you well, and leave them where you find them. You'll look better and feel better, and that will lead to you looking even better.

Because of my body type, I could always wear sizes 4-12, depending on cuts. I gained weight and started buying 16s and multiple Xs. Once I started losing a little weight, I realized that I was selling myself short with the larger sizes. I was buying for my boobs and trying to hide. I was in fear of regaining or not losing more weight, and then I realized that my clothes were too big. I look and feel so much better now. Today, I am sitting here in a 12P dress that looks really great; people have no idea that I weigh as much as I do, because of the way that my clothes fit me. I wear 3/4 sleeves instead of short sleeves--big difference.

If you have a small frame, larger Petite sizes could be for you. It sounds like an oxymoron, I know, but it could make a difference. Also, I wear varied T-shirt styles (dressed up and down) and belted shirt dresses because buying for the largest body parts can make me look waistless. I hate walking around looking like a sack of potatoes. And when I look and feel better, I tend not to sit on my butt all day.

Go to a store where someone will help to fit/style you. You might be surprised at what you walk out with. Nordstrom is good for that. Nordstrom even has a feature online that you can use to find the right style and size clothing. It's not perfect, but it is really good, at least for me.

Good luck.

I feel your pain. I am also at my heaviest and feeling very frumpy. I carry it mainly in my stomach, and it really shows in my face. I feel I can no longer even suck in my stomach and am surprised strangers haven't asked if I'm pregnant with my fourth child! I agree that Anthropologie is for a certain body type (and age, too, I believe), but I did find this summer that many of their tops are longer in the back, which offers a flattering option with leggings. Try maxi dresses and skip low-rise bottoms. Also try a shirt dress with a drawstring so that you can create a waist that isn't too constricting. It beats a tunic that looks like a tent. Go for bottoms that hit at the "natural" waist without looking like bad mom jeans. I buy Old Navy jeans in the Sweetheart style. I think Old Navy also carries plus sizes online, so you could have more luck with something cut to be more flattering. You can try something more fitted in the right print, like some floral prints, that don't draw attention to every lump or roll compared to a solid. Good luck!

Try JC Penney, Macy's, Carson Pirie Scott, Lord & Taylor-seriously, they have some really cute clothes for your size.

first off get a measuring tape and figure out exactly what your measurments are. Size 12 in a store like jc penney and macy's might be different than a size 12 in target or kmart. I found that when I am feeling down about myself its because something that I love is just not fitting right anymore. So when you shop take a couple things in 2 different sizes and try them on. You might find that jeans with a little stretch to them are better than jeans that are 100% cotton. I shop at lane bryant, dress barn and catherines. catherines will have nothing for you at a size 12 but dress barn goes from about a size 2 to a size 24 womens. you will find many beautiful things there. as another poster said a v neck works better than a round or square cut neck to draw attention up to your face instead of down to your hips. big baggy tops don't disguise hips they emphasize them so go with tshirts / tops that while not skin tight are not circus tent type. Just my size is online you can look at there catalogue right at home and all sizes are on there. my mom orders from blair, romans, the woman within and a ton of online sites. Good luck.

do yourself a favor go to thrift stores or goodwill-huge variety u can get alot more for your money-i went from a size 4 to 22 to 16 to 12 after being put on steroids-i refuse to spend 75.00 on a pair of new pants etc..it took me a long time to get use to being overweight-but im 54 now-my attitude is love me for me-im not going to go on a diet,starve myself,deny myself etc so i can get back my pretty lil figure..blek forget it-if im hungry for something im gonna eat it..so thats what i suggest you do.