I family friend's daughter is having a shower in another town and I have been invited. I can't go, but I do want to send a nice gift. How much do you spend on something like that?
Also, I will be attending the wedding in the summer. We have to travel quite a distance and will spend a good amount to get there. I do want to give a nice gift as I have known this child since birth. How much do you spend on a wedding gift?
You All are great! You helped tremendously. I understand that it depends on what you can afford, the closeness of the family, areas of the country you live, social morès for the area, etc... and your answers really helped me pin point what I think is best for us. Also, fyi, I read online that you decide how much you want to spend totally. About 75% of that should go to the wedding. The rest to the shower. 60% to the wedding if you also buy an engagement gift. This article also suggested you spend a little less if you have the expense of traveling to the wedding. Thank ya'll so much! This is why I love Mamapedia!
I think a $25 gift, in this case, would be perfect! And, I disagree with the person who put you don't have to send a gift if you are not attending. You need to send a gift--you were invited. That's just my opinion!
Shower - $50-$75 (more if it is a really close friend)
Wedding - $100-$200
But, that is just US. It totally depends on what YOU can afford. If you want to spend what I suggested above, I think you are in a great range. Not too little (yes, I think $20 on a shower gift is far too little, that is like a package of diapers and a bib!), and not too much. Just budget for it. Cut out a few things here and there just for that month and you can get a nice gift.
Um, I want Chicago mama as my friend!
About $35 these days.
Since you are not attending the shower, but will be attending the wedding, just check out her register and buy one nice gift either to be sent to her home (parents home), or placed on the gift table at the wedding.
How much to spend? check out her wish list and buy what you can ACTUALLY afford. It doesn't matter how long you have known someone, if you can't afford it, buy something you CAN afford. The card you write should say much more then the cost of gift you send.
It really depends on your own budget. Last year we went to a wedding shower for a close friends daughter and I bought them 2 sets of their china. now that is a huge thing for us $200. For the wedding we gave the same amount only cash. Another friend who is a friend but not nearly as close we gave $100 at the wedding and spent about $40 at the shower. My own son is getting married next month and I have spent nearly $500 just on shower gifts alone. but it is really only what you can afford. for a shower out of town I would send a gift card for whereever they are registered.
I spend about $25-30 on a shower gift, and maybe up to $50 if it is one of my closest friends.
Shower gift around $100 and wedding gift $200.
up to $25 ish. The last shower I went to was for my cousin. I bought her a trifle bowl and etched her new last initial "a" in a really fancy font on it. We are huge "Friends" fans so in the bowl I put a box of yellow cake mix (for the lady fingers), a jar of jam, a box of jello pudding (for the custard), a can of peas, and a can of all beef chili. Its from a thanksgiving episode where rachel made a traditional english trifle that has all these layer: "first there is a layer of lady fingers, then a layer of jam, followed by a layer of custard, which I made from scratch, then beef sauteed with peas and onions..." It all had to be shelf stable hence the can of all beef chili for the beef. I also added a few kitchen towels and serving utensils. I had to fly to her wedding and rent a car and hotel room so I did not bring an additional gift to the wedding.
For another cousin-in-law (cousin was the groom) I was not able to go to her shower and it was more a personal shower. I had bought a coach purse online and was $8 from free shipping and my shipping was $15 so I thought I would see if there was anything I could use as a gift. there was a small little zip purse for $12 that retailed for $68 so I thought done! It could hold her essentials for her big day. This wedding was local so I bought a pyrex dish and etched their last name on it in a cute font and put in kitchen towels, serving utensils lasanga noodles, speghetti sauce, parmesean cheese, etc. for their wedding gift. So they were also thoughtful and personal.
Depends how much you have to spend and how close you are to the family. I usually spend about $50 on a shower gift and $100-200 on a wedding gift.
Or, you might be able to do something nice without spending much at all. My husband and I have used airline miles or credit card rewards or hotel reward programs to gift hotel spa packages on the honeymoon, or upgrade their honeymoon plane tickets to 1st class. If you are a frequent traveler you can often share your rewards...if you don't mind giving an experience rather than a tangible gift item.
It's according to how close to the people getting married that I am. (Or if it's a business type of thing.) If we are close, it's more. If we're not, it's less. I typically look at what they have registered for, and choose based on what they want (and if I'm in love with it! LOL!) and a figure I have in mind to spend. I tend to spend more than I probably need to if I fall in love with a particular gift.
I suggest since the bride is special to you, that you look at her registry and go from there. You might also go in with someone else to get a really expensive thing, something that she wants but may not get from just one family.
If you are giving a shower gift by yourself, and you don't consider it to be too much money, I'd say between $50 - $60 for the gift (not counting the wrapping) and $100 for the wedding gift. Perhaps you can give her a place setting of china for the wedding gift.
Dawn
Shower 50 wedding 100 here.
immediate family/friends....$40/shower, closer to $75 for the wedding.
I also tend to do themed gifts. For the wedding I like to give a picture frame with the $$ framed inside it. Usually, it's a $25 frame with $50 in it.
I also like to give pretty candy dishes, filled with candy & $$.
& for my niece's wedding, I did a gift bag filled with noisemakers, Hershey Hugs/Kisses, lots of curly ribbon...& $$. The note inside said, "Make Life Joyous & Fun-filled". She is child-free & was gaining 2 stepsons. :)
Shower: $25 to $50. Wedding: $50 to $75.
Since you are close friends with the bride and her family, I would send a gift for the shower $40-$50 off her list. Find a place that offers free wrapping and free shipping. Or a gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond or where ever she is registered. We usually give a check to the bride and groom- usually $150-$250 depending on how well we know the couple, how well off they are, and what our budget looks like at that time.
wow, y'all spend a lot of money on showers!
since you're going to spend a lot of just GETTING to the wedding and will give a nice gift there, i'd keep the shower gift to $20-$50 max.
i'm DYING over the rachel english trifle idea........
:) khairete
S.
I would look at her registry and see if there is something "kitchen/serving" for under $100 for the shower (including tax and shipping). Unless it is a family member, I keep shower gifts under $100.
As for the wedding... a card with a check is perfect. How much do I spend? Close friends and family $250, everyone else $150. We don't factor in the cost of our travel because we can always opt not to attend and there have been many times when the cost of attending is prohibitive.
About $50 for shower and $150 check or little less for bridal gift from registry.
Fifty bucks.
More for a family member.
Since you won't be going to the shower, just get a gift for when you go to the wedding in the summer.
Since this is a close friend that you've known a long time, spend $50 - $75.
I certainly would not go over $100.
Since you aren't attending the shower, you don't 'HAVE' to send a gift.
As a wedding gift, I would buy a nice gift or gift card to Target or Bed,Bath Beyond of $20 - 50.
How much or how little is such a personal decision. It depends on what you can afford so just because Betty Jo can afford a hundred dollar item doesn't mean you can. Brainstorm, think about what items you would have liked or loved to get that you didn't get, or think about that one item you absolutely love and take it from there. IF all else fails, ask the lady if she is registered. A registry really takes the guess work out because she has taken the time to list the things that she really wants.
Since you are going to the wedding just buy one gift.
It depends on how close we are. I usually look at the registry and try to make a little theme. Like, if they have cookie sheets and measuring spoons and stuff I'll get the big one, usually the cookie sheets or cake pan or whatever, and fill it with the little cheaper ones, like spatulas and measuring spoons, plus a cookie or cake mix, or a handwritten recipe. I don't generally spend as much on the shower as the wedding, and in fact, unless they're a really close friend/family member, I haven't done shower gifts. The most I've ever spent on a wedding was 100 and that was my sister's. She didn't have any bridal showers, though.
