Honestly, Just Wondering

There are two trains of thoughts regarding birthdays:
1) Either those that enjoy & celebrate theirs
-or-
2) Those that treat it like any other day.

For those in group #1, they simply celebrate another year on this planet
and tend to treat themselves to their favorite things.

The other group (#2), may tend to think of it as just any other day. Having
said this, some people in group #2 may take another day as their most
cherished/favorite day like Superbowl, Christmas, New Year's Eve etc.

It's a personal preference.
Can be family based or based upon experiences from childhood.

Whatever the case may be, I hope everyone enjoys their special day
wether it be the day they were brought into this world, Valentine's Day,
Christmas Day, Mother's/Father's Day etc.

May a little sunshine & laughter fall into everyone's life!

I don't get it, either. Personally, I view it as American society becoming more and more "Me" oriented. It's self love gone too far.

Who knows, maybe their parents treated their birthdays like national holidays when they were children? Mine certainly didn't. I mean, we celebrated, and it was a special day and all that... but the world didn't cease to spin, either. And I seem to see more and more of that mentality (everything stops to celebrate MY CHILD or ME or whatever) all the time.

I think it's ridiculous.
But that's just my opinion.

Yep-don't get it either. At all. Especially a weekday. I agree. If be more likely to make it a long weekend--even if it's not the exact day.
I would wonder about a grown adult having the reaction you described. Maybe she always got everything she ever wanted growing up? Who knows? Not to mention the professional damage she has done to her reputation: shirking responsibility AND pitching a fit. Yuk.

Oooooh, I was hoping to hear from a few Birthday Taker Off-ers on this one...but alas, not one answered.

I used to have (used to have, meaning EX) single girlfriend, who was totally into her birthday as you mention. It was all about her, everyone was supposed to drop everything and meet up with her for lunch or drinks or dinner or cake and you must come dressed to impress with nice gifts, or she'd pout and remind you how you did not celebrate her day......turns out her mom threw lavish birthday parties for her every single year as a child, and when her parents divorced this behavior escalated.......then one year after the February birth of my 3rd baby when I was 41+ years old, and still nursing at night when she turned 40 that September, I cancelled celebrating her big day due to vomiting children and traveling husband....and we have never spoken since. Touche!

I don't know why either.

I am one who does not advertise my birthday and I actually feel down about it and dread it. This was the first year in a long time that I actually did not shut down my facebook page on my birthday. For years, I would just shut my account down for 2 days. This year, only a couple of people noticed after the fact when a family member posted something. I just don't like the attention.

My husband knows how I am and he has never had any huge celebration, etc because we are both pretty much the same way... it is just another day. However, when our daughter was born, we did acknowledge our birthday as well as hers especially. We always have a small cake, the 3 of us get together and will have a gift or flowers.

I do think it is important to teach children from a young age about the importance of big days such as Birthdays, Mother's Day, Father's Day, etc.

I don't understand why some people choose to celebrate an entire month, entire week and then have a huge day. If that is what they like, go for it... not judging

When I was in corporate, there were a few people who were adamant about being off on a birthday and it did not matter what was going on.

As for me, I am perfectly fine with something very low key to zero on that day of the year. I am appreciative that it is not the alternative to a birthday but I just don't get why some adults overcompensate their birthday... unless, of course, it has something to do with their culture or upbringing.

It is a far cry from a National Holiday in our household.

It sounds like the year of entitlement. Everybody has to validate everybody. Well, the world does not work that way. You know your birthday and after certain milestones (6, 16, 18, 21) they all begin to roll into each other.

Your family may remember and your friends but not always the case. The company you work for may have a computer that generates cards for all members and sends them out (not a requirement). If you must take off that day, then do it quietly, no one else is really interested in why. There is too much put into the day of birth and the day of this and the day of that just to get a day off from work. If companies gave everyone a day off there would probably be no one to do the work in the company.

I come from a time in the country that birthdays were special but not every year. We celebrated the milestone ones and moved on. Sorry if it comes off harsh. Again what is important to one is not important to another.

In business it does not matter when or who has the BD it is just another working day. Celebrate after work and be done with it. No drama needed. She could be fired or she could have killed any chances for advancement within the company with her actions. That would be more important to me than the birthday day off.

the other S.

PS Good for you for stepping up. You just might get the next promotion before miss temper tantrum and she won't know why.

I don't get it either.

My parents always made our birthdays special when we were kids, and those are wonderful memories. However, as an adult, I wouldn't think or feel like I had to have my birthday off. Like you, we celebrate adult birthdays when people can get together. Except for major milestone birthdays, we don't do much other than a dinner at home or favorite restaurant.

Moreover, I cannot imagine missing an important meeting at work just because of a birthday. Crying at work and throwing a hissy fit because you have to work on your birthday? That would certainly leave an impression with me, and it wouldn't be a good one. To me, it just smacks of entitlement.

I get that people like to celebrate, but when you are an adult and you have work responsibilities and people counting on you, this seems childish, immature, and irresponsible. She could have celebrated her wonderful little self
after work or taken another day when it wouldn't inconvenience her boss, co-workers, and board members.

You were a great team player to step in and offer a solution for this situation. I sure hope your bosses appreciated this!

I'm with you. I have no idea where this comes from. When they were kids, these people didn't stay home from school on their birthdays, did they? No, they went to school, probably with a few dozen cupcakes for the class. (That's not allowed anymore in most schools, but I'm sure it was when this woman was a child.)

If anything, I would think people would want a day off on the following day, for those who plan to go out and get drunk with their friends (who have to work the next day). So it's wacky.

I think it's more a reflection of people's sense that they are not valued or special, either in the eyes of their family, their friends, or their boss. They don't know if anyone is going to treat them to a great day, so they plan it themselves. They, for some reason, get indignant that the world doesn't stop to recognize their significant moments.

I think the crying part is extremely immature and a good way for someone to get herself fired if she's that dramatic about other things. I can't imagine an office trying to schedule meetings not only around holidays and staff members' business travel but also around birthdays. What's next? Kids' birthdays and spouse birthdays? This woman knows what date her birthday falls on every year. She's perfectly capable of requesting a vacation day for that date 6 months in advance. People don't have to know why. Then when someone's planning a meeting, the central calendar will show that she is off and the whole problem is avoided. I think she waited until the last minute to either make a scene, or to hope someone would plan something for her and then that didn't happen.

I don't think companies should buy into it. If I had a staff member who was so agitated and spent the day crying vs. working, I'd be tempted to send her home and charge her for a personal day. I'd surely remember it when it was time for her performance review.

I think there are a couple of people who take their birthdays off sometimes and that's fine if it's a "hey, I have vacation time. Might as well do something fun for my bday" approach. But if anyone HAD to have their bday off, they'd be laughed out of my company. So I don't get it either.

I have never taken my birthday off. And frankly, ever since I turned 50, I prefer it to slip quietly past! lol

I am with you in that around here we celebrate whatever holiday or birthday we may have missed when we are all together. The being together MAKES it a celebration!

I'm with you. I don't get it. I don't think I've ever taken off my birthday. And we juggle around practically every holiday because we have kids with our ex's. My ex husband is 45, he emailed me and asked if I could keep our kids on his weekend because he and his wife wanted to celebrate their anniversary on their exact day. WHY? You only have the kids 4 days a month, you can't go out one of those other 25+ days you don't have them? I don't know, maybe I'm old and don't care much or am not that self centered. Curious to see what the birthday-taker-offers say. lol

I never took my birthday off when I had full time professional jobs. Maybe when I worked flexible jobs at times...But. To your questions:

Why don't they make it a Monday or Friday to make long weekend?
That's still taking a day off so why do you seem to prefer that they do that?

Why do some people group their birthdays together or delay them but these other people don't?
These other people want to take their birthday off on the day of their birthday.

Is their birthday considered a national holiday to them?
No, they think it's their birthday.

This is one of millions of ways people are different. The only people who should care are their bosses. Some jobs allow for flexibility, or people need to use their sick days somehow, so meh, why not on a birthday if they've got the time coming. The woman crying because she couldn't sounds like an extreme case and she probably has plenty of other weird issues too.

Its OK to have pet peeves like people taking their birthdays off :) I hate when people think everyone on the planet should remember their birthdays even worse.

I know plenty of people who work on their birthday.
In the office we use to treat them to lunch - most everyone had their turn.
My birthday is Dec 26 and the company I worked for was British based - they always gave Boxing Day (Dec 26) off as part of the Christmas holiday so
I always had my birthday off - I didn't have any choice about it.
Going with family to see a movie, a meal out and birthday cake at home is a full birthday for me!

I have not heard of this. This is not typical behavior. Most children go to school on their b-days and employed people go to work.

You are surrounded by lunatics (just kidding).

For some reason, I always get super depressed on my b'day. Don't know why, it's been this way every year since I turned 11. I'm fine the day before and the day after, and I'm a generally happy person. But on my b'day, I just want to curl up in a dark corner and not interact with anyone. I don't work, so I have the luxury of doing just that (my family understands and indulges my ridiculousness). If I DID work, I'd probably take the day off if I could. Not to celebrate, just to avoid social interaction on that day. Strange, yeah?

So there's one reason why someone might take off work on their b'day, although probably not the most common reason...

I will note that if something rather important at work happened to fall on my b'day, THAT would trump any sad feelings I might have.

I'd say that was an over the top reaction. I'm guessing she's a drama queen in general with that reaction. Why in the world would you endanger your job for a day?

Our company has a floating holiday that we get for our birthday, but I would totally ask to take the Monday if it were really on a Tuesday. But it's a day - I celebrate when it's convenient.

ETA: if work needed to be done, she shouldn't have thrown a two year old hissy fit. Oh well...some people never grow up.

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It's my birthday. I take it off. I don't want to "work"...my mom raised me that birthday's are important...it was a day to celebrate YOU...it didn't mater if the "party" was later...it was a day to celebrate you...yes...I still had to got school as a kid...but my mom made a big ta-do about birthdays. Our birthday's were only 2 days apart too and my mom always made me feel special on my birthday and we tried to do the same for her...

If they aren't important to you? Celebrate when and how you want.

Why does this bother you? It's really no different that someone calling in sick mid-week.

If you don't care and you aren't judging, then why say that taking your birthday off is acting like it's a "national holiday" and use an extreme example of a woman who had some kind of tantrum to exemplify people who take the day off?

I don't really celebrate my birthday, and sometimes have trouble remembering my age. But if someone else wants to use vacation time to celebrate their birthday, why not?

Your birthday is the ONLY day of the year when YOU are celebrated. I believe it is a special day and should be celebrated. We all need to be reminded exactly how wonderful we are as individuals. We deserve to be remembered and to receive gifts and to be told we are loved and special.

With so many people working longer hours and all the stress in day to day living taking ONE day a year to celebrate ourselves is not over the top.

I don't know why either. Birthdays in my family have always been low key but I do know a lot of people who take the day off work, have big dinner parties, etc. It's just a matter of personal preference.

If I have taken my birthday off its because it was during vacation. My birthday is right around Easter.

I see it a lot here at work. Its strange.

I'm with you. I don't get it either. My birthday is in early May so we usually celebrate it on Mother's Day by someone (usually my mom or my sister) getting a cake, sticking some candles in it and singing. My dad's birthday is 8 days after mine so sometimes they get combined. Growing up, because of the timing of my birthday it's taken a backseat to graduations, proms, etc., really not a big deal.

We do the same thing with our kids - they have a friend party sometime near their birthday. Then we usually celebrate with the family sometime near the birthday...my January baby's day was combined with my Nana's birthday, my two March babies get celebrated together, sometimes with St. Patrick's Day or their other great-grandmother's birthday, our November baby gets celebrated on Thanksgiving along with 5 other November birthdays, etc. On their actual day we're sure to make a special meal (either breakfast or dinner, depending on the day's schedule) and blow out candles in a small dessert.

I do find the "it's my birthday, I'm taking the day off" tactic to be a bit juvenile. I can see treating oneself to a day off every now and again when it doesn't interfere with work, but if there is something important going on, show up!

I've never taken a day off for my birthday. But I also don't care if others do. Why does it bother you?

I don't work outside the home but I do notice a bigger deal being made over adult birthdays. Growing up my parents made a fuss over we kids' birthdays but we scarcely knew when their birthdays were (not that that's good either).

Seems a little self-indulgent to me.

It's fun to be fussed over on your birthday but I don't think it excuses you from your responsibilities as an adult.

JMO.

Some people take the day off of work to avoid the awkward attention from co-workers. You know, they run out and buy a cake, circulate a card and have an embarrassing celebration in the break room...

Seriously the thought of it alone is enough to make wanna call in already, and my birthday is not til April.

I never have taken my birthday off. I have friends that do and I personally think its weird to take a day off in the middle of the week.

Nope, if my birthday falls on Monday-Friday, I am at work. Unless my husband were to plan something very special for the day, I will work. No, I don't throw a fit on my actual birthday if I have to work. I work in a career that I love...(most of the time).

Hi,
I don't think it's cultural, I think it might be quite individual. In one part of my family, the adult birthdays are akin to a religiously observed month! Others in the same side of the family not so much. I have noticed it, as you have, and wondered "Huh?" But most seem happy with how they celebrate it. To answer you direct question, no, I have never taken my birthday off. Nor did I want to. I was fortunate in that my day at work was made lovely, as I worked with a great team of women.

soooo this chick made a bad call and you benefited from it? I wouldn't complain! :)

Birthday's are birthday's...it's a special day for some. For people like you? It's not. You state you aren't judging, but I feel/read a lot of judge on the post. To be honest? You benefited from her hissy-fit. You might benefit even more if she continues to behave that way. I can't imagine crying over working on my birthday, it's like crying over spilled milk.

I wouldn't take my birthday off. I certainly wouldn't pitch an unprofessional fit about it either for an event that I helped plan.

I do my best to make all five (include Tyler in this) of my boy's (I know Tyler will roll his eyes when I call him a boy) birthday's special. I hope it is.

I am in the take off if you can camp. I think it's nice to have a day where you can do whatever you like and not have to go to work if you don't want to. I've worked plenty of jobs where that wasn't an option and when it wasn't I was fine with that and worked. However if I could take off, I would in a heartbeat.

We homeschool so on each of our birthdays it's a day off. I started that tradition a long time ago. We enjoy it as a family and it works for us. I think it's funny that a lot of people view it as entitlement. I know other schools take off for a myriad of reasons. Last week local schools dismissed at noon because of football. They also take off for various planning days or snow days. We take off for our birthdays. Except my daughter because she's usually done with school by her birthday.

I don't think we think of ourselves as entitled. As a matter of fact my daughter will turn 16 this summer. When asked what she wanted to do to celebrate her birthday she said probably just invite a couple of girls and hang out. I asked her about a traditional party and she said are you kidding? No thanks! She also knows she's not getting a new car or new to her car for her birthday like so many of her friends. I will match her dime for dime on what she saves toward her car but I will not be more vested in it than she is.

Just my take from my perspective.

Blessings!
L.

There are years I barely remember mine is coming up. It's a non-event for me, so I don't get it. More concerned about my kids' birthdays and even then I don't pull them from school for their special days.

I don't know anyone who takes off work for their birthday unless their spouse has planned an out of town event and then only if their bday falls on a Friday.

My birthday is right at the end of the year, but if I have any days off left I like to use it then. If I can get the day off, my aunt will take it off as well and we'll hang out. It's nice to have a designated day to just spend with my aunt, or reading and taking bubble baths if I want. I mean, it's not a huge deal, but it's nice to have one day a year that celebrates me, even if it's just with a bubble bath and piece of cake I don't have to share with anyone else.

If my birthday falls on a Friday or Monday, I might take off to have a long weekend.
Sometimes I take my vacation during the week of my birthday.
But to take off in the middle of the week just because it's my birthday? Nah.

My birthday has been upgraded to an INTERGALATIC HOLIDAY. LOL. Every year faithfully I take off the day of my birthday, some years I take a few days off around my birthday. I always have plans set and love celebrating still being alive another year. I've been doing this for about 20+ years. I started this long before I had any children of my own. I started it when three of the guys I grew up with died before they even hit 20 years old. They each died from medical problems. It impacted me in such a way that I didn't want to wait to celebrate my birthday.

I use the time to reflect, enjoy the day, and just relax with friends or family.

When my children were really young, I would have a day of fun with them by taking them to multiple places like the zoo, pool, park and beach all on the same day. They would be exhausted and so would I but oh the memories we had from those good times. They are all in their 20's now and still talk about the weekends of fun. Those were the years my actual birthday was on a Friday, Saturday, Sunday or Monday.

Since I always make certain I request this day off in January, the workload or meetings are scheduled around me being off or covered by my coworkers who also have specific dates they take off and I cover them.

My birthday is in early August and we always celebrate birthdays on the actual birth date but may followup with an extensive party on the weekend after the actual date but the immediate family and close by cousins always swung by for cake and ice cream on the exact day.

In keeping with the theme that my birthday is important. I now celebrate it for a full 30 days. LOL. It gives anyone who may have forgotten the opportunity to wish me well without feeling bad about missing the actual day. I even still accept gifts too for a full 30 days after the actual date of my birthday. Yes that puts me into another month but life is worth celebrating so we celebrate big and long.

I hope this clears it all up.

My birthday is close to Thanksgiving, there are often times I get it off because it falls during the holiday weekend. I might request it off, to have a day to myself- no kids, no hubby a day to clean and get things done. But I have worked many times on my birthday. I would be more willing, look more forward to taking off M or F to make it a long weekend. Usually now, my parents are out of town, and my birthday just slips on by. Everyone else in my family has birthday May-Oct (when My parents are in town) and all are celebrated, but mine gets tossed under the rug. :)

IF I CAN, I will take off from work on my birthday. To me it’s usually about pampering myself on a special day and whatever I do, I usually do it by myself (long walk, pedicure/massage, special lunch).
That said, it’s not always possible; I only have so many vacation days a year and if I’m taking vacation soon for something else or if I know I want to take my kids somewhere (my bday is during the summer), then I skip it, but I always enjoy it when I can take it off and I don’t get upset if I can’t because at least for me it’s a choice and not a must.

Kristin C., I, too, get depressed at my birthday.

Also I get depressed when the clock strikes another New Years Day and everyone else is screaming happy. I smile to hide sadness (I felt that way since about age 11, too).

I am glad that others make a big deal of their birthdays and take the day off. Those type people are the happiest and bring joy to the world.

I never would have thought to take my birthday off work, unless of course I was planning to take a holiday around my birthday. I also wouldn't dream of taking my kids out of school on their birthdays (even though one is in July, so he is never in school)! We always make a point of doing something special on the actual day, be it a nice meal and cake or an outing. If the birthday lands during the week we save the actual party for the weekend. Maybe this lady has other issues, and the birthday thing just set her off...

Don't know, I wouldn't think of taking my birthday off. I have actually never heard of anyone in my office doing it either.

In my youngest's class there were a couple kids that would bring in snacks the day before so they could take their birthday off so maybe this is part of that trend?

My birthday became less important after I had a child. Then the child's birthday becomes the big event. Some single friends still celebrate their birthdays in a self-absorbed way.

I asked the receptionist at the doc's office, when asked for my birthdate, if there were a lot of other people with my birthdate. She laughed and said "yes."

Now, when my workplace tries to have us work a longer day than usual on Halloween. . .

I get a paid floating holiday for my birthday. It is my choice to take the day off or use it in the future.

I never take the day off. My family has to work and I personally rather spend my time with my family.

However, if someone feels they deserve 1 day a year to themselves, our contract allows for it.

My spousal equivalent's daughter (24) does this. She has never gone to school/classes in college/work on her birthday in April. She is the baby of the family and her mother started this with her in kindergarten. I think it's ridiculous. As for myself, I'd rather be with people on my birthday than sit around my house and do nothing, which is what she does. To me, that seems completely boring.

My son (now 43) has never worked on his birthday because he just doesn't want to. His bd is Dec 27th.

I get a paid day of that I can take any time within the year. I don't think I've ever taken my actual birthday off. I'd much rather be able to choose.

I usually try to take my birthday off because if I don't do anything with my day, no one else does - not my husband or kids, and my parents live far away. So it's my opportunity to do what I want on just one day! My day usually falls during one of our kids' early-out weekends, so I usually try to take off, and make a long weekend out of it for a family trip or something. If we're at home, I'll sleep in, get a massage, go to the gym, maybe have a special dessert with my family... nothing big, but just my choices for one day.
Having said that, NEVER in a million years would I throw a fit about my plans shifting due to a work, family or another commitment. While I love planning my day my way, I'm a grown up. Which your colleague clearly isn't.

I usually take the day off on my birthday. I wasn't able to this year because things were really stressful (preschool teacher) and it was too early in the year to take off. But I usually do. It's just nice to have a day off while my kids are in school so I can do whatever I want all alone. My husband works nights so I am usually "on" from 5am to 11pm. So it's just nice to have that 1 day to myself.