My husband and I are separated and he just started getting BAH for going to school, he was out of work from the military from jan-april and i had to cover all the bills. He got unemployment in mid-april and then his unemployment stopped three weeks ago. So I have been pulling all the weight. Our kids live with me, my daughter is in school and my son goes to daycare while i am work. I take care of everything. He told me that the BAH that he gets for school belongs to him and him only now that we are separated. The money he gets is free money from the military for being in sch, but how much he gets depends on if he has dependents or not. I was told that until we get a divorce, I am entitled to half of his BAH, vets benefits and once we get a divorce, some of those benefits go to the children. is this true? Since we are separated.. Can he really do that?? Can he legally not give me half? Or do I get nothing. Oh, and he just got two jobs so yeah,
Ok, nothing has happened yet, but I wanted to update. I was told by an individual that if he is unemployed or until he gets his first paycheck, then his BAH is considered as income and the children are entitled to it. This individual was someone from the VA office. Now, I want to make it clear that I am not after his BAH for myself or to spiteful in any way and it seems like from some responses that, that is how some of you are taking it..... right now since that is his income...... I feel I should not be left taking of our children alone. If this person from the VA is not telling me the correct things, then I don't know what else to do until we go to court. If he has a paycheck coming in, then his BAH to me is not of concern. It is only a matter right now because, I refuse to take care of our kids by myself while he goes off and blows 1500. I could see if he is using it for school, which he is not. I understand that he gets the money because he is going to school, but his BAH is dependent based. If it wasn't for the children and I, he would not be getting 1500 he would be getting less than that. So I believe, regardless if it's for his school, some of his BAH should go to his children. Now, if his BAH was based on him not having any dependents, then I would understand how his children would not get any, but it is. Does this make sense to anyone else?
So he is out of the military?
Is he doing the boot strap program?
You need to contact a lawyer or the JAG on base.
I'm actually contacting one of my friends who is an officer and in personnel so as soon as I hear back from her - I'll let you know what she says.
I work for the Army as an Education Advisor. I hope I can clear up some confusion.
Whether you are entitled to this or any of the benefits he earned by serving depends on your state's laws. You need to talk to an attorney who is well versed in military divorces. But be aware....no matter what you ask for, that money isn't for you, it's for the care of the children. Be careful how you word this when you address it in court.
You are not necessarily entitled to any of this money. He gets it for going to school to cover school related costs of living, not family related costs of living.
Your husband is using the Chapter 33 Post 9-11 GI Bill. The BAH he gets for going to school is the E-5 rate, with dependents, for his zip code, and based on how many months he has deployed overseas. It has nothing to do with you or the kids. It's just the amount he's entitled to for going to school. I advise that you leave this alone entirely, so as not to seem like the hateful woman who would cause him to have to drop out of school because he can't afford gas to get there. Go after his paycheck, not the VA benefits he EARNED by serving. They are NOT the same thing.
If he were active duty, you'd be entitled to part of his active duty pay-related-BAH because he'd be bringing home a regular paycheck and the BAH with dependents part of his paycheck would be FOR his family.
The BAH he is getting as a part of his VA benefit for going to school is an entirely different animal altogether. It is to defray the costs of going to school.
HOWEVER, regardless of your state's laws, his children should be getting some type of support out of his paycheck.
I wish you the best of luck. If you have any questions, don't hesitate to message me.
ETA: The BAH he gets for school is NOT based on his family situation. Regardless of whether or not he is married with kids, he is using Ch 33 and therefore gets the E-5-with-dependents rate.
I know it's confusing, but education benefits are not the same as regular BAH.
HOWEVER, I do think that he should be sending some money for the care of his children. You need to contact an attorney and get a separation order into place in the interim so that there is a court ordered payment in place.
He's right. The school money is solely his. (read Christy's response for the details on that)
((Similar to if you went back to school post divorce and won scholarships and grants, and took out loans... the courts would NOT give him your aid.))
The REST on the other hand, is a different matter. However, if you're the primary earner, expect to be paying *him* child support (unless you end up with sole custody), and possibly spousal support, although that can change once he starts earning. Insurance and ret benefits and the rest gets settled by the courts.
Divorce courts (in community property states) split the assets in half, but it doesn't work out that each person gets half of what the other person has... if that makes sense. Meaning that if I'm have 12k and my husband has 100k, he doesn't take 6k from my 12... he hands over 38k, so that we each have 50. But that's only in the original "division". After that Child Support & Spousal Support vary enourmously. Ranging from about 1/20th - 1/3 of the person's income to NONE (aka if you have the kids 100% of the time, you wouldn't be paying him child support, and if you haven't been married long enough -in WA it's 10 years- neither would pay spousal support).
The way the formulas break down vary a LOT from state to state.
Once you go to court and have a decree for child support file the papers with child support enforcement. They will contact his employers and have his child support deducted from his salary. That way it will come directly to you without going through him.
If he stays employed then you can count on that money to continue coming unless there is some issue at his work in the payroll office. That happened to me once and they contacted the child support enforcement that they were changing their paydays but child support does not contact anyone with changes. They would be on the phone every day for hours and hours for the thousands of people they handle child support for.
As for division of the family assets I think the judge and attorneys will be the ones that decide how that goes.
I would contact the office of Veteran's Affairs in your area.
They can't give you legal advice, but they can explain what you may or may not be entitled to.
It may be possible that some of the funds he receives are for re-training or re-education so that he CAN support the kids better in the future.
I would contact Veteran's affairs.
They will have the best answers.
VA benifits are tricky compared to being active duty. I would go to your local unemployment office and see if they have a VA Claims person there than can help you wade through the red tape of the VA. I do know on active duty, he would have to give you half of the BAH if you didn't live in base housing and keep Tricare on you and the kids till the divorce was through...............But the BAH and money he gets now is on top of the GI bill paying for his school.
Good luck!
S.
Yes, it makes perfect sense. I'm not a VA Benefits expert, and unfortunately, neither are most of the people that work for the VA. You need to get a lawyer involved if you haven't already. Get an emergency hearing if you are unable to cover the living expenses for you & the children between now & when your scheduled court date is. If you ARE able to cover it, I would let it be until you go to court. Then, if it turns out that he that he was supposed to be giving you a portion of the money for however many months, he'll just owe you back pay.
by law he has to give you everything that the judge or courts decided on...weither he has a job or not. if he was never ordered to pay a certain amount then he doesnt have to give you a penny. now, morally he should give you something, of course but that doesnt mean he will or has to. so if he was ordered then go to court and file a show cause. if you never had anything ordered then get to the court house and file already. these children deserve better.
