My 3rd grade dtr is having some real issues with walking into the school alone. Her brother, who is now in Jr High, used to walk with her into school everyday. He never walked her to class, in fact, their classes were at different ends of the school. In other words, he only walked with her from the car to the school doors. Now that he is in Jr High my dtr is having a total anxiety attack. I have had to walk her to class every day in tears. Once school starts, she is fine in class. I tried to let her off at the curb thinking she would be better without me & that didn't work. Her teacher said I shouldn't walk her into school but I'm not sure how to get her over this minus all the tears. She then gets embarassed because she's crying in front of her peers. She has always been an extremely shy child but has had some very nice friends at her school. Her best friend is even in her class and has walked her to her room but still the tears. Does anyone have any suggestions or experienced this? It breaks my heart to see her crying every morning..help
Is there a younger child she could help walk into school? You know, a "pass the baton", "now you're older & in charge" type of thing?
Is there anyone that you could carpool with?
Any chance you can carpool with one of her friends? That way, they'd walk in together. At least until she gets used to her brother not being there. Beginning of school is always a tough transition (new teacher, new classroom, new friends). I hope your little girl feels better about this soon!
Is there a special photo of her and her brother you can put a copy of in her locker? Some times our kids need us in ways we do not expect and they are children for a short time so if you can give her an end date of walking her to the door try that.
Like on September 21st I will only walk with you to the front door then in another week it is a drop off at the curb. Trust your gut if you thinks she needs a little help then give it. Good Luck!
J. O
You have some good suggestions here, I especially like the idea of having her help a younger child.
But I wanted to respond about the teacher - my son's Kinder teacher had the same attitude about parent drop off VS coming in with the group. I just continued to drop him at his classroom because it meant the difference between a successful morning and crying galore!
Going with the flow and doing everything the same as everyone else is just not as important as your child's individual needs at this point in this situation, and if the teacher can't see that then too bad for her.
The harder I pushed my son in the crying situation the worse it got, when I finally just decided to go against what the teacher wanted (after talking to her about it and her not seeing it my way) and do what was best for him, we had successful mornings. This year in first grade he is running off to the playground in the mornings with hardly a goodbye, no tears, no problems lining up with the class, he just needed that security that I would give him what he NEEDED from me at the time.
For an especially shy third grader, who has "lost" her security item (her brother), I think this is totally ok and expected. Do what you know is right for your child, she won't still be asking you to walk her to the door in high school - I promise! :)
Many parents walked their 3rd graders to the classroom last year.
I did on days she had anxiety about bullies and such.
I think she will outgrow it when she settles down. It would break my heart too.
Could you compromise with her? Tell her you'll walk her to the door entrance of the school, but then she must find her way once inside.
Get your son to talk to her about being brave. Get him to do that then say he'll walk her in for 3 days so that she can see it's not scary then she can try on her own.
I don't really have anything to suggest but at our school, all the kids go to the playground and when the bell rings, they line up with their class and then walk to their room as a class. I have a 3rd grader and 6th grader. I guess if I were you I would see if her BFF could meet her inside the door each morning so all you had to do was drop her off at the curb and then the friend could take over. I honestly don't think its helping her by you walking her to her class every day. I hope you find something that works, good luck!
