He Only Wants Me!

You need your rest as much as he does. If letting him sleep with you is the best way for both of you to rest, then go for it. My eight year old would only sleep with us until she was five and we were OK with it, because we needed rest too, otherwise we were not very patient parents! My two year old still sleeps with us. She, too, won't sleep anywhere else. It's OK. Is there also some emotional reason he may need you now? Is Dad not around? Also changing a daycare center is new to a child, and they aren't verbal so he needs the safety of you. And you need your rest.

S.!
Bless your heart. I know exactly what you're going through. I just went through the same thing with my 16 month old son. He was a champion sleeper until suddenly one day, I was up with him two or three times during the night and he would just cry and cry unless i was holding him. UGH! I was frustrated and at my wits end. After I stopped and thought about how suddenly it started, I realized that there had to be a reason. Sure enough. He had three molars coming in at the same time and I think he would wake up with them hurting him. I started giving him some tylenol until they came through, but he was already in the habit of waking and screaming unless I was holding him. This lasted for a month! Finally, I did the Ferber method. I didn't know what else to do. A friend said that I should stick with the method for 2 weeks, but it only took two days! I would lay him down in his bed after a familiar routine and I would go in there (first after 5 mins) and speak softly to him and pat his back, but never pick him up! After that, go to ten minutes, then 15, then every 20 mins until he finally falls asleep. I also did this when he woke up in the middle of the night. It was amazing how fast he caught on. After two days he was back to putting himself to sleep and staying asleep for 11 hours. I think that once something disrupted his schedule, he needed a push in the right direction. It's not easy, Girl! But stick with it and you'll both be doing great again in no time. Let me know what happens!
L.

Hello, I go through this faze on occassion with my 20 month old and have since she was 10 months. She slepts in our room in her crib. Sometimes I just need to lay in the room with her and sometimes even when I am there she is begging for me to pick her up. This is the "fight sleep faze because they might miss something" When she does this I walk out of the room and close the door sometimes within 10-15 minutes she will fall asleep. Yes, with him changing his normal routine and environment he needs to feel secure and you are his security. This is what part of being a Mommy is all about. If we make them feel secure now they will be secure adults. I have 5 children ages 16 yrs down to the 20 mnths and have done this with all my children. They are growing up to be secure adults. Nothing feels better as a Mommy then knowning that your children feel safe with you and they know they can always come to you no matter what! Good Luck and Many pleasant Dreams to you (Let's Hope)It is worse when they get sick.

Maybe ask the daycare if they are playing music at naptime. I know at my daughters day care they do and that might soothe him.

I have a 2 yr old and she just recently went through a phase where she wanted nothing to do with her own bed or room. She has always slept in her own bed. So it was really hard having to sleep with her, since she was always used to sleeping by herself, she wouldn't sleep comfortably with me, and neither would I. So we took her to the store and let her pick out what blankets, sheets, pillows, whatever she wanted,(dora the explorer) and we would tell her Dora will be sad if you don't sleep with her, and ever since then she has been fine. But then again my daughter is 2, and your son is 1. Just an idea!!!

Hi S.,
Your son sounds like ours. Mine is 2 years old and we still hold him to help him fall asleep. We started that when he was a baby, and hasn't grown out of it yet. If he wakes up at night, we try to put him back to sleep by rocking him, or holding him. As soon as he falls asleep in our arms, we gently put him back in his bed. It works sometimes, but other times, we just put him in bed with us. That way he sleeps peacefully, and so do we. :-) We tried just letting him cry himself to sleep, but it just broke our hearts and we just couldn't do it. So we're doing what works for us. Your son is just a little over a year old and I found with our son, it's the most needy time. He still needs us for comfort at night. I know it's important to teach your children independance, but I think when they're little like yours and mine, it's more important to help them feel secure. Even if that means holding them to help them fall asleep, or sleeping with you from time to time. Our son starts off in his bed, but ends up in ours. Right now I'm not going to be too strict with that, but come three years old I'll probably toughen up little by little to get him to sleep in his own bed. I hope this helps. :-)

Do what you are doing every night, even if he throws fits because he is just testing you to see if you will let him have his way again. Maybe if you tell him that he is a big boy and that you will give him a big boy present if he sleeps in his bed it could work just fine. I wish you the best and take care.