Do You Still like Your Husband??

Everything ebbs and flows and hopefully is not a permanent habit, of just disliking or griping... about one's spouse.
It either becomes entrenched or not, and is solvable or not.
But it takes 2.
Both spouses.

Some days are hard, some days are good.
I see it as that.
But overall, I 'like' my Husband. He has good qualities, and other days not so much. I have to remember that.

Nitpicking, can become a habit and a way of life for some.
Ya gotta be cognizant of that. It affects both people. Either eroding the good things, or not.

And then sometimes, dislike is for a very good reason.
Then that is a whole other realm, of marriage stability or viability.

I've been married 14 years.
I also know that everyday is not perfect nor a Hallmark card.
We have 2 kids.

I definitely like my husband and we have a lot in common and always have. Plus, he's funny and fun-loving and that really goes a long way in the daily ins and out, you know? I'm glad I chose the perfect person for me. We're best friends. We're coming up on 15 years of marriage and 19 total together.

Yes, I like him. Sometimes I don't like what he does, or how he reacts, or something he says, or if he leaves his socks about. But yes, I like him. He's funny, smart, challenges me to be my best, caring, and kind to everyone he meets. I liked him for a long time before I ever realized I was in love with him. We've been together for almost 17 years.

Most days, yes, I like my husband... some days, we seem more like friends than a married couple... of course I love him, am IN LOVE with him... but I also have my moments where I'd like to knock his head off :) I'm sure he has moments when he feels the same about me, LOL!!

On Halloween it'll be 25 years together. I soooo dig that man.

He was cool back then but now he's just awesome (if I forget about him leaving our son's winter coat in the doctor's office waiting room this afternoon.)

I still get excited to hear him pull up in his truck. Most people I know cringe and say "oh great, my husband is home now." <insert sarcastic font> How can people live like that?

He's the fun one. I'm the planner/organizer and the "mean one" ( if you ask our four year old.) We are a good mix. There's nobody I rather play "good cop/bad cop" with.

We have been through the sniping part of our marriage, but finally learned how to speak with each other and accept each other for who we are. We figured out just because we cannot change for the other person, does not mean we do not love each other.

And so ,,,, Yes, I look forward to seeing him come home. We like to go and do things together.

He drives me crazy with his endless puns and word rhyming.. His hording of garage sale items.. but over all , yes, he would be a good friend of mine even if we were not married.
Fyi, we have known each other since we were 13 and we have been married for 30 years as of this last Monday!!!

Today I do (actually, all week)! :) Good timing, I'd say, since we're going to Las Vegas for our anniversary next month! I always love him, but of course, we have our moments when we really don't like each other. I'm reading a book loaned to me from a coworker (I guess after too many days complaining about my man) called "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands." I have issues with some of the points brought up by the author, but I still try some of her suggestions... and have actually noticed some very nice, positive results! :) Even when I can't stand being in the same room as him, I can't imagine spending my life with anybody else.

I'm in love with my husband yes, but I also truly like him. There's times we get on each others nerves like any two people, but overall we really enjoy being together. We have our separate interests, but we still do stuff together also. For example, right now he's sitting on the couch watching the Simpsons and I'm on the other end of the couch with my feet on his lap, playing on my laptop. Whenever we're both home, we're always finding a way to touch each other about 90% of the time. Not the passionate sexual kind of touch, but the kind of touch that says "I'm glad you're here." We've been like this for our first 5 years of marriage and I hope we stay like this for the next 50.

Today I cannot stand him! ask me again tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I totally enjoy my husband's company. There is no one one the planet I'd rather spend my time with. We have fun as a family but on the rare occasion we get time alone we have a ball. Do I enjoy my alone time? Sure do, but I'd rather be having fun with him. 16 years of marriage and counting.

Ha. We have the opposite groups.

I can't think of a single one of our couple friends who've been married for 10-15+ years who aren't best buds. Not all fairytale marriages by any means, but they all like/ respect/ enjoy each other's company. In my family, it's even worse. We're talking 30/40/50/60 year marriages where everyone dotes on each other.

I'm more than a bit envious, since my husband and I should have divorced years back.

I think that very often, people who have nothing in common and are totally incompatible get married, and THAT is what happens. The reasons they got married in the first place vary: they had relationship problems but got pregnant; parents pressured them to get married because they thought the spouse would be a good provider; they were horny but didn't believe in sex before marriage...I know people who got married for all those reasons. And now that they have kids, they find that they really do not LIKE their spouse but they "stick it out" because of finances and child care and because they don't want another divorce on their list or whatever. At that point, they are just co-habitating.
To answer your question: Yes, I still like my husband (most of the time). Every once in a while I will think, "who the hell did I marry?!" but most of the time I do really enjoy his company and like him as a person.

Well, we have only been married 2 years so I still love AND like him! But I do know what you are saying. We went to visit a couple who were friends with my hubby before we met. They live in Yuma, a few hours from here, so we were spending the night. OMG! They bitched at each other all day, all night, and the next morning! I told him we were NEVER doing that again! I couldn't stand it. It was so uncomfortable. I feel bad for people like that. This is my second marriage and I divorced my first husband because I didn't want to spend the rest of my life being unhappy. Life is so much better now! =)

I feel lucky too, I still like my husband very much! Not only do I still like him but I still look at him sometimes and think to myself 'damn! He is one good looking man'! :) I also still think about him and get all warm and fuzzy sometimes, even after all these years!

13+ years and going strong!

We are going on 10 years in the spring and I still enjoy hanging out with my husband--we were friends for a few months before dating and always enjoyed talking and hanging out together. It is just hard to have time and energy to for each other with young kids (2 and 5). My parents have been together 44 years--they bicker but usually work it out eventually. They have many separate hobbies but do somethings together. My in laws have about a 6 month head start on my parents but are more affectionate and do more things together.

Most everytime I fill out a profile for some online site, I say, "Ive been married to my husband 37 years and I still like him!" So YES I STILL like him! And Nov 3rd will be 38 years.

I think he is a genuinely good person. Great dad, very considerate, kind, encouraging. I just find it difficult to connect with my husband now. I feel we don't have anything to say to each other and I don't have any sexual attraction to him at all. I definitely don't dislike him. I wish we were more like 'good friends' but to be honest I don't think I would choose to hang out all the time as friends if we were not married. It feels we are more like partners in parenting. I couldn't imagine our kids spending half the week away from me so I would rather it be this way than divorced. I simply couldn't live apart from my kids.

15 years and he is a favorite person in the world. We really enjoy our evenings when the kids are in bed and it is time that the two of us spend together.

I love and like my husband.

My husband is my best friend. There's no one else I'd rather spend time with. We've been together for over 13 years, since we were 16, and have been married for almost 8.

Is every day flowers and rainbows? Of course not! But at the end of the day we respect each other, like each other and treat each other with dignity and love. Sure we argue, often about stupid stuff, but we always forgive and move on.

That's part of our problem right now. Struggling with is actually.

My husband and I have been together for 9 years and married for 6. We have had some VERY difficult times in our marriage and even separated for 6 months during our second year of marriage. Yet throughout all of it we still very much LIKE each other. He is still my best friend and I am his.Like most couples, we do fight, but we try not to behave badly when we are around others lol. I think that to remain friends couples have to invest in themselves (dates, game nights after the kids go to bed,). My husband and I are both very silly and that keeps us laughing all of the time. Laughter is important.

I think you're right - there are so many couples out there that just don't like each other. Though I think more than anything it's a function of people not continuing to improve themselves - their communication, their methods of dealing with frustration and also the willingness to make changes if they are unhappy. For the people that do continue to work on themselves and their relationships, happiness seems much more attainable.

Every couple has their ups and downs, but the ones where both parties make an effort to see beyond themselves/their own needs are the successful ones in my opinion.

I like my husband as a person AND I love him.

after 20 years I can honestly say that most times I dont really like him right now we have grown apart and to be honest most days it is like having three kids. Ask me in a couple months after the therapy maybe it will change

Not today. My DH has taken to watching the clock at events and it bugs the snot out of me.

I'm like you - I DO like my husband and enjoy spending time with him. When he travels, which is often, I really miss him.

And I know he misses us, because if he gets a chance to come back a day early, whether he's in beautiful weather and it's cold or rainy where we are, he'll come back anyway.

Funny, that happened a few weeks ago. His boss, whose wife filed for divorce, asked him why he would want to come back early. He told him that the hotel he was staying at (part of a resort) was nice and he should just enjoy himself - that's what HE would do. When my husband told me that, he added (to me only, NOT to his boss) that perhaps that's one of the reasons his wife filed for divorce. LOL!

Btw, I don't think you're doomed. I'm in year 29 of being married, so I think that means something!

Smiles!
Dawn

My husband and I have occasional friction, but it tends to be mild. Perhaps because after nearly 30 years together, we still love and genuinely like each other. I respect and appreciate him so much, and he goes out of his way to let me know the same. We ask each other often, "Will you marry me?"

I like him most of the time.

I like and love my husband. He is my best friend, my support system, and we are in an amazingly good place. After 14 years, he still makes my tummy get butterflies. :)

My hubby and I definitely have our issues, but we are crazy in love. And yes, MOST days I really do like him!

*sigh*

...yes, I still like him. Even when we are driving each other crazy, which happens sometimes. I like S.L.'s comment about every day not being a Hallmark card.

I miss him when he travels for work, even though I am excellent at keeping myself busy. And I look forward to our evenings out. We have a good time together. Fortunately our couple friends do too...I would hate to be out with a bickering couple...like visiting mom and dad, with no special food made for you by mom : )

We are a blended family and the first few years were tough. I might have thought he was crazy a few times during those years, but I never didn't like him, if that makes sense.

Good question. Thanks for reminding me how lucky I am.

We've been together 11 years and married for 7. I still like him...although I don't always like everything about him! ;)

I have been with my husband for 12 years and married for 7 and he is still my bestest friend. I LOVE spending time with him and absolutely HATE when he isnt around. We talk on the phone all the time during the day and hang out as a family everynight and I wouldnt want it any other way

That can be a loaded question. :) My husband and I agree on a lot of very important issues. But we have very little in common with how we like to spend our personal time. It's been the same the whole 26 years and it's amazing how fast time is going by. May will be here before we know it when it'll be 27 years. It is what it is. We are what we are and we'll be together until one of us passes on.

Well, that is sad. I haven't seen that in most couples I know, but then again, I'm probably a bit younger than you, my husband and I, and most couples we know, have only been married a few years.
We know 2 couples that have been married 10 years or more. One of these couples seems very happy together. The other is more like what you have described. Both are childless, so that doesn't factor into it in their cases.
I've been married going on 4 years and for the first time, I am starting to really get irritated by my husband's quirks, stupid stuff like "Why doesn't he run the disposal more?!?!" Honestly it scares me a little, I do NOT want to end up like one of those couples you describe in ten years!!!!!
But he seems to still REALLY LIKE me, so that's a plus!!!!

24 yrs and not really so much!! lol

I like him, I love him, I want him, and I adore him even when we are very different and have our ups and downs..I cannot imagine my life without him. We have been married for 14 years (at 35).

I love my husband. I like my husband. I can't wait for our date in a couple weeks. I want to spend time with my husband. Married now 6 years and counting. Not everyday is sunshine and lollipops, but that is ok. Just makes us appreciate each other when we see how the other thinks (it can put a spin on our own thoughts), feels and no matter what, that we will be there tomorrow! I can't imagine anyone else in my life except him.

My husband is my best friend and I like him. Honest, there are things he does at times that I don't like, just like there are things he probably doesn't like about me. We've been married almost five years but we've been together for ten. We are two different people so of course we disagree and argue but we don't let our issues linger. We truly enjoy eachothers company and we do everything together along with our two little girls. We were both in very bad relationships before we met and feel very blessed to have found eachother, I think that really makes us appreciate eachother. I too feel very lucky and look at our couple friends wondering the same things you are. They've even asked us if we ever fight and I'm like of course we disagree we are human and no ones perfect but we don't sweat the small stuff, nothing for us has ever been a big enough deal to call it a fight. I love like him a lot.

I don't always like my husband and he doesn't always like me... I've known my husband for 19 years, been married 9 in February.

20 years of marriage and we like each other a lot!! We're best friends, affectionate and my daughter says we act like teenagers flirting. She thinks it's embarrassing but I'm sure in the long run she's glad since so many of her friends parents are divorced.

Oh yes I still like my husband! And we tell each other that too. Many years ago I told my husband I always love him, but I don't always like him (like when he leaves the wet towel on my side of the bed and I have to sleep on a damp spot!). To me the liking is just as important as the love, sometimes more so.

You have SO many answers-- but I will add, I do still LIKE my husband of 22 years, although we may snipe at each other (more so me than him). I have LOVED him the whole time, but have NOT liked him for maybe 5 years total at least! Just have to work thru the hard times IMO.

Hes my best friend....it started out that way,,,,,,stopped for awhile now its true again.

We like most of the same things. We like to go do the same stuff. We just dont have much to say to each other anymore.

I still like him even though once in awhile he gets on my nerves. We don't double date with anyone. Usually if get together with friends, its usually just me because his hobbies are more important. With my friends though, the men aren't always there. There are nights where he will be downstairs watching tv and i'll be in our room watcing tv. We've been married 11 years and I think things are way better now than in the past years.

I am grateful you posted this and I read every single answer.

Yes, I like him VERY much. But I know what you mean. Of course there are times when I can't stand him. Like when he is being stubborn and driving me nuts! We have been together 19 years and there seems to be a bit of a cycle of really meshing with each other well at times and later being in a low point and really having to work on our relationship. Right now I can honestly say I like him a lot...he is a great husband and a great friend to me. Hopefully you can find some new friends that both seem to enjoy each other - that would be so much more pleasant. Also, if you are hanging out with a girlfriend who just wants to complain about how much their hubby annoys them it kind of rubs off and you tend to complain back to her. It starts this pattern. Not that you should never complain. Anyway, our 2 best couple friends that we hang out with really are great together. We have another couple friend that sometimes seem to enjoy each other and sometimes the wife is totally annoyed with the husband. My mom and her boyfriend are like your friends. She is constantly nagging him and when he is not around she is bad mouthing him and saying how much she cannot stand him. It is really negative. Anyway, it sounds to me like you and your husband are in one of those spots in life where you need to work on being friends again.

12 years and I still like and love my husband. Infact I am more attracted to him than 14 years ago when we started dating.

I really do like my husband and also I have tremendous respect for him (although sometime i wish he would demonstrate that towards me more in particular in front of our son!). I think my husband is a very good person, to me, to our children, and especially to others, despite what he says he is!

some days more than others, lol. REally though I bet we come off that way to others. We have very few mutual friends, although he likes my friends and I like his, and neither of us are social people, so if we go out with "my" friends then he's quiet and acts all pissy, even though it's just him being uncomfortable and he's only even there to support me and spend time with me and let me have a good time with my friends. And the same goes if we go out with "his" friends.

But it's not that we dislike each other, or that we are unhappy or fighting that day.

He's just as much my best friend now as he was when we met! We've been married 16 years earlier this year. We met 20 years ago and been together (had our first kiss) 19 years.
We have always had so much in common and the things that we don't we don't mind in each other. We spend more of our time together doing things then apart.
We always hear how unusual we are, even from close friends, even those that are used to it by now. People are amazed at how much we enjoy in common.
When we met he was a customer where I worked, then he got a job there and we became friends somewhere in there which of course turned into more ;)
I see nothing ever changing as we are true to who we are and we like and love it all about each other.
Yes, we have our tiffs just like everyone else but they are nothing that we don't work out. I did change a few annoying habits he had like leaving every single kitchen cabinet door open when he was done in the kitchen or putting the toilet seat down when he's done. But we have cats and kids so they were easy to drill in LOL

I LOVE my man, and Like him.
He is my best friend. I miss him when he goes to work...it's silly really haha
We talk all the time, love all the time.
We kiss everyday , hug all the time.
We spend, pretty much, every night together.
Its great
I don't live in Cleveland but We live in Akron haha
Come hang out here!

Haven't read your answers yet, but good question. I've known my husband for almost 25 years (married almost 20). I can say with 100% certainty that yes I do still like him. I enjoy spending time with him. Of course I love a good gab session with my best friend once in a while, but I'm really happy to do anything with my husband. He's easy going, funny (very important to me), kind and honestly a fun person to be around. I thank God every day that my daughter is growing up with a father who she knows loves her and who she loves being around. After seeing/hearing some of the same types of things you talked about, I'd absolutely choose my husband again.

I adore my husband! Although we have only been married 4 years, we have been together 7 years and have known each other for about 20 years. I always look forward to Fridays. After I get off work, I go home and we enjoy each others company going ot the bank, CVS, Wal-Mart, Dollar Tree, our bank and finally we always do our grocery shopping togther. I would haave my Friday nights any other way. We share almost all activities together, however if he or I have something to do and the other doesn't wish to go along...great! sometimes we each need time to do other things! It works for both of us! At one time my husband said if he died tomorrow that would be fine, but as we have been growing older together, he says...I want as much time with you as I can have...ditto!

Yes I like my husband and love him very much. The more we both try and communicate and make time for eachother the better I feel about our relationship. He is my confidant and supporter and rock and I am his. Sometimes we drive eachother nuts but its what we do about those tense times and how we resolve them that counts. I try to picture my life without him and that thought makes me sad. I am blessed indeed.

Just saw this but wanted to throw my two cents in. I love, love my husband and I like,like my husband of seventeen years (and then some). And he is the hottest looking to me ever. Really. Your letter could be mine. And I also look at people who got married lately, like my neighbors and cannot even imagine what one earth they are married for. And they were like that before marriage-nasty to eachother, sarcastic and she swears a lot and he is like her little son. Oh well, whatever. I am happy because I know when I was married before I married for all the wrong reasons. And it was mainly the ones under my elbows. Wish we did live closer. I'd love to be with people who like eachother.

Wow! Good question! Since we can vent on here I have to say, NO, I do not like my husband. I have tried to analyze our relationship from both sides and we are both at fault but yet he blames me for everything that has ever gone wrong. And trust me, things have gone majorly wrong! Plus, he has gained a tremendous amount of weight which is a real turn-off! I think deep down I probably still love him because we have two beautiful children together but that's about where it stops. He is Mr. Perfect and takes no blame for anything nor will he even talk about stuff. He's the type that for 18 years is of the belief that if it's not talked about then the problem just goes away! Any time I try to talk to him he just goes into, "well, if you would do .... then everything would be fine." If I knew then what I know now I would have never gotten married. I'm finding out more and more he's just like his father and his mother has filed for divorce THREE times if that tells you anything!!! I was doing fine on my own! Awwww, if only we could turn back the clock!!!

From the outside it would probably seem we don't like eachother...but if you know both of us then you would know that we do like eachother.

We are alike in a lot of ways...but in many other ways we are very different. We have a lot of different opinions and we both do not keep them to ourselves. So what might seem like a dispute or "fight" or "nag"...it's not that way to us. We can be have a heated debate and one of us will throw in a joke of some sort and bam...we are cooled down and laughing with eachother.

It may appear as one thing and we don't mean for it to. We do still very much like eachother, and very much love eachother.

I don't always like him...but I don't always like my mother either. But I will always love them!

That's a good question. It's hard to judge other's relationships, you don't know their ins and outs.

Now I LOVE my husband...but sometimes i don't LIKE him. Or rather I guess I should say I don't like how he's acting, or making me feel, or what he's doing. Our relationship...like most has ebbs and tides. I always love him though, even in those few moments when I don't like him. He can still turn me to jelly in an instant with just a look a touch or a word :)

I have to say that right now, no, i do not like him at all. When you find out he slept with a vegas ho, you tend to not like them.

Love and like my hubby more 5 years after marriage than even when we were on that crazy falling in love ride :D We were really good friends when we met so I think that was so important, he is someone I would have wanted to hang out with regardless of if we were married or not. I often tell him I don't know what I would have done if I had married a couple other guys that I came close to tying the knot with! Now that I am married to him I know it would have been horrible with anyone else, I think he is the only one out there that could put up with me! So happy to hear you are in a great marriage :D

We've been together 9 years. We certainly have our moments, and in some rare moments, I don't like my husband.. nor he like me... but we keep the dating, respect, communication and romance alive. So yes, not only do we love each other, but we like each other too!

My parents liked each other too, for 25 years until my dad died of cancer, my inlaws have been together for 35 years now, my grandparents 60 years... they all like each other and still have fun and even that gleam in their eye when they look at each other. It is possible with work.

We don't go out with other couples. If we did, you would probally think we don't like each other at all.
We spend too much time together because we run the business together. We are not one of those couples who can be together all the time.

Love this article b/c so many marriages are in trouble! Have you ever heard of the i like book for couples - - yes - a way to appreciate & LIKE eachother in a very - back to the basics approach - check it out at www.theilikebook.com - it will revolutionize you marriage!

I can't stand mine. Married 9 years. He isn't the same man I married, but he is great with our kids. I have hope that he'll change back one day.