Do You....

No way man! I am jonesing for those Flowers every day of the week! Can't risk losing them. I mean, that's what it's all about, right? A popularity contest?

BAHAWAHA!!

As you know, occassionally a post will rub me the wrong way and a little sarcasm will creep into my answer. Sigh, but then I get a wicked case of Responder's Remorse.

:(

I try to be diplomatic. A blunt "mean" answer is not helpful. A direct answer given with consideration of the other's feelings has a chance of being helpful. One can give a direct and to the point answer and still be nice.

If a question rubs me the wrong way I'll be blunt and try not to sound mean but I probably do b/c I start getting PMs lol. Sometimes I need to learn to calm down and take a break for a few b/c some questions just are so off the wall that I can't really make myself believe people out there act like that, same with some responses.

I agree with Nina, if everyone is suggesting unkind treatment of a child or something I feel the need to respond to counter it b/c I feel children should be treated like human beings.

It's probably because you didn't give the poster the answer she 'wanted'. Some people really ask some stupid questions, and it is hard not to answer "seriously? you are breeding?".

Sometimes I just walk away from a question, because I know someone else will answer the question like I would. Then I give that person a flower, or an IM in certain circumstances.

If you don't want an honest answer, don't ask your question. I've felt stupid after some of my questions, but I'm not mean about it!

Honestly, so many questions pop up that I have to pass on commenting on because as my mother always said, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

I am just never sure how the receiver would take some of my blunt answers.

I don't really *try* to be nice. I just quickly type what I really think, as I think it! I also think it depends on the question asked. Like I just glaced at someone asking if you always wear your seat belt. I have not opened the question yet but just seeing the question is making me mad because I'm an insurance agent so it's a sore subject with me. So I just reply automatically what I think, like it or not. =)

I am a naturally blunt person. I delete a lot more than I post.

Sometimes, posters make me angry like the "I'm sick of this kitten" thread. If that's the case, I'm going in with guns-a-blazing. If I think you deserve a verbal slap, I'm going to give you one.

J.:

There are times when someone NEEDS to hear someone else's experience or opinion boldly.

I know I am called brash and assertive - probably a few other choice names as well - however, I won't say anything here that I wouldn't say to your face...so my motto is - don't ask the question if you don't want to know the answer...

Usually I try to find a way to soften my words, without taking away from the message. If I am going to be too blunt, I apologize in advance for it.

I answer. I try not to come across as a four letter word, but I will answer.

Depends on my mood and how much that person has irritated me in the past. I'm usually diplomatic but I've been known to let someone have it.

i say what i think....and sometimes it cant be nice. Most of the time i try to say it as nicely as possible but i keep in mind the attitude of the question as well.

Sometimes i see things that are obviously jokes and people who bash them for it. I try to read between the lines.

I think there is a nice way to say most anything :)

I really only remember being annoyed by a question once and the question was just posted today.
I am choosing to ignore it and actually said a prayer for the mom that she should just simply be grateful for what she has. I can in no way relate to her post although I do think she is entitled to her feelings. Frankly though I would have been embarrassed to have those feelings and I certainly would not share them on a public forum if I had them.
I think I am a glass is half full kind of person and this mom is perhaps a glass is half empty kind of person:)

In these situations I generally try to word my response with enough tact to be readable, but enough directness to sting a little afterward. The Velvet Hammer approach ;)

I don't think that being mean is the "right thing to do" but at the same time when moms post questions that are really off-the-wall or self-serving, then no need to sugar-coat it!

I would assume if someone is asking a question (however silly it "might" seem) it's because they want actual answers. Not just validation.
I say what I feel.
Sometimes tone is really misinterpreted in the written word.
I am honest and answer honestly.
I am sometimes shocked by the silly questions that people sometimes ask. I am also shocked by the cavalier attitude toward marriage, divorce and obvious pleasing of self with little consideration to children.
Sometimes just the question asked speaks volumes about the asker: good or bad, don't you think?

I try and be nice, but every now and then a question catches me wrong or I'm having a bad day or the question shows behavior that lacks common sense or purposeful stupidity. I'm very tollerent of the ignorant, just not of those that are proud of it.

If I'm having a really bad day, I stay off mam-pedia because then I'm all honesty and no sugar. AND, Like Mary Poppins sang, "a little bit of sugar makes the medicine go down in a most delightful way."

Good luck to you and yours.

I try to be loving. It's so hard to tell exactly what's going on just from one question. You don't know the person at all.

It may not always sound like it, but I do always try to be as nice as I can with very few exceptions. When someone is acting all holier than thou, or when they're clearly just wanting to be told they're right when they absolutely are not, then I'll either answer it honestly or not answer it at all. I don't think we do people any favors by sugar coating everything, that's not how the real world works.

I think you can be blunt without being mean. And if I have to be blunt, I preface my answer with "I'm going to be blunt" so the person isn't surprised with a non-warm/fuzzy answer. I hate mean answers - when people are hurtful or insulting. It's just not necessary.

HA. I do all of the above.

I used to teach adults (you would think it was easy, but kids probably would have listened better). I've learned that no matter what the question is, and I heard some mind blowing questions, you can almost always handle it tactfully. Say what you want (opinion, advice, etc) and be honest but you can say it in a way thats clear, to the point but not intentionally mean or berating. It's harder when it's through a computer then in person though.
So I answer honestly, based on experience or opion (depending on the q) and try to be tactful.
Now if you were my best friend, I would be extremely blunt, and depending on what the situation is, use a few choice words...but that's just how we are with each other. =)

All right.....what'd I miss?!? ;)

I don't believe that any of us has a right to judge anyone else. We all come from a variety of backgrounds and circumstances that sometimes we can not possibly even begin to understand. It is absolutely impossible to understand where a person is coming from unless you walk in their shoes. For instance, I have been on this site for quite awhile, and I have seen more than a few questions asking for help with domestic violence issues. There are ALWAYS people who think it is OK to judge these women, to question their intelligence, and even to berate them for staying in this type of situation, when they have absolutely no clue what it is like to live it, or how terrifying it is to try and escape it. What they don't realize is that these responses don't help even one tiny bit. They can and probably do make these women feel even worse about themselves, instead of giving them the help they need, they just get their feelings of inadequacy and worthlessness reinforced. This is just one of the examples I can give. So to answer your question, no if I don't believe that I can be nice, I don't say anything at all. IMO being mean is never the right thing to do, and it could make things much worse. -

For the most part, if I have nothing nice to say , I pass on answering the question. Most of the time, someone is going think and respond how I would have anyway and then I give them a flower. I admit there have been a couple posts that have struck a nerve and I have replied somewhat harshly and later regretted it.