Tomorrow it is likely that we'll have to say good-bye to the family dog. She's been treated for this condition several times before, but it just keeps getting worse. She's swollen and miserable. Our older son will grieve heavily, but he'll understand. He's seen her suffering. However, our 3-year old just lost a grandparent last year. What do you think is the best way to explain this to him? I'm afraid if we say, "The doctor kept her." He'll be afraid of the doctor. Or, if we tell him she was too ill to save, will he understand?
Tell her that she was very sick, and the vet couldn't save her.
She may not completely understand, and may ask again about the dog. Tell her the sme thing. As she gets older, she will understand more.
I am very sorry because pets are family to us.
I'm in the camp with being honest with your child. We've been through it 2 times and we are facing it again most likely within the next year. Our dogs who have passed were 13 and 14 respectively and we currently have a 13 yr old dog. Daughter was 5 when we lost the first one.
I bought the book "All Dogs Go to Heaven". It helped. When our second dog passed away, we were given a book "Cicken Soup for the Pet Lover's Soul" which was very nice.
I would be honest and simple with your answers to your child. Again, I am sorry you are going through this.. it is very hard.
We lost one of our dogs when my oldest was 3. We kept it very simple- We have to tell you something very sad, Thor died. We will miss him very much, but we can always remember him and keep him in our hearts. It will take a while to sink in. My son asked for months when Thor would be all better, when he was coming home. We just stayed consistent- Thor is not coming back, he died. We remember him by looking at his picture and keeping him in our hearts.
Hit the library for some resources to help. Do tell him the truth. The dog is with grandma now.
Definitely tell him the truth, though as the other posters have said, keep it simple and follow your child's lead. He'll ask you questions, if he's concerned about it ... possibly for a long time after the event. My kids lost a great-grandparent and two pets when my oldest son was between the ages of 2-4. At first, we just said that he (the grandpa) passed away and we weren't going to see him any more. Over months and following the loss of our pets, my son continued to ask questions, so we fleshed out our answers a bit, and talked about the fact that they were very old and very sick, and about heaven, etc. My son (3 at the time) had very detailed questions, like "are your eyes closed when you die" and questions about heaven ... I just reflected those questions back to him as much as possible (e.g "usually your eyes are closed. why do you ask?" "I want my eyes to be open" "I think that's ok"). For a while, I let him retain comforting misconceptions that he developed on his own (like, *only* very old and sick people die) but as he has gotten a little older (he's now 5) those misconceptions are dropping away naturally, and he seems fine about it. Best wishes.
I think you should explain what really happened. He will need to understand the concept eventually. Make him fell comforted. It's hard for kids to lose pets.
I would explain that the dog was sick and would not get better. Let him know that medicine didn't help anymore and she is going to live with the grandparent that passed last year. Then to help comfort, give him a copy of "The Rainbow Bridge". It really helps children cope with the loss of a pet. Heck, it helps most adults, too.
My sympathies to all of you, I know pets are important parts of the family.
I would let the child go and say goodbye explaining the cycle of life.
Maybe better to head off into it naturally as it happens than pretending it doesn't happen.
My mom took me to several funerals w/her when I was young. I am forever grateful as I am able to say goodbye, attend funerals etc as an adult.
I am so sorry for the loss of your dog by the way.
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I would let the child go and say goodbye explaining the cycle of life.
Maybe better to head off into it naturally as it happens than pretending it doesn't happen.
My mom took me to several funerals w/her when I was young. I am forever grateful as I am able to say goodbye, attend funerals etc as an adult.
I am so sorry for the loss of your dog by the way.
