Control Curly Hair

Hi Joyce, hi daughter!
Try the products from Carol's Daughter. I think you will find them quite effective and totally safe.
K., mother of three (grown ) daughters and one beautiful grand-daughter who uses these products

One thing that helps - get her a satin pillowcase when she sleeps - it helps prevent tangles and she'll feel like a princess!

Hi J.,

I know exactly how you feel, My youngest daughter has extremely curly hair as well. I had tried everything too, until a lady suggested something I thought was crazy, but I tried it, and it actually works great! Bare with me, after her hair has been washed, put 1/2 cup of regular mayonnaise in her hair, and let it sit for 10 minutes. Then just rinse it out and put a little regular conditioner in (to get rid or the smell)I know I thought it was nuts myself, but it works for my "curly Sue" It's something to do with the cholesterol in mayonnaise that tames hair. Good luck to ya.

Hi J.,

Had you thought about keeping her hair short and using a pick comb to untangled the curls?

Good luck. D.

J. Cat Walk makes a great line of products for curly hair, shampoo,cond, moist., amplfiers and many more. The salon I work in carries it and we also use it on our customers and we love it.Also try to keep it long the shorter the hair the more curl you will have. Good Luck B.

A little about me : married for 8 years, 2 wonderful little girls 3 & 5, Full time Hairstylist,part time lia sophia advisor

Check out www.curls.biz I love thier products. A bit pricey but well worth it to me. They also have a curl chart so you can see what type curl your daughter has and get the product that best matches her hair. Hope it helps!

Take care
Mimi

that is so me when i was little....my mom would make a big braid....or two little braided pigtails either down under my ears twards the front of the shoulders,,,and then on the back of the neck closer together....hope that helps.

Hi J.!
I feel for your daughter. When I was younger my mom used to give me perms because my hair was so straight. As I hit my teens, it was a little wavey & when the years of the poodle hair came I got perms to make it curly. Then I stopped & I had really nice hair until I got pregnant. I now have a 20 year perm!! My hair got so curly it's like a perm without the perm (plus it's really thick). I get tons of compliments on the curls & I kind of growl & think yeah watch when I comb it. When I wash my hair I dry the top I have it cut in layers & the back I just let dry. I do use good conditioner & gel but it doesn't seem to matter. At the end of the day when I comb my hair before bed, it gets huge. My best advice to you for your daughter is keep doing what you're doing, let it dry naturally if you can. Just be careful with the products that you use, because she's so young you don't want to damage her hair. Oh, & the straightening thing - I bought a flat iron about a year ago, it takes forever I think I've used it 4 times (it was really worth the $40)!
Who knows, in a few years her hair might change.
Good luck!

Celebrate your daughter's curls!!! I went through most of my youth trying to straighten and relax my curls and hating my hair, before realizing what everyone else in the world now tells me...my curls are beautiful. Don't make your daughter feel that she needs to change anything about the way she looks.
Having said that, you're on the right track with leave in conditioners. LOSE THE MOUSSE! Mousse is a volumizer, the last thing curly heads need. Switch to creams or gels. Also good is a laminator that you spray onto the hair after washing and conditioning before combing it out.
Try using products formulated specifically for curly hair. Suave makes a great knock-off of Redkin's curly hair products and Garnier Fructise has a line called Curl and Shine that I like very much. If you're willing to spend more money, there are children's products for curly hair, such as Fuzzy Duck, that work well. Check out the website naturallycurly.com for all sorts of advise and product recommentations.

Try OUIDAD. You can find it at OUIDAD.com. The only problem is there are limited salons that sell the stuff but it is great. ALl their products are safe even for color treated hair (which she doesn't have) . But one thing about really curly hair is the less the better. the less brushing, washing, etc. frizz develops. I tried these products after trying a zillion other things over my lifetime, and they are far superior than anything and worth the cost. They do have a kidsline, which I have evewn used on accassion.

The website will show you if there are any salons in your area, if there are they sell it. I have to buy it and have it shipped. I don't work for ouidad or have stock in the product. I love this stuff. Curls are GREAT! (this coming rom someone who used to iron her hair in highschool).

Good luck and never use a brush....very wide tooth comb.
cab

I was a hairdresser for many years in DC, and my advice would be to let curly hair be curly, especially on a 3 year old. If her hair is tight curly, all the way to the root, I'd probably do one of two things on the cut...either cut it evenly around the head at 4-5 inches, so that it doesn't get too tangly or, if you're partial to leaving it longer, try to keep it in pony or pig tails. The longer the hair, the bigger it's going to get.
For holding back hair on little ones, the little silicone rubber bands that they sell in the drug store, nomally used to braid African American hair work great on all hair types. They come in clear, so you can't see them on any hair color, and you can add any bow or clip over top of it. Both should stay in all day long, plus removal is easy and easier on the hair.
It sounds like you're trying the right products. Just try to avoid products with silicone derivatives...any thing listed in the first four ingredients ending in "-cone". These tend to build up on the hair and dry it out. Nothing that I know of is good for removing it from the hair.
Another trick for a little one is to get a good natural bristle paddle brush. It's okay if it has some nylon reinforcement, but no balls on the end of the nylon, because that rips the hair out.
Air drying, not blow drying is probably best for you little one. Less work for you anyway.
I hope this helps.
-K.

Try not to straighten her hair. she will learn to embrace her curls from you- so please try to embrace them as one of her beautiful birthmarks.
I have success with after you wash hair, use a product called biosilk. It is kind of expensive but you use such a little amount, it lasts for months and months.
It also smells nice and is safe. Use a quarter sized dollop on your hands, and rub together well. rub UNDER her wet hair first so you don't make her hair look oily, and then go over the top and through her hair. Use a WIDE toothed come or even a pick. (NEVER A BRUSH< IT WILL FRIZZ HER HAIR)
You can come it out and let it go, with the biosilk - or comb it through and then twirl the top layers of curls around your hair to get them to "cooperate". Good luck- and embrace them! Girls have enough to worry about without feeling like they need to fix something. GIRL POWER!

Hi J.,

I too, have very curly hair and during a time, 60's-70's when there was nothing to tame it. The websites listed are fabulous sources. Be sure you stay away from any products containing sulfates of any kind. They are harsh on the hair and will leave it dry and brittle, regardless of what the bottle claims. Most children's shampoos do not contain any sulfates, usually found in adult shampoos. Haven't figured out why if kids don't need that kind of stuff, why do adults...another subject.

Be sure you handle her hair as little as possible while it's drying, either naturally or with an ionic hair dryer. Those kind push the water back into the hair, takes longer to dry but the difference is worth the effort. Scrunch her curls as they dry to encourage the curls to tighten. The lower the humidity the higher the chance her curls will frizz, curls love high humidity and damp weather. Experiment with products until you find the one you like. Burt's Bees has some great kids products that are natural and gentle for their soft hair. Enjoy her curls! ;-)

J.! What a bundle of J. your daughter must be! Celebrate her and everything about her, including her magnificent curls! In this society, where we are constantly bombarded with messages that we need to change the way we look, all children need to know that they are special just the way God made them. She is just now beginning to build her self esteem - don't tame it. The suggestions you have from others are great in regard to how best to handle her hair. NEVER put any chemical relaxer on a child's hair! I especially love the suggestion of cutting it to about 4-5 inches. How CUTE is that!?! She'll have the most adorable curly top EVER! MOST important is to be PATIENT and never make her feel bad about her hair. Best Wishes ~ K.

I think you should use less ingedients and definitely no heat. This may sound outrages for the issues you are having but she is just a baby and less is truly more. Try using virgin olive oil in which organics has it just for children. Keep it braided as much as possible (braids or plaits are good). It may take a little time to braid it up but it will be done for the week. After washing be sure to oil and brush it really good and rebraid it. Once it starts to grow out during this process you should notice the difference in it growing straight rather then curly. PLEASE hold off as long as possible before putting any type of chemicals in your childs hair. Once you start there is no turning back. Time and Love will truly do the trick.

Check out the book Curly Girl by Loraine Massey. This book has a lot of great advice for controlling different kinds of curly hair. I am part owner of Ocean View HairColor Studio and have used this book as a reference for all of my curly haired clients with great success. The main thing is to not shampoo too often and to use sulfate free shampoos when you do. Curly hair needs moisture and the soap in shampoos strips the moisture from the hair. You are on the right path with the leave-ins and try not to straighten her hair if you can help it. This will only dry it out more. Embrace her curls and love them for the beautiful thing they are.

My name is H. and if you have any questions you can reach me at Ocean View HairColor Studio ###-###-####. Also, check out www.naturallycurly.com for more great tips and recommendations.

I feel your frustration. I alo thought I'd been through every product there is out there. The money spent on products that don't help reallt adds up. Along with the daily drama of combing out the hair.
Then I tried...."Matrix BIOLACE Detangling Solution"
I've found it at Giant Food Store and at the local Hair Salons. It's not cheap, but a little goes a long way.
For us, we've had to develope our own way to use the product.
First hair and scalp needs to be clean. My daughter is 10 and in her rushing to get out of the bathroom (wanting to get to the movie we are going to watch) she will only "rinse" her hair...NOT has to be clean. We still use JJ Hair and Body Wash.
Then hair should be only towel dry. Should be still fairly wet. She has the thinnest of hair, but it's length is down to the top of her pants. Hair is VERY FINE.-I'm a thick haired red-head...howed this happen???? ha
Anyway.....For her hair...I put about a quarters amount on my hand, rub hands together and then pull hands through hair. Be sure to get under neck, over top of ears, and the ends. Then...this seems to make all the difference....a spray bottle on the finest mist. Mist the hair once all over. Run hands down hair one more time...only once. Now the hair is fairly wet and has the product in it. Put a towel down behind her back and start combing. When you comb...start at the bottom!! And only use a comb, (we don't own a brush) Only comb and only comb wet hair!!! Start at the bottom and comb out the bottom inch, now move up an inch and comb out the two inches to the bottom....up another inch. While you are combing you will be combing out water and some of the product, tap the comb on the towel to keep it cleaned off. In our case...if she's had a busy day and it's a real rats nest-ha...sometimes one side will dry before I can get to it so we have to mist again to make it really damp almost wet and keep combing.
Another way to use this product is to put two tablespoons into an 8oz spray bottle. When you first mix it use warm water so it will mis and then give it a swirl each time you use it.
We tried washing in the shower and then putting in the product and then a quick rince in the shower. It didn't work a well. It seems for us it works better with the misting.
In 10 years I have never "brushed" my daughters hair. People normally brush dry hair and that only makes things much worse. So much breaking and hair isn't flexiable when it's dry. I understand there are times when you want to do a quick touch up on the kids right before going out the door without having a wet head kid. We just plann around this and at times have wet her hair and done a touch up.
Now for those that want to blast me for still combing out my 10 year olds hair, get over it. It's a bedtime ritual we have done every night since she was born. It give us more time in the mornings, as we braid it or do whatever the night before. Mostly it's about a winding down and time together before bedtime thing.
I hope this helps!!
Happy combing!
S.

J.,
Check out this website. These products may work for your daughter as well. The products were created by an African American woman, but if you look at the website you can see how curly her hair is. Hope it works!

http://www.janecartersolution.com/home.html

My daughter, now 11, has the same (what I call corkscrew) curls. It was tough when she was younger because she really just didn't want to be messed with, and there were a lot of tears at shampoo time. It got to the point that when people would say "you have such pretty curly hair" she would respond by saying " My hair is NOT curly!" My advice: first - DO NOT straighten it. She was blessed with something special;reinforce how lucky she is to have it! Now my daughter loves her hair! You don't want to send the message that there is something wrong with her because she has curls. Use a very WIDE tooth comb, and start at the bottom, working your way up. Never, ever use a brush of any kind. Curly hair is very fragile and breaks easily. No mousse - it's really drying. Go to a good salon, and buy a professional product for detangling/conditioning. The stuff I bought at the grocery store was never sufficient; salon products worked and made her hair shinier, too. And finally - frequent trims are REALLY important. Curly hair breaks, which causes more tangling...and oh yeah - no bangs on little girls with curls - they look silly! Best wishes to you!

I have the same problem. What works best for me is to put my hair in a tight bun (thanks to military regs) and leave it wet while its up in the bun then take it down after about 4 hours straighten it and its usually good for 2-3 days as long as she doesn't get her hair wet. Try Sunsilk in the green bottle is what I use and it works out so much better for me.

Best of Luck!

I am African-American & my daughter is mixed w/Caucasian. This is what we do with her very lovely naturally spiral curly hair: Shampoo. Conditioner (very important). Comb & detangle in the shower before rinsing conditioner (less breakage). Towel dry. Leave-in conditioner (we use Infusium).
Here is where you need to make a judgment call depending on her hair. I've tried many things & switched often depending on how products work/time of year, etc.
We use a moisturizing treatment (leave-in) such as Hawaiian Silky (can find @ Sally's), Optimum Oil Therapy Creme Oil Moisturizer, Fructis Leave-in Conditioning Cream, African Royale Mink Oil Gel, or Sunsilk cream. Not all are used at the same time. We've tried all of these and they worked for us... like I said, depending on the time of year, humidity factors, etc.
Then, spray lightly with hair spray (we use Fructis). This defeats most of her frizz if she is wearing her hair loose. If she leaves her hair alone, it looks good all day, or at least most of it. If she plays with her hair, it'll frizz by mid-afternoon no matter what we do to it in the morning.
We skip the hairspray if we're doing braids.

I prefer to use nexus leave in condtioner and keep their hair braided. Fewer tangles that way.

Check out http://www.naturallycurly.com. There is boatloads of information here.

Definitely lose the mousse. The alchohol in it isn't helping anything. Along with the other brands mentioned, try SunSilks 24/7 Leave In Creme in the green bottle. It tames my curls and leaves them very manageable. Also, brushes have a tendency to frazzle curly hair. A wide tooth comb or pik will work better to detangle, especially on wet hair.

My daughter and I have very curly hair as well. I'm biracial (black & white) and her father is black. For the both of us I use Nexus Therape shampoo and Humectress conditioner. A bit expensive, but our hair is worth it. After we wash and condition (1 - 2 x per week max) I gently dry it w/ a towel and spray a leave on conditioner on it. Then I apply Miss Jessies Baby Buttercreme. I like it b/c it is moisturizing for us both w/o leaving a greasy feeling. Its almost as if our curls slurp it in and hold onto it.

Each day I brush out our hair and then spray it w/ water to help the curls reform. If it feels dry, I use a little more buttercreme. If not, I put hers in pony tails and braid it. At this age (2) she doesn't need to wear her hair down and its too traumatic the next day to brush it out. You want to be very gentle w/ brushing out the kinks. She's getting her ends trimmed next week for the first time b/c they are VERY dry and brittle. It will go a long way in making it easier to brush out her hair.

I also like to cornrow her hair and leave it for the week. Makes the mornings easier!

Here are a few websites to check out: www.naturallycurly.com
www.mixedchicks.net
www.missjessies.com
www.carolsdaughter.com

Also, know up front that finding the right products for your daughter's hair will be trial and error. Be prepared to buy a product only to find out that it isn't really right. Unfortunately that's the thing all curly heads go through.

I have very curly hair which has gotten a lot more manageable over the years but my daughter's hair sounds like your daughter's. I use Nexxus Humectress (just to moisturize) and Vitapointe (can get in the drugstore). If I let my daughter wear her hair out, which is rare these days because it gets so tangled, I will put in like 6 braids close to her scalp (almost like a cornrow) the night before right after her bath while it is wet and take the braids out in the morning. Sometimes this makes the curl more wavy than curly and a little more manageable. I will also pull it back in ponytail and put 3 or 4 scrunchies around the ponytail to help flatten it a little bit. My daughter wear ponytails a lot- it is just easier. I will also use a hairdressing, like tcb, if the top gets frizzy when it is in ponytails. Good luck. Just remember, it will get easier once she is older.

L. S

When you wash her hair, comb it out then. Don't wait until it is dry. Then maybe try some mousse or some gel to keep it from getting frizzy. Find a stylist who knows how to cut naturally curly hair, even this young. Try www.naturallycurly.com.
I found my stylist there. I have curly hair, and my son is the only one who inherited my curls. But, we keep his hair really short. Good luck! And embrace the curls!

hi! I too have curly hair. First thing is if you are leaving it curly let it air dry, and put a leave in creme conditioner in it after it is dry, use only a wide toothed comb. If you are straighting it with a flat iron put blow serum in it while only towel dry, then blow it dry while brushing it straight, flat iron it, and then put citre shine in it. (it is that last step that really makes the difference). good luck. my hair was much more manageable long, short was way too curly, and long the weight of the hair helped some too.

Hi J.,
My hair is very curly. Your best bet it to comb it only when it is wet with conditioner. Then you can rinse and braid it or pony tail or some other for of restrained hair do. If not you should not attempt to comb and never a brush until it is wet with conditioner again. Only use wide tooth combs.

Hi J. C: My neice has very, very curly thick long hair. It is beautiful and I and her mom had a difficult time finding hair products that worked well on her hair. My neice is of mixed background and we have found much success with the product line Carol's Daughter. We purchase the products at a beauty store called Sephora. I hope this is helpful.

About me: I am a career mom with a son who is 4 years old and I have been married for over 5 years.

There are hair dressers that specialize in Curly Hair. I know About Faces in Kenilworth has one that my cousin uses. The number is ###-###-####. I am not sure of the hairdressers name, but I am sure the front desk can help you. They will also give you a consultation and let you know the best products to use and how to care for her hair. They are a bit pricey but well worth the expertise! Good Luck!

My four-year old daughter, too, has very curly hair. I use Johnson's conditioning shampoo, which makes it soft; plus, it smells great! While I don't try to straighten it, I do struggle to keep it frizz-free and looking decent. Since she usually bathes at night, I put her hair up before she goes to bed. Otherwise, it's a tangled mess in the morning. In the mornings, I spray Johnsons detangling into her hair, comb it with a wide-toothed comb first to get the knots out, and then comb it with a narrow-toothed comb. Once it's detangled, I either pull it back into a ponytail, bun, or pigtails. Once she gets older and can self-manage her hair, she can wear it down. For now, though, it's just easier to keep it up! Hope this helps. Good luck!

The best thing to do is just enjoy the curls :) conditioners are great but I found just a little spray bottle of water does the trick. Let the hair air dry if you can and after about 15 minutes or so spray a light mist of water on the curls, lightly scrunch them in your hands and that's it! They will curl right up beautifully and if they get a little frizzy just a light spritz of water should calm them down and get them to a nice curl. My mom use to curl my hair when it was wet around her finger and put bobby-pins in each one let my hair dry and they were long "banana curls" as they use to call them. Could be another idea but that takes time... which we all don't have a ton of ... hopefully this helps -enjoy

Hi, I always found that pure, organic, unrefined coconut oil helps with about anything from dry skin, damaged hair, and if digested they say it's great for your whole body. Hope this helps.

Angela

I agree. My dd has curly hair and a very sensative scalp. I can only comb/brush her hair while she is asleep. The Ouchless brand combs and brushes are all she will tolerate. Ouchless makes hair assessories as well that do not pull fine, curly hair so badly, if you are interested in putting her hair up.