Consequence for Behavior

Consequence: Earlier bed time that night.

Ideas for helping him avoid consequences:
Create a new routine, walk thru it with him for a couple days.
Help him lay out his clothes the night before.
Get him a neat alarm clock that has a "sunrise" light included and sound. (this time change has us all a little off)
Reward him with a special b'fast treat if he makes it to the kitchen, ready, on-time.
Explain to him how it affects the rest of the family, maybe he doesn't understand how he fits in to the morning routine, so it's not a priority.

Are you normally up a while before he is? Maybe you just need to start waking him up earlier and giving him more time in the morning. Our son ( who is a grown man now) was always a "slow starter" in the morning, he would get up out of bed and stumble into the living room and basically sit on the sofa in a trance for about 15 minutes before he managed to wake up enough to function. Some of us are morning people and some of us aren't, and no amount of fussing is going to change that basic fact.
That being said, he has to learn to be punctual and you need to find a way to keep your mornings from being a constant battle. Do you have his clothes all picked out and ready to go in the evening before he goes to bed? Is his bookbag,coat etc all sitting in one spot by the door, waiting for him to head out to school? I think I would start "getting him ready" at night, by discussing everything that is going to need to be done in the morning, and encouraging him to be up and ready to go on time. Ask him how long HE thinks he needs to have to be ready to leave at the appointed time. If he is late the next morning then get him up 15 minutes earlier the next morning ...OR...have him go to bed 15 - 30 minutes EARLIER as consequences for being late. ( You must need extra sleep honey so this is what we are going to do!!!).
I like the positive reinforcement idea of rewarding him with something special on the weekend if he hasn't been late going out the door all week long. It wouldnt have to be something material, it could just be something that you would do together as a family, a trip to the zoo, a walk in the park, a visit to the library...give him several things to choose from. When he IS ready to go on time really heap the praise on thick...make him feel like he just won the Nobel Prize!!!!
If all else fails, I have heard of other parents simply taking their child to school in their pajamas!!! I would think one day of sitting in class with his little fuzzy green frog jammies would be enough to convince him to NEVER EVER be late again...lol.
Good luck!!
R. Ann

i know it's a big age difference, but with my 3 year old, we literally wrote down the things he had to do in order to get ready - in our case: brush teeth, go potty, get dressed, and feed the fish. there's no playing, no tv, and no nothing fun at all (except a few minutes of cuddles to allow him to wake up) until it's done. we went through a rough patch when i first started this routine, and i was half an hour late to work one morning because i literally had to put him in time out about fifteen times. but after a few mornings, he got with the program, and now mornings are practically seamless, and a lot less stress. i would also suggest getting him up earlier to allow him to "work his way around" to doing what he's supposed to. the more time he has, the more likely he'll decide to do it on his own, which is the easiest way. (i have to be honest and admit that after awhile, for this particular situation, timeouts didn't work for my son, because he would pee on the floor while in timeout, just to spite me...so we did use a swat on the bum a few times then. i don't feel this is something i am willing to give in on...punctuality is very important to me and i really feel that it is an important stepping stone towards becoming a responsible adult.) good luck, hope any of this helps!

I have lived this with a cousin who I walked to school with and made me late everyday, with my own daughter and some other family members. It is just some personalities I guess that either don't care, or do it to be in control, or I don't have the answer. I made my daughter late to school and it didn't faze her and this was in high school. So now a granddaughter is doing the same thing. I suggested to her mother that they get a timer, set it and when it goes off she is to move to the next thing to do to be ready. I guess if that didn't work you would have to be much more harsh but from my experience nothing works until the person learns to care about others being on time or meals waiting getting cold, etc. I just suggest you try to break it NOW as it will go on and on and on.

Wake him up earlier.... good luck

Is there some reason he doesn't want to go to school, or does this happen whenever he has to get up early? An 8 year old needs about 10 1/2 hours of sleep a night. So if he's getting enough sleep, there has to be another reason. Is he a good student? Does he struggle in school? I work with dyslexic children, and age 8 is for many of them is a pivotal time...when they begin to really start to struggle in school. The average dyslexic student is diagnosed at age 9. And of course attention problems could create the same kind of reaction--school avoidance. Most dyslexic students will hit a wall, so to speak, at about age 8... when their ability to memorize words fails them due to the fact that multi-syllabic words must be sounded out (not memorized), in order to pronounce/decode/read them. Just a thought.

I have tried this: I say something like "I'm going to come back in 5 minutes and you surprise me by being all dressed!" Or, "Let's see if you can get dressed (brush teeth/hair - whatever) by the time I count to 20. On your mark, get set, go." Or, set a timer and see if he can do whatever before the timer rings.

"Love and Logic" - let him experience the natural consequences for being late. If he isn't ready to go when you are, he leaves in the state he's in. For example, if he hasn't eaten breakfast yet, too bad, when it's time to go, it's time to go. The book explains it better. Good luck!

What you need to do is keep getting up earlier. If he doesn't want to get up earlier, then he'll learn to get ready faster. Every time you are late, get up 15 minutes earlier. Hopefully, he's a child that likes his sleep. If that doesn't work, then you could make him go to school hungry by making him get dressed and be ready before anything else happens.

Is there something you take him to? A lesson? A club? Make HIM late. Make him understand how it feels.

Suzi

I like the chart idea, sometimes having it all written out in black in white helps, my son is almost 14 and I swear he has ADD, if I didn't stay after him he would never get out the door on time. If your son is still young enough the push is for positive reinforcement, you can encourage him that if he gets a week straight of no late mornings a special treat? I know he is probably a little too old for sticker charts or reward boards but if you keep a calander hung up you could easily mark the days. I hope you find something that motivates him, it is a life skill and will only get worse as he gets older. Lots of luck!
B.

Let him own his behavior. He may go to school in his pajamas, or without having brushed his teeth (kids will let him know his breath is yucky), or face his teacher without the papers he didn't have time to grab that morning. It usually takes about 1 (yes 1) time to nip this in the bud! Good luck and stand strong!

Hi M., I have girls so my ideas may not work as well. But I just told them - we are leaving the house at X time. If you go to school in PJs, hair not combed, no breakfast what ever it's their problem not mine. I felt bad at first, but it helped. No one has gone to school in their PJs yet, but both have gone without getting their hair fixed. Also, if it's with getting him out of the bed try putting him in bed an hour early. Just tell him that if he can't get up then he'll go to bed early. We got these ideas from a class that we took at church called Parenting on Purpose from Sheridan House Ministries. Check it out - it was such a help to us. Good Luck and God Bless!

I like everyones ideas, however I don't think I saw any consequences.
For our 8 yo son we take away his tv time.
We had the problem of he didn't want to take a shower when we told him to at night & he would start crying & throwing a fit. I took his tv time away the next day & we haven't had the problem since. Every child is different. You will need some trial & error to find what is the best motivation & consequences for him.

God bless!