Clingy Mama's Girl

she's TWO. she wants what she wants and yells for it if it doesn't happen. that's what two year olds do.
you're the ADULT.
take charge of the situation.
calmly, lovingly, firmly.
you're not 'upsetting' her. you're being the reasonable, logical, in charge adult. she will learn how to NOT be upset when she sees that life is BETTER when her parents are in charge and that she, this tiny toddler, doesn't have the immense responsibility of running things.
give this child a break.
stop expecting her to act like anything but a two year old.
she is too young to decide who takes her out of the car seat or pushes her stroller or play with her.
the grown-ups in her life need to act like adults.
khairete
S.

You said it when you said she's fine when you're not around. This isn't unusual, she's doing her job. Get out more and don't give into it when Dad is doing something. My kids have tried to do this sort of thing off & on but it doesn't last because neither myself nor my husband ever pay it any attention or give into it.

That's because she will outgrow it.
She's 2-1/2.
It's her "job" to want mommy. :)

I think as long as she does OK when you're not there, it's a phase.
Try getting out more in the evening....even for an hour here and there.

If she's okay when you're not there, then she's asserting her authority over you and you have to put a stop to it.

Have dad do some of the things for her and don't pay any attention to her yelling for mama. She does it because it works!

be around less :) sorry, that's the key. if you want them to stop demanding toys at the store, don't buy them things so they get out of the habit of expecting it. if you want them to stop bugging you about playing video games 24/7, video games go on hiatus. anything that is abused and taken for granted, imo, should be reigned in. of course you're not going to remove yourself from her life...but i would make a real effort to do things without her and force her to get used to others taking care of her. the more you do it, then when you ARE there and say "daddy can help you" then it will be easier for her. i'm really proud and impressed that you are reaching out here. it sounds like between both of your girls this is kind of a pattern. (one thing i forgot to mention in your other post, when my son was 3 and he pulled something similar, i found leaving the room to help a bit. if your older daughter is like your younger, perhaps just knowing you are at the swimming pool could be part of the problem?)

part of our job is to raise these kiddos to be self sufficient. we can love on them endlessly and that's what our hearts tell us to do, but it's not always in their best interests. she's only 2 1/2, BUT - i'd say a little work now, even if it's not fun, may avoid a situation in a few years like the one you're dealing with in your older daughter. just a thought. good luck mama!

Well, she will outgrow it but it took my daughter 4 years...no joke! ;) Seriously, my daughter was exactly the same. What we did was just sort of "force" her to deal with Daddy even if she didn't want to. She screamed too and most of the time it didn't stop right away but eventually she learned that screaming wouldn't make me come running. She didn't like it, but we did it. I pretty much put her to bed every night for 4.5 years (unless I wasn't home) until a few months ago when she asked out of no where to have my husband put her to bed! I literally did a little a dance! :)

Honestly, I believe that there is no easy way around this. You two will have to be strong and just not let her crying stop you. It will probably be harder on you seriously. Or you could leave the house more, that will help you. My daughter was mostly fine as long as I wasn't home.

It's the age. They want things the way they want them.

Give her something to care for like a baby doll. She can pretend to be the Mama and maybe you can play dolls with her to help her to become more independent. Also, give her some "big girls" chores to do. My daughter used to fold small towels from the laundry and help me wipe off the kitchen table when she was younger. You'll need to show her better than you can tell her. Also, schedule some time that she can spend just with her dad to give you a break, like she knows that on Tuesdays, she will spend 30 mins to an hour doing something fun together. Hope this helps.

Enjoy it now, one day she won't want you anymore!