Behavior Problems with Teenage Girl

I have a 12 and 14 year old girl. We have issues often. My best advice to you is to try to stay calm and be loving. As a 31 year old mother of tweens, I have not to easily forgotten what it was like to be a teen. It is so hard to believe anything that adults say because you just think you know everything. The calmer you can be when you communicate the easier it is for them not only to hear you, but also to believe you. Communication and prayer are the only things that I have seen real results with. Pray that God will give you the wisdom to nkow what to say, and that God will give her the desire to listen. The only other advice I could offer is try to encourage her to get involved in a youth group and surround her with kids her age that are making good choices. I have had my children there whole life and have invested a lot in there lives volunteering at church and school. They have friends that I have known since they were very young that respect me. Ther is nothing like positive peer pressure that says hey you should respect your mom. Hey you should listen to your mom. If she makes friends who will influence her in a positive way that is one less battle you will have to fight. I will be keeping you in my prayers.

Ok, so I have survived 2 teenage girls- the very best help I can offer is YokaReeder.com- she is so common sense- which honestly I didn't have- I was just doing what my mom had done- which I hadn't liked when I was a teen.
best, k

try this book, have a new kid by friday by dr kevin leman

It's a little difficult to give you ideas with so little information to go on. Can you give us some specifics about how she is acting out and what you have tried? That way we can give you better support.

However, I would wager a guess that some of what is going is typical teenage angst combined with perhaps some attachment issues. I'm not a professional, but I know attachment issues can come up in some adoptions of older children.

I would suggest counseling, both individual and family. Individual counseling both for her and for you and your partner and then family for all three of you and perhaps any other siblings, if there are any.

Good luck!

Another book to try, "Yes, Your Teen is Crazy", by Michael Bradley.

Good Luck!

If she has not been in counseling, get her and the entire family unit in. It happens SO much with adopted children because of the hormones they were exposed to while inutero. Usually that would have been stress hormones and cortisol. Then the break of the bond between mother and child. No matter what you gave her, how you loved her, and you would lay your life down for her.....all of that does not matter with so many adopted children. It's not your fault, it just happens. Good mental health counseling will do wonders. But remember that it has to do with attachment displacement and the feelings they have inside that are subconscious thought.

All 14 year olds act out to a certain extent. You do not really say how she is acting out so it is impossible to really try to give you any good advice.