Are We the Only Parents Saying No Cell Phone for Our 11 Year Old?

I generally don't like cell phones for kids but we bought the cheapest prepaid phone we could find for my oldest and only a few numbers in it and he only takes it to his dad's house because of things that were happening over there.

Maybe if what she really wants it for is game playing you could get her a hand held game device like a DSi or the like. My son is almost 7, he asked me for a cell phone and I said no, not until he is old enough to go out places (like the mall or movies) with friends without me. But he does have a DSi XL that he loves.

What about getting her an iPod touch? It's kind of a compromise. It looks like an iPhone (so other kids wouldn't necessarily know the difference) and you can still download all the games and music so she has something to do on the bus.

I think 11 is way too young for a cell phone- although I haven't reached that phase with my girls yet... maybe I'll have a different opinion when my kids are that age... but I hope not!

My 15 yr old had one by the 4th grade, HOWEVER, she is a responsible kid, mature for her age. Even the best of responsible kiddos lose/break phones. It is a monthly financial obligation as well. Daughrer's phone is a combo with mine.. 2 IPhones, the unlimited works and data plans and I spend $191/month. Of course she started with a simple phone and moved up.

I personally like it for safety reasons and I know I get slammed for that but you just have to do what is right for your family.

It sounds like your daughter is not responsible or mature enough to have a cell phone yet.

Good luck.

She does not seem responsible nor mature enough yet... to handle one... nor keep it from getting lost.

Don't 'fear' Christmas just because you may have to tell her no. Why? She is just a child. And parents say no. I tell my kids, per our budget... what we can or cannot get. It is not about 'disappointing' them.... it is about my kids "understanding" budget... responsibility... and being able to handle being told "No." That is life. They can't get everything they want and just because other kids have it.
My kids know that.

My daughter, when in 1st grade, had a classmate that had an iPhone... already. My daughter even said... "That is to much for a 7 year old... her parents must not be responsible..."

My daughter is 7 almost 8 now... and I have discussed cell phones... she knows, that when she is old enough AND responsible enough... she may have one... when she is much older. BUT... it is not a mandatory thing. It is not a "toy" but ONLY FOR USE FOR CALLING us, her Parents and for emergency. It is not a toy nor for entertainment.

To me, the premise of your deciding if you give your daughter a cell phone or not... is being based on the fact that MANY of the other kids have cell phones already... except your daughter. That is not a reason.

The REASON... should be, that she understand responsibility, can PROVE it... and only use it to call you or your Husband. That it is not a toy... or entertainment.

MEANWHILE, you properly research cell phones.. from what I understand, there are very basic cell phones for kids... that only allow them to call you... not all that texting and games on it nor online downloading of stuff allowed. Which also costs money. THEN, when your daughter is of the maturity and responsible behavior... you DISCUSS it with her... not it being a gratuitous "toy" you give her. You and your Husband discuss it with her, in a sit down meeting.. and clearly... delineate all your 'rules' for it...

all the best,
Susan

Nope. You're not. Our daughter thought she "needed" one too and we said no. When she entered 6th grade, nearly all of the kids in her class had one and we still said no.

During that year, there was all kinds of inappropriate texting going on, and basically, the kids were learning the boundries of their new "toys". We removed a whole level of bullying and snarkiness from her life that year. She heard about all of the drama, but thankfully, was not a part of it.

Now that she is in 7th grade, we are considering one. Most of the other kids in her class know their limits now and have settled in with their phones and use them appropriately. She is more involved with activities now, so it may be a good time to get one for her, but we will put together a contract with specific rules for use. We'll see how it goes...

Hope this helps and good luck!

If she and you do not need her to have a cell phone for any reason, then no, of course you are correct to not waste that money..

Stick to it. The only reason our daughter ended up with one in 6th grade, was because she was in middle school and had lots of activities and I had all types of different jobs going on at the same time.. We NEEDED to be able to keep in touch with each other..
Up until then there was no reason for her to have a cell phone.

When we did give her one, it did not include texting. It was jjst very basic.

Umm ... My impression of being a parent is to parent and make decisions for our children to help them become fine upstanding adults in this future world of ours ... let her learn what dissapointment feels like on the reciving end maybe she will be less likely to make you and others around her dissapointed as well. I am sorry but for me, 16 is the youngest to have a cell phone and that is only b/c around 16 many have car/work/school. And when my son is ready to have a cell phone he will be responsible for paying at least half of the bill monthly if not the whole thing. Maybe for the bus you can get her a Nintendo DS Lite so she is still busy on the bus but not with a cell phone.

Oh and this post may have more opinions too
http://www.mamapedia.com/questions/1047062179871850497

MY daughter is only 3 and a half, buti fully expect this age of "needing" a cell phone to be getting younger and younger - I may be dealing with your dilemma when she is only 8 or so.....so far, this is my thinking.

I am 33, cell phones weren't that prevalent when I was a kid, BUT I did have one from the time I had a driver's license, and it saved my butt numberous times, after car breakdowns, when running late, needing directions, etc. I do not intend to get her one till she is going places ALONE, with no adult supervision - which I would say will be about 16 or so. And even then, it will be for calling for a reason, not just chatting with friends/texting - if she uses it for that she will be paying the extra fees.

But Yeah, I think you are right , an 11 year old doesn't normally need a cell phone. I can think of a few extenuating circumstances where a "limited" cell of some kind, with only specific numbers/capabilities would be important - like for a latch-key kid that needs to be able to get ahold of parents in an emergency, or a city kid who rides the public bus ( not the school bus) to school, or has a really really long walk alone or something.

Also, as for "playing on the bus" - I had an over 1 hour bus ride from first grade through 5th, and never took a toy with me - school wasn't toy or playtime! She can read, get her some great books to read on the bus, and tell her to work on her homework on the way home, that way she doesn't have to waste ( as much ) afternoon playtime at home, on that.

As for Christmas, try to come up with something really grown up and special to do with you! Like a trip to the spa for facials or mani/pedis or something neat like that, go to a movie, go to a bookstore and pick out books together for her bus ride. Maybe make up a coupon book of special time with mom and or dad alone coupons to do different things, and things she can get/get out of too - no chore day, dinner of your choice, sleep in weekend, etc. I think that would be a great gift!

Good Luck!

Jessie

If you see no reason why your daughter needs a cell phone, then stick to your gut and do NOT get her one.

As for Christmas, it's only natural that you would want your child to be happy and get her what she wants. However, children need to learn they can't always have what they want. I'm sure you'll find another great gift. (Does she have an ipod or mp3 player, she might enjoy listening to music on the bus).

My girls rec'd cell phones when they started middle school. But I felt they needed phones for safety reasons. Our battle has been texting, especially my oldest. I see absolutely NO need for texting, so the answer is NO, and I'm sticking with it.

I say stick by your guns. I did not have a cell phone until I was 28 and still somehow managed to survive, lol. I see 8 year old kids with their phones and it's ridiculous. My nephew has one and it is just a distraction. My co-workers daughter had 3,000 text messages one month, how is that even possible. You know your daughter best and if she's not ready for it then wait. Tell her it is not an option and help her to come up with some other ideas for Christmas. I wanted a pony when I was 11, but didn't get one because it wasn't practical :)

Ok, my son will be 10 in a couple of weeks- he asked me for an Iphone- or any phone he said would do. Doesn't hurt for asking- but I remember many things I asked for as a child and never received- a magic 8 ball for example. My husband bought one for me after we were married though :)
Anyway, a cell phone is not necessary, required or usually a good idea for kids of any age. It irritates me that our youth in church text through the whole service. My son will get a cell phone when he can afford to get one- and since you have to be 18 to sign a contract for anything- That is probably when it will happen for him. Now, my brother on the other hand, is a single dad with 11 year old twins. they live in a small town and he works 50 miles away, he has gotten them a phone to share- so they can be in contact with each other through the day

You've already got lots of great answers here! My daughter had a phone at 11, and texting at 12. If you're not ready, and/or you don't think she is I highly recommend waiting. It becomes a slippery slope that's difficult to pull back from. The phone wasn't the issue for us, but texting was. She got so out of control (volume of texts) that we took texting away for a while - talk about a grumpy kid! She seems to have learned her lesson now, but if we had been a little more cautious in giving to her in the first place we may have been able to avoid some of the issues we had. We definitely gave her too much too soon. Now she has limits and has to pay for her texting plan which seems to be working. Good luck to you - go with your instincts!!

We didn't allow our son to have a cell phone until 7th grade which he entered this past Fall. He pestered us for 3 years before he finally got it. The only reason we finally agreed, he is getting more independent and it is useful for me to keep track of him and for him to call me when he needs a ride. He is, I am sure, the only kid that does not have text messaging!!! He asks for texting frequently, but he is happy to atleast have the phone. Someday, when he does get the text messaging option he will really appreciate it!

No. You are not alone. Our 12 year old son doesn't have one. He's been asking for over 2 years. He is not super responsible, but neither is he terribly irresponsible with expensive items. He just has no need of a cell phone. I drive the kids to school. I pick them up. I take them to extracurricular activities (where there is a phone that can be used to call me if necessary -- half the time I am sitting there at the activity anyway). He hardly used the telephone at home at all.

He just doesn't NEED one. We could add him to our plan for another $10/month plus taxes, fees, etc... but really... why? It's $10 bucks a month that aren't necessary to spend. In this economy, I am not wasting $$.

We gave him an Ipod last Xmas. NO, not the "touch" one. Again... he likes to listen to music, but was a touch screen really required?? NO. Was he disappointed... of course he would have preferred the touch, but he wasn't complaining about the one he got.

I think, if your daughter doesn't NEED it for safety reasons or convenience for YOU, then you shouldn't feel the least bit guilty for saying "no". Is she planning to pony up $15/month to cover the added expense for it?? It's not a one-time cost. It is MONTHLY. Kids don't always realize those sorts of details.

And because all her friends have one.... not a good enough reason. in fact, just the opposite in my opinion. If she is stuck, she can borrow one of theirs. :)

If you want to her be able to play games on the bus and she doesn't want to use or can't use or whatever her DS (nintendo handheld), then maybe look into an iPod with a screen. But I wouldn't get a phone just as a toy for her.

I did not give my daughter a cell phone for any gift. I got her one because she was in after school activities and came around from the back of the high school, the back door, to the parking lot by herself at 7:30 pm. She was a young freshman. The next day she had a phone on her for her safety.
My 12 year old wants one too, she is homeschooled and the only time she is away form me is when she is at church, so no cell hone. She also wants pierced ears, no on that one too. She knows 8th grade graduation.
We gave my 15 year old a computer for her birthday this year because she needed one for school and I was tired of giving mine up for homework.
What about an iPod or a Nintendo DS? My 12 year old will probably get a DS this year for Christmas. Or maybe some really cool games for the computer.
PUt your foot down and just say NO. then tell her I already told you how I feel, PERIOD.

And it's your dog isn't it? :o) Because mommy always feeds it, and waters it, and lets it out and trains it. I have three of those.

Boy, lots of answers. Our oldest was 12 3/4 when he got his in 6th grade and he was one of the last of his friends. He had been asking for one for sometime, but we finally said yes when it became just as important to us as it was to him. We were dropping him off at sports, etc. and needed to be able to communicate with him. He's been pretty responsible with it; we've had a few issues, but no significant complaints. It's been VERY helpful and convenient for us to communicate with him. We will do the same with our younger son; he will probably get one at age 12 in 6th grade. He's not quite as responsible as his older brother though so we'll see. Could be more interesting the 2nd time around.

My daughter is 6 and I kind of decided on around the age of 10 getting a cell phone. You have to make the judgment as a parent tho based on her maturity and everything else. You should not worry about what the other kids have if that is not what you want. On the other hand you could get one of those cell phones that can only call and text certain ppl if that is what u r worried about.

We did get our 11 year old daughterr a cell phone, only becuase we were building in another town and they were going to that school. I had a longer commute and wanted to touch base with her if I was running late. I got her a cheap trac phone. Sounds like your daughter doesnt need one right now. My 9 year old daughter wants one also because some of her friends have one. We have said no because she really doesnt need one. We are getting her an ITOUCH for Christmas, which will have everything she needs or wants for now.

nope. i have a 3 year old and he doesnt get a cell phone either.

are we retarded (as a society)?? seriously? just a few years ago it was UNHEARD of for kids in school to have a cell phone. i mean, WOW, kids went to school, had practice for whatever, went to a game, and probably only talked to their parents once on a pay phone. WHAT?!?! i know the thought totally blows the mind of most people. i mean, not being able to have immediate contact with a child? seriously? how hard is it to call the school? wow.

i fully support your choice here, and theres nothing wrong with saying no. there are however other "techy" gifts you could give her like a mp3 player of some kind (i loath to say ipod), a nintendo DS, or something. HOWEVER, i wouldnt let her take those items to school anyway, the risk of losing it or being stolen are far to high. so even IF you got her the cell phone, what are the chances you would really let her take it to school anyway? i know i wouldnt want to spend that kind of money and let my kid take it to school and lose it.

besides, who says getting your kid a cell phone has to mean that they have one with games? my husband and i both have cell phones that flip out for calling and flip the long way for a keyboard. no games on this phone, and its definatly nothing like the iphones. if you think at some point she needs a phone, they have simple, adult controlled phones that you literally control who she even can call, and if she can even text at all. i dont know what they are called, but they sound like they give you all the ability to get ahold of her, and her you, but no other fancy options, nor the ability to call anyone but whom YOU allow that phone to call. just because she wants a cell phone doesnt mean she needs to get an iphone. seriously? a 200$ bill for her to play games and up her "status"?? i dont think so. when she gets her own job, she can pay the 200 for a fancy phone.

LOL!~
anyway, you gave her a laptop? wow. thats more than i would do for an 11 year old. im not the parent here; but i sure hope that you still have rules and time limits for her on that thing, just as you would on the family computer. shes gonna hit homework really soon if she hasnt already! and then shes going to have to know how to prioritize and control the computer time. that starts with your guidance.

anyway good luck. i dont think she needs a phone, especially a fancy one, until she can pay for it. however, if you think in a couple years that she needs one, you still dont have to get her an iphone or anything resembling it. you are the parent, you make the decisions here. especially if its on your dime. i would rather you put that 200$ a month into an IRA or something similar so that you and your husband have a good retirement, or at least an emergency fund or something. or use it to pay off debt.

If she just wants something to play games get her an Itouch. My son loves his-does everything that a iphone does except make cell calls. Tons of fun apps to choose from and you can download TV programs also. I would hold off on the cell for as long as you can-texting constantly and cyber bullying would be big concerns of mine if I had a daughter your's age.

You are not the only parent. My daughter will not be getting a cell phone any time soon, either. Kids can be disappointed and it's ok! She doesn't need a cell phone. If you want to get her a hand-held game device for the bus ride, maybe that would be ok.

If you feel strongly about this, then say so to your daughter. Don't state it as a punishment, but as a reality. A cell phone is a responsibility and for safety reasons so that she can communicate with you, if needed. I would decide (ahead of time with your husband) under what circumstances you would "re-open" the dialogue. Maybe if she gets involved in afterschool activities, home alone for an extended period of time, specific age that you feel is appropriate. I say this b/c if you say "not right now", the next question will be "When?". Have an answer prepared and stick to it! If the circumstances arise that require another conversation, then talk about it again.

Please make it clear, though, that there will NOT be one under the tree so she isn't disappointed.

i would say NO and stick to it. i am seeing kids younger than 11 with them and i just want to ask their parents Are you kidding me! What the he** does a kid that young need a cell phone for. my boys will not be getting one till they can afford one. all though i have seen cell phones for kids where they can only call 4 numbers, parent, 911, grandma?. that would be the type of phone i would get my kids if any thing. there are no games,text messages nothing other than those 4 numbers.

Hi A.,

If you don't want her to have one yet and don't believe she needs one, there is your answer. There are many handheld electronic games that you could get her if all she wants to do is play games on the bus. However, you may want to request that she demonstrate more responsibility before giving her a handheld game device that has a big price tag.

Talk to her ahead of time about your reasons for not allowing her to have a phone at this point to help curb disappointment on the holiday. Also, think about when you might realistically be in favor of getting her a phone and talk to her about when that might be (e.g. when she turns 13, 14, etc.; when she graduates from 8th grade, whatever you decide) and specify what behaviors she must demonstrate in order to have a phone (being honest, following parents' rules, helping around the house, keeping good grades, etc.). This will give her something to work towards and something to look forward to if she does the right things.

Spend some time talking with her about not having to compare what she has vs. what others have in order to feel good about herself. Remind her there is a big difference between where she is now (at 11) and the kids she sees on the bus who are in the older grades. Encourage her to play with her "toys and little kid things" that she truly enjoys, regardless of what others might think, and help her to understand the importance of following her own interests rather than doing things as a result of peer pressure (feeling like she shouldn't play with those things for fear of being ridiculed by peers). Kids are too often forced to "grow up" and give up beloved playthings and activities by pressure from images in the media (movies, music videos, magazines, etc.) suggesting that they should be acting in ways that are well beyond their currrent developmental level---e.g. 6 year olds watching a teenage Hannah Montana and getting subtle and sometimes not so subtle messages regarding what behaviors, activities, attitudes, etc. make someone one popular, accepted by peers, etc.

Hope this helps!

J. F.

I agree with you for many reasons
1. resposablility
2. many schools do not allow in in school, and with us parents having a phone why have more?
3. Bullys have enough ways to torture kids, lets not add another avenue.

I wouldn't give in either, but I would suggest a TracPhone if you do. Walmart has a kit for $9.88. Includes the phone, car charger (I think), case, headset, and in house charger. You then buy a card with the minutes for $19.99. This kit automatically gives you double minutes and double service time for those minutes. So instead of 60 minutes for 90 days, we got 120 minutes for 150+ days for the same price. This is a cheap and easy way to also teach responsibility. If she uses all her minutes she's done until the agreed upon time to get more. Easy to set up. Can text if want to also.

This set up is our backup when our 14yo teenager gets her phone taken aaway when she's grounded. We don't have a house phone and the only numbers in the tracphone are numbers we put in. She is only allowed to call those numbers when she's grounded, mainly just to check in.

Be firm. Kids nowadays seem to get whatever they want whenever they want it. Their only connection to the outside world is through those darn phones. And if you think they only text a little, with our unlimited messaging, DD goes through 15,000+ texts a month! Unlimited messaging is the way to go it you do a regular cell plan. At $0.10 a text, overage charges add up fast if they can't control their texting.

Have her earn a good portion of the cost of getting a phone will help her be more responsible for it. If kids don't spend their own hardearned money on something, they don't care enough about it to take good care of it. DD has had to save her money for most of her techy gifts. She bought her own ipod touch, paid for half her cell phone, and if it needed replacing she had to forfeit her allowance to pay the deductible. Teach responsibility on your terms!

I can't stand cell phones for kids(no offense anyone!) My kids can get a cell phone when they are 18 and have a job to pay for it! I am sure I am in the minority- but I just don't see the need for one and I don't like getting my children expensive electronic devices that will break or be lost easily.
If my children really need to use a phone to get a hold of me or their dad- there are plenty of ways to do it. I absolutely hate texting! My sister was out here visiting for a couple of weeks(she's in high school) and she was constantly texting her friends and boy friend back home! Even when we were trying to have a conversation! I find it extremely rude and annoying.
Okay- sorry about my mini rant- I guess the answer I would give my daughter(and I have given my daughter) is no- you are not getting a cell phone- end of discussion.
~C.

Sounds like she doesn't NEED one, but just WANTS one to be just like the other kids. Ask her if she's so 'mature' enough for a phone, what will she use it for? Who is she going to text? Who is she going to call? Does she just want to play games? Take pictures? Perhaps there is another product out there better than an expensive phone plus monthly texting and usage fees. Chances are good that you guys would get her a phone and she wont like it anyways -- "It's the wrong one." My phone doesn't even have a camera nor can I download funny ring tones. It'd be a bummer for y'all to get it for her, only for her to be dissappointed anyways.

Remind her now that she's not getting it and tell her to write something else on her list. Show her other products online (like a gameboy?).

No you are not! We too have given our 11yo & 6 Yo a cell phone to share and they had specific responsiblities with it that they had to adhere to. We had to take the cell phone and we will give them another chance sometime in the future.

No, you are not the only parents saying "no" to a cell phone. We told our kids 13 was the age they needed to be to have one and that they are responsible for paying the monthly fee for it. My 13 year old got one and my 12 year old CAN'T WAIT to get one, but our rule is our rule. We are teaching him a lot about patience, which is a good quality to have. Stay strong in your convictions, especially if you don't feel she's responsible enough yet. Good luck! K.

I am glad you asked this question. like you, my kids, (twins 10 and 6) don't believe I won't get them one for the same reasons. (I'm a sucker) Except with this.

I think giving them a cell phone is just one more responsibility that they don't need to take on until there is a need for it OR they can afford it themselves. I have talked to them and if I really need to I leave mine with them to see exactly how they will treat the responsibility.

But until the need is there, the phone isn't. It's just too much.

My 8 year-old daughter has a cell phone. It costs $10/month instead of the $25/month her dad and I were each spending to have Internet phones in our houses so that she was always able to call us. This was a cheaper and easier option. It doesn't have texting, so that's not an issue. She just keeps it in her backpack so it's always with her and she knows it's there for her use. She rarely uses it, and she is responsible with her things.

I'm 45 and still don't want a cell phone. I can't imagine an 11 year old with a need for one.

My kids want them. Not happening, at least not for a while. If they were really involved in after school things, it wiuld probably be different but they come straight home from school. I told them high school. Also my girls want smart phones. They are going to be surprised to get regular cell phones.

The the ipod touch. You can monitor the games she is downloading and she can text if she has access to a wireless connection, mostly at home for you to monitor. Also, you are not crazy, at this point, I will not be allowing cell phones until my kids are driving. I don't see a need until then. I somehow survived w/o the cell phone and my parents are still alive, no death due to anxiety. I think you are one the right track. Stay strong.

Don't feel bad, you did the right thing. We told our sons they would only get a cell phone when they started extra curricular activities that we did not attend with. When my oldest started middle school and joined the band, he got a cell phone (three months shy of his 13th b-day).

Too bad she couldn't get an iTouch (not to mention they are expensive) but if she has shown lack of responsibility, I guess that wouldn't work either.

My 9 year old has been asking for one. I told her to ask again when she's 13. lol

I agree with you.. No cell phone at age 11... I never got my cell phone til i was almost 15... It would be a different thing if she was in sports and doing alot of after school activities my moms friend got her son a cell phone and he is 11 but he goes to friends and goes to his dads and does alot of different things after school

My kids are little, but when they are that age I will say no. At that age they are still usually with an adult, so what's the point. Now when they are 16 and driving, I will have to figure that one out. I'm think of the Disney phone that only calls certain people are allows certain people to call and has a GPS tracking system. No, I am not a paranoid mom, but my husband's parents were completely clueless and as a result, he and his brothers did some pretty wild stuff when growing up.

You could give her a prepaid cell phone. That way she will have one for an emergency but will not be able to run up the bill. My niece's friend was walking home from school (she lived in the same neighbor as the school) at 12 years old and a man started to chase her. A neighbor was driving by and saw her. The neighbor picked her up and called the cops. Turns out the man chasing her was a conviced sex offender. That is when I bought both my nieces a prepaid cell phone.

No, you're not alone! My 10 y/o daughter and 11 y/o son have been begging for cell phones for about a year, but we flat refuse. We've told them that they can have a cell phone when they can pay for it. I see no reason why a child of their age needs a phone. My daughter, who is 6, has a friend who has had a cell phone of her own since kindergarten! In my opinion that's just crazy!

My older two have accepted that they have to pay for their own phone and have begun talking about ways for them to earn money (mowing yards, shoveling snow, babysitting, ect.). If I add them to my plan, it won't be super expensive for thier part. I don't see them being able to earn enough for a cell phone for a few years, but I think there is no reason for them to need one until then. I didn't have a cell phone until I was in my 20's and I survived. I'm sure my kids can survive until they can pay for one as well. Until then, if they need to make a phone call, they can use my phone!

If I had it to do over again I would have never gotten my son a phone. I didn't do because "everyone else has one" but because I am a single parent, with no family or friends in the area to rely on, who had to be at work by 5:30am and I wanted to make sure my son would get up and catch the bus on time. It was used to maintain contact with him rather then for his "social life." But, again, if it hadn't been for that reason I would never have gotten one and would definitely recommend not getting one especially for one so young.

I can tell you horror stories of the text messages he has received. Cell phones have replaced the concept of "liquid courage" that we experienced growing up. Children have grow-up in this technological environment totally uninhibited because they can say, send and imply to do things that they would never otherwise do in person. They have no shame and as a result no value for life or who's they destroy if not their own.

My son is almost 15 now and no longer has a phone. He does have limited use of mine in the evenings.

PS Note the increased number of suicides that have resulted since introducing our children to the newest advents of technology.

I didn't read most of your post. Based solely on the age of 11, I would also say no to a cell phone. Your reasoning is good!

My granddaughter, 10, uses both her parents' phones and mine to play games. We find having that available for her and her younger brother very helpful. Perhaps you could give her a hand held game for Christmas. I'm not up on what's available but 20 years ago, I bought one for my daughter and she was well entertained.

If she is will not talk and just wants to play games, but about an iPod Touch. If later she wants to try texting, there are apps that will allow that.

Good for you, I know you have reached a deciding but just wanted to let you know, you are not alone, my son will be 15 in December and still does not have one. We have set down guidelines for him to get one, but he has not met them yet...if he can't meet the guidelines to get one I sure don't see getting him one only to be disappointed that he could not live up to the rules of having one.
The only reason we are disappointed that he has not had one have been in instances when he was not where he was supposed to be, so I chalk that up to this is REALLY why he does not need one, because if we had just called, we would have never known where he Really was...not that ll kids are bad, but I think cell phones let us off the hook and can lead to lazy parenting.

You are no alone.
My children should never be anywhere where there is not an adult present. Since they cannot drive themselves anywhere, I don't see how they should need one.
I told my daughter if she can come up with a really good reason, or, the money to pay for one on a monthly basis, then, I would consider it.
She has yet to come up with either one. :)

Glad you got it worked out! Just wanted to add that my 13 yr old has a Go Phone (no texting allowed) that he carries for emergencies, however he is a guy and has no desire to give out his number to a bunch of kids...he doesn't even know his friends numbers. Guess it depends on the kid. My 10 yr old really wants one but we told her no. We gotta protect our kids on all fronts and I think you did the right thing.

My oldest is 9 and hubby and I are talking about her getting one in the next few years with it's sole purpose being to get in touch with us. It will be very basic with no perks. I like the phones where they have a set in numbers they can call and 911

get her a cheap throw away one-glad there were no cell phones until my kids reached high school-but i wouldve never bought them one-if you feel that strong...no means no...plain an simple.why dread the holidaze because of a dang cell phone.tell her to read a book on the bus or do crossword puzzles.sounds like she just want to follow the crowd...dont let something so trivial as this ruin a joyus time..really...

the ONLY reason i got a cell phone at 16 (im 22 now) was because i drove like 35 mins to school and i had a clunker of a first car(good thing too cuz its in a scrap yard somewere now lol) and mom wanted me to be able to get ahold of her if anything happned. my little sister on the other hand is 11 and mom got her one of those at&t go phones to see how she did with it, has been going pretty good actually. she keeps it off until like u said bus ride home(long route too) and she calls mom or gma and talks about her day or plays games. but most of the time its off and in her purse. she says if she wants to talk to someone shell call them lol,

Buy her a rosetta stone set.

Tell her when she can master a language she has showed enough self disciplne for a phone.

this is just an example.

Status symbols are nothing more then a trinket. Buy her a pen pal from one of the childrens charities her own age....so she can see how 80 % of the population of the world lives! America has so much more then status symbols going for it, she has unparralled opportunity!

Take her to a memorial park or a veterans parade in nov., and give her a book about females in the milatary or high business!

Take her phone issue in hand and nail it before christmas! you take her 11 year old curiosity about life and give her anne of green gables or some other incredible story of adveristy and make the set something just as valuable and expensive as a phone! if you have more then enough make it a gold lined set or special edition.

Dread christmas? I had socks,new p.j.s's, one skirt, a new bedset, and five books for christmas when I was 11. We ate beef stew every week that winter!, because then we would taste beef when the beef was all gone after the second day! we ate tukey and all the traditional extras on christmas and it was an occasion and I had no clue my mother had to plan all the shopping for black friday so she could at least get us all something! we are in a recession, the 11 year old daughter should not make you dread anything! not to rant but if you are in a graced position to have more then enough and you simply do not want her to run blind with the pack then take that energy and redirect it before christmas, before veterans day, before halloween!

Teach her how you balance the checkbook, teach her how you plan a gathering or the weeks shoppings for groceries, give her the reins to buy for the week for groceries and give her advice and then eat whatever she buys so she can see the ways you make life so glorious. Your teaching can be gentle ( my experiences were not hard...my childhood wasn't awful, I didn't know how hard things were) just use all the charm you have!

The phone should drop if she sees why you're committed to focus on something else.

I know you already decided not to give her a cell phone, but I just wanted to put in my opinion here. I completely agree with you! My best friend's daughter, who just turned 6, had a cell phone when she was 5. Just so she could call her grandma whenever she wanted. Well, I think she could use the landline or her mom's phone for that. I think that is way too young to have a cell phone. I couldn't get one till I was 16, so why do so many middle schoolers have phones nowadays? I know times are changing, but it's a little ridiculous in my mind. No kid that young NEEDS a cell phone. My rule is, when they're 16 and have a job to pay for it themselves. My oldest, who is 7, never asked me for one. But she's getting a DS Lite for Christmas, so she'll be happy. :) Thanks for letting me share my opinion! :)

my kids are 15 and almost 17 no cell phones, I told them, they can have one, if they can pay for one.
They are fine.

No, my husband and I agreed our children wouldn't have cell phones until they were 13 or 14...until it became apparent that we would have to adjust our rules when we realized our children had no way to contact us when off visiting the other parent who is very neglectful. So, if there is no safety issues, I don't see why children can't wait until they're older. I think you did the right thing!

My daughter is one of the only kids in her school who does not have a cell phone. Granted, she doesn't have a long bus ride (we live close to school) but I said no because she doesn't need one (I am always picking her up and taking her where she needs to go) and I think at 11 she's too young. Our kids have their whole lives to be adults--why rush?

Nope. My 9y wants one. He doesn't need it. He lives in walking distance of his school, 2 houses down from his 2 best friends.