Almost 2 Y/o Only Wants His Daddy

J.,

I don't see why your son wanting your husband should hurt you. Be happy that he wants one of his parents! I am always grateful whenever one of my boys wants their daddy. It gives me a break! Your son loves you, but for now, he wants his daddy. It won't always be that way. I'm sure sometimes he'll want you, and others, he'll want his daddy. I don't see why this should bring you to tears. Just be happy that you have a beautiful, happy, healthy son.

If dad is not always there (like when he's at work) children always want what they don't or can't have. My kids are older and they still want dad when he's not home. It's natural and it in no way means you are any less important.

I feel your pain. From the time my son was about10 months to about 14 months, he only wanted daddy. It killed me and I cried a few times as well. From about 14 months to about 18 months, he wanted us equally. From 18 months to now (21 months), he has only wanted me. And as much as I love it, I can see it upsets my husband a bit. The point is, these are phases, and they do flip flop. Like someone else said, take advantage while this phase lasts. When he's back to only wanting you, you wont be able to get anything done!

You need to change your attitude about this. I know it is hard, but you need to learn to take joy in the fact that your son is bonding with his dad too. Nothing is more joyful than a baby reaching out for you. Think of all the times in his life when he reached for you, and now think about your husband's joy when that baby is reaching out for him.

Throughout his life he will have times when he seems closer to you and times when he seems closer to dad. It seems to go in cycles and they are very healthy cycles. So this is the first of many. By reaching out to dad your son is becoming more independent; he is learning that dad is an important constant in his life who loves him as much as mom; and he is exploring his options. He will come back to you, then go through another dad phase.

You cannot take this personally or raising your baby will be a roller coaster ride. You have to take pleasure in the fact that your baby is normal and is able to form bonds with others. When your baby says when you reach for him, "NO! Daddy!" instead of getting upset, view it as a little bit of free time. Say to your husband, "You win again!" and go read a book or do something you've missed doing.

A baby's smile, love and attention is a bit like winning the lottery. Take pleasure when your husband wins instead of taking it as a personal rejection.

VickiS

definitly a phase.My son used to push me away when my husband came home from work and say bye mommy and just wanted me to leave the room so he could be with just daddy.Just try to think how wonderful it is that he has that bond with his daddy.I also began to notice therre were mommy things and daddy things like daddy is for rough housing and mommy is for when I have abad dream or feel sick.Or like when we go swimming he wants daddy until he gets tired and then he will let me hold him for a second while he rest and then its back to daddy.I get to do all the quiet loving snuggly things and dday get the crazy hyer things.LOL!Anway he definitly went throuhg the daddy stage and it hurt my feeling cause I dont work I stay at home with him and he wouls sit there all day and ask about daddy.He is better now though and there isnt as mush favoritism.The thing is though boys are going to have that father son bond and go out and have father son time like football fishing those kinds of things but he will always be your baby and need you even if it doesnt feel like it you are the glue of the family kepp your head up.Good Luck!!Being a mom is like watching your heartbeat from the outside.

J.:

My youngest son was always very close to me (when he was little, he wouldn't have ANYTHING to do with Dad), however for the last year or so he has been going through an "only daddy" stage. He is 14 years old, so I know it is important for him to bond with his Dad. Luckily, he can also tell me what is he is thinking.

He finally told me that he really needs to get to know Dad. He has been pretending not to like me, but deep down, he really still loves me. He is just getting older and can't show it as much. Your son may be experiencing the same thing even though he is much younger. He simply can't explain it to you.

I love the 'only daddy' phases. It means my son and husband are really bonding. I love to hear the giggles out of both of them and I love to see them having a great time 1-on-1. Take the time to organize some closets, have lunch or dinner with your girlfriends, grocery shop by yourself, take a bath, read a book, etc, etc, etc.

Your son and husband are building bonds that are tremendously important and vital to your son learning how to be a good man. This is your husband's time to shine. Don't feel sad or left out because remember... NO ONE is mommy. :)