Afternoon Grumps.

I will NOT allow a child to rob me of at least a few minutes of silence. They know I mean business and we do not have any struggle with our kids of any age during naps. Sure, sometimes they wimper or talk to themselves. But we are consistent with the routine and talking or running around is not tolerated at all.

However, if they are willing and able to be quiet, I'll give them some movie time. I have computers and comfortable chairs set up with headphones and netflix for the children that are 3 or 4 years old. Before 3, NO DICE. They will sleep before that.

It sounds like you are doing a good job. Just never forget that you are important too.

Mrs. Lola:

Find balance between what you want to do and what they are *needing*, not necessarily what they are *wanting*. I can't tell you exactly what that looks like, because it does change from day to day.

Some ideas:

Look into an insulin-regulating diet for lunchtime. That is, be sure to balance your carbs with your proteins. (If you go to the website for The Zone diet, it will help.And the options are good, too. Didn't feel like food-restriction, just food guidance.) I did this a few years ago and was amazed at how much energy I had in the afternoons, and how much less crabby I was.

Cut yourself some slack. It's awesome that you want to use cloth diapers, and also consider G Diapers or buy a pack of disposables for when you really need to get out. Cloth diapering is a way of life, but it shouldn't be something oppressive or a burden. Save the environment but sacrifice some of your sanity? Again, balance....

Teach your bigger girl how to take a Quiet Rest Time. Just because she's given up naps doesn't mean that *you* don't need a break. When little one is resting, have the older one take a significant break. I use a timer. Start with 15 minutes that she has to stay in her room (or another quiet place) and can play quietly. Add on a bit of time each day, and work toward 40 minutes. It is possible. You will have to make a committment to yourself that you will keep taking her back to her room, deal with the "I don't want to"s , etc. And always make it a pleasant thing; I read my son a short story on his bed first, then tell him "play quietly and I'll see you when the timer goes 'ding'. " If you want more information about this, PM me. YOU need this time for you... there's no contract that says we are theirs, body soul and spirit 24/7. We need to recharge, or we do have 'the afternoon grumpies'...

Lastly, have your afternoon mapped out according to what works for you in regard to getting chores done, meals on the table, etc. Include your kids as much as you can in the housework, when it suits. Don't feel badly about giving your teething younger one motrin or tylenol as directed and as needed. Teething really hurts some children more than others.

i would really suggest losing the "the kids rule the routine" mentality - kids thrive off a set schedule and routine. yes, flexibility is great, but allowing them to go with the flow is going to lead to all kinds of stress on you that is completely unnecessary, especially dropping everything to accomodate them if they decide they want to play outside. kids, heck, most people, are just happier, more secure, and more comfortable in a routine. it's just like the consistent discipline everyone tells us is so important. it's part of the world that they can count on. so first i would set down and write out one. of course it can vary from day to day, but the basics - meal times, errand times, snack times play times, clean up times, etc, should be the same each day. if they know that yes, after lunch every day is quiet time, it will be easier to convince them to take it.

also, you don't mention if you snack or not, but afternoons are a real common time for people to feel this way, just like you said. i suggest a light snack of almonds and some juice or something. keep your energy level up.

last, i would absolutely put my foot down at the "child" deciding to stop taking naps. my son is 5 and we still do quiet time. "I" deserve it, and i absolutely believe we all NEED it. he is happier and healthier the rest of the day if i enforce that. now granted if there is a day we don't do much active, then i can tell he won't sleep, so we will watch a movie (often i turn something on in my room, so i can actually catch a nap. on these days if he doesn't fall asleep that's fine). but on active days he will still take a nap in the afternoons.

Why don't you take a look at what you're eating? Your blood sugar may take a dive in the afternoons. Plan some healthy daily snacks for yourself and your older child - with a little protein to get blood sugar up slowly and keep it there (as opposed to something like candy, with which your energy rises quickly and then crashes again). It can really help.

When a child says "I don't want to nap," you can institute *rest* time - which is what big kids (including mamas) do. The rules are simple: feet stay off the floor, head stays on the pillow (more or less), voice stays at a whisper. Books and crayons/paper are fine (encourage reading, even if it's just reading the pictures). Sleep is optional. Emphasize that she gets to rest rather than nap because she's a big girl now.

Meanwhile, devote that rest time to *yourself* as much as you can (around the baby's teething). You need that rest time - it's just as important as dishes, laundry, or the computer. Then get some protein into yourself and you can keep going until dinner, probably.

You want to meet your children's needs, and that's good; however, children don't always know what it is they *actually* need. That's why God gave them mamas.

Allow yourself that afternoon quiet time. It's a physical impossibility to operate with high energy all day long. It's OK to stare at paint for a couple of hours. It gives your body time to recharge.

Have snacks during that time. Part of the slump is low blood sugar.

Expect that your youngest will be grumpy while teething and that she will be clumsy. I wonder about the times. We didn't worry every time our children bumped their head. We didn't worry about preventing accidents. Accidents happen, bruises appear. Our children learn from them. It is not our job to make their world perfect.

Be kind to yourself. Let go of perfection. Go with the flow. It's not like you're sitting around doing nothing all day. Accept yourself when you need the down time to recharge.

There are whole countries that have a formal siesta time. You are normal to crave that down time. Allow yourself to have it.

The reason she is acting this way is because her body still needs the nap. I would put the little one down and then go lay down with this girl and just keep her on the bed and do quiet boring things. I bet after Christmas she will be less excited and will start having afternoon naps again.

BTW, your body is signaling you that it needs a break too. That is why you'd rather watch paint dry than anything else at that time. Your body is ready to sit down and get it's turn to just relax.

I'm just like you-lots of energy in the AM and then get tired in the afternoon. With a baby in your home, it's going to be tough to get that quiet time unless you work around her schedule. Is there any time between noon and 4 that the baby is asleep? Grab that opportunity to put a DVD on for your oldest and go enjoy some time to yourself. On days when this doesn't work out, I suggest a strong cup of coffee.