2 Questions - East Wenatchee,WA

Hello! I think 6 weeks old is WAY too young to let him cry it out. Give him as much love and affection as you can-you cannot spoil a baby!! Babies this young need you to comfort them, whenever they need it.

Aww, I miss that.........

Don't worry about him forming bad habits now. You have a lot of time ahead of you for establishing routines and he will learn what is expected of him!

Good luck!

I wouldn't start trying crying it out for at least 6-9 months.
He's fresh from the womb and he needs to be held.
I know it's exhausting - new babies are tough.
Hang in there.
It will get better eventually.

Babies that young can't really be said to have habits, either bad or good. They do have natural inclinations and preferences, which are the things that work best and get the results you both need. Babies have been nursed to sleep from the beginning of time, because that's what gets them content and relaxed.

Babies don't "learn to self-soothe" to sleep, according to many researchers. That's a phrase some self-appointed "expert" made up, probably someone with an easy sleeper, and it stuck, because it's what so many parents are desperate to hear and believe.

But some babies are naturally easy sleepers, and can sleep for hours at a time right from day one. More often, babies wake several times a night for the first year or more. Some will drift off to sleep with only a bit of fussing. Some babies do learn to give up if crying doesn't get their needs met after several days of "sleep training."

Other babies, the ones who experience their worlds the most intensely, will never give up, even if left to cry for hours, week after week. They are just not able to relax enough to sleep, and crying gets them even more worked up. They desperately need the comfort and closeness that only a warm, caring adult can offer. Brain scans show that babies left to cry on their own for long periods daily have actual changes in the sizes of certain brain structures. Longer-term studies suggest that these babies do not usually grow into an easy childhood.

It's also useful to know that MANY children's sleep patterns will go through a few of dramatic changes during their first year or two, often coordinating with growth spurts or developmental changes like crawling, walking and learning to use words. Good sleepers may suddenly have trouble falling or staying asleep, and this is no fault of the child.

Dr. Harvey Karp, author of The Happiest Baby on the Block, explains in these short videos why he calls the first 3 months the Fourth Trimester, and explains why babies run pretty much according to their own needs for the first 3-4 months:

How-to's: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6KnVPUdEgQ&feature=re...

Enhanced sleep: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tk5MUOMecHI&NR=1

Interview: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iu0TtxO-ocY&feature=re...

!st - if it is in the fridge and hasn't been exposed to saliva (ie, hasn't been in a bottle he was drinking out of), about a day, maybe two. If it's in the bottle he was just drinking, I wouldn't suggest saving it for more than about 4 hours, in the fridge (most people will probably say throw it out immediately).

2nd - this is an loaded subject. Some people swear by CIO and think it's the best thing ever. From both my schooling (Child Development degree) and experience as a mom, I think it's pointless. SOME babies (maybe even many of them) will eventually cry themselves to sleep. But really, a baby's main emotional development goal until at least a year is to learn that his environment is safe and reliable and that mom is there to take care of him and protect him. CIO just doesn't do that. I actually nursed my babies to sleep until they were weaned. In fact, we co-slept. I didn't create any long-term bad habits. My "baby" just turned 8, and all my kids are excellent sleepers. They go to bed on their own (I tell them bedtime, sometimes I have to be firm, but they climb into bed, I tuck them in with a kiss, and leave) and have been for a couple of years. Occasionally the youngest will come in to our room at night, but I can just send him back.
So... the jist of all that is, IMO, don't make him cry himself to sleep. Let him move through baby-hood stages at his own pace and don't worry about "sleep training."
(If you do go with CIO, I would wait until at least 3-6 months. Babies younger than that just need too much attention naturally for CIO)

If he hasn't finished the bottle, just stick it back in the fridge and use it for the next feeding. If he has not touched the bottle, it will be fine for hours.

I nursed my kids to sleep. When they were older I rocked them to sleep. I loved that time with them. Please don't worry about habits. At this age they don't really develop habits. In fact, I often found what worked for 2 weeks would suddenly stop working and I would have to find a new trick or two. At this age, just do whatever works for your child. Our kids slept in the swing, the bouncy seat, the car seat, in bed with us, their own crib. Seriously, whatever works. The best place for baby to sleep is wherever baby sleeps (so Mamma can sleep, too :-).

I do not agree with CIO. Babies cry because they need something. They don't cry to manipulate. At this age, they need to learn that when they need something Mommy or Daddy (or someone) will be there for them. They need to know that they are safe and their needs will be met. Don't worry about spoiling him. Just be there for him. He will learn to put himself to sleep when he's older. For now, just let him be a baby.

Thawed milk must be used within 24 hours of thawing, and breastmilk must be used within five hours of not being in a fridge.

As for crying to sleep, it is not recommended to do this before six months of age. Young babies need to first develop trust in their parents. Your son needs to know that you are there for him and will meet his basic needs. I know it's tough when they're so little and you're so tired, but wait a bit before you let him cry.

If it actually works for people as early as 1 month old its because the baby is naturally good at soothing him or herself. In general though, that is too young. Personally, I think there is always a way to help them fall asleep without resorting to CIO. Even if it does work, it's not a one time fix. I don't understand why CPS would be called if you let your child cry for several hours during the day but somehow it;s ok if its at bedtime because you are using a "method". I never froze my BF so I am no help. But I can tell you that I nursed my son to sleep every night for almost 2 1/2 years. I did worry about "breaking the habit" but when it was time, he was ok with it and didn't cry or even ask. I thought it was the most natural way to wean and besides the stress I caused myself worrying if it was "OK", it was a beautiful time. Don't worry and do what your heart tells you!

Don't worry about your baby picking up sleeping habits! Your baby is doing what's natural for it. My son is now 17 months old. I've nursed him from birth and co-slept with him from about 4-5 months onward. (Got too tired getting up to breastfeed him at night.) Now? He is slowly weaning himself off on his own and can sleep on his own for longer periods, though we still co-sleep. Our doctor told us to do the CIO but we didn't listen-- and I'm so glad we didn't!

Here's how it went for us:

Newborn - 2 months: Woke up several times at night to nurse. He slept in his crib.

2 - 5 months. Sleeping throughout the night. But waking up a couple of times still to be breastfed then took a long while to put back to sleep. This took a lot of effort for me so we ended up co-sleeping with him.

6 - 12 months. He picked up the habit of nursing throughout the night! I read this is normal for cosleeping toddlers. At first I worried over this. Even in the daytime he'd nurse every chance he got! But the good thing is, my breast milk supply went up! If we hadn't coslept with him, my supply might've dried up by then. And then--

12 months onward. He began nursing less frequently. Often he'd nurse and then break off to run and do something else. Starting at about 14 months, our son began spending more and more time playing on his own. Often he'd fall asleep in my or his dad's arms without nursing! The nicest thing? He stopped waking up crying. He'd just open his eyes and look around contentedly when he sees us. (Even when I wasn't in the room and he's with his dad, he'd get down the bed on his own and look for me.)

Present. My son is getting more and more content to sleep without being held. He still expects to cosleep. But when he wakes up, he will sometimes just look at me and go lay back down (even when I'm not holding him, just watching him nearby). He nurses less and less. Best of all, he is so confident and trusting. He knows he can come up and snuggle with us when he needs it but he's also free to play and run around.

Anyway, in my experience, nursing to sleep shouldn't and need not be avoided. It's great for bonding. But if you want your child to go to sleep without nursing, perhaps another adult like Dad could rock him to sleep instead of you? We did that with my son too sometimes. He'd readily go to sleep without the boobie when it's Dad holding him.

Can't help you with the breast milk thing because I never pumped. But as far as the sleep thing, why do you have a problem with him falling asleep while nursing? My daughter did that every night until she was just over 1 year and after that she would nurse and I would put her down in her crib and she would just fall asleep. She is 16 months old now and she goes to bed GREAT. As long as you have a routine with your baby everything will be fine.

I would nurse mine, put them to bed, let them fuss a little, then if they still keep crying, get them up and nurse them again. I'd let them fuss a little longer each time and it really helped them learn to sleep better. Nurse for 10 minutes each side, put to bed and let cry for 5 minutes, repeat then put to bed and let fuss for 10 minutes etc. I usually only had to do that a couple times and they'd learn to sleep through the night etc. That's the one thing I love about breastfeeding. Also, when they are sick, I nurse them over and over and it helps them get better faster and keeps them from fussing from feeling terrible. Good luck!

It's been 8 years since I breast fed - I believe it was 8 or 12 hours - as long as it wasn't sitting in the sun or something hot like that.

At 6 weeks - I would hold him as much as I wanted and he wanted - you can NEVER spoil him by holding him...he just spent up to 9 months in a nice tight spot...it's a HUGE shock to be in the big world now! :)

I know what you mean about nursing to sleep - I did that...it was a hard habit to break - but you can GENTLY wake him when you take him off so he's not sound asleep - as least that's what I did with my babies...

both of my babies were belly sleepers as well...NICU started it and that's how they are today - belly sleepers...

I think if you are going to do the Cry It Out method then you should start doing it soon....i personally don't like that method. We didn't do that - we would give them about 5 minutes to see if they could settle themselves - if not - then they got comforted...my youngest had HUGE problems so he couldn't lay down for more than 30 minutes...turned out he needed tubes in his ears (he was 4 weeks pre-mature, stopped breathing several times (flat-lined) and his first APGAR score was a 2....he was also born with pneumonia....it was a VERY challenging first year with him...my daughter? (now 25 this year?) slept the night through at 8 weeks...my son - 6 weeks premature (first son) was sleeping the night through at 6 weeks and was a TOTALLY easy baby!!! If Nicky had been my first - we probably wouldn't have had anymore! (LOL!!)

Any way - you need to do what works for you and your family....you might end up taking a PART of a suggestion from one mama and PART of a suggestion from another mama....to make it work for you!!

CONGRATS AND GOOD LUCK!!

You never let him cry himself to sleep. Until he is a year old he needs to be held and rocked and cared for endlessly. You want to turn another neurotic male out into society.
This Ferber method is a recycle and to be honest no society of native people in the entire world ever let their babies cry it out.
Cry yourself to sleep is a VERY sick doctor inspired technique for the 40 and 50's and from it we got a generation of very rebellious people who did change society but had extreme problems. If you want a very rebellious child let him cry himself to sleep.
Personally I always held and rocked my children until they were asleep. It's called mothering.

Question #2 is loaded.
Lots of very strong opinions on that that are very different.
I happen to be pro Ferber method (what is often called Cry It Out, and often is misunderstood and mis-applied), however, I would not recommend using it until your baby is closer to 5-6 months of age.

You are on the right track with putting him in bed while drowsy but awake. And hey, if he does happen to zonk out on you before you get him in bed que sera sera.

Every family is different and for some it is using Ferber's method, for some it is co-sleeping, for some it is dealing with hours of crying at bedtime, or fpr some it is whatever (i.e. no "named" method). What works for one family or even for one baby (even within the same family) may not work for another. If co-sleeping is something you are interested in, then read about it and ask around. If it is not, then don't be bullied into thinking that you are hurting your baby by NOT doing it. Same with Ferber method or whatever else. Same with using a pacifier, or breast vs. formula, or Santa Claus or not.

One of the main mistakes people make about CIO is that you do not just abandon your baby, shut the door, walk away and let them cry until they fall asleep. You DO go check on them. You do soothe/comfort/respond to them. You just don't pick them up. And you extend the lapse of time before you go back in in between checks. Never longer than 15 minutes. (So maybe 3 minutes check and leave, then wait 5 min, then 8 min, then 10 min, etc... until you are at 15 min. At 15 minutes you'd continue to check on them at 15 min intervals. Usually, this isn't necessary after a 3 nights. The first is the longest for most people, and I recommend you use a timer/clock so that you are not guessing how much time has elapsed.

But again, I wouldn't attempt to use it until your baby is several months older than he is now. Around 5.5 months or so.

It's perfectly natural for a newborn to fall asleep on his or her own and then sort of "grow out of it" for lack of a better phrase. They're not really old enough to cry it out until about 6mos is what I've been told. Mine is almost 7mos and I'm still not ready to let him cry himself to sleep. It's crossed my mind, but I just can't do it yet. While your baby is young, read Healthy Sleep, Happy Child (I think that's what it's called). It's been recommended by several people. I've just started reading it...

You cannot spoil a baby - especially that young - by picking him up too much. He cries because he needs you. Needs something. Not because he's manipulating you.

I wouldn't try CIO until at least 6 months old.

I can't answers the question about breastmilk, but regarding crying himself to sleep, the minimum age to start would be around 6 months. Sleep training before that time is ineffective as they are too young.

I don't have much in the way of ideas to transition. I basically rocked my daughter until she was 18 months old. One thing that did help me for when I tried to put my daughter down droswy, but not asleep, was the Fisherprice Rainforest music/light mobile type thing. She loved it. But if she fussed a bit, it was ok, but if she was full on crying, I couldn't do it. I would try and lay her down and rub her back or stroke her arms(which she loved) until she fell asleep

I think it's GREAT that you can lay him down sleepy, let him fuss a minute, then fall asleep. This is WONDERFUL. Try to keep with that. That's my biggest piece of advice for new moms: "Put your kid to bed drowsy, not zonked out." I wouldn't let him cry for a long time at such a young age though. He's still such a little baby. :)

I don't know/remember about the milk question. When you touch it, is it cold? Cold I say stick it in the fridge and use it. That's liquid gold, girl! Has it come to room temp? Trash that.

We started at like 3-4 weeks.. you have to let them learn early people say it's mean but after 2 nights our daughter was self soothing and she's been an amazing sleeper ever since.

Oh and sorry I'm no help with the breast milk questions.. we went formula.

Can't remember about the breastmilk. I think it was really long, like 12 hours or something. Then again, maybe I'm crazy!

As for crying to sleep, definitely not at that age, IMO. I wrap baby up, arms snuggled in tightly, lay him/her down after nursing and almost asleep, and I have pretty good luck at baby falling asleep. If you use a pacifier, it comes in handy at this time too. It gets much more challenging the more mobile they get!

Often I stay in the room, folding laundry or something - or am in/out quickly doing things - the baby will watch and doze off. If the baby literally only fusses a few times, I'll leave him, or if it's few and far between, I'll leave him. But if he's actually really crying and it's obvious it's not going to stop really quickly, I pick him up or pat or something.

After my first, I decided I didn't want baby nursing to sleep. It got too demanding (especially once I had others I needed to take care of too). so, I totally hear you on your desire for that! When they are newborns, I let them nurse to sleep. As they get older, it's easier to not (at least with mine).

But, I'm not a cry-it-out type of person. I will holding/rock a crying baby, but I don't consider that crying it out at all. My baby is 12 months old now. And, if she wakes up at night and cries, I'll wait before going in and see if she settles back to sleep. But it's only a few minutes at the most. Usually she settles right back to sleep! I finally discovered that once. Usually I would run right in and grab her and feed her and get her back to sleep - often taking an hour before she was asleep enough to stay asleep when I laid her down (usually I co-sleep, but she won't sleep! my first child out of four that seems to prefer her own space...so odd..but I do sleep much more solidly now). Anyway, but one time I couldn't get to her right away, and she went back to sleep on her own. So, now I wait a few to see if she'll settle back down. I don't consider that crying it out either.

I'm rambling, as usual.

Hope that helps some. In my opinion, your baby is way too little to cry it out. If he fusses or something, I get leaving him and waiting to see if it turns into real crying or if he falls asleep before doing anything. Making sure he's wrapped up nice and snug helps tremendously too. Good luck!

Oh, and babysleepsite.com (or google "the baby sleep site") has great info for what to expect with how much they should/shouldn't sleep. Each child is different, but as they age, it can get confusing not being sure how much sleep they need because it changes so often. I'm not a scheduler, but I'm definitely a person who loves routine! It's a very helpful site.

4 month old (or older) is the appropriate age for CIO. Before that, they aren't developed enough.

Not completely sure on thawed milk but if you go to The leaky boob on Facebook and join then they can help you with that. (breastfeeding community and very supportive.) Second, most don't advise cio until six months of age. Nothing wrong with nursing him to sleep though...he'll get past it! :) Have you tried soft music or a white noise machine to soothe him to sleep? Or even swaddle him? There ideas may help him.