10 Year Old Seems to Have Constant PMS!

Updated on August 12, 2011
B.C. asks from Arlington, TX
13 answers

My oldest is 10 1/2. I love that kid, but geez! Lately she has been sooooooo moody! She is always complaining, yelling at her sister, back-talking, arguing, and just hating everything. Today while we did a craft, she couldn't get her thing to look exactly like the picture so all of a sudden crafts are stupid and her mask that she was making was "an idiot." Generally she is a happy child, very well behaved, etc. Nothing has changed besides our move across the highway in March. Is this faily typical for this age?? I thought I'd be hormone-free until she was at least 12! I feel like I already live with a teenager!
She does get punished for acting this way, but maybe not enough, lol.

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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Ugh, welcome to girl world :(
My daughter was a moody you-know-what from about that age. She didn't get her period until she was 13. She's almost 16 now and is finally starting to mellow out.
Just in time for her 12 year old sister to take her place as the queen of funk!

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L.F.

answers from San Francisco on

Hang in there---has she started her period yet?? I got mine when I was barely 11. If she hasn't yet, it will be coming soon! Take her comments with a grain of sand. She is most likely very confused and irritated and not liking the new hormone effects. Shower her with love and ignore the rest--- she will get past it....

M

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S.J.

answers from St. Louis on

Very typical for this age - and each child is different. She could be feeling those hormone surges already, even if her body won't start menstruation for a few more years.

Either way - have a heart to heart with her. Punishing her will do the exact opposite of help. She will be angrier and will end up resenting you. I am not saying you can't punish her at all if she is being disrespectful, but remember, most acting out at that age is due to things the child cannot control. They act on impulse.

And please, do not do what Gramma G suggests and cover this up with a pill that you have no idea what is in it and is simply masking the potential "real" problem (issues at school, with a person, etc). Medicine of any kind should be used as a LAST resort.

Talk to her. That is the best thing you can do right now. Then, talk some more. Eventually you WILL get through.

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J.K.

answers from Phoenix on

Both my girls were like that at that age. It seemed to get better after awhile then got bad again around the cycle. Then it gets better around age 15... =)

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Your daughter is a "Tween."
Tweens are from 9-12 years old.
Thus she is a Pre-Teen.

Do a Google Search on "Tween Girl Development." And many good articles will come up.

Yes, their hormones are getting tweaked. This is another major, age-juncture and time of developmental changes. Know that.

The "American Girl" book series is good. It is for girls this age, written easy to read and to be read by the child and the Mom.
Any book store will have it. It is a whole series for girls, per friends, body changes, behavior etc.

You said nothing has changed recently... BUT yes, there are changes. Because, your DAUGHTER is changing, developmentally.
They change physically and emotionally and mentally, at this age and at any age-phase juncture.

2 moms found this helpful

L.A.

answers from Austin on

Could be real PMS could also be cabin fever with all of this heat, so many kids are tired of being stuck inside. But with 100+ temps.. It is too darn hot and dangerous out there.. My car read 129 the other day when I opened the door.

Maybe she needs to hang out with some friends..swimming, even games inside. or a trip to the movies.. Or a sleepover.

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R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

While I started having periods 2 months after my 10th birthday (my grandma started at 8!) I didn't get bad PMS for a few years. But with hormonal changes going on in her body your daughter may be confused and frustrated and not feeling like she fits in with life anymore.

Sit her down and have some talks with her, let her know that you are aware that her body is changing, that if she has any questions you're there for her, but that the way she's feeling isn't an excuse to act out, never is for her or anyone. And open the door for her to ask questions and feel comfortable about her changes by getting her a first period kit,
http://www.dotgirlproducts.com/
http://www.myfirstperiodkit.com/

Have a mom and daughter day, pamper yourselves with facials, manicures and pedicures (DIY at home is fine) and let her know what a special time she's entering, and hopefully things will ease up, at least for now ; )

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A.H.

answers from Portland on

Punishing won't work with emotional changes. Talk to her, be there for her in a way that won't put her on the defense (which will be hard with her moodiness). It could be the stereotypical pre-teen hormones or it could be stress at school, acting out, or conflicts with friends. How to talk so kids will listen, I believe they have a teen version even though the kids one will work great. They have examples of preteens in the book and she will be suspicious at first if it isn't a normal practice, but will come around. Instead of punishing talk to her. You seem mad or I feel like you are yelling at "name" and let her talk. Or you can say if you are mad, that is okay but yelling at "name" is not appropriate behavior. I am here if you need to talk about anything that is bothering you.

When I was a preteen and teen my dad would punish me... it just built up resentment and made it worse. By the time I was 16 we had screaming matches.

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C.S.

answers from Atlanta on

Well as her parent ask her she is doing. Don't assume it's hormonal or something physical. It could be something emotionally distressing her to behave this way. When I was 10 I was being abused and acted out excessively but most everyone blamed it on me "growing up." Ask her if she is doing ok and listen to her.

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K.B.

answers from St. Louis on

I think it was between 10-11 that I took the inevitable turn to moody, overreacting drama queen . . . . It wasn't till about 19 that I became a rational, moody, overreacting drama queen. The rational part did help though lol

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S.S.

answers from Daytona Beach on

i started my period in the middle of 4th grade so i was 8. my sister started going into 4th grade so she was 8. could be she's starting to experience some of the effects of starting puberty.

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D.W.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hormones,she could be starting her period soon. She is in puberty and emotionss will run high. my cousin got her period at nine while I got mine at twelve. My body started going through changes when I was in fourth grade right around 9-10 years old. Get used to it. sorry.

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K.W.

answers from Youngstown on

I would say it is her hormones. Her body is getting ready for puberty. I remember my mom telling me that I was miserable to live with for the entire year before I started my period just before I was 12. I was moody and had a hard time handling life, even though I had it pretty easy. Sorry you are facing this, but you will get through it. Good luck.

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