Would You Want Your Friends to Join Your Gym?

I wouldn't assume she'll want to work out with you, until she actually mentions it. Until then, it's just speculation.

I agree that working out can be a very personal thing... I am a runner and I do occasionally run with a friend but overall I enjoy doing it solo. It's my time to clear my head and erase any emotional baggage. I was talking a friend the other day who lives out of town and she said that if she lived here she would run w/me. I was thinking about how I'm so glad that she doesn't live here so I don't have to get out of running with her. I think even the best friends can come with emotional baggage and that's something I don't need with me when I'm running.

I'd do what some other mamas have suggested about welcoming her to join and consult with a trainer, but tell her that workout time for you is personal time. Me time. Time for you to unwind and that you need that quiet time. Good luck!!

I can't workout with other people either, it slows me down, especially if they are wanting to have a conversation the whole time. I would have her meet with one of the trainers to have them put her on her own workout routine that way, if she wants, she can carpool with you but once at the gym, you two have to go your seperate ways to be able to meet your specific goals.

I don't think it matters if anyone else would want their friends to join. What is important is YOUR feelings about working out.

I don't think that I would talk about the subject to her at all. If you bring it up, then she will expect you to help her. And that isn't what you want.

Dawn

I am the same way. Just be honest with your friend. Explain you think it's great she wants to start working out but you don't like having a workout buddy. It's not personal, so don't make it personal.

I say stick with your schedule If she says something about joining just say something like "yeah I feel great after a good work out" and "it really allows me to gather my thoughts/day dream while I'm on the treadmill." Under no circumstances do you say that you will work out with her, and if she asks you to be her buddy say that you wouldn't be a good routine buddy because you always stick to your schedule and any other reason that you want to give her. If you are her friend it wouldn't be right to discourage her but if she is under the impression that you will help her, you do need to set her straight.

yes!!......some of my friends (most actually) have expressed an interest in losing weight. I have 2 sets of everything i use when i work out in case someone wants to join. I am motivated by company. 2 of the girls who said they wanted to workout with me NEVER do. 2 others do it in spurts. 1 friend will actually set dates and keep them but its not often. I am running out of workout buddies!

I do like to have a workout buddy, so, of course I would. But, it wont be a problem if you guys are in two differant places physically. My bf in college and I went to the gym together and I tried to do her workout. Nearly killed me. I wandered over to the stair climber and treadmill with the rest of the pudgy girls and was perfectly happy there. We would still go at the same time and encourage each other, but we split ways when we got there and met back up after. I think it would be nice if you encourage your friend and try yo motivate her to go, but really, she will know she's out of her league trying to keep up with you. Direct her to the Zumba class. She will love it.

Funny you ask this b/c I was just thinking about this the other day. I'm still new to the gym thing. I have been a member for almost a year now w/ steady attendance, maybe a couple 2 week lapses but not bad. When I 1st joined, I asked all my friends to come along, everyone declined & a couple joined places more convienent for them ( understandable). After thinking about it, I'm so glad I go on my own. Like you , I have a routine & when I have to change that routine for scheduling conflicts, no big deal , I don't feel the need to work around my "partners" schedule. Also, everyone's workout preferences are different and should be. I think if you feel forced to do what your partner is doing but it isn't a good fit, a person wouldn't't be successful / stay committed. I honestly don't think I would still be going had I joined w/ someone else. A couple of my friends that joined other places aren't going any longer. I've made friends at the gym that are in the same classes & have the same fitness interests.

I don't see a problem with it. Encourage her to join and get a personal trainer so she knows what to do. Wish her luck and if you happen to be working out at the same time don't worry about it. Keep doing what you're doing. Be polite. Hey glad you joined.....Gotta run...gotta get 4 miles in this hour. Catch you later. Or see ya gotta run but let's catch up when we're done working out and you can tell me how it went for you...If you're on a schedule people need to understand. I am sure she'll get the point quickly.

I have been a gym goer for years too..don't stress if she joins.. Be encouraging.. Is there one work out a week like a spin class u guys could take together where u will be there for support but work your butt off..

One of my walking buddies is like this. She "needs" me to walk with her or else she won't go. Sometimes she even tries to guilt me a little (oh I haven't gotten my walk because you've been so busy lately...urgh!) Exercise can be fun with a friend but it can also be time to unwind by yourself.
Just keep doing what you're doing. If she decides to join, say great, good for you! If she pushes you to change your routine to accommodate hers, just explain that you've got a schedule that works for you and you need to stick with it. It sounds like she may not be there long anyway.

Updated

One of my walking buddies is like this. She "needs" me to walk with her or else she won't go. Sometimes she even tries to guilt me a little (oh I haven't gotten my walk because you've been so busy lately...urgh!) Exercise can be fun with a friend but it can also be time to unwind by yourself.
Just keep doing what you're doing. If she decides to join, say great, good for you! If she pushes you to change your routine to accommodate hers, just explain that you've got a schedule that works for you and you need to stick with it. It sounds like she may not be there long anyway.

I would tell her that you really enjoy your own personal alone time at the gym. That you would love for her to join your gym but truly you would not be a good gym partner as you love being a loner at the gym. Hopefuly you can have a suggestion on who would be a good gym partner. Perhaps even a trainer. I totally understand what your saying. I go for evening walks and hate when people want to join me. Thats the time i clear my head and have my alone time at what ever speed I want! Hope she understands and there are no hard feelings for her. If you keep it light and pin it all on how terrible a partner you would be perhaps she will think of a better person to help her out.

Yes, I'd love to have a friend to talk to while working out. It makes the time go by faster, and is way more fun than talking to the weight machines. It's also possible to belong to the same gym and never see your friends if your schedules are different or you are doing different activities at the same time. Stick to your own schedule and let your friend come at that time if she wants to see you. Get your own workout done first and don't let her distract you from your routine. Then if you have time afterwards you can go out for tea (or not). That way your friend can give the gym a try, and it doesn't take anything away from the schedule and good habits you've established for yourself.

I myself would say no but I wouldn't tell my friend that. I would just not encourage her to think that I would be her workout buddy. I go five times a week and have a specific time frame to workout because of the childcare available. Over the years I have streamlined a routine that would work with my body and my timeframe. I would love to be able to accomodate friends but Lo! I consider gym time "me" time. I do run into coworkers sometimes at the gym and that ten minute conversation throws my whole workout off. If you have leeway time, then by all means but as a single working mother... keep your time your time. She'll understand especially with her track record.

Well the thing is:
1) she is your friend
2) you like to work out by yourself
3) she should understand that
4) you both DO NOT HAVE TO, have the same workout schedules.
She goes when she wants. You go when you want.
5) SINCE she is your friend, you TELL her... you like to workout by yourself whenever you want. And she should understand.

The thing is, just because she joins 'your' gym... it does not automatically make you, her work out 'buddy'.
You are both, individuals with INDEPENDENT... workout schedules.

6) IF she is the type that 'needs' a workout buddy... then tell her... to get a GYM TRAINER, there at the gym.
Not you.

7) You are not responsible for her workout or her workout habits or not. And you are not a default workout buddy, just because she happens to join 'your' gym.

8) again, she is your friend. So you tell her, if you need to, that you are not coordinating 'your' workout schedule, with hers. You like to workout by yourself. Even if you both happen to be there at the same time.

I would just let her know that she's welcome to join, and you'd be happy to say hi, and encourage her, but you prefer working out on your own, and you have a pretty good routine. Maybe you could just take a break together, or get a drink together after your workout. Set the line where you are comfortable, and let her decide if that would work for her for herself. It doesn't need to be an issue. GL!

Judge much? Sounds like you think you are Ms. Workout and afraid that your friend might get healthy and you will no longer be the only "regular gym goer".

Here's an idea, be supportive of your friend. Let her do her thing and you do yours. Sounds like there is some real underlying jealousy and resentment going on. Is this person really your friend?

depends how much you really want to help your friend. i go on my own in the early morning so usually no one else wants to wake up at 4:15 to meet me there.

just be honest with her. also, be honest and ask her what makes this time different than others.